Butterfly's dream
by mitimai
Summary: The Illusive man didn't allow Miranda to plant control chip in Shepard's brain, but that didn't mean he don't have another plan for her. Unfortunately, some people had their own agenda. Now, rewritten!
1. From the crow's nest

Rewrite: with Beta at last. Thanks to The Lonely Traveler, my dear Beta. You have my gratitude.

_The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly.  
- Richard Bach_

* * *

**From the Crow's Nest**

* * *

Earth was on fire.

If the Armageddon in the Book was real, this would have been it. The enormous machines came from the sky. Their powerful lasers burned and destroyed everything in its wake. On the ground, hordes of monsters charged in. Human tried to fight back, but there were too many.

Swaying, and then falling, the feed was cut just a few seconds after a husk grabbed the cameraman. Still, the last thing it caught was the horrible sound from the machines. It was the horrid voice of the horn of the Reapers.

At another location, Commander Amala Shepard turned her face away from the screen in rage. Same as James, she didn't want to leave Earth. But Anderson was right. They couldn't win this war without the help from the other species in the galaxy.

She came asking for help from the council. Well, perhaps she shouldn't have been surprised. Three years ago, she told them about Sovereign and they didn't believe her until it hit the Citadel. About two years later, she told them about the Collectors, and they ignored it. How could she have expected them to be helpful this time?

Damn. That day she sacrificed a whole fleet of Alliance soldiers to save their asses. And all they repaid them with was a seat for a human councilor. Shepard chose Anderson as councilor until he decided to step down. However, the seat still didn't give humans much of an advantage.

To her surprise, Udina sided with her. That arrogant bastard always was a pain in the ass but this time, he tried to convince the council to send help to Earth. She still didn't trust him, though.

She had the schematics for the Crucible: the Prothean's weapon that might help them defeat the Reapers, but it wasn't enough for the council.

The Crucible... Shepard bit her lip in frustration. They got the data from Mars but almost lost the man she loved in the process. Now, he was unconscious in Huerta hospital and no one was certain he would pull through.

No, don't cry, she told herself. Commander Shepard couldn't show her weakness in public. Gnashing her teeth, Shepard walked toward the airlock that connected to the Normandy.

"Commander Shepard?" a small voice called her from behind.

Quickly, the Commander spun around. She saw a very thin and pale woman. The face wasn't familiar, but at least she didn't look like another Conrad Verner.

"What can I help you with?" Commander Shepard replied. People seemed to think Commander Shepard was running some kind of service business. But, she tried to stay polite.

Looking around as if she feared to be seen, the woman thrust something in her hand. "Cargo bay number E3. If the guard asks you anything, just tell him 'butterfly'. Please, go there as soon as possible."

Shepard tried to protest but the mysterious woman left so quickly. She looked down at the OSD in her hand and gasped in shock when she took a good look at it.

The logo on it was Cerberus.

Should I go? The question swirled in her mind. This could be a trap.

If it's a trap, they wouldn't use Cerberus' logo. Another side of her mind disagreed. But, that woman was really desperate.

After thinking for a moment, Shepard decided to go, but she wasn't going there alone.

* * *

"There's no cargo bay number E3, Shepard," Liara told her. "They shut that place down after Sovereign's attack."

"That means it's a good place to hide something." Shepard walked into the elevator and chose their destination. Almost three years since she hadn't stepped foot in the wards. And somehow she missed her old companions, Ashley and Kaidan and wished they were there with her.

The cargo bay was in the lower ward that had been shut down for years. So it was in ruin despite the keeper's attempt to restore it. Shepard had to hack the door.

As soon as it hissed opened, a familiar turian pointed his gun at them. However, he lowered it down when he realized who she was.

"Commander Shepard," he didn't look so surprised.

"Sidonis, I thought you would never return here?"

About a year ago, she saved his life from Garrus' grudge. That time he swore to disappear, but here he was.

"I had to." The turian glanced another way for a second. Although it was hard to read the turian's expression, Shepard could tell he was in trouble. "I knew you would come but... One can't be too careful. Tell me; what's the caterpillar calls the end of the world?"

What an odd question? The Commander might not have been able to think of the answer if that woman hadn't told her.

"Butterfly," Shepard replied.

He sighed, either out of relief or regret, she didn't know. "I know you have so many questions, but you should meet someone first."

Inside the old cargo was a ton of junk. Some were empty barrels. Sidonis opened one of those and then a little girl crawled out. Very gently, the turian helped her stand and led her by the hand to Shepard.

Shy, or perhaps out of fear, the girl hid behind her guard as she was looking at the visitors. Shepard couldn't take a good look at her until Sidonis gently pushed the girl toward her.

"Goddess..." Liara exclaimed as she saw that face. She stared at the Commander and the girl repeatedly to make sure her eyes hadn't deceived her.

The timid, frightened, and nervous girl that was staring at them almost looked like a miniature version of Shepard. But her eyes were warm brown instead of bright green. Her wavy hair was darker than Shepard's dark-brown.

Her legs gave in, Shepard fell on her knees. Still, her hands reached out to hold the girl. When the little one finally yielded to her embrace, the badass Commander couldn't hold her tears anymore.

"Mommy," that wasn't a question. It seemed the girl knew who she was.

"Yes, I'm your mommy." At least that's what her instinct told her. "But how...?"

"There's no time to talk," Sidonis chimed in. "Take Butterfly out of here before Cerberus finds out. They're after her since she was in Marian's womb."

"What?"

"Didn't Marian give you something? Everything you want to know is inside it. Just take Butterfly and leave, don't make Marian's sacrifice in vain."

He was going to leave, but Butterfly grabbed him. "Sid.."

Shepard couldn't say she knew much about the turian, but Sidonis was tender when he wiped the tear from Butterfly's cheeks.

"I have to go now, my star. Please stay safe for all of us." She was about to cry, but bit her lower lip to suppress it. "Spirit will always protect you."

"I won't forget you, ever." Through tears, Butterfly promised.

"Then I'll be with you forever. Now go, and don't look back." It was a sad smile, but somehow a satisfied one.

Still confused, but Shepard did as she was told. She carried the girl out the door while Liara watched her back. And as soon as the door shut tight, they heard an explosion within the abandoned cargo bay.

"Why... Why did he?" the asari asked.

There was no answer. There was no sound other than Butterfly in Shepard's arms crying.

* * *

The chapter's name came from Thai's classic lullaby: the cuckoo. The song is about a cuckoo that laid her egg in the crow's nest. Of course, the crow thought that little bird was hers, so she raised the little cuckoo as her own. By the way, the song didn't end well. The hunter captured both of them and cooked them for his dinner.


	2. Flying in the dream sky

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta. :D

* * *

"_It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live."__  
__―__J.K. Rowling__, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_

**Flying in the Dream Sky**

* * *

Shepard turned the light off, only the blue light from the fish tank illuminating the cabin. On her bed, Butterfly was sleeping. Her brows still furrowed, and she was thrashing around frequently as if she was having a nightmare.

Butterfly wasn't much older than two years, but she had already lived a hard life. Her attire was old, although it was clean and repaired neatly. On her honey tone skin were a lot of faint scars.

Sidonis said the answers were in that OSD. Even with fear, the Commander inserted it in her console.

Automatically, the vid began to play.

It was a man she didn't know. His face wasn't familiar. However, the calmness of the old man felt like a bad omen.

"Hello... Um, sorry. I'm not sure how to start this," he smiled a little but it didn't reach his eyes.

"Commander Shepard, I wished to meet you in person. But I hope one of my patients gives this OSD to you."

"Name's Arum Folic. I'm a doctor and I worked for Cerberus. In the time, I am recording this, you're still in project Lazarus but I believe they'll succeed. And... I want to tell you I'm so sorry."

"Knowing Miss Lawson, I know she will tell you about her attempt to insert a controlling chip in your head. The Illusive Man stopped her, but don't think he doesn't want to control you. He does want to control you, just not with the chip. His attempt is... worse."

She had the feeling this wasn't going to be good.

"When we got your body, we found you were carrying a child. Neither of you survived but the Illusive Man didn't want to resurrect your child. Still, we had enough DNA from the embryo for... cloning."

Her breathe stuck in her chest.

"It was easy to do that. The embryo had no personality so we didn't have to rebuild it. We just cloned it and let it grow. Well, that's what I thought anyway."

"There are five samples planted inside five women just in case something goes wrong. Everything looked fine until two of my patients lost the embryo and they just 'disappeared'. I know something isn't right and I can't let it happen to the rest. So I'm attempting a plan of escape for them."

"Marian, Liz and Rachel will leave tonight. But I won't go with them. This place is an abomination and I have to destroy the Caterpillar project. I'll give this OSD to each of them, however."

The old man smiled again, but this time he seemed relieved.

"I hope they will be saved, and if possible, will be able to give this OSD to you. I really wish I could give you a proper apologize. And even though I don't deserve your mercy, please accept my apology."

The vid ended but Shepard couldn't move. Cerberus cloned her daughter so TIM would control her through the girl? Thankfully, Dr. Arum helped those women escape before the Illusive Man had the chance. Now she knew why Cerberus was hunting Marian down.

But what's about the rest of them? Did Liz and Rachel survive?

Another vid played automatically. The woman who gave her the OSD was on the screen.

"Commander Shepard..."

She was somewhere dark, thus Shepard couldn't recognize the background.

"My name's Marian White. When you're watching this, I might already be dead." Her voice cracked. "But I hope Butterfly is with you. Of all people, you're the only one I can trust to keep her safe."

"Dr. Arum already told you. They cloned your child and planted her inside me and my friends. It may sound like an excuse, but I swear I didn't know their plan until Doc told me I had to run. And... God save his soul. I was there when the whole lab burned down."

"After that night, Liz, Rachel, and I separated but still kept in touch. Last I heard of them, their children died in labor. But I wondered if the Illusive Man would let them get away."

She stopped to look at a girl who was sleeping nearby. Her eyes full of tears but she still smiled.

"I confess, Commander, I used to think about giving her to them so they might let me go. But after I held her in my arms for the first time, I knew I could never do it. God, I can't even go to the Alliance. Cerberus would get to us before we reach them. Thank god for Sidonis. He saved us when we were trapped on Irune five months ago and stayed with us ever since."

What if she hadn't saved him from Garrus' wrath? Shepard couldn't bear the thought.

"When I heard about Earth, I knew you would come to the Citadel. Alas, Cerberus is on our trail too, so I couldn't just go to you. Please forgive me for not telling you the truth."

After all this, Shepard would have given Marian anything. In fact, she couldn't thank Marian enough. That woman gave birth and raised Butterfly as if she was her own even though Cerberus was hunting them down.

"I'd plan to lead those dogs to another cargo bay. Sidonis promised to stay with Butterfly until you came and then destroy anything that might lead Cerberus to you. Although I don't want him to get involved, it's too late. I just... I wish he lives. For me... since the Illusive Man sends Kai Leng after me, I knew my chance of surviving were slim."

Kai Leng... Shepard thought she had heard that name before.

"I know I will never see Butterfly again. But at least I can rest in peace knowing she's safe with you. And thank you, Commander. Although you didn't mean for it to happen, I'm glad for the change of raising her like my own. Butterfly is sweetest girl I'd ever..."

A peep interrupted her. Marian sighed sadly.

"I have so many things to tell you. Like... how quickly she learns things. She loves music, but hates loud noises... But I have to stop recording now. Just... if she has problem sleeping, she needs someone to hold her and sing her a lullaby. Her favorite song is..."

The vid cut off. Shepard tried to replay it but that was it. Marian's Omni-tool might have lacked energy or something.

There was no chance to learn what Marian wanted to say. But the Commander knew how much she loved Butterfly already.

"You have a new message from Commander Bailey," EDI reported. However, the blue orb said it in a quieter tone than usual as if she understood the girl needed silence.

"Thanks EDI." She opened the message. For Butterfly's sake, she had asked the C-Sec officer to search for Marian. She just hoped they hadn't been too late.

Alas, they were.

Reading those words again and again, Shepard almost groaned in frustration. C-Sec officers found both Marian and Sidonis. She had been killed and left to rot in a dark alley in the lower wards. Not far from her body, the turian was there. It seemed he tried to stop her attacker but failed.

They both had been killed by a sharp object.

"Mary, Sid!" Butterfly cried in her sleep. Her hands were reaching out as if she was trying to grab something... or someone.

Shepard couldn't stand it anymore, she held her daughter tight, tried to sooth her with sweet words.

She really wished Butterfly's father was with them. He used to calm her down when she had nightmares. Soothing the frighten girl wouldn't be hard for him to handle.

Marian said a lullaby would help Butterfly sleep. Too bad, the Commander wasn't that vocally talented. Garrus said she sung like a drunken Elcor.

So she played a song from her Omni-tool. The song she recorded from one of the most precious day in her lifetime. A rich, smooth, and calming voice lulled them both to the dream realm.

_Flying in the dream sky_

_With ragging wings of butterfly_

_Hurting, crying but alive_

_And butterfly still beautiful_

_._

_Perfection is a lie_

_Flaw makes you complete_

_Mistake gives you strength_

_And pain grants the wisdom_

_._

_Happiness, sadness, is all just the wind_

_They come and go, in time_

* * *

I wrote this song myself, so it might not be as beautiful. My apologies.


	3. Dream of butterfly

_"I dreamed I was a butterfly, flitting around in the sky; then I awoke. Now I wonder: Am I a man who dreamt of being a butterfly, or am I a butterfly dreaming that I am a man?"_

_-Chuang Tzu_

* * *

**Dream of Butterfly**

* * *

Something was on her nose. The contact was light and tickled her. Still half asleep, Shepard opened her eyes to see what was on her nose.

She saw a glowing butterfly. The little creature was radiant with a warm blue aura that was not too bright in the light of the middle of the day. However, it flitted away quickly.

The Commander looked around and slowly sat up. Judging from the surrounding, this was a dream. Around her was glowing wood. But instead of the sun above her head, the source of light came from an enormous tree.

Curious, Shepard reached for the butterfly-like leaf on the lowest branch. But before her finger could touch it, the leaf moved and then flitted away.

No, it wasn't a leaf. It was a glowing butterfly. Every leaves on the tree were butterflies.

"I dreamed I was a butterfly, flitting around in the sky; then I awoke. Now I wonder: Am I a man who dreamt of being a butterfly, or am I a butterfly dreaming that I am a man?"

What an odd question? Shepard was looking around to find the questioner, but the only possibility was her Butterfly.

The girl was sitting quietly on one of giant roots. She looked at Shepard just a few seconds before she turned around to look toward the reddish sky.

Just like her father, Butterfly didn't talk much. She barely said anything unless someone asked her a question, but her eyes were always full of unspoken words. Shepard could say Butterfly considered every word before she spoke them.

It was a shame Butterfly didn't smile more often.

"Hey," Shepard greeted as she sat down beside the girl.

She didn't flinch, just sat still and gave the woman a half-hearted smile. At least, it was an improvement.

The Commander tried to think about what she ought to say. Strange, she was able to give a speech to her crew or in front of the crowd, but she was barely able to initiate a conversation with her daughter.

Being a mother wasn't an easy task.

Wait... This was a dream, wasn't it? But how could the pressure feel so damn real?

"Am I a problem?" Butterfly asked.

Those words brought her back to her daughter. Shepard looked up and sad brown eyes were staring back. Oh my, those puppy eyes just...

"Absolutely not," She couldn't say she loved this little Shepard, at least not yet. "Well, I knew I might have been cold, but that's because I don't know how to... Your father always said he needed some time to process things. I hope he doesn't mind if I borrow that line."

Butterfly smiled, and the world was a little brighter. "I understand."

She gathered the small child in her arms and Shepard felt much better. Even it was only a dream it still felt good.

"Mommy, do you really believe you can win this war?"

That question came out of nowhere, and almost took Shepard off guard. "What?"

Butterfly sighed. "You're so little compare to them. How could we win this?"

Dreams come from your subconscious, so this dream must be caused by her worry. There's no reason to act tough, in this situation. "I won't lie. I'm not sure if we're going to win. The Reapers... They're so many. And people just keep looking out for themselves. I... It's just the start, but I almost lost your dad. I can't... I can't concentrate."

"Are you going to give up?" Butterfly asked sadly.

"Of course not! I won't give up without a fight. Your dad was always my reason to keep going. We're not losing him yet and... I would do anything to make sure you grow up in the world without fear."

Smiling, the girl held her mother tight. "I love you, mom. But I must warn you. You'll need more than an army and firearms to win this war."

"I'm not surprised. It took a whole fleet to take down one Reaper. But there are at least hundreds of them on Earth. Our only chance to survive is the whole galaxy must unite."

Butterfly stared at her as if trying to find the lie behind those words. Eventually, she smiled again, "That's my mom!"

They laughed. Shepard realized that she hadn't laugh like that since... her last shore leave before the first Normandy went down. God... It felt like an eternity.

"I wish your dad was here, with us."

"He will be, sooner or later," the little girl promised. "It's time to wake up. You have so many things to do, mom."

Her consciousness flashed to white. When Shepard opened her eyes again, she was in her cabin. At first, she panicked because Butterfly wasn't there.

"Butterfly is in the mess hall, Shepard. Dr. T'Soni brought her there to have breakfast. She didn't want to disturb you, so she asked me to tell you when you woke up," EDI reported.

"Oh, thank EDI. But you can wake me anytime if it involves Butterfly." She didn't want to sound like an overprotective mother, but her daughter was more important than her sleep.

"Noted. One more thing; Dr. Chakwas wanted to know if she could check Butterfly's health. She said the girl is too thin. It's pertinent the doctor makes sure Butterfly is healthy."

The first thing Chakwas did when she returned was to check Shepard's condition. Not surprising she wanted to make sure Butterfly was well.

"She has my permission. But I have one more favor to ask... Never mind, I'll tell her myself. I'll be in the med bay in ten minutes."

* * *

**Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta :D**


	4. Butterfly's effect

_"Beautiful and graceful, varied and enchanting, small but approachable, butterflies lead you to the sunny side of life. And everyone deserves a little sunshine."_

_-Jeffrey Glassberg_

* * *

**Butterfly Effect**

* * *

Dr. Karin Chakwas tried to hide her nervousness as she showed the DNA chart to Commander Shepard. After learning about Project Catepillar, Shepard wasn't surprised but was nonetheless thrilled about the results.

"The test proves Dr. Arum didn't lie to you. Butterfly is 99% yours." Shepard never told her who was Butterfly's father, but Chakwas had an idea.

In another circumstance, she would say congratulations. Normally, a woman had nine months or so to prepare, but the Commander had none of that. The Collectors robbed her of two years and destroyed her chance to raise her infant daughter. Even though, the girl found her way back, her father's life was still in limbo.

Being Commander Shepard had never been easy.

Outside the med bay, Butterfly was sitting on the mess table. She smiled shyly to Liara and the other crewmembers as James was cooking her breakfast. Everyone thought she was a girl that Shepard rescued from Cerberus, except for Liara. If anyone noticed the resemblance between the two, they didn't say anything.

"She has beautiful eyes," the doctor said to no one in particular.

"Yes, she does," Shepard sighed, "Whisky brown... Just like her father."

Chakwas didn't mean to pry but she asked, "Will you tell him about her? I know it is none of my business but he has a right to know. Besides, Admiral Hackett ought to..."

"I know. But I can't do it, not when he's still... You know who he is, don't you?"

"You two tried to keep it secret, but he lost it when you died," with a sad smile, the Doc thought back to that day, "he looked more like a husk than a human being. It took a year for him to recover."

Shepard had known. On the Shadow Broker's ship, she found information about what he had done in her absence. He took many dangerous missions as if he didn't care about living. Every year, on the day the old Normandy went down, he would go to her empty grave to place a bouquet of sunflowers; her favorite.

It might have sounded absurd, but he was her only reason to stop the Collectors and return.

"I'll tell him if he... when he wakes up," Shepard promised to Chakwas and herself. Still, thinking about the Admiral made her nervous, "about Hackett... I'm not sure how to tell him."

"Commander, you found a way through the Omega 4 Relay and we all came back alive. Speaking to the old man won't kill you."

There are only a few men she respected; Hackett was one of them.

"Perhaps after Palaven," looking through the window, Shepard smiled at the sight of Butterfly. The girl was eating Machaca con Huevos quietly without any help. Marian taught her well, it appeared.

And that reminded her of a favor to ask.

"Can you take care of Butterfly when I go on missions?"

"Why not? She is the sweetest girl I've ever met. I'll be glad to baby-sit her."

Shepard herself wasn't quite fond of children. She thought they were nothing but annoying and troublesome creatures. Perhaps it was because she never known her own parents. Living on the street didn't give her much of an idea about parenting. Although, having a daughter of her own was another thing entirely.

"Speaking of which, isn't she too quiet? I mean... Aren't children supposed to be hyperactive? Well, not that I mind or anything. But Butterfly rarely talks. Sometimes, it makes me feel like I've done something wrong."

"I'm not psychiatrist, but I think that's understandable. It's only been a few days since she's been here. Although she is your daughter, we all are strangers to her. Besides, from her history, Marian might have taught her to not bring attention to herself."

The truth was always difficult to accept. Although she knew it wasn't her fault, Shepard still felt bad not being there when they needed protection. The Illusive Man never let his tools escape. If it had its uses, he'd keep it, otherwise, he'd destroy it. Marian and Butterfly must have had a hard time running from Cerberus for almost two years.

"That makes sense. Still, I hope I'll make a good mother." She grew up in an orphanage, never having met her parents. Her namesake came from the man who found her in the dark alley of New York City when she was a baby.

"You'll be fine, Commander. Just give yourself some time and you both will come along eventually," to confirm her theory, Dr. Chakwas pointed to the mess table.

Out there, Liara used her biotics to lift a spoon in the air, while Butterfly was staring in excitement. Soon, the crew began to converse with her and the girl talked back. She was shy, but not fearful.

"It's worth a try," Shepard smiled. "By the way, I should speak to Hackett. Wish me luck, doc." The Commander decided it was best to speak with Hackett now, and not delay in telling him the truth.

Dr. Chakwas smiled back in kind, but something still troubled her. "I'm curious. Why the Caterpillar Project?"

"What?"

"Cerberus' projects always have meaningful names. So why did they name it Caterpillar Project? I can't stop wondering. When the time comes, caterpillars turn themselves to butterflies. I just hope the Illusive Man didn't mean to turn her to something."

When she put it that way, Shepard began to worry. "He might. I read Kai Leng's dossier from the Shadow Broker's files. He's the Illusive Man's assassin and bodyguard. If TIM sent his best to hunt them, it must be because Butterfly is valuable for him."

"Whatever the Illusive Man is up to can't be good. That's for sure."

After their encounter on Mars, Shepard knew too well. "He has a twisted mind. I would never let that bastard lay his hands on my Butterfly. One way or another, I'll make him pay for trying to kill her father."

"That's one more reason to tell Hackett," Chakwas suggested.

"Yeah, you're right. I just hope I won't give him more grey hair, and he won't court-martial me after this war, on second thought, I think I should bring her with me."

"Is that a good idea? He probably doesn't know who her father is. Seeing her might give him some idea."

"They would meet eventually." Besides, she felt like she bringing her daughter to meet grandpa, even though the meeting was only on the communication channel, not in person. "Secret don't last forever."

* * *

In Shepard's opinion, one of the best things Butterfly inherited from her father was his calmness. Even, fully hardened soldiers (Shepard included) were threatened to the bone when Admiral Hackett gave them 'that' look, but the girl just smiled.

He almost smiled back.

But the man had nerves of steel. He still masked himself as the stern Admiral although his lips were trying to arch up. "This is big, Shepard."

"I'm small," Butterfly protested.

The two soldiers stared at her, not sure if she was just too naive or being sarcastic.

Her smirk told them she was being the latter.

Oh god, I hope she didn't inherit that trait of mine. Anderson never complained about her sarcasm but Hackett never liked it.

To her surprise, the old man chuckled. "I don't have to look at the DNA chart, Shepard. This girl is a lot like you. Let me know if she headbutts a Krogan."

"She has to be tall enough first, so you'll have to wait at least a decade." After several days of angst, she thought she wouldn't return to the same old sarcastic Commander. She was wrong, it appeared.

Butterfly moaned in disappointment, making her mother wonder if the girl was too smart for a baby.

Marian called her a fast learner. But when Dr. Chakwas' pointed it out, Shepard worried if Butterfly's sharp wit wasn't a natural trait. The Illusive Man always expected the best. He might have ordered his staff to build the girl with special abilities: a perfect human for his 'humanity first at all cost' plan.

"What are you going to do next?" the Admiral asked, "Cerberus is after her, so we can't send her away. Still, the Normandy is a battleship. Having a baby on board doesn't sound convenient."

"I prefer keeping Butterfly with me, sir. The Illusive Man sent his best after her. Kai Leng already killed the people trying to protect her. I don't want to risk it," The Commander stopped in her speech when the girl in her arms stiffed.

_Damn_, the Commander thought. She forgot Butterfly didn't know yet.

Butterfly's face dropped. She looked sad but didn't say anything.

Hackett didn't notice. "I can't think of any better place to keep her. Just be careful, Kai Leng is a dangerous bastard."

"You know him?"

"Only by reports, Anderson could tell you more. They had had a run in some time ago. Anderson shot both of his legs but that wasn't enough to stop him, it seems."

"I bet the Illusive Man didn't just patch him up." Those guys she encountered on Mars weren't human anymore. Cerberus certainly did something to them. Surely, TIM thought it was an improvement. He might have turned his bodyguard into a human weapon already.

"He's dangerous, indeed. So I suggest you keep Butterfly a secret. I've received a report about a Cerberus lab. They were researching Reaper's tech. I want you to storm in and grab the information."

Do I look like a postman? Shepard rolled her eyes. Still, if it would help win this war, might be worth it. She would retrieve these artifacts for him, but after asking some questions.

"Are you sure you want those? The last Reaper researcher I knew had been indoctrinated and tried to bring them to our galaxy."

She didn't say the name, but the old man knew whom she meant. "We need the Reaper information, Shepard. We need anything that might help us win."

Only thing she wanted to know about the Reapers was how to destroy them. Unfortunately, that wasn't easy to find out. Besides, she had to follow the Admiral's order. "Alright, I'll do it. But it has to be after Palaven. I've got a Primarch to rescue."

Hackett nodded. He was about to dismiss her when he changed his mind. "One more thing, Shepard. When you tell Alenko about Butterfly, you better made sure he's sitting. I still remember how I felt when my wife told me she was pregnant. Hackett out."

Butterfly said goodbye in a sing-song tone, Shepard was slightly shocked by Butterfly's goodbye.

* * *

It's absurd, and stupid. James knew he was being ridiculous but he couldn't help it.

He didn't like that girl.

There was no reason to behave like that. Butterfly never gave him or anyone any problems. She just sat there, out of everyone's way, and kept looking at everything.

Maybe Cortez was right. He was just jealous because she got everyone's attention without trying. Butterfly was a beautiful girl and her smile could melt anyone to submission.

Shepard didn't tell the crew who Butterfly was, but only the blind wouldn't see their resemblance. The girl could be Shepard's relative. She almost looked like Shepard except for her eyes and hair.

Her eyes... Well, those could be his reason. They're too warm, too knowing, too... He didn't know. But sometimes, he had the feeling the girl could see through his glibness to his soul. Although she barely spoke, (which made her a bit creepy), didn't mean she was ignorant. In fact, she was very far from it. If it was up to him, he would name her Raven; the little sly creature.

She was too smart for her own good. That's for sure.

And then, she was in the shuttle bay, waiting patiently while the team was suiting up. Shepard wanted her there before they took off to Palaven. Just for luck, maybe.

He was waiting in the shuttle when the Commander held the girl for the last time. Butterfly nestled Shepard's shoulder like a pup. She looked more than happy to be there.

In the moment like this, she didn't look like an odd child. Her smile was genuine, which made her look, well, young.

Of course, the baby was very young. There was nothing wrong about Butterfly's reaction. God... He was behaving like an idiot.

Shepard kissed her forehead before she passed her child to Chakwas. Her small hand was still waving when the shuttle took off. Liara and Shepard returned the gesture with wide smiles. James couldn't help but think they looked cute waving goodbye.

Still, he didn't like Butterfly.

* * *

**Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta :D**


	5. Newcomer

_"You have made known to me the path of life; you will find me with joy in your presence."_

_- Psalms 16_

* * *

**Newcomer**

* * *

A friend is always a friend.

When she asked him to join her in the suicide mission, he didn't hesitate to accept. Now, the Reapers came and she needed all the help possibly especially that of old friends. How could he refuse when she asked for his assistance?

Since the First Contact War, humans and turians didn't exactly get along. But Garrus didn't have a problem working on a human ship, as long as Shepard was their leader.

By all means, returning to the Normandy felt like coming back home. After the team brought the new Primarch off Palaven's moon, he decided to stay and assist in the Reaper war.

Shepard was too busy to introduce him to everyone on board. So he went around the ship to speak with the crew. And just a few minutes after he visited the crew's deck, he found Butterfly drawing something in a data pad. It wasn't an understatement to say the sight of the small human shocked him.

He'd seen human children, of course. There were a lot of them in the Citadel. But the Normandy was the last place he expected to see a child.

"Hello," the girl greeted him with a shy smile on her face.

Garrus was taken aback. Mostly, his scar threatened children, but this one didn't seem to care. There was a long silence in the mess hall until he realized he better say something, "Um, hello."

"Are you mommy's friend?," she tilted her head cutely.

Some locks too short to braid fell on her face. Raven hair was contrasted by her creamy skin and also brought out her wide whisky-brown eyes. Even though he was turian, he still thought she was adorable.

Wait, hadn't he seen those eyes before?

"That depends on... Who is your mommy?" _Keep your cool,_ Garrus, he warned himself. _You're turian. You can't squeal like a girl._

The girl stretched herself up from the table, and showed him a N7 logo on her oversized t-shirt.

Yeah, he wasn't completely surprised. She almost looked like a wee version of Shepard. The turian felt stupid for asking the silly question. "Name's Garrus. I'm your mother's best friend."

Those eyes grew wider. She was thinking about something before she jumped off the mess table. Garrus almost went towards her as he saw she was trying to pour the blue liquor from the bottle. And then, she returned with a glass of a turian drink.

"Come sit," the girl placed the glass in front of him.

Finally Garrus thought a human with proper manners. Where did she learn to be a generous host, anyway? "Thank you, um..."

"Everyone calls me Butterfly." She returned to her seat on the opposite side of Garrus.

"Butterfly, what does that mean?"

Instead of explaining the word, she searched for a picture in her data pad and then showed him. "This is a butterfly."

The turian hummed in approval. _This girl is smart,_ Garrus thought. "Beautiful creature, isn't it?"

"Happiness is like a butterfly, which appears and delights us for one brief moment, but soon flits away," she read a quote under the picture, from Anna Pavlova.

That... sounded strange. "You can read well for a... How old are you anyway?"

"Can't remember," Butterfly sounded troubled.

As far as he knew, human are viviparous, which meant their embryos developed inside a female's body. But he'd known Shepard for years and never witnessed her pregnancy. This girl couldn't just pop out of nowhere, right?

"Where did you come from?," those words came out before he could stop them.

"Somewhere far and also near," that still didn't make sense to Garrus. Still, it didn't sound like meaningless mumble, either. She looked so sincere, as if she really meant it.

_Is that a human code or something?_ The turian didn't get it.

"Ar, what does that mean?"

Butterfly pouted as she was thinking. "It's... complicated."

"Complicated... You're such a strange girl." Just like her mother. Um, speaking of which, "Who is your father?"

"Grandpa said his name is Alenko." Whisky-brown eyes were sparking in excitement. "Do you know him?"

He wasn't surprised. "Yes, I do. He is a good man, despite..." Telling the girl about her dad's bad attitude didn't sound like a good idea. So he just changed the subject. "Anyway, I thought Shepard was an orphan. Who is your grandpa?"

As if she sensed his discomfort, Butterfly added, "Hackett."

"Oh, that old man." He better ask Shepard later, he took note. The little one wasn't a talker. "Well, what're you doing?"

"Painting," she showed him her drawing.

It was a picture of a turian and human female on the beach. Garrus didn't know the blond human but the blue turian looked very familiar.

"You have talent." He never had a chance to learn how to paint, but still appreciated good art. "Would you mind if I ask? Who are they?"

"Mary and Sid," her face softened. "Mary and I traveled a lot, but mostly we were in hiding. She hoped one day we would go somewhere tropical, sitting on the beach and swim in the ocean. I love the idea but... This is at least I can do for them."

Garrus noticed the past tense. "Where are they now?"

Her smile was so sad. "Not in this world,"

Someone told him that was another way for humans to say someone's dead. So he didn't ask further. "Sorry."

"It's fine. They're at peace now." For a child, she had a vast vocabulary.

Still, he wasn't sure if he understood her story. Well, perhaps he would ask Shepard later. Thus he turned his attention to the drawing.

There were two names on the sand. Garrus couldn't believe his eyes.

'Lantar Sidonis and Marian White.'

"Sidonis, you know that... him?" He spared the traitor only because Shepard persuaded him. If he ever faced Sidonis again, he wouldn't hesitate to pull the trigger. But this...

"Sid helped me and Mary from the bad guys, those who tried to capture us. He stayed with us for months, until..." Tears shed from her eyes. Butterfly swiped them off quickly. "Sorry. But I don't want to talk about it."

That scum finally cared for someone other than himself? Garrus never thought he would see the day. "I knew Sidonis. We used to work together before he... left."

The girl stared at him with confusion. "He never talked about his past. But, well, I never asked anyway."

If only Garrus knew humans better, he would have noticed Butterfly spoke better than human children at her age.

"He owed me, but it's over now, I think." It sounded like he was talking to himself.

"It is," Butterfly nodded and added, "Uncle."

Uncle? The turian looked at the girl curiously, but finally shrugged. "I like that."

Suddenly, the power went out. Garrus heard a scream not that faraway but not from the girl nearby. Butterfly was calm and quiet.

"This is unexpected," the girl murmured. She turned serious.

Soon, the Commander stormed off the elevator to look for her daughter. She sighed in relief when the girl was in her sights.

"Stay where you are, B," she ordered, "Mom has to check on the AI core."

Butterfly just nodded.

"B? Well, that sounds like Shepard." Most of the humans he knew called their offspring by some lovely name. But the Commander chose to call her daughter with an abbreviation. Not the motherly type, it appeared.

Another two marines came with fire extinguishers. The situation seemed more serious than an ordinary error.

"Don't like fire," Butterfly said.

Garrus agreed with the girl. A fire in a spaceship could be a huge problem.

They waited only for a few minutes before a robot walked off the med bay. The turian wasn't sure what exactly happened so he jumped off the table when that thing strolled across the hall to them. Still, the human child just sat there.

"Butterfly, can I ask you something?" The humanoid robot asked.

"That voice... EDI!" Garrus exclaimed.

"Mr. Vakarian," the synthetic woman greeted.

Butterfly poked a finger on EDI's chest and murmured something. Garrus could catch only a word; "spirits."

Perhaps Sidonis taught her about the turian word. His people didn't love to share their culture with outsiders like asari but it wasn't forbidden. Besides, Sidonis wasn't 'by the rules' type. He did anything he pleased.

But EDI seemed to hear it. "Bless the pure spirit of the newcomer?"

The girl just smiled.

"EDI, what's wrong?" Clueless, Shepard had just left the med bay when she saw them.

"On my way to the bridge, Commander."

The crew stared at her with a mixture of confusion and fear. The Commander almost laughed at the sight of them fleeing out of EDI's way. Understandable, but still amusing.

However, she didn't have much time consider because Butterfly's stomach cried again.

"Now, now B. If you keep that up, I'll think you're a biotic like your dad."

The girl smiled sheepishly as the turian chuckled.

And that reminded Shepard, "Oops, I forgot to introduce you two!"

"No need, Shepard. Your girl can handle herself," Garrus answered, "Just worry about the little one. She looks hungry."

"Oh, yes," the Commander grabbed an apron.

The sharpshooter raised his brow. "I didn't know you could cook." He hated Cerberus, but appreciated the chef they hired. That guy really knew how to cook.

Butterfly tilted her head and gave him a silent 'no'.

"Um, not exactly," the mom didn't notice Butterfly's gesture, still ransacking the cabinets and refrigerator. "There's frozen foods in here, I believe."

'Told you.' Butterfly moved her mouth without talking. Still, she smiled.

Garrus laughed quietly, "I hope Kaidan can cook."

* * *

**As always, thank The Lonely Traveler for beta :D**


	6. Opposite of naive

_Why is a raven like a writing desk?_

- _Mad Hatter_

* * *

**Opposite of Naïve**

* * *

It was a lazy day. James tired of fighting the huge aliens needed to relax. Since the Normandy was lacking in entertainment, he went looking for some form of it, anyway.

'Dancing' with Lola was an excellent form of entertainment, but Butterfly was always making a face when he tried to speak or flirt with the Commander. Every time, their conversation was getting to another level, the little Cockblocker interrupted it. It seemed she was jealous. She even stuck her tongue out at him when Lola wasn't looking.

The dislike was mutual, obviously.

Thinking about it didn't help. Butterfly couldn't go anywhere because soon enough Lola would appear at her side.

Sighing, James opened a bottle of beer and sat down near the shuttle. Not far, Cortez was busy fussing over 'his baby', although there was nothing wrong with it.

"Where did you get that? I thought we were lacking in drinks," the pilot asked.

They escaped Earth in hurry and had to leave the Citadel too soon.

"I found this in the lounge. Want some?"

Cortez shook his head, "No, thanks. I have to stay sober when working on my baby."

"You're no fun," James said. Although he knew why his friend was grieving, he couldn't help but tease Cortez.

The pilot had lost his husband recently. He knew he should move on, or at least try to live his life but it was not easy. "I have works to do, Mr. Vega."

James shrugged and drank the beer. Sadly, it was the worst beer he ever had. "Shit, this beer taste like ass!"

"You tasted ass before?"

Oh, what joy! The subject of his frustration was sitting nearby, and asked him that question. _Wait! Where did she come from?_ James thought.

"No, I never... That's a silly question." James frowned. He knew the girl was up to something.

Butterfly frowned. She seemed serious, but the marine knew she was trolling. "If you don't know how ass taste likes, how could you know the beer tastes like it?"

For once, James didn't know how to form words. He was dumbfounded as Cortez was laughing like mad.

"She has a point, James," the pilot said in between laughing.

Everyone would think what she asked was soooo innocent. But James knew she was trolling him.

_This girl is evil. E-V-I-L!_

Grumbling, the lieutenant wished he stayed in the lounge. That place was one of the few places Butterfly wasn't allowed to enter.

"I'm leaving." And he went to the lounge.

* * *

Joker wouldn't call himself friendly. He talked with everyone in the ship, but he never sought anyone out, never cared if people ignored him.

But just like Shepard, Butterfly was an exception to him.

The pilot looked forward to meeting this little girl since Shepard brought her on board. That day, the girl was sleeping on the Commander's shoulder while moving through the bridge. He saw her face later in the next day and almost couldn't hold his excitement.

Butterfly was Shepard's and Kaidan's. He was rather sure of it despite the impossibility. EDI didn't confirm it for him even though she had access to every record in the ship.

He was still dying of curiosity when his subject of interest came to the cockpit.

Shepard was busy playing peacemaker with those politicians in the war room. Chakwas had an emergency patient who accidentally burned himself while cooking his own lunch. Liara and Garrus had personal business. So, without a babysitter, Butterfly just wandered around the ship as she pleased.

After annoying the lieutenant, she looked for new victim, ah... friend to talk with or annoy.

And she chose to go to the bridge.

"Oh, hello there," Joker greeted as the little Shepard walked into his castle.

He had seen her in the security footage before, but it was different seeing her in the flesh. The girl was a good mix of Kaidan and Shepard. Well, he knew Butterfly couldn't belong to them, but the resemblance was too obvious.

She even smiled like his old friend; the shy and sweet smile that made girl squeal in delight.

At any rate, she would grow up to be a beautiful woman and the Major would have to grow a mustache to chase the horde of men she was going to draw to her like moths to a flame.

He felt sorry for those boys, though. Kaidan was the possessive type and Shepard was a bit overprotective. And as far as he knew, aunt Liara and uncle Garrus would protect her at all costs. Any man who ever dared to hurt her would never get away.

"Hello, Uncle Jeff." Butterfly smiled.

Uncle? Yeah, the whole crew had already become her aunt or uncle, and they loved it.

"Come to chat with the old man? How kind of you."

She even chuckled like Kaidan. Her soft voice was very soothing as she said, "You aren't that old, uncle. Besides, I'm not good at talking."

"You're talking just fine, Butterfly. In fact, most human children at your age are barely learning words. But you are able to speak in full sentences," EDI interrupted.

"She means she isn't a talkative person." Joker wasn't sure if the sexy robot really took it literally or was just joking.

"I'm just messing with you," the AI said.

The helmsman made a face, but Butterfly chuckled. It wasn't surprising, though. As far as he knew, the girl was never angry. Still, she didn't exactly delight either.

"Well, we can sit down and admire the view. These are best seats in the ship. If you promise not to jump or anything, I will let you sit with me," Joker invited. His syndrome was better since Cerberus upgraded him, but his bones were still fragile.

"I promise."

Butterfly carefully climbed to the pilot's chair. On Joker's lap, she was able to see the ocean of stars outside the large window.

"Wow." And that was all she said.

"It would be a lot more amazing when we are flying, especially when we hit the relay," the pilot said in merriment. He didn't notice Butterfly's reaction. "Speaking of which, have you ever seen a relay up close, Butterfly?"

EDI saw the girl's expression turn to something she wasn't able to identify.

"Long time ago," she said.

"Oh?" That was an unexpected response. "Traveled a lot?"

Butterfly smiled again, but it was different. "You have no idea."

They talked a little more until lunchtime. The girl's appetite didn't allow her to linger, she had to get to the kitchen. She asked him before she took leave.

"Would you mind if I stay here sometimes?"

"Of course not. I always enjoy having lovely company. Otherwise I wouldn't require EDI's in my eyesight," the helmsman answered, ignoring the synthetic woman's protest.

Butterfly smiled and pecked his cheek.

* * *

My gratitude to The Lonely Traveler, for being my lovely beta :D


	7. Tangle

_"People see everything through the lens of their obsessions."_

_- Francine Prose,_ _Goldengrove_

* * *

**Tangle**

* * *

Looking in the mirror, Liara touched her scalp crest and sighed.

"Dr. T'soni, do you need anything?" Her assistant droid questioned.

"No, Glyph. I just..."

People said asari were the most gorgeous race in the galaxy. Liara wasn't sure if they were right, but she knew she was always envious of one human feature; their hair.

The scalp crests on asaris' head were semi-flexible. They couldn't dye it or change its style. Human hair had so many colors. They wore their hair in a variety of styles and were able to change them numerous times.

"If I dyed my head... That would be ridiculous," Liara imagined herself with a blond tentacle. It wasn't very attractive.

It didn't look like she could do anything about it. At last, the Shadow Broker stepped away from the mirror frustrated.

"It's five minutes before lunch time," Glyph informed her.

Normally, Liara didn't care much about those schedules but she knew most of the crew would be in the mess hall in this time of day, Butterfly included.

Thinking about the girl made her smile. Her favorite niece had beautiful raven hair that was long, thick, and so soft. Liara could play with it all day and never get bored. Every morning, she would comb and do Butterfly's hair like she saw in old vids from Earth. Twin braids were her favorite so far.

Still grinning, the asari walked to the kitchen just in time. Butterfly was stepping out of the elevator when Liara wrapped an apron around her waist.

"Good afternoon, aunt Liara."

No one knew why, but Butterfly kept calling everyone except Shepard and Chakwas as her aunt or uncle. (She called the good doctor grandma.) At first, the Commander was worried people would find this insulting. However, the crew didn't mind, they let the girl say it.

"Good afternoon, sweetheart. Today aunt Liara learned a new recipe. Want to try it?"

Butterfly tilted her head, hesitating to accept. The asari was a chef-in-training. Sometimes, her cooking ended up in a small disaster.

Still, it was better than Shepard's cooking.

"What's it, Aunty?" She gazed around locating the fire extinguisher. Better to be safe than sorry.

"Human food... Nothing fancy, just an egg and ham sandwich." After her attempt to cook her mother's special recipe had failed, (miserably, Butterfly might add), Liara learned the hard way she should work her way up through difficulty of recipes.

"Sounds harmless enough," Butterfly thought. She was, after all, too polite to say out loud.

She was waiting from a safe distance while Liara sliced the boiled eggs. At least, the asari knew how to chop. Last time Shepard tried to do the same thing, she almost lost her index finger. Garrus said the kitchen looked like a murder scene.

After that, Butterfly had to eat frozen food for days.

"So, where had you been?" Liara tried to make conversation.

"I was just walking around. At first, I went to play with K-9 in the shuttle bay, but Mr. Vega wasn't happy to see me, so I went to the cockpit."

Butterfly said it nonchalantly, but the Shadow Broker took note. James and her had something to discuss.

"The cockpit? What happened there?"

"Uncle Jeff let me sit on his seat." Excitement sparked in her eyes as Butterfly made gestures. "The vista is so beautiful, even better than the starboard observation, and Uncle Jeff said I could go to the cockpit anytime."

Hands that were slicing vegetables paused; Liara remembered what she said to Shepard the other day.

"With regards to EDI's observation, most of the crew believes Butterfly's adopted," she said with concern, "shouldn't we tell them the truth?"

Shepard sighed, "I can't. I trust my crew with my life, but this isn't about trust."

"What do you mean?"

"Just... think about it. Joker is more sensitive than he looks. He blamed himself for my death. How would he react if he knew that lovely girl died because of him?"

The Commander was very thoughtful. Liara continued to speak with the girl.

"That's good to hear. Our pilot never complains, but I think he's lonely sometimes. He sure could use some company." It's hard to imagine anyone not liking Butterfly, Liara thought.

Although Lieutenant Vega might be an exception, Liara considered.

"But Aunty EDI is with him?"

"And is everywhere in the ship. EDI is busy woman, dear. Besides, you can never have enough friends," said Liara as she placed a sandwich in front of little girl.

"You're right, Aunty," Butterfly agreed, "Friends are our strength, hope and family. But sometimes, friendships need 'calibrations'."

"Let me guess. Garrus told you that." That got her every time. Leave it to these two to make her smile. Before the Normandy, she never thought people from different races could become good friends. Good thing she was wrong.

The girl just smiled and ate the sandwich. It wasn't great, but nonetheless, well prepared. Liara did her homework.

"Speaking of which, Uncle Garrus said the krogan leader is mommy's friend. Is that true?"

"You mean Wrex? Yes, he is," Liara smiled at the thought of her big friend, "It's funny when thinking about the old days. Wrex used to... He still is a tough guy, but he's grown up a lot since the Normandy... since he decided to unite his people for the future of the krogans."

She couldn't say it when the Normandy SR-1 went down. That day, after all, was the day mother and child died together in the cold, lonely space.

They both died, but eventually came back.

But Butterfly seemed to notice the lost words. "Why is everyone nervous when talking about the first Normandy?"

The crew didn't know about the other victim of the Normandy SR-1, so they treated Butterfly like any other little girl. Liara knew otherwise.

"I- We lost a lot of good people that day. Most of the names on the memorial wall... They died-"

Butterfly shook her head. "No. They didn't die."

Blinking, the asari was dumbfounded.

"People truly die only when they're forgotten. On the memorial wall aren't only the names, Aunty."

This girl... Liara smiled at the thought. She is really Shepard's daughter.

* * *

Thank The Lonely Traveler, for being lovely beta.


	8. Mist of Confusion

"This life of separateness may be compared to a dream, a phantasm, a bubble, a shadow, a drop of dew, a flash of lightning."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Mist of Confusion**

* * *

Shepard washed her hands for the third time. After touching the Reaper artifacts she took from Cerberus' lab, she felt tainted to the bone, the feeling of uncleanness intensifying.

Sighing, she reached for the towel when she heard the door of her cabin opened.

"Mommy, are you here?" A familiar voice called from outside the bathroom. The commander couldn't help but smile. Her daughter had a beautiful voice, just like her father.

But what time is it? Oh my, is it time for Butterfly to go to bed. How could I forget? "I'm here, B," Shepard finally answered.

The girl didn't reply. Shepard hurriedly dried her hands. Butterfly loved to listen to the Commander's missions as bedtime stories. (Shepard avoided the gory details, of course.)

Looking in her cabinet, the Commander made a face when she found two boxes of thermal clip instead of a toothbrush or other bathroom niceties.

Telling her child war stories, keeping thermal clips in her cabinet, hiding a heavy pistol in the night table and having Reaper artifacts under the bed: what kind of mother was she?

Wait... The Reaper artifacts!

She didn't keep them in the shuttle bay, so she kept them in her cabin until she sent them to the Alliance in the Citadel. Damn, she forgot she didn't live alone anymore. What if those tainted things affected her daughter?

She was the worst mother of all time!

Shepard hurried and left the bathroom. To her surprise, Butterfly was already sleeping.

Her girl was too adorable when she was sleeping. Shepard didn't have the heart to wake her. The commander carefully pulled the two boxes of artifacts out from under her bed, trying not to make noise. The sooner these things were out of her cabin, the better.

Butterfly snored. It was quiet and adorable likes a cat purr. Still, she was thrashing around and mumbling in her sleep. She hadn't slept well since Marian died.

'This isn't looking good.' Shepard thought. 'Perhaps I should bring her to the hospital. They might be able to find out if there's something wrong with her.'

Dr. Chakwas was good but children weren't her expertise. Besides, the damage might be mental. God knows what she'd been through in all those years running. Butterfly, after all, had been hunted by Illusive Man's dogs even before she was born.

'And I have to tell him that the night before Illos and shore leave afterward had a life-changing string attachment.'

The Commander felt her lips arch up by their own accord. The thought of telling him was unnerving but somehow amusing. What would Kaidan say when he found out about his daughter?

* * *

Cortez didn't stop laughing, despite James' dismay.

"Stop it, Esteban," The hunk lieutenant pleaded, "It's not that funny."

The shuttle pilot almost rolled on the shuttle bay floor. "Sure it's funny. You could take a brute down by yourself, but a little, adorable, and innocent girl scares the shit out of you. I can't think of anything more ridiculous."

Good lord, he shouldn't have told anyone about it. Fortunately, only he and Cortez were in the shuttle bay. It could be worse if more people knew. "She does. Butterfly doesn't look like a normal baby. My cousin has three children. They're loud, annoying and kept asking a ton of questions again and again. But Butterfly doesn't. She knows too much, too smart. And then the stuff she reads... How many babies you know read 'eastern philosophy'? That's creepy."

"You know Dr. T'soni would flay you with her mind if she caught you saying that, right?"

James buried his face in his hands. "Not if Lola got to me first. She acts like she's Butterfly's mother. Just between you and me, but I think she is her mother."

"They do look alike, I give you that. But the Commander didn't say anything more than she rescued Butterfly from Cerberus after they killed her family. If the Commander doesn't want to tell us, I don't want to know either," Cortez argued.

The hunk guy moaned, "I know. I know. But I can't stop thinking about her."

Cortez was taken aback. "James, are you...?"

It took James some time to process that question. He almost jumped when he realized its implication. "Hell, no! I'm not a Pedophile. I just... Would I have any chance if Lola has a kid with the Major?"

"You mean Major Alenko?" Cortez saw him briefly after they escaped Earth. But since then, the man got hurt and had to go to the hospital, they hadn't had a chance to talk. Still, Kaidan Alenko was a good looking man. It wasn't easy to forget him.

Speaking of which, now he could see a resemblance.

"Who else? I heard a rumor that they had a thing when they were working together on the Normandy SR-1. That was almost three years ago, and Butterfly's around two years or younger."

"Geeez, Mr. Vega. You're talking like a gossip girl," the pilot really didn't like it. "But that's impossible. Everyone knows the Commander died two years ago. Cerberus resurrected her just recently. How could a dead woman have a baby?"

His friend had a good point. James felt stupid. "Yeah, you're probably right. But Raven is still creepy."

A loud clank interrupted their conversation. James jumped away just in time; two metal boxes missed his feet only by a few inches.

"Sorry I missed," Shepard said in a deadpan tone.

But the Lieutenant knew that voice. She used that tone before she charged a Cerberus' trooper with her biotic. By all means, he was in trouble. "Um, I happen to have something to do... elsewhere. See you later, Lola."

"Lieutenant," the Commander warned coldly. That word alone froze the man in his tracks. "I don't mind if you call me that ridiculous nickname. _BUT_ if I hear you call my Butterfly like that again, you'll have a date with Ms. Airlock. Am I clear?"

Shepard always took care of her crew. Now she would protect her daughter, both physically and mentally. It was mother instinct that commanded her, at that moment.

"Like crystal, Lola," James was a bit crazy himself and he knew it. Still, he loved life. Thus, he wasn't stupid enough to confront Commander Shepard, especially when she was angry.

"Good," Sighed, Shepard held her head for a while before adding, "Butterfly is a baby but she has been through a lot. Cerberus has hunted her before she was born. She has been in hiding for her entire life. Besides, she just lost two people she loved. So, yes, she isn't sunshine and rainbows. She might never be normal, after all."

Guilt kicked his stomach harder than Shepard's fist. He was an ass, James realized. "I'm sorry, Lola."

"Tell that to Butterfly," the Commander grunted before she left.

Cortez carried the two boxes labeled 'Alliance's property' from where Shepard left them and walked away. There was only silence in the shuttle bay for a long time.

* * *

Back in the captain's cabin, the Commander was exhausted. She still couldn't believe anyone would call her beautiful daughter such a cruel word like creepy. Butterfly was a miracle, a precious gift.

And what Cortez said... How could a dead woman have a baby?

She did die... They both died. God...

Losing her grip, Shepard collapsed on the floor, crying quietly in her hands.

_HER_ hands... She chuckled through tears. Every piece of her had been rebuilt by Cerberus. Most of it was synthetic. Was she still a human being? Was she really alive?

And Butterfly... They reproduced her from the cells of the dead embryo.

Were they truly alive?

"Mommy?" Butterfly toddled to her, rubbing her eyes and yawning. The girl sat on Shepard's lap and wiped the tears from her face. "Don't cry. Mary said; if you cried, your tears made the flowers sad."

A smile returned to her lips. Shepard kissed the top of Butterfly's head in deep appreciation.

"You called her Mary? I thought you called her mommy."

"Mary always said she wasn't my mommy. She took care of me for you because you were in big trouble."

Another reason for her to thank that woman. Marian had every right in galaxy to be Butterfly's mother. The woman gave birth to her and raised her.

"Had Mary been good to you, B.? You're so thin."

"She is... was a kind woman." A sad smile was on her lips. "We traveled a lot. Sometimes with transport ships, but we mostly traveled on civilian ships. Mary always told me to stay quiet that we were blending with the crowd and most of people never noticed us. But sometimes..."

"What's wrong?"

Staring at her hands, Butterfly spoke quietly. "The bad guys came, once. They beat Mary to an inch of her life. I thought I'd lost her."

"Oh, dear..." Shepard held her tight, "Mommy's sorry. I should've been there."

"A good guy helped us," the girl continued her story, "a drell. I think his name was Thane Krios."

Thane helped her? Was that a coincidence? "I know him."

Butterfly cocked her eyebrow.

"He helped me in a... mission, sometime ago." Somehow, that little display of expression made her smile. Butterfly really looked like her stubborn daddy.

The girl yawned and snuggled down on Shepard's chest like a cat, mumbling softly, "love you, mommy."

"Mom loves you too, B," Shepard kissed her again.

"What about daddy? Can I meet him?"

That question took the Commander by surprise, though she was rather sure it'd come up sooner or later. "He is... got hurt in his last mission. He is still in the hospital..."

And he might never wake up again.

She bit those words, preventing them from harming the feelings of her hopeful child. "We can always pay him a visit next time we're in Citadel. Mom's sure daddy would love to meet you."

"Is he a good man?" Still falling asleep, but still talking,

A bit of a pain in the ass but... "The second best thing that happened in my life."

"What's the best?"

"You, my dear," Shepard answered, but Butterfly was already asleep.

* * *

My gratitude to The Lonely Traveler, for being lovely beta.


	9. Blue

_"__There is nothing more dreadful than the habit of doubt. Doubt separates people. It is a poison that disintegrates friendships and breaks up relations."_

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Blue**

* * *

With a bottle of Canadian lager in hand, Kaidan Alenko sat on a couch. He smiled as he looked toward the horizon. The view of the English Bay at dusk was beautiful. In this moment, he felt at peace.

Something was amiss, though, the voice in the back of his mind warned. He still had important missions to finish. There was no time to rest.

He had to leave.

"Kaidan," a small body snuggled beside him, distracted him from thought.

The Major smiled as he tightened his arm around Shepard, his Amala; the love of his life. It was so good to have her back after all these years of fighting and anguish.

'Oh, and what 'bout the Reapers?' The voice in his head asked. It sounded like a kid's voice.

They... They'd been defeated.

'How?'

Kaidan stiffened as he realized. He couldn't remember the Reaper War. This wasn't right. How could he forget it?

Then a hand on his chest traveled lower. The sensation distracted him almost completely.

"I need you, love," Shepard whispered hungrily and nipped his earlobe. The familiar spark rushed through his vein, "Stop daydreaming and take me."

Love... When did Amala call him that? Commander Shepard had a silver tongue all right, but she didn't like sweet-talking. Besides, she had never said she loved him, even in the throes of passion.

As fast as he was able, the Major tried to yank himself off Shepard, but her grip was too tight.

"Don't leave me," she pleaded. Her green eyes were dim with sorrow.

'You have been deceived.' The voice warned again. 'This isn't Amala, and you know it. You must leave this place, now.'

"I-I have to..." What was really happening? The last thing he remembered was the pain... His head crushed against something solid. Someone or something was going to kill him and...

'Come back!' The voice was more insistent. 'Mommy needs you._ WE_ need you.'

'Daddy.'

Somehow, that simple but strong word brought him strength. Kaidan finally freed himself from the death grip. In the blink of the eye, the false woman and house disappeared to a reddish mist.

The Major felt the air vibrate by the sound of a horrid voice.

"STUPID HUMAN, THIS IS NOT YOUR VICTORY. SOON, YOU WILL REGRET WAKING UP."

He couldn't move or breathe. That voice sounded inhuman, sent fear rushing through his veins.

'Don't listen to him. He doesn't want you to wake up, because you're mommy's strength. Without you, mommy has nothing to fight for.' The girlish voice whispered.

"Who's there?" Kaidan called, although he could see nothing.

'Soon, daddy. I'll see you soon enough, or at least, as soon as mommy's ready.' The voice sounded further and further away.

"Wait, why? Who're you? What're you?"

But she ignored his confusion. 'No more questions. Just wake up, please.'

White light flashed through the red mist, banishing the horrid air and freeing him from stasis. The last thing Kaidan saw was a blue butterfly flitting around him.

* * *

Slowly and tiredly, Kaidan opened his eyes to see an unfamiliar room. His body was attached to several tubes connected to a big vital machine.

The glass windows showed him the blue sky. With a clouded mind, the Major took some time to recognize the view.

He was in the Citadel.

Although his brain still wasn't fully functional, Kaidan tried to remember his last memory. The last thing he remembered was a robot, pain, and...

... a blue butterfly?

Quietly, the door opened and a familiar woman walked in. It had been sometime since he had last seen her, but the Major still remembered her. "Dr. Michel?"

"Tell me your name." She checked his heart rate. It looked fine.

"Kaidan Alenko."

After asking a couple more questions, Dr. Michel said, "Your memory appears to still be intact, I see." The good doctor smiled. "But don't move yet. Let's me check first." Her Omni-tool flashed to life as she scanned his body. She hummed in approval when she saw the result.

"Marvelous, the swell in your brain has gone down. I suspected it rendered you unconscious, and I was right."

"Where am I? Where's Amala?" Although he wasn't sure if he could fully trust her, Shepard was always in his mind. He knew something bad happened. All he cared about at this moment was her welfare.

"You're at Huerta Memorial Hospital," the doctor informed him, "Do you remember what happened on Mars?"

The Major felt slight pain at the back of his head, but still stubbornly tried to think. "I remember... The crash... Cerberus' robot jumped off the shuttle and... My head was in pain."

"You got serious traumatic head injury. That alone is able to cause amnesia. But don't worry, any lost memories will be return in time."

"But..." He still wondered. "Could it cause strange dreams?"

"Of course, Major. Brain damage could do many things. Did you have a nightmare?" Physically, he was fine, but even the toughest soldier couldn't pass through the war without scars, either physical or mentally. If he had a problem, she wanted to solve it early.

"Not exactly. I just... had a strange dream." Kaidan told her about his dream, but ignored to mention the voice and a blue butterfly.

He didn't want to tell anyone about it.

"That... sounded strange, indeed," Dr. Michel agreed, "Perhaps I ought to call the therapist."

He hated therapists. After BAaT, he had deal with therapists and it never ended well. "Don't bother, Doc. I'll be fine."

Dr. Michel knew better than push him further. "It's your call, Major. Anyway, I suggest you rest. You're not strong enough to do anything and, you implant might have been damaged. So no biotics until we're sure it functions perfectly," she said.

"At least, can I have my Omni-tool?" He had to contact Shepard and his family.

"I'll return it to you after you wake up next time. Anyway, you're not ready for visitors, yet. I'll message Commander Shepard that you woke up."

She knew more than she let on about their relationship.

"Thank, Doc." His cheeks were growing hot. "Umm, by the way, how long I was out?"

"Almost a week, Major. True be told, you had me worried. We couldn't find what kept you unconscious for so long."

She wouldn't believe that the Reapers tried to hold him a prisoner in his dream, Kaidan realized. Well, he didn't believe it either. It sounded like bullshit.

"Did... I have any visitors?"

"Commander Shepard came twice, almost a week ago. She said she would visit again when she had time," the good doctor smiled knowingly. The Commander looked worried when she asked the doctor about his condition. Whatever was between them was more than comradeship.

"Thank you, Doc." He understood her absence. Commander Shepard had a galaxy to save.

His eyelids felt heavy. He could keep them open no longer. Kaidan slowly drifted off to a dreamless slumber as the doctor left the room.

Unknown to them, a nurse outside walked away from the window and sent a message.

'Major Alenko woke up.'

Ping, the answer came quickly. 'Keep your position. Shepard will come for him soon. And she probably will bring the Caterpillar along.'

'Any plan?'

'Already set. The Illusive Man needs that girl at all costs. The agent will be there soon.'

* * *

**Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta.**


	10. Soften Steel

_"When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching- they are your family."_

_- Jim Butcher_

* * *

**Soften Steel**

* * *

Wrex was a krogan battlemaster, bounty hunter, and the leader of clan Urdnot. Hundreds if not, a thousand people, beasts, and monsters had died by his hands. He could handle a band of mercenaries single-handed but he really didn't know how to handle... this.

"Hello," Butterfly waved her hands in front of the mighty krogan. Although the big guy was holding her by her shirt with his big talons, she still smiled and giggled as if she was enjoying swaying in the air.

"This is Shepard's brood, right?" Wrex asked Garrus.

The turian tried to hide his chuckle. "She is as fearless as her mother."

"Or just stupid like her father," In a straightforward tone, the krogan suggested without noticing the girl's frown.

No one was really sure what happened. In just a blink of an eye Wrex found himself on his back. Butterfly was above him headbutting him.

It didn't hurt a bit. And although Butterfly's forehead was bruised, she didn't notice. Instead, she yelled at the battlemaster furiously. "Don't call my daddy stupid!"

"Did she just... use Biotic charge!?" Liara exclaimed.

Garrus' mandibles almost dropped to the floor. He was speechless as Dr. Chakwas spluttered.

"Impossible, human biotics normally doesn't start showing their abilities until they're five or six. But she is... This is too early!"

"She has a gut, I like it!" The krogan laughed, despite his position. "You would make a fine krogan like your mother. Now I know how you broke out from your egg without claws."

"Human doesn't breed like that, Wrex," Dr. Chakwas tried to explain.

As usual, he didn't listen. "Uncle Wrex could teach you to shoot shotguns. Let's go find something or someone to shoot."

But Liara didn't agree. She took the girl from the battlemaster quickly. "She is too young for that, Wrex. The recoil could hurt her. And Shepard would kill you if anything happened to Butterfly."

"Spoilsports," Wrex grumbled.

The Commander stepped out of the elevator to see Garrus trying to help Wrex up. It wasn't an easy task, though. A full-grown krogan in armor could weigh a ton.

"What's happening?" Shepard asked, slightly amused. The battlemaster didn't look so gorgeous in this state.

Garrus' mandibles moved as he tried to suppress the laugh. "This old guy badmouthed Butterfly's daddy, so she charged him with a biotic charge."

"Really? But she is too..."

"-Young. I know. I still can't believe she did it."

After numerous pushes and pulls, the turian finally realized it was useless. "I'll go find some tool in the shuttle bay. A jack might come in handy."

When he left, the mess hall went silent. Wrex felt a little intimidated by Shepard so he tried to smirk.

But she didn't even smile. "Where's my girl?"

"In the med bay. Her forehead is... Doc wants to make sure she didn't suffer any brain damage or something," the battlemaster replied.

She couldn't believe Hackett was right. "Let's me guess. She headbutted you."

"Not hard but she did it right. Use the hardest part of the forehead, not the entire face. Did you teach her?" Wrex asked, sounding hopeful.

Grabbing his hand, Shepard laughed as she finally helped him get up. "That taught you to not mess with the Shepards'."

"Shepard? I thought she was Alenko's."

Hands pulling him lost their grip causing the Krogan to fall back to the floor.

"She is mine." Hands on her hips, the Commander protested.

"Come on. Even I know what you were up to. The walls and floor of your cabin back in the Normandy SR1 weren't so thick. And you both couldn't keep your hands off each other," Wrex teased.

Cheeks red like a tomato, Shepard wanted to yell but Butterfly came out of the med bay. No matter how badass she was, she would behave in front of her daughter. She had to shut up.

"What? I didn't know the great Commander Shepard didn't curse in front of her daughter." The krogan rolled his body and finally stood up. It was hard for his kind to get up when lying on their back, but not impossible.

Truth be told, he stayed on the floor to troll Garrus.

"You don't know a thing about parenting," Shepard snapped.

"Give me some advice. I might need a tip or two if the genophage's cured," the big guy asked nicely.

"You really believe a cure is possible?"

"The females survived the test. I know it won't be easy but they're the best chance for the krogans."

Shepard had doubts. "The test they passed through... It was brutal. I saw a lot of their bodies in that lab on Tuchanka. How could they survive long enough for the salarian STG to find them?"

"You saw the vid I got from my inside source. They're still alive. Those pyjacks stole them from Tuchanka and are holding them captive." Wrex began to raise his voice. After all, he was still a krogan. "I want them back, or Palaven could burn for all I care."

The turians needed the krogan army to help them retake their homeworld. Wrex took advantage of the situation by demanding a cure for the genophage in exchange for the troops. The Primarch, desperate from losing his home and men, agreed but the salarian leader, Dalatress didn't. She feared a repetition of the krogan rebellions and Shepard didn't think she was being unreasonable.

"Easy, Wrex. I didn't say I wouldn't help you. I just don't want to see you miserable if something happens." Dalatress was right about one thing; the krogans had hot tempers. The Commander had to calm him down.

"Me... Miserable? Come on, this parenting businesses softened you. Better find some ass for you to kick before you turn into mommy of the year. Wait... When was the last time you got laid? You looked quite effective after..."

Shepard covered Butterfly's ears with her hands. "Stop right there, old man. Your dirty mouth is corrupting my girl."

Wrex made a funny noise. "Women."

Before their conversation went any further, EDI interrupted.

"ETA Sur'Kesh in fifty minutes, Shepard."

And then, the battlemaster forgot everything else. "Ha, finally! Let's go down there, Shepard."

"Alright," She rolled her eyes before kneeled down to talk to Butterfly. "Be a good girl and stay with Chakwas. If I can, mommy will bring you a souvenir or something... if we have time, of course."

Whisky-brown eyes blinked. "Have we ever had enough time, mommy?"

That question was simple and innocent, but somehow it felt like she was implying something more.

"I don't know B, but I will do my best to make time."

* * *

**Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta.**


	11. Everybody has secrets

'_Goodbye,' said the fox. 'And now here is my secret, a very simple secret. It is only with the heart that one can see rightly. What is essential is invisible to the eye.'_

_- Antoine de Saint-Exupery,__The Little Prince_

* * *

**Everybody has Secrets**

* * *

The lady of luck was on his side. At least, James believed it was luck.

Out of the blue, Diana Allers came to see him at his station in the shuttle bay. The reporter leaned on the counter. She was so close; he could see she was 'all natural' beneath her tight dress.

"So..." The reporter leaned closer, giving James an eyeful of her cleavage. "Commander Shepard and her team went for a mission, right?"

In this moment, the shuttle bay was almost deserted since Cortez was their shuttle pilot. The big guy couldn't help but think dirty thoughts.

"We're alone." Allers teased seductively. "Can I ask you about something... secretly?"

"Anything you want, señorita. Um, except Alliance secrets, I'm afraid."

She giggled, tilted her head to one side and the V-neck above her breasts accidentally slid further down. "I know the protocol, soldier. Trust me. I won't ask anything about the Alliance."

James wasn't an idiot. He saw what was coming. "Ask away, señorita, I'm all ears."

"Well, just between you and me, have you wondered about Butterfly? I mean; she and the Commander look alike. Could it be possible they're related?"

The life of the hero of Elysium was in the spotlight since she was awarded the Star of Terra. Still, most of the details of her life were classified. The few details known were she was an Earthborn but no one knew about her family.

"So, you just came here to ask that question?" Perhaps he shouldn't have been surprised. James knew he was charming but this kind of woman would never flirt with anyone without a reason. Sultry smile, sweet words, and that curvy body of hers were presented to him only for her benefit.

"Maybe or maybe not," Allers wore her poker face well.

_Two can play this game,_ he thought. "Commander Shepard is my superior officer, señorita..."

"But, we're just talking." She was more insistent although still speaking in her flirting tone. "Anything you say will never leave this room, I swear."

She didn't bring her bot, but it didn't mean she wouldn't able to record his words. "What do you want to know, señorita? I know as much as everyone else knows. It would be a lot easier if you ask Commander Shepard, herself."

"Last time I asked her about Butterfly, she told me to shut up or she would throw me out the airlock."

The Commander didn't want any outsider to know about Butterfly's existence. If Allers hadn't had permission to stay on the ship before Shepard came back with the girl, she might had never been allowed on the ship.

"Unfortunately, I can't help you."

Allers pouted. This guy was tough, but she wouldn't give up so easily. "You can give me your opinion, right? Speak your mind, and I'll buy you a drink next time we're in the Citadel."

"It sounds like you're trying to get a scoop. Do you realize we are keeping her safe from Cerberus?"

The reporter was shocked. She was about to say something, but changed her mind. "Really? What does the terrorist organization want from a baby?"

"I honestly don't know." Hell, he didn't even want to know. He felt bad enough after Shepard's lecture. Somehow, he feared it would have been worse if he'd known more about Butterfly's tragedy.

"Well, that's too bad." Her apology seemed sincere enough. "Anyway, are you still interested in the drink? I have some wine in my footlocker, and I don't want to drink alone."

Not his favorite drink but good enough. James didn't waste any time to accept. "Lead the way, señorita."

* * *

Later, James was lying on Allers' bed, asleep. He didn't even stir as the reporter left his side. After making sure her one-night stand was still in deep sleep, she typed a message.

'We have a problem. I think we should abort Butterfly's scoop.'

Her producer sent the message back after a few minutes. 'What? But we set everything up for the scoop. What's your problem?'

'Cerberus is after her, so Shepard kept her secret for her safety. If the Commander knew I leaked Butterfly's location to you, she would kill me for sure. Wait, did you tell anyone?'

'Of course, I told our team and our sponsors about the girl on the Normandy. They liked the picture you took. She really looks like Commander Shepard. Although, I agree we better drop the scoop if it means your life and our show's safety.'

_That almost brought tears to her eyes._ Allers rolled her eyes. 'I hope the information never leaks to Cerberus. From my source, Cerberus killed Butterfly's entire family. I'm not heartless enough to sell her out for a scoop. No matter how big it is.'

'Sure, Allers. Her secret is safe with us.'

'Good to know. Goodbye.' She logged out before returning to the bed.

After she fell asleep, her bedmate got up. The man felt bad for what he'd done.

She used him, and he knew it. Still, he couldn't blame her because he also used her, as well. It was only two people searching for comfort in each other's arms. Well, alcohol encouraged them but it didn't matter.

James didn't believe in love because of his life experiences. His mother thought her husband was her prince, but he was nothing but a cheating bastard. James knew it all along, but kept the secret to himself, for the woman's sake. In the end, his mother died of an illness without knowing the truth. It seemed like a good idea then, but in hindsight, he wasn't sure.

Getting dressed, James didn't bother to hack Allers' comm for the info she sent. He wasn't good at tech, anyway. Besides, it was easier if he just asked EDI for the log. The synthetic woman would be glad to help him because she too, had fallen in love with Butterfly.

Heck, everybody except him and Allers had fallen in love with that girl!

What made her so beloved? Her big whisky-brown eyes, her smile, or her innocence, what was the weapon she had that everyone fell in love with her?

The Shepards were similar. They were strong yet fragile. Like eggs they were tough on the outside, however had soft and sad spirits.

Maybe, the true answer was simple. Everybody has a hole in his or her souls. And somehow Butterfly managed to heal some of the crews' holes. She might able to help him as well, if only he let her.

_No._ The big guy shook his head. He was being absurd again.

* * *

It didn't take long for James to leave Allers' room. Shepard and her team still hadn't come back. He then stopped at the mess hall to eat.

At the mess table, Specialist Traynor was playing chess with Butterfly. It was strange to see the chess master sweating and frowning while the baby was humming a tune in enjoyment.

"What's happening here?" His curiosity got the best of him. He asked innocently but the woman shot him a dagger glare.

"I'm thinking. Please don't interrupt."

"Are you losing?" But her opponent was a baby?

"No!" Traynor exclaimed a little too harsh. She was very upset. "I just... am thinking about my next move. I lost most of my pieces but I still..."

She grabbed her Bishop, but Butterfly shook her head. And after rethinking twice, the specialist saw her mistake.

"I have been defeated!" Well, she didn't always win but... "By a baby,"

The truth hurt.

Could it be any creepier? The little Shepard beat the chess master in her own game. Was this what the Commander mean when she said, Butterfly wasn't a normal child?

James had no time to ponder. Specialist Traynor ran from the table, crying like a big baby, and left him alone with a bewildered Butterfly.

"Have I done anything wrong?" The girl asked, really confused.

The lieutenant could think of a few things, but if he spoke, Shepard would throw him out the airlock. "Nope, it just... Women with self-confidence are never happy to be defeated." _Especially, by a baby_, he added.

Butterfly nodded hesitantly. "Perhaps you're right, Mr. Vega."

"Mr. Vega?" Sounded too formal. Does that mean he was not part of her family?

"Aye, that's your name. What's wrong?" Her confusion seemed sincere. Even though, James thought she was a sly little thing, sometimes she was really naive.

"Nothing," and then an awkward silence ensued.

Butterfly swung her legs on the chair. It seemed she was thinking about what she was going to do.

Well, he owed her an apology, right? Better do it before he lost the nerve. "I- Where did you learn to play chess?" Alas, he couldn't say it. Sorry seemed to be the hardest word to say and mean.

"In my journey," The little one seemed hesitate to answer. She didn't trust him. "Sometimes, we spent a lot of time in ships. Mary and I would play chess to kill the time. We used to have a set made from granite, but the bad guy destroyed it."

Finally, the hulk soldier realized he knew nothing about the girl.

_She had been hunted for her entire life._ Shepard's words hit James' gut. What kind of monster hunts a baby?

And what kind of guy judged her blindly?

"I'm sorry." He blurred out.

Brown eyes went wide. Butterfly wanted to ask what he meant, but James walked out before she could say anything.

The elevator door slid closed. The lieutenant sighed as he held his head in confusion. He didn't know why he had no balls to tell her about the conversation between him and her mom last night.

Despite everything, she still scared him. And that was his secret.

Everybody has secrets.

* * *

Oh, my. We finished rewrite the story, and now we're going to upload more chapters. I'm waaay very excited. XD

Anyway, I couldn't do it without you, The Lonely Traveler. Let's me give you a hug.


	12. Wish

Umm, no. This story wasn't on delay. The Lonely Traveler and I, we're busy rewriting it. I'm not sure if shows the change, but well, to be safe, I assume it's not. So I'll announce it again.

"Now, the Butterfly's dream had been rewritten with the help from my beta: The Lonely Traveler. Her work is amazing. Thank a lot dear."

Please enjoy the story.

* * *

"Life can be everything you wish. Well, of course, if you stop wishing and do something about it."

_- Anonymous_

* * *

**Wish**

* * *

Later that night, Shepard returned sore. After a long day of fighting Cerberus troops, it had exhausted her squadmates and herself to the bone.

The mission was accomplished, but somehow she didn't feel like they had won. The Cerberus' dogs came to the salarian STG base. They did much damage, killed many good people just to eliminate the female krogan. What did they want and how did they know she was there?

Shepard didn't think she could sleep well unless she knew the answer. She hated that the Illusive Man always knew where she was and what she was doing. What if he had known that Butterfly was on the Normandy and had plans to kidnap her?

Everyone on the Normandy would protect Butterfly, she knew it, but she really didn't want to risk it. Her crew and her daughter were all too important.

Garrus was right, working herself to the bone wouldn't help anyone. She wanted nothing more but to crawl into her bed and get a goodnight's rest.

Stepping out from the elevator, Shepard headed to her cabin's door as she heard Butterfly's voice.

"It's awful."

On the other side of the door, her little girl was talking with someone. But who? EDI said the girl had been alone for hours. Besides, she didn't hear another voice.

Butterfly sounded sad. "I can't believe..."

Hesitating, Shepard kept listening.

"It's too much. Too many people died protecting me, I'm not even worth saving."

_That's not true, my dear_. Shepard protested in her mind. _You're precious to me. Without you or your dad, I have no reason to fight._

"I know I owe them. And I always pay my debts."

That sounded serious. No longer able to suppress her curiosity; the Commander opened the door quickly.

The girl was alone on the bed. There was no one else, except for the little creature on her shoulder, a hamster.

"Kai..." She stopped herself just in time. "You're talking to a hamster, B?"

Butterfly blushed, in response.

Liara was right about one thing: Butterfly's puppy eyes were adorable. Her reddened cheeks made them more beautiful. Shepard didn't have the heart to tease her more.

"I thought I lost him. Where did you find this guy?" The mother changed the subject.

"Engineer Adams found him." Just like her daddy, Butterfly wasn't a talker, especially when she was embarrassed.

_And Adams gave the space hamster to a girl who hadn't had any toys in her life,_ Shepard assumed. She was ashamed not thinking about it before. Butterfly came to the Normandy with nothing but her old clothes and she'd never asked for anything. In fact, it looked like she feared to make demands even for food.

_What kind of life have you had, my child?_

"So," The Commander continued, "I think he is yours now. But he is still in need of a home. That cage is perfect if we clean it up. Will you help mommy?"

"Yes, I'll help. But aren't you busy?"

"I just finished helping uncle Wrex rescue his... friend. Eve is sick, she has to stay in the med bay, and Dr. Mordin is taking care of her. Speaking of which, you might have to find another place to spend time in, at least until Eve is better, especially if you want to take Kaidan with you." Shepard tried to pat the hamster, but he turned hostile, trying to bite her hand.

Perhaps she shouldn't have named him Kaidan. He didn't trust her just like human Kaidan.

Butterfly whistled, and the hamster stopped trying to bite the Commander and snuggled against the side of her face. The bloody annoying rodent took to her like a charm.

_Betrayer,_ Shepard thought angrily. She had fed him and cleaned his house, and that's how he repaid her, biting her.

"Animals are always attracted to me." The girl spoke nonchalantly.

And that stopped her mother from planning to punish the space hamster. "That's good. Ah, I mean... Some articles say it's a good thing to have a pet, although some of mine haven't survived."

Her fish tank was nearly empty. The fishes just kept dying because Shepard always forgot to feed them. Thanks to the feeding VI device she installed, it saved the rest.

Butterfly didn't say anything. She used her biotics to lift the hamster's cage from the shelf. It landed on her hands perfectly.

Shepard couldn't do it herself. She remembered Kaidan did it many times, but Butterfly made it look very easy. She was only a baby and didn't have an implant, yet. How powerful would she be when she was older and implanted?

The more important question, where did she learn to control her biotics?

"An asari," Butterfly answered, making Shepard realize she thought too loud. "Can't remember where, but she helped us from a bad asari. I saw them fight, and..."

"You learned from watching them fight?"

Brown eyes full of concern. Butterfly seemed to think she was in trouble. "Is that a bad thing?"

"Of course not." It wasn't exactly true, but she didn't want to worry her daughter. Butterfly shouldn't be blamed for her ability. Cerberus had a hand in her development, after all. "It's just... unexpected. You never told me you could do that."

"Sorry. I didn't think..." The last part of the sentence was lost in a slur. Her shoulders slumped as she kept looking at the floor.

"It's alright. We haven't had much time to talk anyway." Shepard tried to reassure her. Though she hated to admit, it seemed James was right. Butterfly's intelligence could be creepy sometimes.

That thought was for another time, she decided. She was wasting precious time with her daughter. "This cage needs to be cleaned. Let's start with the water and food bowls."

Butterfly did as she was told. She was on the stool, washing the bowls in the bathroom sink while Shepard cleaned the cage on the counter nearby. However, working in silence made the task awkward. The Commander tried to make conversation.

"So, what happened when I wasn't here?"

"Mr. Vega apologized to me. But I don't understand why he did. I can't remember him doing anything wrong."

_That's because you're too kind, B._ Shepard thought bitterly. "If he apologized, it meant he'd done something wrong and felt sorry."

Butterfly didn't understand. "But why didn't he tell me what he had done? He just said: I'm sorry, and left before I could ask him."

That guy looked tough, but he just talked the walk. Still, she couldn't tell her daughter the reason for the apology. "It was probably because he felt terrible telling you. And asking him would hurt his feeling. I think we better drop it."

The girl was deep in thought but still rubbing the bowl.

Silence. They didn't say anything until Butterfly asked, "What happened down there? Mommy, you look tired."

_A giant mech almost ran me over._ She thought. "Bad guys tried to overrun the STG base. But everything is under control now. We won and Eve was saved."

"Eve is uncle Wrex's friend, right? Is she a krogan?"

Butterfly and Marian traveled a lot, so it wasn't strange that she knew about a lot of species and didn't fear aliens. "Yes, she is. But she has... She is sick."

It wasn't exactly a lie. Shepard just didn't know how to explain about the genophage and their intent to cure it, deciding to keep her story short and simple.

"So Doctor has to treat her. I won't interrupt their work, I promise."

She had a feeling Butterfly knew more about the situation. She had forgotten Wrex had spoken to Butterfly about the genophage. Butterfly's mind was as sharp as a steel trap, so she probably put this and that together, and knew of their intentions. Shepard changed the subject.

"Um, we're heading to Citadel. Would you like it if we had lunch or went shopping together? Have you ever gone shopping, B?"

Excitement sparkled in those brown eyes, but suddenly disappeared, and she said, "Long time ago."

_Stupid Amala._ Shepard berated herself. Why did you have to remind her of her hard life? "Then, what do you want to buy?"

"Nothing," Butterfly shook her head. "I just want to see daddy."

Looking at the girl, Shepard felt her heart breaking. It sounded selfish, really. But she wanted to be Butterfly's most important person. "B, I understand you want to see him but... Care to tell me why?"

Brown eyes went wide with confusion. Was her intention hard to understand? "I want to have a family."

Those words stabbed at her heart. The Commander opened her mouth, tried to say something but the words died before they came out.

"Mary said I am special, and that's why bad guys are after me. If I was normal, she and Sid might still be alive." A baby should be optimistic and gleeful, but Butterfly always looked gloomy. Her abilities were curses, not gifts. "If I had family like the other kids, I might become normal."

Was that what she wanted for her entire life, too? As an orphan, Amala wanted to be loved. Kaidan was only one who ever gave her that love. How could she dismiss Butterfly's identical wish?

"Alright, we'll go see him together. He just sent me a message recently. His doc said he is ready for visitors."

Butterfly leaped into her arms. Shepard dropped the cage to catch her in time. The laugh ringing inside the small room as they held each other tight.

"Thank you, mommy." The girl kissed her mother's cheek in excitement as she laughed.

Realizing this was the first time she had heard Butterfly laughing out loud, Shepard tightened her arms around the little frame, feeling like everything was going to be all right.

After all, how could it possibly go wrong?

* * *

Unless you have mean writer, dear. \evil laugh


	13. Darkness that you carry

Warning: There's implication of child abuse in this chapter.

* * *

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened."

_- Dr. Seuss._

* * *

**Darkness that You Carry**

* * *

An item has many meanings. For the rest of galaxy, the genophage was their salvation. But for the krogans, it was a curse, and cause for their almost extinction.

Since the virus had infected the krogans of Tuchanka, their fate had been sealed. God knows how many broods died before they ever had a chance to see the world. There was no more laughter of the young to light their beacon of hope. The darkness in their hearts engulfed everything.

She still remembered the pain in her heart as she held her lifeless firstborn. The boy never drew breath, and she never named him. She had forgotten his face, but the pain was still there.

The wound healed, but the scar remained. She gave her name away and turned to the path of female shaman after that day. It wasn't easy, however. They caged the initiate within a dark cave for the ritual. She had only two options; find her way out, or die.

With her claws and a small crystal, she dug her way out of the darkness and her old life. She became smarter, stronger, and calmer.

At last, she believed she was all those traits.

"Morning," Mordin greeted. He had stood in front of his working table all night long. The salarian had not moved from that spot since he came aboard the Normandy.

"Morning Doctor," She returned the gesture. Her people didn't trust this race, but this one was different.

The doctor seemed worried. "Lack of sleep. Unsteady pulse. Sign of fever."

"I'm fine, Mordin." Despite her coldness, the krogan appreciated his concern. Most of her friends and sisters died in Maelon's experiment, she almost had no people who cared for her.

Commander Shepard did care for her. Might even become friends.

"Still early." Nothing stopped the hyperactive doctor from taking care of his patient. "Should sleep more."

_And go back to her nightmare? No, thanks._"I'm done resting, doctor."

"Pain?" Mordin ran an analysis program in his Omni-tool. His fingers danced wildly among the bright interface. "Suggest mild pain-killer. Small dose. Eases stress."

She doubted it. "It isn't that kind of pain."

In his line of work, Mordin was a genius. But when it came to more delicate matters, he was a bit dense. "Will scan deeper, then."

Sighing, she let him do as he pleased. It was odd when she thought about the conflict between their races. The salarians created the genophage that killed her children. But instead of blinding hate, she trusted this salarian.

It wasn't like this when they first met. She was frightened after waking up in an unfamiliar place and the last thing she remembered was the escape from the mad scientist's lab. As limp and sick as she was, she managed to break her captor's arm and tried to escape.

The STG team was going to shoot her down, but Mordin stepped forward. There was something in this salarian that made her trust him. When he offered her help, she just said: "please."

The med bay's door opened. No need to look up, she knew it was Wrex since she heard the heavy footsteps. He was only male krogan on board right now, after all.

But it wasn't just him. The battlemaster brought a small human and a turian along.

"Mommy won't like this." The little human on his shoulder protested with a small voice.

"Nah, I just want to introduce you to Aunty Eve." The big guy shrugged. That movement almost sent the girl flying off his shoulder.

"Be careful." Garrus almost jumped. He was worried but Wrex didn't listen to his warning. He was following them so he would be able to catch Butterfly if she fell. "Butterfly has no scales. She will break if she falls down."

"Nonsense! The Shepards' are tougher than they look. Stop treating her like a helpless creature." Either he was sure of Butterfly's strength or too ignorant. However, he carefully placed her down near the female krogan.

Brown eyes stared at the big woman thoughtfully. She was probably wondering about the differences between female and male krogans.

"Butterfly, this is Eve. Eve, this is Butterfly. She is Shepard's brood."

Most of her life, Eve lived on Tuchanka. She had never seen a human child before. The one before her seemed so soft and fragile.

_Would she break if I touched her?_ The krogan wondered.

While Eve was thinking, Butterfly reached for her claw. The girl smiled as she said. "Nice to meet you."

The human child's hands were so tiny. Eve could break them in several pieces with a simple touch. But they were so warm, so soft, and so... alive.

Her stillborn son was soft too, but also cold and lifeless. Carefully, Eve touched her cheeks as if they were the most delicate flower. She was a mother once, so she knew how important this girl was for her mother.

Her mind remembered the day she volunteered for Maelon's experiment. It wasn't for the good of the krogans that drove her into the barbaric experiment, but her needs.

She needed to be mother. She wanted to hold her children in her arms, to feel their heartbeat. With that, the hollow part of her heart might be filled.

Butterfly smiled as she snuggled into Eve's claws. "Aunty Eve smells nice."

What? "I- I haven't had a bath for some time. I think I..." She was sputtering? She never sputtered before.

"Smells like a mother," Butterfly's smile was bright like sunshine.

And Eve felt her heart dropped. Now she knew why everyone was attached to this little Shepard. "Oh, my dear... You are too kind."

Unnoticed by the two, Mordin sat on his knees to study the girl closely. His big eyes almost didn't blink while he was staring at Butterfly's face. And without warning, he lifted the hem of her oversized shirt up...

* * *

James was about to pour coffee into his mug when he heard a scream from the med bay. Instantly, he dropped it and ran to the source of screaming. He wasn't sure what was happening but he was rather sure that was Butterfly.

She sounded so scared. This couldn't be good.

The door hissed open and Butterfly ran off. She ran into James who kneeled down to hug her without thinking. The girl was weeping hard, frightened. Perhaps she was too frightened to care that she was in his arms, so she clung onto him as if he was her protector.

The room was a mess. Garrus was trying to stop the raging krogan who now was suffocating the very violet salarian. The female krogan ran after Butterfly but she was still too weak, so she had to pause half way.

"What on earth is happening?" The human asked.

"Let... me... explain." Mordin spoke despite his lack of air.

"Let him speak for himself, Wrex. I'll help you slay him later if he can't give us a good reason to let him live." The turian tried to reason.

If it was him in the old days, Wrex would had beat the shit out of this stinky salarian for making his niece cry. However, he grew up enough to be reasonable.

He hated to admit, but he needed this scientist for the genophage cure. Duty came first. The battlemaster loosened his grip on Mordin's neck.

"Then talk. Why did you lift Butterfly's shirt up?"

"He did what?" Shocked, James held the girl tighter. "Why would he do that?"

Wait! His face twisted in horror. Butterfly did say something about the bad guys before. Had they...? Just thinking about it made James sick. How could anyone ever abuse a baby?

Unconsciously, the lieutenant tightened his embrace.

"Familiar. Checking. Confirm." Mordin spoke quickly. "Met her before. Actually, delivered her."

"What?" The Commander herself walked into the med bay. Her attire and hair were messy. It seemed she had just left her bed. EDI had informed her of the situation, so she came as soon as possible. She just came in time to hear Mordin's last words.

"Mommy!" Butterfly cried and left James for the older Shepard.

Everyone shot a dagger glare to Mordin, but he was still calm, well as much salarians knew the definition of it. He turned his Omni-tool on to search for something. A few minutes later, he showed them a picture of a tiny newborn.

"Birthmark on belly. Same name. The same girl. Mother's name: Marian White."

"Can you start from the beginning?" Shepard asked. If he knew Marian, he would speak the truth.

The air felt lighter. Mordin cleared his throat before continuing. "A year, six months and three days ago. Marian White came to clinic. Emergency delivery. Born early. Had to keep the child in the tank."

That's why Butterfly was so small.

"Odd thing. Mother and child's DNA didn't match." Salarians were a nosy race. Mordin would never stop thinking about it until he got a satisfying answer.

"So, you just... wanted to see her birthmark?" James carefully asked. He wasn't a scientist but he knew children got genes from their parents. So the mother and the child's DNA always match. The things Mordin said didn't sound plausible.

"On that, I can explain." Secrets never lasted. Perhaps she ought to speak the truth. "But not now." She wasn't sure if Butterfly knew of her own origin. Still, Shepard couldn't say it in front of the girl.

"Commander?" Eve could see the human was considering something.

"I... Butterfly and I need to talk." She had to know what made the girl so frightened. Neither Wrex's fangs nor Garrus' scar scared Butterfly. Whatever made her scared must be terrifying.

For once, the hyper alien didn't say a thing. Mordin kept his mouth shut as the mother and child left the room.

* * *

About two and half hours later, Eve was standing outside the shuttle bay. The place was deserted because the Commander wanted to be alone.

EDI made sure the CO didn't do anything stupid. Still, the sounds from the inside made the crew worry.

After her 'chitchat' with Butterfly, Shepard was beyond angry. She chased everyone out of the shuttle bay with her murderous glare, Cortez and James included. Although they were worried, no one dared to comfort her.

Still, someone had to do something.

"Commander?" The krogan looked around. Crates and other items were scattered around in disorder.

On the floor, Shepard was sitting with arms around her knees. Her shoulders were shaking hard.

"Eve?" Her voice was harsh. There were no evidence of tears but her eyes were red. Shepard was trying to control herself.

Eve couldn't ask: are you alright? Because she knew the Commander wasn't alright. Shepard was going to break, just like many of female krogans that lost their children.

But Butterfly wasn't lost.

"She is still here." Eve sat down near her friend who was staring at the floor.

That got Shepard. She looked up to see the krogan. "What do you mean?"

"I saw a lot of friends break after they lost their children. Some just left to find their end in the desert. But Butterfly isn't lost."

"I know." Shepard bit her lip. "But it still... She's my daughter, although Cerberus cloned her and planted her in another woman's womb. When I think about what she went through..."

Eve waited patiently.

"For a year, Marian White kept her safe from Cerberus. But, about six months ago, the ship they took was captured by a group of batarians. Most of passengers were enslaved or killed."

She could see where this was going. Still, Eve kept listening.

"I don't know how, but they knew Butterfly is mine. They... They wanted to take revenge because I destroyed the Bahak system. So they..." No longer bearing it, Shepard burst into tears. "They put a control device on her! She still has a scar but I hadn't seen it because it was hidden beneath her hair."

The control device had a tooth that attached directly with the wearer's brain. If the slave disobeyed, the master pushed the button and then the slave would be shocked to death or worse. Shepard had some idea about the pain. No doubt, the pain must be worse for a baby. Butterfly was lucky enough to survive, but the scar remained.

"The worst part is one of those bastards ripped her clothes off... I'm not sure if it was good or bad that she was too innocent to understand his intention."

God, she wanted nothing more than to protect Butterfly.

Eve couldn't say a word. She patted Shepard's shoulder in understanding. Women knew the horrors of being abused.

"Dr. Chakwas told me that Butterfly's maidenhead's still intact. The bastard didn't succeed. Thank god." Still, it made her sick. If she had known who that sicko was, she would kill him, slowly and painfully.

"Butterfly couldn't remember much because the pain from the control device rendered her unconscious. When she woke up again, the ship had landed on Irune. There was no one in the ship but her and Marian. They tried to contact Thane but another group of mercenaries found them. Fortunately, Sidonis helped them escape."

Shepard tried to breath slower and deeper. The more she talked, the more the pain in her chest became unbearable.

"You didn't know..."

"I know! But it still... She almost died because of me. If she was someone else's, she might never..."

No longer pretending, Shepard cried on Eve's shoulder. The krogan patted her like a sister trying to comfort the other. It was a while before Eve finally got over the silence.

"I killed my children." She waited for Shepard's attention before continuing. "I knew I had been infected. Any egg I laid would never hatch. But I still tried. In a sense, I killed them."

It was Shepard's turn to keep quiet.

"Life is always full of choices, but sometimes, we have no choice at all." Shepard, of all people, had known that too well. "I don't know what happened when the Bahak system was destroyed, but I believe in you, Commander."

"Thank you, Eve." She hoped Kaidan would say that.

"Whatever is lost is lost. The most important is what that still remains. Butterfly is still here. You must stay strong for her, Commander," Eve said softly like an older sister.

She was right. Shepard had to admit. Although it still felt bad, the pain became more bearable.

"Thank you, Eve. You have no idea how appreciate you being here." The Commander gave the krogan a bear hug.

"I should be the one with the appreciation." Despite the shawl she wore, Shepard thought Eve was blushing. "You know. My children never drew a breath, so no one had ever called me mother. But Butterfly... She is very kind."

"Yeah, I know what you mean." Nothing pleased a mother more than when she knew her child was beloved. "Welcome to the family."

"It would be a very strange family if it included uncle Wrex." Although she said that, Eve's eyes grew softer, when she mentioned his name.

If the genophage were cured, Wrex would marry Eve. With his strength and her wit, the future of the krogans was brighter than ever.

Still, it was the battlemaster who talked about marriage. Shepard didn't know Eve's opinion yet.

"What do you think of Wrex?" The Commander asked.

"He is... smarter and more reasonable than other krogans. But you can't tell him I said that. His head is big enough already." The female krogan didn't look so serious, though. "And he... brought Butterfly to me. I still can't believe it, but I think he tried to comfort me. Krogans would not do such a thing. That old man is a mutant. You can tell him that."

Tears still shed, but Shepard laughed. It was different kind of tears, however. "Oh, you and he will make great leaders."

The future was uncertain. Eve was interested in curing the genophage first. "One step at a time. First, we need our Commander back. Stand up, and keep strong, Shepard."

After a moment, she added, "And you might want to wash your face."

* * *

Honestly, I had hard time writing this chapter. I rewritten for several time until I thought it's good but The Lonely Traveler made it flawless. You're amazing. XD

Anyway, I apologized that I didn't answer every comments. I'm a bit busy sometime and my internet connection is a bitch. Please believe me, dear readers. I appreciate every comment, because I know you wouldn't write them if you didn't care. Thank you so much.


	14. Stray

"It is a man's own mind, not his enemy or foe that lures him to evil ways."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Stray**

* * *

After everything she had gone through, Shepard rarely got a goodnight's rest. Most of her nights had been peaceful since Butterfly came into her life. No one but Kaidan ever made her feel safe like this. Perhaps, the girl really was a gift.

Yesterday felt unreal when she thought about it. No gossip, no questions. Everyone acted like it never happened. Mordin apologized and Butterfly accepted. After that, the nosy doctor became her grandpa.

She was the 'forgive and forget' type. Perhaps that was something she got after Marian, since neither Shepard nor Kaidan had such an attitude. Well, they could forgive, but not forget.

Shepard decided it was better to tell the truth. Now, everyone on the Normandy knew Butterfly's origin. Still, it was like Shepard feared. Joker took it hard. He was quiet until Butterfly talked to him.

She hadn't known what happened in the cockpit, but Butterfly came back with a smile and the pilot was more cheerful.

That was something she got from her mother.

Morning came and Shepard woke up to find her bed empty. Her little girl had left the cabin very early.

Fifty minutes later, Shepard found herself in the mess hall. Someone had already brewed coffee and she very grateful for that.

She didn't have to serve herself, though. Just as when she sat on the table, a mug of coffee was placed in front of her. A hopeful child appeared from the opposite side of the table like a sunrise.

Shepard smiled sleepily at her waitress. This morning, Butterfly was a delight like sunshine. Her hair was braided and although she was wearing Shepard's spare shirt, it was clean.

"Well, well, my girl is so beautiful this morning. Did someone ask you on a date?"

Despite the compliment, Butterfly moaned. "Mommy, don't tell me you forgot."

What? "Today is someone's birthday or something?"

Butterfly shook her head violently. "We're going to dock in the Citadel in a few hours, and you promised we would go see daddy together."

Oh my, she had forgotten. Her daughter would be upset if she knew, perhaps she ought to lie. "Just kidding, B. How could I forget?"

The little one wasn't amused. "I'll be at the bridge." And she left without looking back.

Just like her dad on Horizon.

Shepard really wanted to bang her head against the table. She had no idea how they could be so similar. They'd never met, or had they?

She didn't have much time to ponder that question.

Liara sat down beside her. "Shepard, I have something for you."

"What is it?"

It was a very tiny chip, smaller than Shepard's pinky tip but glowing faintly. The asari looked so proud.

"A tracing device. I know you're going to bring Butterfly to the Citadel today. With this, you can trace her if... Well, just in case. One can't be too careful."

That's brilliant! Shepard could kiss her right now. "Thanks, Liara. I won't let her out of my sight, but you're right. Better safe than sorry."

"I'm glad to help," the asari blushed. "She is dear to me too. And well, whatever Major Alenko might say... Just know everyone loves her."

Stunned, Shepard didn't reply even after Liara clapped her shoulder and left.

* * *

Her heart was drumming in her chest. Light-headed, sweating, and probably going to pass out, she had never felt so nervous her entire life.

_Here we are, Huerta Memorial Hospital. He's here. We're going to meet him! What will he say? What if he rejects her? What if..._

"Mommy," the sweet voice asked. "Are you ok?"

Shepard's thoughts were interrupted. She felt embarrassed for being nervous while her girl was still so damn calm. No doubt, Butterfly got that after her dad.

Still, Butterfly wasn't that calm. Since she got up in the very early morning, she had ran around the ship, let Liara braid her hair, and cleaned herself properly. Butterfly behaved like a girl who was going on her first date.

And that scared Shepard. She knew the man would be nice to the girl, but what if he behaved like he did on Horizon? She swore to god, she would warp that perfect ass and toss him out of the window if he ever broke her daughter's heart.

Their... Butterfly was their daughter, Shepard reminded herself.

The small hand in hers squeezed gently. A bright smile was on Butterfly's face when Shepard looked at her. The Commander swallowed hard before she pushed the elevator button.

The door opened. Mother and child walked side-by-side, hand in hand into the hospital. Preoccupied with her thoughts, Shepard almost missed the sight of the drell in the hospital lobby if he hadn't called her name.

Thane Krios was at Huerta Memorial Hospital. He had sent her a message but she had completely forgotten about it. What kind of friend was she?

"Siha," The ex-assassin greeted. He didn't notice the little girl at first, but there was nothing that escaped his eagle vision. His big eyes blinked in confusion at the miniature version of Shepard.

The drell possess eidetic memory. Thane could remember every detail of every situation in his life. He remembered the girl almost instantly.

"Atma, good to see you are well." He kneeled, and took Butterfly's hands to his cheeks.

But the girl looked confused. Though she let him hold her hands. "Do I know you?"

"I'm sorry. It's been almost ten months since our meeting. You were an infant at the time, and thus you might not remember me."

"Oh, I remember now. You're Thane Krios. I remember your name but not your face." It was difficult to tell the drells apart.

Shepard knew they'd encountered each other before. But she didn't understand why Thane called her daughter that name.

"Atma, what does that mean?"

"Spirit, life and breath," Still holding her hands, the drell thought back to the day he met the little girl. _"They locked mother and child in the small room. Atma is crying over the unconscious woman. She was covered in blood and gore, barely breathing. The man said: the Collector would pay them handsomely."_

The Collectors? Well, that wasn't surprising. They wanted her corpse. Why wouldn't they want Butterfly? Half of her DNA came from Commander Shepard.

The question is: how could they know Butterfly was hers?

"I killed them and rescued the family. Even in the medic's care, it took three days for Marian to regain her consciousness. I stayed with them for a few days. We separated at a transit station." In his line of work, saving a life was rare. Butterfly was a rare redemption. "Speaking of which, where is Marian? And why are you with Siha?"

Butterfly didn't answer. She avoided his eyes and stared at the floor.

"Oh... I'm sorry." Marian told him only a little about themselves. He knew they were hunted by appalling people. The Blue Suns was only one of those groups. It was not a surprise they finally killed the poor woman.

The girl tried to smile. "It's ok."

Although she wanted to stay and talk, Shepard had to get to Kaidan's room before something happened. While she was sure Cerberus wouldn't attack them when they were out in the public and around C-Sec guards, one couldn't be too careful. Better not stay too long,

"I'm sorry, Thane. But we have to go."

"You came to visit someone?" The ex-assassin asked. He wasn't the nosy type, thus he might have had a reason to ask.

She owed him for his help, so she didn't want to dismiss him without answering. "Yeah, we... It's a long and complicated story. I'll tell you later."

The drell nodded. However, before they left, Thane added, "She has Major Alenko's eyes."

Shepard froze. "You know him?"

"I heard about him from the news. When he woke up, we talked a little. He didn't talk much but I can say he is an honorable and decent man."

"Yes, he is."

"His condition is stable. The doctor still forbids him from using biotics, though. In this condition, he is vulnerable. His enemy might try to finish him off. I'll look after him while he's here."

Sighing in relief, Shepard was grateful. "Thank you, Thane. That means a lot."

"A friend helps a friend in need. Besides, I'm on my last phase of my life. It's good to be generous."

He still looked good. His syndrome sounded like a lie when she saw him, speaking so calmly. Shepard almost forgot he was going to die.

"Does it hurt?" She asked, worried.

"Nothing I can't handle." Thane had to stop talking to cough, but he still smiled. "The doctor treats me well. My son visits often. I'm at peace now."

He was so calm. Shepard felt a little jealous. "I hope I can say that. Sometimes I feel..."

Something was wrong. The weight in her hand had disappeared. The Commander panicked as she realized her daughter wasn't there! How the girl leave without her or Thane noticing?

"Where is Atma?" She never had seen Thane upset like this.

"I don't know... We have to find her." _Breathe, Amala, breathe and think. You froze like this on Mars, and couldn't stop that droid before it almost killed Kaidan. You have to focus, now!_"Ok. Let's separate to extend our scope. Call me via Omni-tool if you find her."

Same as he always did when they were in a mission, Thane nodded before disappearing. Shepard looked around the lobby but didn't find any trace of Butterfly.

_Where did she go?_ Huerta Memorial Hospital wasn't a big place. Butterfly probably didn't go too far unless... No. She would have known if someone took the girl away. Butterfly was an intelligent child. She wouldn't let anyone abduct her easily.

Walking farther into the patients' room section, Shepard took a peek through the glass windows room-by-room. There was no one in any of the patient's rooms. Even Kaidan's room was empty.

_Damn, I came here to tell him about his daughter, but I just lost her!_ Shepard thought angrily. _He has one more reason to distrust me now._

Looking at her reflection, Shepard finally remembered that Butterfly was wearing her N7 hoodie. And the tracing device Liara gave her was in its pocket.

Shepard ran the tracing program to find Butterfly's location. She almost cried in relief as she received the result. The spot wasn't far. Her daughter was still in the hospital and wasn't moving.

And the location was... near the lobby?

* * *

At this point, I believe everyone knows I won't follow the game story line. And I dares to change many things including the ending. I love happy-ending. But it won't be 'sunshine and rainbow' or 'everything is right'.

We just have to wait and see.

Anyway, before we go that far, I thank The Lonely Traveler for beta. :D


	15. Family Reunion

"A family is a place where minds come in contact with one another."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Family Reunion (sort of)**

* * *

Fidgeting in his wheelchair, Kaidan Alenko felt useless. The doctor said his recovery was a miracle. Not everyone could pull through from such a brutal head injury. Still, he wanted to do something while the millions were out there were fighting. His Amala was fighting to save the galaxy without him... again.

Hell, he couldn't even use his biotics.

At least the doctor allowed him to leave the bed. The small garden outside the lobby was a good place to find some peace and to gather his thoughts. Not everyone used this place because it was outdoors and hidden from view. The green walls of alien plants divided him from the chaos outside.

He closed his eyes and inhaled the floral scent; the Major didn't hear the sound of light footsteps. He jumped a little as a small hand was placed on his.

Stunned was an understatement. Kaidan was speechless as he saw a crying little girl standing in front of him.

"It's been so long..." She sobbed.

_Who is this girl?_ He didn't have time to question her as she threw herself to him. Automatically, all he could do was hold her tight.

"Shh, don't cry, sweetheart." He didn't know why, but that word came out of nowhere.

When she stopped sobbing and looked at him, the Major's heart raced. The girl looked like Amala Shepard. But, her brown eyes were...

"I'm Kaidan Alenko. And you're..."

"Everyone calls me Butterfly." Her voice somehow sounded familiar too.

She tried to wipe her tears with her sleeve. That's when Kaidan noticed the N7 logo on her oversized hoodie.

N7, her face... This couldn't be a coincidence.

"Pleasure to meet you but... Why are you alone? You should be with your parents."

Brown eyes blinked. Kaidan was sure he had seen those eyes before. "I... I'm sorry."

Oh no, she's about to cry again! "I didn't mean to scold you or anything. It's just... You mom will be worried."

"You're right. I didn't think clearly. Mommy will be upset. I better go back."

He knew he shouldn't let her go alone. The girl might wander aimlessly looking for her mother. "Hey, don't worry. I'll help you find her."

Butterfly raised one of her brows.

"Look, I can't walk but this wheelchair is as good as a mini shuttle. Well, it can't fly but it can carry us around. It even has a VI. I just shut it up because I wanted some peace." The Major played with the console for a while, and then the red button beeped.

"Please specify a destination." The VI requested.

"See? This carriage is ready to serve and your charioteer is glad to assist. Just say the word, my princess." Kaidan kissed her small palm gently.

Butterfly smiled wide. "A chivalrous knight?"

"Not very useful in this state but... being your knight is an honor."

The girl managed to grin wider. "Then, where will we go?"

The reception would be the best place to start at, but he didn't want to go there yet. "Um, before we go, can I ask you something?"

She nodded. "Aye."

"Who is..." He took a deep breath. "... your mommy?"

The girl was going to answer when a very high-pitched shout interrupted them.

"B, what are you doing here?"

Kaidan knew that voice. He didn't have to look up to see Commander Shepard marching toward them furiously. She saw nothing but Butterfly in that moment. She yanked the girl off him not so gently.

"By the love of...Did you think about your safety? You scared the living daylights out of me, you know?" Shepard shouted and shook the little one angrily.

Butterfly didn't protest. "I'm sorry, mommy."

The Commander paused. They stared at each other until the mother continued. "Then don't do that again. Mommy couldn't bear it if anything had happened. I- I can't lose you. It's bad enough to see your dad..."

The words died off. She finally realized they had an audience. Of all people, he was Kaidan.

"She is..." The words escaped him. The Major finally realized where he had seen those eyes before: in the mirror. "Impossible..."

Yeah, everyone knew it when they saw Butterfly. Shepard was sure he already knew who the girl was, but he was as stubborn as a mule, he didn't believe it. "Just... Let me explain, ok?"

He listened; he didn't throw harsh words at her like he did on Horizon. Kaidan stared at Butterfly doubtfully as his brain tried to process the story.

Shepard was with his... no, their child before she died. They both died in space. Cerberus scientists resurrected the mother while another team cloned their daughter. If it wasn't for the people who sacrificed their lives for Butterfly's safety, he might have never met her.

"This is madness." He felt like his head was going to explode, and he couldn't blame it on his amp.

"Daddy?" Butterfly asked, not sure what would happen next. But Shepard could tell she was about to cry. The girl had high hopes. She wouldn't be able to handle it if she failed her.

Kaidan didn't say anything. He just stared at her for minutes. He had doubts about Shepard's being before. And this girl...

"I can't believe it." He could sense the beginning of a migraine. "You never told me you were with child, Shepard."

"Well, I couldn't just tell you after... I rejected your proposal." Her stupidity, she knew it.

"It's not only that. I-I thought you were taking... precautions."

"Oh, it's my fault now?" Anger got the best of her. "Why don't you blame your sperm? I never wanted to have her or even..."

Damn, did she just say...?

They stared at Butterfly. The girl didn't even sob. She just looked at them with wide eyes. Her cheeks soaked with tears.

"You don't want me."

_Dammit, dammit_. "No, B. I didn't mean..."

Butterfly screamed. Dark energy exploded all around her ten times stronger than Shepard had ever done in battlefield. Every glass window nearby shattered. Two marines were almost thrown away by the force if Shepard hadn't formed a barrier to cover them.

Suddenly, the girl passed out. She fell to the ground lifelessly. Shepard ran to her but the balcony shifted beneath her feet.

There was an explosion underground! The platform was collapsing on the other side and gravity dragged Kaidan's wheelchair with it. The Major tried to stop the wheels but the VI was out of order, overloaded by the dark energy.

Without thinking, Shepard rushed to his side to pull him off the wheelchair. She helped him walk but they had been stopped in their tracks.

A man with a black mask was standing in front of them. In his right hand was a blade, but the most horrifying was what was in his left arm. It was an unconscious Butterfly!

The hospital was nothing but chaos. People were busy trying to get out while the staff was treating patients shocked because every vital machine in the area stopped functioning.

Help wouldn't come soon.

"Get away from her." The Commander growled, even though she was carrying an injured man. She didn't know this man, but it was obvious he wasn't friendly. No person in his or her right mind would carry a katana around while in the Citadel.

The man smirked. "Why?"

"She is ours." Kaidan groaned. He was trying to form his biotics. If it would cost his life to save his daughter, so be it.

"She won't be, when we're done with her."

Another boom, the ground collapsed more. Two marines slid down. Fortunately, Shepard grabbed the crack in time while another hand still grabbed Kaidan's. Still, Kaidan was hanging in midair. If she had lost her grip, he would have fallen.

"Amala, don't worry about me." Kaidan yelled. In this condition, he was nothing but a burden. If they stayed like this, the masked man would get away. "Go help Butterfly."

But... This was like Virmire all over again. Shepard had to choose between the man she loved and... No. She couldn't do it.

"I can't lose you, Kaidan."

The man jumped to the top of the hospital. There, a shuttle was waiting. Shepard saw the pilot was wearing a Cerberus' uniform.

"No! Anybody..."

Their prayer was answered by a drell. Thane threw the shuttle's pilot with a biotic throw so the masked man had to stay and fight. They spared in close combat since Thane had no weapon.

Although he was carrying a baby with one arm, the Cerberus agent had better hands. Thane couldn't use a biotic attack because it might hit Butterfly since that bastard was using her as a shield.

From a side-glance, the drell saw Shepard and her man struggled to get to safer ground. If only he could hold this guy for a few moments...

Thane stumbled on a loose plate of the hospital's roof. It was enough time for the Cerberus agent to attempt to stab Thane through his stomach.

Clank! He couldn't believe his eyes as he saw the blade had been cut by dark energy. Death avoided him in a matter of seconds.

He looked up and saw Butterfly smiled weakly. "I always pay my debts."

There was no time to wonder. A bullet charged straight at his head. Fortunately, his armor saved him.

The backup! Thane realized. A second shuttle with a group of sharpshooters came to his view. Although he hated it, he had to run from the tempest of bullets.

They stopped shooting. From his cover, the drell saw the masked man carry the girl into the new shuttle. C-Sec guard's shuttles finally arrived but were still too slow to catch them.

Limp, he felt like he spent all of the energy in his body. Thane couldn't look at the couple that had just lost their child.

Not far, Commander Shepard yelled at Commander Bailey. She wanted to go after those dogs herself but the man didn't agree. She was injured and his men were already following the shuttle.

Still, she didn't give up. She tried to locate Butterfly via tracing device but the signal was gone. It probably was destroyed by Butterfly's biotics.

_She's gone_. Shepard couldn't believe it. Her daughter was gone. If losing Earth didn't hurt enough, this was the last straw. She lost all hope and strength in that moment.

Not caring if anyone badmouthed her, Shepard collapsed on her feet and cried like a broken mother. She didn't even care when Kaidan pulled her into his embrace.

There were no words. They just sat and cried together among the chaos.

* * *

I'm such an evil. XD Fear not, my readers. Butterfly will comeback, and not in ten years later or something. Just be prepare for more surprise.

Thank my wonderful beta; The Lonely Traveler. xxx


	16. Memories

"Memories are what warm you up from inside. But they're also what tear you apart."

_- Haruki Murakami, Kafka on the Shore_

* * *

**Memories**

* * *

_Bang!_ Shepard punched the wall of Bailey's office angrily. The C-Sec officer had locked her in his office. He said he wanted her to cool down._ How dare him? Cerberus has my daughter. I can't calm down!_

Outside the room, most of her crew was talking. They were on shore leave but came here as soon as they heard the news. Butterfly was one of the family members. They were worried about her. Through the wall, Shepard heard the discussed of a search.

Had Dr. Michel allowed Kaidan to leave the hospital, he would have joined them, she was sure.

Sighing, she felt herself calm down for a bit. But it wasn't ok. Nothing was going to be ok until Butterfly came back to her, safe and sound.

Shepard dumped herself on the couch, head in her hands. She didn't know how much time had passed until someone said,

"Are you ok?"

It was Kasumi Goto; the great thief and also one of Shepard's closest friends. She didn't even ask how the master thief walked into the locked room without anyone knowing.

No need for words, Kasumi knew the answer by looking at Shepard's face.

"Yeah, stupid question." The thief sat down near the vanguard. She might not be able to help, but she didn't want to leave her friend alone.

The Commander wanted to smile at her friend, but she couldn't do it. "It's alright. I know you're worried."

"Everyone is worrying, Shep," she paused, waiting for Shepard's response. When the Commander didn't say anything, she continued, "I didn't know your daughter, but judging from their words she sounded like a sweet girl."

"The sweetest," Shepard felt a lump in her throat. The memory of Butterfly was precious. It hurt so much that she was gone, especially the way it happened. "One couldn't ask for a better daughter. She's everything to me... and I just... I've failed her."

"I believe you fought hard to protect her. If Butterfly is as good as your crew said, she will understand." The thief patted Shepard's shoulder gently.

"It's not just that. Before Cerberus showed up, I said something... She might think she's unwanted." It was true she didn't want her baby in the first place. Hell, she freaked out when she found out she was expecting. But Butterfly changed everything.

Face hidden underneath the hood, Kasumi's expression was hard to read. "Want to talk about it?"

Shepard thought for a while. Talking might help and Kasumi was trustworthy but... "Thanks, Kasumi. But talking about it right now hurts too much."

The master thief knew too well about losing a person that was dear to them, so she didn't press further. "I understand."

Still, Shepard knew better. "You didn't come here to coddle me, did you?"

"Yeah, I... Forget it. This isn't the right time to ask for a favor. In fact, it's not exactly my problem."

"I don't want to sit here and weep, Kasumi. Butterfly will not want me crying. Besides, I would go mad if I don't have something to focus on."

Kasumi wasn't sure, but it could work. "Alright. Do you remember Keiji's greybox?"

* * *

"The next terminal is in docking bay 24." The master thief whispered. She was hiding beneath the cloak, so her presence was unknown by the people around.

Shepard sighed. She needed something to occupy her mind, so she decided to help Kasumi. However, the hooded woman spoke the truth. It wasn't exactly her problem.

"Something's wrong?" Via the comm link, a salarian spectre named Jondum Bau asked.

Despite her occupation, Kasumi Goto had a good heart. She sent the anonymous tip to the spectre to help him in his investigation. The tip was the dangerous secret that had been hidden in the greybox containing Keiji's memories.

"I still can't believe the Alliance sent black ops into batarian space." It was a lie. She knew the extremity of human wickedness.

"A raid turned massacre." The salarian spoke with high speed. "They left with nothing. The reaper's tech disappeared. So has the hanar in the team."

"The Alliance would be thrown into another war if this secret was revealed." Kasumi chimed in.

"And it was possible that our mystery hanar might have his tentacles on the reaper tech." Shepard was sure that the jellyfish had been indoctrinated. He would do anything to assist the reapers. The sooner she got him, the better.

Following the trace in the terminal, the Commander moved to the next destination near the docking bay with stealthy Kasumi in tow.

The terminal wasn't far from the elevator. The thief followed the soldier closely, almost crashing into her when she suddenly stopped.

"What...?" Kasumi grumbled. However, her words died as a woman in a white suit walked towards them.

"Shepard," Miranda Lawson called the Commander. She didn't notice Shepard's change of emotion.

Before the conversation could go any further, Shepard grabbed Miranda's collar and threw that perfect body against a wall. Neither of them noticed that C-Sec guards were running to the scene.

"What the hell, Shepard?" The ex-Cerberus choked out.

Although they hadn't had a good relationship and wouldn't call each other friends, they respected each other. Shepard couldn't control herself. It had only been a few hours since Cerberus agents kidnapped her daughter. Her wound was still flesh. Anything related to those dogs, especially TIM's right hand, made her blood boil in rage.

"You..." She spit out. "How dare you?"

Fortunately, Kasumi wasn't Jack. She didn't let Shepard hit the cheerleader. "She isn't with them anymore, Shepard."

That was true. After a while, Shepard did lose her grip in defeat. "I'm sorry, Miranda."

The guards paused in their tracks, not sure what had happened. However, Miranda waved them off, told them it was a mistake.

"I heard about the strike." The ex-Cerberus agent carefully said. "They got a girl. Is she yours...?"

"Can we talk somewhere private?" The Commander wasn't sure if she would be able to control her temper. Besides, the details about the Lazarus Project shouldn't be repeated in public.

The thief coughed.

"Is that Goto?" Although she couldn't see the sneaky thief, Miranda had a guess.

"Yep." Still hiding under stealth mode, Kasumi answered quietly.

"It seems some of us have a habit of asking for help."

Kasumi was an easygoing person, but she took that as an insult. "Watch your tongue, cheerleader. I wouldn't have asked her if she hadn't volunteered. At least, I'd never ask her to help me manipulate my sister's life."

"I was protecting her," Miranda hissed.

For the people around, it was very strange to see a woman arguing with air. They started to talk and point at Miranda. Shepard had to stop the conversation before anything else happened. She was so sick of fighting today.

"I have an apartment in the Presidium. It isn't much. I haven't spent much time there, but it's secluded enough." She gave Miranda the coordinates and the code to unlock the door. "Wait there. I'll go see you after I'm done with this business."

For the suicide mission, Commander Shepard was the only reason the crew cooperated instead of killing each other. Neither of them wanted to disobey her command.

"Just make it quick. I can't stay here for long." Miranda stormed out.

"Goodness!" Shepard growled. "I swear my baby girl is more mature than you."

Suddenly, Miranda stopped in her tracks as if someone pulled her. "Baby girl? Cerberus attacked the hospital for your baby girl?"

"I take it that you know something."

Ms. Perfect was a very serious person, but this seemed odd. "I had heard something. But I never thought the Illusive Man would do such a thing."

"I..." Troubled, Miranda wasn't sure what to do. " We better talk at your place. I'll tell you everything I know about Project Caterpillar, I swear."

The Commander wondered if the ex-Cerberus agent would be true to her word. Still, it was better than nothing. "Fine, see you later."

...

Miranda was walking in circles when the door of Shepard's apartment opened. The Commander didn't say anything, just walked in and sat herself in the couch, hands massaged her temples. She looked tired.

Somehow, the ex-Cerberus agent couldn't help but worry. "How was your mission?"

"Not bad." Shepard sighed. "It could had been worse, if Kasumi hadn't been there. We caught the hanar who worked for the reapers. That stupid jellyfish was about to upload a virus to disable his home world's self-defense system. Things were quite a mess because Bau was attacked. But, well, Kasumi made a surprise appearance and stopped the upload."

Miranda didn't know who Bau was, but she didn't care to ask. "You've succeeded, then?"

"I just brought them time. Nowhere is safe until we destroy the reapers." Losing her daughter caused a loss of confidence. Shepard was no longer sure they would win.

She couldn't protect her own daughter, how could she save the galaxy from the old machines?

"I..." It seemed odd to see Ms. Perfect sputtering. "I believe you have a lot of questions."

"Damn right, I've got a ton. But first, begin by telling me whatever you know about Project Caterpillar." Dr. Arum mentioned Miranda. They probably had known each other well.

"It began when we found you were... with child. The Illusive Man spoke about the project once or twice. But he just dropped it, so I believed he didn't have an interest in your child anymore."

"He has." _Damn him._

"If I hadn't been occupied by Lazarus Project, I might have wondered why Dr. Arum left the project. He was... like a father to me, a mentor. Since I went to Cerberus, he was always looking out for his daughter and me. Arachne isn't a good person but..." Her words died out as she realized something.

"What's wrong?"

"I just... I'd heard about Project Caterpillar when Arachne sent me a message about her father's death. Perhaps she'd know something about it." And that wasn't going to be good.

"Should I be looking for this Arachne? Arachne Folic, I assume."

"You should. But I doubt you're going to find anything. Dr. Arum faked his and her death before they came to Cerberus."

"Did he ever tell you why they faked their deaths?"

"Because of Arachne," Miranda didn't want to say it. But this could be important. "She is a genius, but she is also psychopathic. About ten years ago, she ran a test on sick children in Athens. Some of them recovered from their illness, but some... died, not by the flu, but by the test."

"Wait. Are you saying...?"

"Arachne killed them. I'm not sure if she did it on purpose, but I know she never regretted it."

Shepard swallowed hard. Just thinking this kind of person might lay her hands on Butterfly made her sick. "Judging by your word, Dr. Arum was a good man. How could he have such a daughter?"

"I honestly don't know." Sighing, just thinking about that woman made her tired. "I don't even know if I really ever knew them."

"What do you know about the Folics?"

"First of all, Dr. Arum expertise is... was genetic engineering, and he was quite obsessed. He worked very hard to revive your cells. And he was the one who found the embryo."

_Genetic engineering? Oh my..._

"Wait a minute. Butterfly is too smart for a baby. Is that because of genetic engineering?"

Miranda thought for a minute. "I don't know. But if The Illusive Man chose him for the job, it wouldn't be for simple cloning. Besides, he would never pass up the opportunity."

"The opportunity?" That didn't sound good.

"She has _YOUR _genes, Shepard. That alone makes her valuable. And we knew where the rest of her DNA base came from; his genes were more than adequate. And since you are both powerful biotic users, it's possible that your child will be the same."

"And we know how much TIM _loves _human biotics." She shouldn't have been surprised.

"Yeah, they probably... modified her." Like Miranda's father had done to his daughters. Damn, she hated this.

Shepard's head was spinning. She felt like it was going to explode. It wasn't easy when you learned your daughter that you loved more than yourself might be a mutant.

_Would that change anything?_ She wondered. Butterfly was her daughter. Nothing was going to change that fact. "Whatever their plan is, Butterfly needs a rescue. Do you have any idea where they might keep her?"

"I wish I knew. But I'm no longer with them. I have no access to Cerberus resources since I cut ties with The Illusive Man."

They could be keeping her in any space station. Shepard didn't have the time or resources to search across the galaxy.

"You can't forget about Arachne. I don't know where she is but I might be able to contact her. She knows her father's work more than anyone. If The Illusive Man wants to continue the Caterpillar Project, he might have given her the job."

_Wait._"Are you saying?"

Miranda looked troubled. This kind of business was new for her. "I owe you, Shepard. You saved my sister, and also saved my life back in the Collector's base. I'll repay you in any way I am able."

"But... are you going do it alone? I don't want you to risk your life."

It was touching. No one but Dr. Arum and her sister ever worried about her welfare. The ex-Cerberus agent smiled softly in gratitude. "I'm already at risk, Shepard. The Illusive Man has ordered his agents to shoot me on sight."

Still, it didn't allay Shepard's fear for her welfare. "I can't stop you. But if you want any help, don't hesitate to contact me."

"No promises, Commander," Miranda smiled.

* * *

**Thank The Lonely Traveler for the beta.**


	17. Unfathomable

**This chapter is kind of emotional, which I'm not quite similar with. Thank to The Lonely Traveler for the beta. She made it a lot better.**

* * *

"A child can teach an adult three things: to be happy for no reason, to always be busy with something and to know how to demand with all his might that which he desires."

_- Paulo Coelho_

* * *

**Unfathomable**

* * *

After the loss of his husband, Cortez thought his life couldn't get any worse. He was wrong.

The bad news hit everyone hard. Butterfly was like the heart of the Normandy. Losing her was like losing the sun from the sky. Everyone, James included, was in shock.

He was near the docking bay when he heard the news. It hit him like a sledgehammer. He didn't even know how he returned to the shuttle bay. Cortez found himself sitting in his 'baby', staring at her console like an idiot.

And then, someone came.

The krogan stormed out the elevator. He looked angry... no, he was raging. This race was well known for their temper, but this one...

"Where are you going?" The female krogan asked calmly.

"To help Butterfly," Wrex spit out, "Those Pyjacks dare take her away from me, from her home. I'll skin them alive, one by one."

"And where they are?" She pointed out sharply. Again, Eve was the voice of reason.

That question knocked some sense back to him. The battlemaster was about to argue but couldn't find the words. It was some time until he shook his head, and lowered his shotgun down in defeat.

"I know you're angry. Everyone is. But we can't just go out there and look for her. We are in the middle of a war. There are the old machines trying to wipe out every species. We can't drop everything and go after her." Despite of what she said, she wanted nothing more but to start the rescue. She loved Butterfly, like her own daughter.

Hands gripped Wrex's arms; Eve placed her face on his shoulder. Krogan weren't able to shed tears, but that didn't mean they didn't know the concept of sadness.

From afar, the pilot looked at them silently. He didn't know krogan's were so emotional.

And yes, what she said was true. Although all of Butterfly's aunts and uncles were extraordinary, they couldn't use all of their resources in searching and rescuing the girl. Perhaps The Illusive Man did calculate it, so he dared to screw them up.

That bastard...

He looked down at the console in front of him, and his thoughts returned to Butterfly. 'Uncle Cortez' used to teach her to control the shuttle, and she was a fast learner. After a few tests, she passed the flight simulation like a professional.

That was creepy, he admitted. But when Butterfly was with you, it felt like the most normal thing in the galaxy. Every pain, every concern seemed absurd in her presence. It was the only time he smiled without faking it.

Butterfly had a natural charisma, just like her mother.

Cerberus didn't just take the girl away, but they also hurt everyone in her family.

Silently, tears fell from his cheeks. The pilot didn't hear the two krogans leave the shuttle bay, hand in hand.

Sometimes, even in the darkest hour, good can find its way.

* * *

_Beware of what you wish for_, they said.

If he were honest with himself, James admitted he used to wish Butterfly were gone.

And when it really happened, he didn't feel any good.

Head in his hands, James was drowning in his thoughts. He really didn't know why he kept thinking ill of Butterfly. And when he realized his mistake, it was simply too late.

_Stupid. Stupid. Stupid._

As much as he loved the Normandy, he hated the lack of personal space. The soldier grunted angrily as the door of the Port Observation opened. _Couldn't the man die in shame alone?_

He didn't look up. And the person who sat on the stool nearby didn't say a thing. One was buried in his thoughts while the other one was busy drinking. There was only silence in the room for a long time.

"You know?" Diana started. Her words sounded guttural. She wasn't only drunk, but also crying. "It's my fault. Everything is my fault."

The reporter always kept up her good looks, but she lost it all today. James couldn't help but stare dumbfounded.

"I told my producer about her. And he... he forwarded the information to other people. Cerberus might have gotten it and... I sold her out. I am a monster." Desperate, she confessed with a tearful face.

It wasn't surprising, exactly. EDI had gotten that log and informed Shepard. Still, this wasn't the time to blame each other for what had already happened.

"It isn't important." He couldn't believe he said that. "We have to pay attention to the rescue. I'm sure someone will come up with something. We... We will get her back."

Even in her drunken state, Diana didn't agree. "The galaxy is vast. Cerberus could hide anywhere. How will we find her?"

If it was another time, when they didn't have the ancient machines trying to harvest organic creatures, he was sure Shepard would find a way. However, the Reapers were the greatest problem.

"Shepard will find her." They both jumped. The voice from the intercom was Joker's. "The Shepards' are strong. Butterfly will come home, sooner or later."

"I hope I can share your optimism." James answered without a hint of sarcasm.

The pilot was quiet for a while. "They died, James. They both died because of me. But even death couldn't stop them. I'm pretty sure TIM won't kill Butterfly. As long as she's still alive, we still have a chance to rescue her."

_I wish it were true_, James prayed.

* * *

"Calm down, Liara." Feron, the Shadow Broker's agent and friend warned through the communication channel. "You need to focus."

"Don't tell me that!" Liara shouted. She was walking in circles, too upset to reason.

"Losing your head won't bring her back." Sighing, the drell felt hopeless. He had never seen his friend acting unreasonable before. That human child must really be important to her.

Liara knew it. But it didn't mean she could calm down. Everyone on the ship was thirsty for The Illusive Man's blood. They were beyond livid, and they would do anything to save Butterfly.

_Her dear niece_, she must be frightened. Liara hated to think about what Cerberus might do to the girl. They hunted her down as if she were an animal. It was hard to believe they would take pity on her.

Butterfly was a sweet baby. It will be a misery if she turned into Jack no.2.

"We need to find her, ASAP. I want everyone out there, searching for Butterfly. And by everyone, I mean including you."

_Yeah, that girl is very important,_ Feron thought. "And what's about the Reapers? I understand your love for that human child, but we still have a war to fight. You can't spend our assets on one girl."

_Dammit,_ she hated it when he was right! "She isn't just a girl, Feron. She is Shepard's daughter."

"And what did the Commander say?"

"She... As always, she is busy saving our asses." Duty came first. No matter how much she loved her daughter, Shepard would never abandon her duty. Sometimes, Liara hated that attitude. "I know Shepard. She is trying to save Earth and everyone from the Reapers. Because of that, she can't go after Butterfly. But... It isn't fair, Feron. Shepard has fought so much, lost too much. I have to do something."

Although Shepard chose Kaidan, Liara didn't stop loving the Commander. The drell understood her feelings.

Sighing, he gave up half way. "Alright, I'll see what I can do. But we can't send everyone out. Half of our agents are in the red zone. It won't be easy to leave their posts."

"I'll keep monitoring the information. With EDI's help, we might get something." Still it was better than nothing.

They stared at each other through the monitor. Although the tension between them was too obvious for comfort, they couldn't be more than friends.

"And thanks, Feron. For calming me down."

"No need to mention it." The drell smiled. "You and Commander Shepard saved my life, despite of what I had done. I just hope I can help more."

Liara smiled back, and still smiled like that even after she cut the line.

* * *

His hands were shaking, badly.

It had been a while since he had gotten angry, and it was still hard to control the rage. He wanted to shoot something. To be specific, he wanted to shoot The Illusive Man. That bastard dared to take his niece from her family. He deserved a slow, painful, and merciless death.

But even in his fury, Garrus realized that was impossible. As long as TIM and his dogs were in hiding, Archangel, or even the bloody Commander Shepard would never be able to touch them.

Sighing, he leaned on the main battery. Normally, the sound in this room calmed him down, but today was different.

Nothing was going to be the same now that Butterfly wasn't around.

'Incoming call,' his personal terminal informed him. Although he wasn't in the mood for a chat, he looked at the caller's name.

Tali'Zorah vas Normandy?

He better answer this one. Tali would never stop nagging him if he ignored her.

Besides, he missed her.

"What took you so long?" As soon as he picked the call, the quarian snapped.

_Woman,_ Garrus rolled his eyes. "I'm kind of busy. You know. My niece has been abducted. And despite our capabilities, we can do almost nothing."

Talking about it made his head spin. The turian said angry words although he didn't mean them.

_This isn't good,_ Tali thought. Her face was hidden beneath the helmet but her voice was full of emotion. "I'm sorry, Garrus. I know Butterfly was important to you."

The last time they talked, the turian spent an hour talking about Butterfly. Uncle Garrus was proud of his niece.

"She _is_ important, Tali. I'm still not sure why, but she had a great affect on us. When she was taken... Let's say The Illusive Man hit us on the right spot."

"What about Shepard? The poor mother must be hurt." The Commander was like the big sister she never had. Tali concerned about her state of sanity.

"Shepard is hurt, but she won't show it." Sighing, the turian held his head. "We all know her. She is the bloody Commander Shepard. Only one she ever shared her worries with is Kaidan. His amp spiked when he tried to save Butterfly. Dr. Michel has him on lock down."

"She will need him." This situation reminded her of her parents. Her father used to be a warm and kind man, but he lost it when her mother died. They needed each other to stay sane.

"He would come back to her as soon as they release him, I think." After Horizon, Garrus wasn't sure if he knew the man.

"And what about you? Are you going to go after her?"

At first, he thought about it. But he couldn't leave Shepard now. "I'd love to, but I can't."

He was always reasonable. And that's what she loved about him. Tali was glad she had her helmet on, so he couldn't see she was blushing. "I'm trying to convince the other Admirals to stop the stupid fight against the geth and send help to Earth. I hope they listen to me."

"Why wouldn't they? You're the youngest and brightest admiral among them." Despite the situation, he couldn't help it.

"Are you flirting with me, General?"

If he had learned anything from Butterfly, it was sometimes you have to take a chance for the thing you desire. "You know you like it, Admiral."

* * *

**From The Author:**

Truly, when the readers called me evil, I felt my life was completed. Because that meant you attached to my story. For the writer, there's nothing better than that. XD

The problem is: how could I keep you to stay with Butterfly? I must say that gave me headache. But don't worry. I still have some tricks in my sleeve.

By the way, I like to answer the previews.

-To Aya001: As always, I aim to please. And I know the story would be bored if I make it all fluffy. Well, my thought anyway.

-To Trishata96: My Amala Shepard was kind of 'incomplete'. She was always wanted to love and beloved, but she was also afraid of losing people she cared for, and thus she freaked out when Kaidan proposed. You'll see in the next chapter that she ruined her life out of fear.

For the space hamster, I got the idea from lovely lady in Tumblr. I can't remember her name but I always thank her for the idea.

-To swimfeared: Your comment made me :3. It seems the Reapers were forgotten. (Sorry Harbinger.) I'm sure all aunts and uncles would ready to crush Cerberus and save their niece. _But_ just like I wrote in this chapter: they still had the war to fight. They couldn't spend all of their assets finding Butterfly. In a sense, TIM was saved by the Reapers.

What a lucky bastard.


	18. Fate

Let's take a break with something fluffy.

* * *

"Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like."

_- Lemony Snicket_

* * *

**Fate**

* * *

His father was an Alliance soldier. He understood why the man was always on missions. To make up for lost time, his father spent most of his shore leaves with his family.

But that day was different.

The cap stopped in front of the house. Kaidan knew his father came back from his mission that day. As fast as his short legs could carry him, the boy ran to his father's waiting arms.

"Oh, my boy is growing up." Ken Alenko raising the child up. The boy laughed in absolute merriment. "How are you doing, big guy? Were you a good boy when I wasn't home?"

"I'm always a good boy, daddy." The two year old boy pouted. His whiskey-brown eyes same as his father's.

The older man laughed. He knew his son was a mama's boy. Kaidan wouldn't ever intentionally hurt his mother. Adrika Alenko didn't let her only son behave like those brats on the street.

He always hoped he could spend more time with Kaidan. The boy grew up with his mother and female cousins.

Kaidan looked over his father's shoulders and blinked in confusion.

Behind Ken was a man with dark hair. He was wearing his BDU, so the boy assumed he was in the Alliance too. But he didn't look so good. He swayed a little as a small package in his arms moved.

Ken seemed to know what his son wanted to say. "Do you remember Mr. Shepard? He will stay with us for a few days before going back to New York."

"Good to see you again, young man," Shepard gave him a warm smile. "But I 'm afraid I have a situation here. Can you call your mother? I really don't know how to... change diapers."

The small thing in the white sheet was crying. Kaidan finally realized it was a baby.

A baby girl... He knew it. She was the most beautiful baby he'd ever seen. Although she was crying, her green eyes were shining.

"Her name is Amala, Amala Shepard," Clint Shepard said proudly.

* * *

"Her name is Amala, Amala Shepard." Corporal Jenkins grinned like an idiot. Three shots of whiskey made him more talkative more than usual. "We're going to work with the hero of Elysium! Think about it."

Kaidan smiled. Although serving under the hero of Elysium was thrilling, his friend was overreacting. "She is our XO. Don't get overexcited."

"You have to see that ass." The man wasn't listening to him. "Vanguards wear light armor, right? And the way she carries herself... Gorgeous, my friend, she is gorgeous."

"You've had too much whiskey." He shoved Jenkins' next shot back to the bartender.

"Come on, man. Tonight is my last night on Earth. We'll be off with the Normandy in the morning. Let's have some fun."

In hindsight, the corporal might had known his fate.

"I didn't come looking for fun." He just wanted to blow off some stream. The pub was quiet enough and a few drinks couldn't hurt.

Jenkins made a funny noise in his throat. "I don't know why the girls thought you were cute. You're such a nerd. You kept talking about tech and sci-fi movies goodies. How are you going to get girls in your bed, man?"

Perhaps he ought to shove his foot up Jenkins ass. "You're going to make a fool of yourself, Corporal. Let's get you back to your bunk."

Jenkins protested like a child. He insisted on staying until a stranger walked towards them.

"Need a hand?"

Kaidan looked up. His eyes became fixated on her gorgeous ocean-green eyes.

"I'm Amala Shepard."

* * *

"I'm Amala Shepard. And I want you to stop calling me by my surname."

Hand on her delicate shoulder, Kaidan smiled and kissed the line upon her spine. He knew that was her sweet spot. Shepard would squeal in delight every time he kissed it.

"Old habits die hard." He kissed her again, this time on her cheek.

Amala turned around so they could kiss fully. The kiss started chaste, but it became more demanding as their tongues fought for dominate. Kaidan won this time.

"I don't want to leave this bed." She murmured.

"Yeah, me too." _Time doesn't stop._He thought bitterly as he looked at the clock on the night table.

They had won. Sovereign was dead and the Citadel was saved. Captain Anderson gave them shore leave but it was only for a few days. Neither of them wanted to leave the apartment. If the furniture could talk, they would complain about the abuse.

They made love on every furniture piece and in every way possible. But he just couldn't get enough of her.

Amala's hand traveled down. She couldn't get enough of him too, it seemed.

"We have twenty hours before we go back to the Normandy." And he had a plan in mind. "Get up, sweetheart. I have a surprise for you."

"I hate surprises." In her life, surprises always came with death and destruction.

"This one's good, I promise," Kaidan smiled wide. He had planned this for some time. A crimson box in his pocket kept poking his heart since he brought it three days ago.

_Was it too soon?_He wondered.

She was never able to resist those puppy eyes. At last, Amala gave up. "Alright, I'm getting up. But this has to be good, or you will have a problem, LT."

"You have my word, Amala Shepard."

* * *

"You have my heart, Amala Shepard."

He placed a bouquet of sunflowers on her empty grave. People remembered her as a hero, a savior. But in his eyes, she was the woman he loved.

Although she didn't love him back.

He bit his lip, trying to stop the tears that threatened to fall. It was a year since the Normandy went down. He ought to move on. He ought to...

But his heart couldn't do it. The day she died, his heart died with her. Kaidan couldn't move on.

"Sometimes, even men have to shed tears." A man in a ragged overcoat sat down beside him. The old man placed a bouquet of sunflowers as well. "Get it out, son. You don't have to carry all that sorrow on your shoulders."

Kaidan didn't know the man, but he let his tears flow. They sat in silence for an hour.

At last, the old man stood up. But he still looked at Amala's tombstone. "Who would ever have ever thought? I couldn't share the joyous moments with her, but I've always been able to cry over her grave."

"Excuse me, sir?" This man looked familiar.

"I'm just an old soldier." He cut off. "It feels strange, though. My old friend's son was involved with Amala. Perhaps it was fate."

It took a while for him to realize. "You are... Mr. Shepard."

The man had changed a lot. His hair was all grey and his face full of worried lines. "I'd hoped we could have met in better circumstances. Guess things never go as planned, huh?"

Kaidan felt like he was caught by the father of his date. Mr. Shepard didn't scold him. After all, the LT didn't just sleep with his CO. He even tried to propose.

Her rejection wasn't the end of his love for her.

"Amala was a hothead but she had a good heart. I'm sure she'd want you to move on," Mr. Shepard smiled fatherly.

"It won't be easy," Kaidan shook his head.

"I know. I still love my girlfriend although she died more than three decades ago. But it doesn't hurt as much anymore. You will be fine, son. Just give yourself some time."

Clint saluted the tombstone one last time. He left Kaidan to stand alone upon the empty grave.

You will be loved, Amala Shepard, hero of Elysium and savior of the Citadel.

* * *

"Amala Shepard, hero of Elysium, savior of the Citadel, you're in the presence of a legend, and a ghost..."

The love of his life.

After two years of grieving, she returned from the dead. Amala Shepard was standing in front of him. Her eyes shining and she was more beautiful than ever.

She was sweating but also smiling in relief. Half of the people of Horizon had been abducted by the collectors but he was saved.

Kaidan wanted to kiss her, badly. He wanted to make sure she was really alive. At that moment, neither logic nor reason meant anything. He didn't care if this was only a dream.

Two years without her was too hard.

"Kai..."

He didn't let her finish. His hand pulled her closer for a hug. God... If this was a dream, please let him sleep forever.

Fate was cruel.

He opened his eyes and the truth hit him. A woman behind Shepard was wearing a Cerberus uniform. Even Shepard and Garrus's armor had the same logo.

"You work for Cerberus?" Unconsciously, he barked.

"I know it looks bad. Just let me explain..." She tried to calm him down.

But it was like the grief he felt for the past two years clamped down on him. He was too angry to listen. "Explain what? I thought you were dead. Two years, Amala, I cried for you. But you just came back and are working for Cerberus. How could you do this?"

"I don't work for them, I work with them." She yelled back. Neither of them would back down. "Don't you see? People have been abducted but no one has done anything. Cerberus is helping me fight the collectors. I have to..."

"So you faked your death. You made me grieve for two years. How could you...? I thought we had something." He paused as he realized. "Okay. Now I understand why you rejected my proposal."

Shepard gasped. "What the hell are you talking about? You thought I... I really died, Kaidan. Cerberus took two years to pull me back together. But our..." She swallowed the word 'child' down. "Come with me, Kaidan. I need your help."

_I need you._

"No, Shepard. I can't work with Cerberus. We both know what they have done. I-I can't betray the Alliance."

He broke her heart, he knew it. But in that moment, it felt like good riddance. She put him through two years of grief, long lonely nights, and days of self-loathing. She deserved to be hurt.

Before he could change his mind, Kaidan turned and left.

Shepard called his name. It was desperate. And an invincible hand pulled him to a stop.

"Just... stay safe, Shepard." Without looking back, Kaidan said one last time.

As soon as he was sure she didn't see him, Kaidan fell on his knees and cried.

"Goodbye, Amala Shepard."

* * *

"Her name is Butterfly Shepard." The reporter said out loud. "The girl was abducted from the hospital this morning. The witnesses believe the kidnappers were Cerberus operatives. Until now, we still haven't heard about a ransom. C-Sec officers believe..."

The screen was turned off.

Kaidan groaned. Dr. Michel forbade him his Omni-tool, biotics, and visitors. And since every channel was focusing on Butterfly's abduction, she forbade him from watching them as well.

"You have to calm down, Major," the good doctor told him from the other side of the window. Instead of a shock from spiking his amp, his biotics were more powerful than ever. In fact, too powerful. They had to lock him down until he could control his new level of biotics.

If it was another biotic, she wouldn't worry. But Kaidan Alenko was an L2. Most of the people with the same model had gone insane or died of cancer. He was a lucky one but it didn't mean he couldn't lose his mind, especially after he just lost his daughter.

She knew a father who committed suicide to give his internal organs to his child. The love of a parent was capable of anything.

"You don't have to tell me that," Kaidan tried to breathe deeper and slower. He was always good in keeping control.

Losing his head wouldn't help, he told himself. Butterfly needed help and he wouldn't be able to help her if he was locked down like this.

Butterfly... His thoughts went back to his daughter. It was only a few minutes they were together. But he felt...

_Why didn't he hold her tighter when he had the chance?_

No longer holding back, Kaidan fell on the floor and cried. He swore to himself that he would fight like hell for a chance to hold her again. Butterfly was a part of him and Amala. They wouldn't abandon her. The Reapers be damned.

The Major didn't notice the doctor's absence. She came back in a few minutes later with his Omni-tool. She uploaded a picture to the screen in front of his room.

Kaidan gasped. It was a picture of a smiling Butterfly.

"Your tool accidentally took a shot." The picture was slightly blurred but that didn't lessen Butterfly's beauty. "You have a beautiful daughter, Major."

_Yes, she is beautiful,_Kaidan thought. With a tearful face, he smiled. Biotic sparks around him slowly dissipated.

Dr. Michel sighed in relief.

"Doctor?" His question made her jump.

"What is it, Major?"

Something in him had changed. He was no longer in doubt. Kaidan knew what he should do. "Call the human representative. I have the answer he wants to hear."

* * *

My oh my, I couldn't believe I finish this chapter within 12 hours. It would be scrap if The Lonely Traveler didn't scrub it for me. Thank you a lot.


	19. War in your heart

"It's so hard to forget pain, but it's even harder to remember sweetness. We have no scar to show for happiness. We learn so little from peace."

_- Chuck Palahniuk, Diary_

* * *

**War in your Heart**

* * *

Time is a tricky thing. When you want it to be over, time doesn't move. But when you want it to stop, time flies away.

And in the end, you never had enough of it at all.

The 'Star of Terra' was shining on her shoulder. People from everywhere came to shake her hand and congratulate her. But those faces had no meaning at all. She kept looking for one man, but he never came.

After all that happened, she just wanted some time to talk with the man she called father. But things had never been easy for the Shepards'.

* * *

The Normandy's comm had been designed for long-range communication. However, it was almost impossible to contact Earth because of the Reapers. When Traynor told her they had received a message from Earth, the Commander was thrilled.

Static slowly formed the image. She couldn't believe what she saw.

"Aren't you a sight for sore eyes, Shepard," the man from Earth said.

For a few seconds, she didn't know what to say. The hologram in front of her was Anderson. After what had happened to Earth, it was hard to believe he was well and still fighting.

"Admiral, it's good to see you, sir." Shepard finally said.

The man smiled, although it wasn't as bright. "Just because I reinstated you, doesn't mean you have to go formal on me, Shepard."

Anderson had been there for her for many years.

Father Clint, the man who tried to keep the young from joining the Reds was Anderson's friend. He saved Shepard from the gang and sent her under the soldier's care. Ever since, the man became her surrogate father.

It was hard to leave Earth.

"I'm glad your ass is still intact, Anderson." Truly, seeing him gave her hope, despite Butterfly's kidnapping.

Anderson didn't look so happy. "It took some time to establish communication between Earth and the outside world. But Hackett and I had some time to talk. I heard about your missions and... Butterfly."

She was worried the Admiral didn't approve. He trusted her to do the missions right, but she... slept with her subordinate.

"I'm sorry she was taken." There was no trace of anger in his eyes. Anderson really meant it.

"I can't let it affect my mission." She was a mother, but she was the Commander first. Despite the resistance, people out there were being harvested or killed by the Reapers. Her daughter couldn't be more important than Earth. "I just hope Butterfly won't hate me because of this."

All her aunts and uncles wanted to help find Butterfly. The Shadow Broker had limitless resources. The Archangel had skills and people who owed him. The battlemaster had an angry krogan army. The Admiral had the Alliance fleet. No doubt, together they could crush Cerberus to a void.

Things never had been easy.

The Reapers were also a concern. With the war on, the girl couldn't be their top priority, despite their eagerness.

"I hope I can help in some way." There was no need to say it, but Shepard's daughter was like his granddaughter.

_I hope I could show her to you._ Shepard thought.

"You have Earth to protect. Don't worry about us." She tried to smile. Anderson had enough burdens on his shoulders; she shouldn't place more problems on them.

"I'll do my best. People on Earth are fighting too. The resistance is established. Although things are bad around here, we'll do whatever we are able."

That was all they could hope. "I'll return with more help, Anderson."

Anderson nodded. "It isn't easy with the countless losses we have every day, but you have given us hope. We need whatever good news you can send our way." However, before he cut the line, the Admiral remembered. "One more thing, Shepard. Clint is here too."

"Father Clint? Oh, I mean Mr. Shepard." Clint Shepard wasn't a priest, but Amala called him that because he fussed over her since she was young.

"Yes, him. He is helping protect the civilians. It has been a long time, but he is still good with a sniper rifle."

"S... Sniper rifle? I didn't know he had it in him." For her, Mr. Shepard was a fussy old man.

"You didn't know him, it seems." He was going to say something more, but changed his mind. "The Shepards' are always strong. Clint survived the hit and also managed to rescue a lot of children. I'm sure Butterfly has his strength."

Wait! "You didn't just say he is my father, did you?"

"Not by blood. He looked after you since... You ought to hear it from the man himself. I'll patch you to him next time."

Next time... She didn't like that term. "We both know, things could go crazy anytime. There might never be a 'next time' for either of us. Please tell me, Anderson."

The truth hurt, didn't it? Anderson sighed in defeat. "Alright. The short story is Clint found you in between one of his missions, and then brought you to Earth. He wanted to adopt you, but he also had PTSD from that mission, so they didn't approve his request. For the rest, you have to ask him."

Well, things had never been easy for the Shepards'.

"I shouldn't be surprised, perhaps. He is a stubborn and secretive old man." Thinking about it, Clint and Kaidan were quite similar.

"I have to go. The Reapers might be tracking this channel if we talk for too long. Good luck out there, Shepard." Anderson cut the line. In a few seconds, the Commander saw his face change to a worried expression.

And then the holo vid became static before disappearing completely. Shepard watched the emptiness as she tried to remember.

Clint Shepard and Shepard were never close. She had no idea he was looking after her since she was a baby. They hardly saw each other. He would make his appearances only when she was in trouble.

When she was seventeen, the Reds and another gang had a serious rivalry situation. The gangs attacked a base with heavy weapons. Shepard was shot and lost much blood. When she woke up again, she was in the hospital. Somehow Clint saved her life.

And as soon as the doctor allowed her to leave, he sent her to Anderson. She was in the soldier's care for a year before she enlisted with the Alliance. However, that was also the last time she saw Clint.

She thought she never had a family until the Normandy, but it seemed she was wrong.

The first time she called him father, the man looked so delighted although it was out of mockery. Perhaps he always wanted to be her father. She never noticed it before.

"Stay safe, old man." She prayed.

* * *

Unknown to her, Clint was hiding among the crowd. The girl made him so proud and he really wanted to tell her. He also knew the press was looking. If he made himself known, they would link Amala with a useless soldier like him. He couldn't let that happen.

"Your mother would be proud." Clint said before left. In his head, he saw the woman he loved who died protecting an orphan girl.

* * *

_I insert my original character in the story. Mr. Clint Shepard's character base on my dad. He was a tall, thin but strong man and barely talked. However, he was a good man. My mom told me he saved my cousin's live by outsmart the my mean grandma. (She didn't like her daughter in low. When the poor woman pregnant, grandma wanted to kill her grandchild. My dad offered to give my aunt the drug that would kill the child in her womb, but instead he gave her a dose of Vitamin and then helped her escaped. Later, she returned with my cousin. Grandma couldn't stop the couple anymore. Now, my cousin is a good and strong man. He even takes care of the woman who once wanted him dead since my grandpa died year ago. Ironically, isn't? Oh I love happy-ending and I sure love my dad.)_

_Back to our point. I name Clint Shepard after Clint Eastwood. If you wanted image of him, you could think about the actor._

_And Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta and suggestions. The story wouldn't be this good without you, my dear. :D_


	20. The Sinful Weaver

"The belief in a supernatural source of evil is not necessary; men alone are quite capable of every wickedness."

_- Joseph Conrad, Under Western Eyes_

* * *

**The Sinful Weaver**

* * *

Miranda Lawson wasn't a socially-minded woman. She hardly had anyone she considered a friend; especially after she helped Shepard destroy the Collector's base. Many people owed her and they would repay when she needed it, even if there was no trust between the parties.

Trust wasn't easy to come by, but easy to break and lose.

However, Shepard was an exception. The Commander gained Miranda's trust and loyalty by helping her save her sister. She didn't regret leaving Cerberus.

The Illusive Man had changed. He wasn't the same man she'd known. Helping Shepard or not, she would have left him anyway.

Sighing, the ex-Cerberus agent leaned back on the couch in Noveria station's lobby. This place wasn't safe for her, but she needed to meet someone.

Someone sat down on another couch behind her. "Good afternoon, Ms. Lawson."

It was a polite greeting, but Miranda's hand reached for the gun inside her pocket. The woman had been expected but her presence dangerous. "Arachne?"

"Nice to see you too." The redhead smirked and leant toward Miranda.

She looked smug but the ex-Cerberus agent knew better. "I want information. Just answer my question and we can forget each other."

"Ow, that hurts me, you know? I was rather sure I was unforgettable."

Flushing in frustration, Miranda wanted to growl. "Don't play coy. I know you're trying to waste my time."

Arachne was a beautiful, charming, and free-minded woman. People could fall for her easily but they just saw a mask. Deep down inside, the redhead was far worse than Jack.

"Don't look at me like that. You know you want me." She smiled seductively. Although Miranda didn't have an interest in women, she felt the urge to kiss those full lips.

_Focus, Miranda!_ Her subconscious warned her. Pushing the sultry woman off her, the ex-Cerberus agent finally came to her senses. _This woman is as dangerous as an Ardat-Yakshi, if not more._

"Should I tell the guard over there who you are? I bet she would be more than glad to put a bullet into the beautiful skull of 'The Blood Countess'."

Arachne's playful smile disappeared abruptly. "I have never eaten anyone."

"But you tortured them. How many children died in your experiments, Arachne? I can't believe the Illusive Man kept a child murderer like you at his side."

"We are the same." She stressed every word. "They are the same. Both people and animals are guinea pigs for us. Don't tell me there were no animals harmed during your projects."

"Your method is cruel, Arachne. I can't believe it. Dr. Arum was a good man. How could..."

"Don't you dare talk about my father!" The beautiful face distorted furiously. The redhead looked like a twisted hag. "He was a fool, threw his life and lifetime work away just to save three idiotic women. I'll tell you what. Those lives were wasted in vain. Now, they all died, and the stolen treasures return to their place."

Truth be told, Miranda knew that. She was just shocked to see her old friend talk about it so freely.

"You... What are you going to do with Shepard's child?"

Everyone thought she was perfect, but she wasn't. Her father had made sure she would never have a child of her own. That was the reason why she had done everything to make sure Shepard would be able to conceive after her resurrection. When Shepard told her about Butterfly, Miranda swore to help find the girl. It took almost a week to contact Arachne and travel to this planet. Although the woman admitted to her crime, this wasn't a victory.

The mission wasn't accomplished until Butterfly was returned to her family, safe and sound.

"What are you talking about?" Again, Arachne played dumb. "And... I think I should go. Unlike you, I have many things to do. Well, for old time sake, perhaps I ought to tell you. Around ten minutes or so, Kai Leng will show up. You better go, now."

She couldn't handle that bastard, she knew it. And all the guards in this station couldn't help her. No matter how much she hated it, leaving now was Miranda's only chance to survive.

"Before you go," the redhead called. "Remember one thing; our debt has been paid. Next time we meet, will be the last."

Raging, Miranda stormed out the station. She left just in time before the assassin arrived in the next five minutes.

"Shall we leave this freezing rock?" The man asked impatiently. "We have a long way to go. And everything you want is aboard."

"Oh, thank you." She smiled seductively, and Kai Leng was happy to oblige. "Lead the way, gentleman. It will be a long trip, but I think we can make it more... entertaining, in the meantime."

* * *

The space ship left the port. From afar, Miranda was looking. In her hands was a tracking device. Arachne didn't know she was carrying a tiny chip in her clothes.

"Soon, I'll find you, Butterfly. Just survive long enough,"

* * *

_This chapter is a bit short. You would see more of this blood countess in other chapter. True be told, I had so much joy writing her. Arachne was very eloquent and gorgeous but deadly. My kind of villain._

_As always, this story would not be this good without The Lonely Traveler. Thank a lot :D_


	21. The Grey

"In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west; people create distinctions out of their own minds and then believe them to be true."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**The Grey**

* * *

Amidst the chilly air, the fallen grey snowflakes tainted the red sky. Everything was covered beneath grey dust. There was no sign of living creatures.

Despite the cold and darkness, her legs were moving with their own purpose. Every step she took led her to an area of increasing darkness. In her mind, she could hear the whispers of people whom were now gone. They were calling for her.

However, those voices faded away when a figure appeared in front of her.

Was it... a girl? She was a child, but her skin and hair were grey. It looked like the grey snow had tainted her.

Shepard walked forward until she reached her tiny shoulders. With that touch, the girl slowly turned around.

As if the cold caught her unexpected, Shepard froze as she took a good look of that face. Her mouth gaped in shock.

It was Butterfly. But she wasn't the same. Her eye sockets that once contained those beautiful brown eyes were empty. Her pink lips were dried and grey. Her face was pale like a paper.

She looked like a husk.

_No. This was just a dream. This couldn't have happen!_

Although the eyeballs weren't there, she was still shedding tears. Shepard stared in horror as reddish tears flowed from those eyes.

In the next instant, she was floating in a stream of blood. The tide dragged her through a dark tunnel that soon became a giant tube. Through transparent material, she saw the end of the tube. It was connecting with a human reaper.

No, it wasn't. The face on that thing was... hers.

Shepard screamed.

Like someone who just had survived drowning, Shepard gasped for air. The familiar scent of eezo, blue lights, and the hard mattress, reminded her of the real world. She finally awoke.

"It was only nightmare," she told herself. "TIM would never turn her into a husk. She is too valuable."

_She won't be yours, when we're done with her._

Shepard's heart hurt when she remembered Kai Leng's words. They wouldn't turn her to a husk. But that didn't mean they didn't have another plan. Cerberus' advance technology brought Shepard back from the dead. She wouldn't put it past them to do the impossible.

With her arms around her knees, Shepard let her tears fall. She closed her eyes and then felt a familiar touch on her cheeks.

"Don't cry, mommy."

Instantly, the mother opened her eyes, half expecting to see her lovely daughter. She was of course, wrong. There was no one else in the cabin.

Was she losing her mind?

Ping! Shepard jumped at the noise, but realized it was just her alarm clock.

Right, she had people to save. Grissom Academy requested an emergency evacuation. Normally, the Alliance would take the job, but someone had deceived them with a turian signal. Luckily, Traynor and EDI discovered the signal was a fake.

Grissom Academy... Shepard sighed. She was tired but duty called.

* * *

_How dare him!_

Jack threw another Cerberus trooper out of her way. She had never been angry like this in her entire like, if that was possible. TIM dared to send his dogs to Grissom Academy, to abduct_ HER_ students. Hell, was it possible to hate that asshole more?

Dr. Kahlee Sanders, the headmistress had sent massages to the Alliance, but they hadn't come yet. Jack had seen other instructors killed and seen some students dragged (literally) away. And truth be told, she wasn't sure how long she could hold these bastards.

Her students were powerful biotics, but they were too young, inexperienced in real fighting. And their morale at the moment was not at its best.

Still, she had to stay strong. It was the first time in her life that she had someone to take care of. She wouldn't let her students down. Those sick bastards would never lay their dirty hands on_ HER_ students, not while she was still breathing.

The floor was shaking. Her blood almost froze as a giant mech marched into Orion Hall. _Shit, how did they bring that thing into the station?_

Her students were in danger. She stood her ground while her students ran to safety. Although she saw no way to win, she formed a biotic throw, ready to strike.

She heard an explosion. A bullet burst through the air, crashing the transparent panel in front of the Atlas' driver. It wasn't enough to destroy the mech, but enough to stop it and it gave Jack a few minutes to regain her strength

Her saviors came to view. She didn't know the hunky guy or the robot, but she knew their leader well.

"Shepard!" She couldn't believe her eyes.

The Alliance soldier with the big gun was the Girl Scout princess. Commander Shepard had come to the rescue again.

"No time to talk." Shepard waved her off. "Protect the kids. I'll take care of this."

Something was amiss. Jack sensed it but had no time or a chance to speak of it. More Cerberus operatives with heavier weapons marched into the hall. "Get them off our asses, Shepard."

There was no need to say it twice. The Commander and her squad marched toward the troops. On the balcony, the instructor formed a biotic barrier around the group of teenagers. From her point of view, she observed them fighting. The big guy was good with his gun while the sex bot was good with its tech. But Shepard...

The look on her face... She had seen it before, on Horizon. To be specific, it was when Shepard's old flame broke her heart.

This wasn't good.

Against a powerful biotic like Shepard, the Atlas didn't have a chance. She threw a large container to it and that knocked the mech off balance. James took the advantage of that and threw grenades into the fray.

The Cerberus troopers following the mech were thrown in every direction. The fallen Atlas had been finished by EDI. The rest of enemies didn't last long. A few foot soldiers weren't able to stop Commander Shepard, especially when she was angry.

_TIM just abducted my daughter, and now he sent his dogs to take more children._ Shepard was more and more furious.

When the last Cerberus operative fell, Jack made sure her students were fine before bringing down her barrier.

"Jack, is every...?" Shepard was cut off by a punch.

"I told you to not trust Cerberus," Jack barked. Her hand shook a little, but she ignored it.

"I never trusted them. And believe me. I'm going to kill them including the Illusive Man even if it's the last thing I do," Shepard growled back, fiercely.

What happened to the good Girl Scout? "I- can't wait for the show."

"Sorry, Commander," Cortez called via comm link, interrupting them. "Things are getting hot here. I can't stay for too long. You better hurry."

Shepard looked around, checking on the students. They looked tired. She doubted if they would be able to fight their way out. "We will find another way. Go back to the Normandy, Cortez. Kahlee, have any ideas?"

From the monitoring room in another part of the station, Kahlee answered through the comm. "We can escape with a Cerberus' shuttle. The landing port isn't too far. I'll meet you there."

"The door is locked." Jack said. "Those f... bad guys hacked it."

"I can override it. First, I need the camera but Cerberus hacked it. Commander, could you shut the signal down? There's a controller in Orion Hall, I believe." Kahlee asked, not noticing Jack's language.

James found the controller. But since he wasn't an engineer, he just threw it to the floor, kicked and stomped on it until it was crushed.

"Well, that saved time," EDI added.

Shepard rolled her eyes. "Kahlee, do you get the camera feed?"

"I got it. Ok, try opening the door. With some push, it should open," the headmistress answered.

The emergency evacuation began. Jack had taught her biotic students well. Although they had never fought in a real battle, they knew how to take care of themselves. They ate their energy juice and protein bars, and prepared themselves for the fight that was going to come.

"Ok, here's the plan. My team will take the lower floor and take care of Cerberus. Jack and the kids will run to the landing port using the upper levels. Remember, stay safe. Use your biotics only when necessary," the Commander ordered.

"Aye, aye, ma'am," the teenagers replied.

However, a voice interrupted them. Jack growled in anger when she heard that voice. It was Cerberus. They sent a message to everyone.

"Good students of Grissom Academy, we don't want to hurt you. The Alliance couldn't save you. Just surrender and you won't get hurt."

"Shut that off," the instructor commanded. "And change to another frequency."

"But... But what if they aren't lying?" One of the girls asked.

Everyone feared for their lives. Although she knew those words were a lie, Shepard understood why the girl was upset.

"Bullshit!" Jack swore. "Look at me, Rodriguez. These scars are evidence of what they have done to me. I was only a child when they used me as their lab animal. If you surrender, you will end up like me or worse."

Rodriguez swallowed hard. She thought those scars were from a fight. "Understood, ma'am. I won't let them take me."

"Good. Now follow the plan. See you at landing port, Shepard," Jack said.

The Commander nodded. However, her lips arched a little. Subject Zero had changed.

Her thoughts then went to Kaidan and Butterfly. But the memory of that lovely face turning to a horrible husk was still fresh. Shepard shook her head to banish the image.

"Commander?" EDI asked, worried.

_This isn't the time to break down._ She warned herself. "I'm fine, EDI. Let's go."

Behind them, James sighed. He didn't want to admit it, but he missed Butterfly miserably. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, perhaps.

* * *

I'm not so good with battle scene, so I just don't write it. Sorry if that didn't feel right.

Anyway, I can't finish this chapter without say thank to The Lonely Traveler. Lovely beta is lovely. XD


	22. Cocoon

"We delight in the beauty of the butterfly, but rarely admit the changes it has gone through to achieve that beauty."  
―_Maya Angelou_

* * *

**Cocoon**

* * *

A dress, high-heels and make-up, Shepard was glad Joker wasn't near her. She would never hear the end of it if the mouthy pilot saw her dressed like this.

At least the view was great. From the rooftop of AfterGlow; the most luxurious and expensive restaurant in the Citadel, the whole station appeared ethereal.

If only her shoes were more comfortable. Shepard fidgeted in her seat the whole time.

"Shut up," she groaned at the chuckling man at the opposite side of the table. How did he convince her to dress up? She had no idea. Though, he looked so damn handsome in a tuxedo.

Or was it because this was her first date? Most of the men she encountered never even offered her a drink. And that's why those relationships hadn't lasted.

After main course, the asari waitress brought a tray covered with a sliver lid. If Shepard's eyes hadn't deceived her, she believed she saw the asari wink at LT before she took her leave.

"Something's fishy," Shepard teased.

"Nope, it's just dessert," Kaidan said. He had his best poker face on but his mouth kept arching up into a lopsided grin.

"So why don't you open the lid?" Chocolate was her soft spot. Her lieutenant found out about it recently and used it against her often. _Too often,_ she thought.

The last time, he poured melted chocolate on himself and...

"Amala," Damn, he always knew when she was having inappropriate thoughts, and the way he said her name didn't help either.

"Can't we just skip this and go back to my apartment?"

Kaidan chuckled. "Tempting, but I have a surprise for you."

He opened the tray. Shepard gasped in shock as she saw a crimson box. However, the lieutenant didn't notice her reaction as he kneeled down in front of her.

"I know this might be too soon considering the Reapers and our duty." His face flushed crimson. "But I want to make sure... about us. I love you, Amala. Would you...?"

Clank! The silver tray on the table fell off the table as Shepard leapt out of her seat. It was a miracle she hadn't fallen on her face.

"I... I should go." As if the Reapers were chasing her, Commander Shepard ran off in fear, knocking everything out of her way.

She didn't hear Kaidan calling her name when the yellow cab took off from the restaurant.

* * *

"Interesting," A woman in a white suit pressed the pause button on her personal terminal. She smiled satisfied at the result of her project.

"The Project Caterpillar is progressing." She began recording an audio log. "That girl... The one Shepard calls Butterfly is very resourceful. When we scan deep into her brain, we found Shepard's memories. I had no idea that was possible. Perhaps the theory about the bonding between a mother and child has some possibility."

There was a small pause.

"We have to go deeper. But I must be more careful. The last subject went... blank when the Cocoon went deeper than the subconscious level. The Illusive Man would have my skin if that happened to the latest girl."

She paused and then looked up. In front of her was a tank. There was a word on a metallic texture, _The Cocoon._

Within the tank was a girl. Her face was covered with an oxygen mask to keep her from breathing the chemical fluid. All over her tiny body were tubes and censors. Several monitors were showing graphs of her body systems.

Everything looked normal. Heart rate and breathing were steady. However, her brain showed a great sign of activity. In a second, a cluster of bubbles formed around her face.

"You're dreaming, my pet?" The woman asked. Her test subject had a fragile physical body, but her mind was strong.

She had Shepard's strength and Alenko's stubbornness.

"Stop fighting," Arachne hissed. She always enjoyed breaking people, but it was also annoying. Besides, she didn't have much time. "You are nothing. Your parents don't want you. No one loves you. You hear me?"

The power went down for a second as the Cocoon shook violently. Graphs and other censors responded to the change. Arachne was amazed by the result. It was like a raging beast trying to uncage itself.

Butterfly's family was her strength, but was also her weakness. The scientist laughed like mad for her discovery.

"Little butterfly, you will become stuck in my web in no time."

* * *

Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta :D


	23. Two Sides of a Relationship

To be honest, I don't like drama. My mom knows I have too much drama in my real life. When it comes to my writing, I love to make it funny and bright. However, it seems I have to break my own rule sometimes.

I ought to warn you. This chapter is full of swearing because of Jack.

* * *

"The rule of friendship means there should be mutual sympathy between them, each supplying what the other lacks and trying to benefit the other."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Two Sides of a Relationship**

* * *

The Normandy was quiet. It felt like an abandoned ship although the crew was still on board. When Jack jumped off the shuttle, she knew something was amiss.

At Grissom Academy, Shepard and her team came to rescue her, the academy's staff, and students. The queen of the Girl Scouts did her job and saved everyone as usual, but that woman wasn't the same Shepard she knew.

She looked... hollow as if someone had ripped out her internal organs and left her bleeding to death. Jack didn't know what was going on but this was worse than Horizon.

"Shit," Jack cursed as she looked at the Commander as she left the shuttle bay. She hated seeing her only friend behave like the walking dead.

Kahlee Sanders, the headmistress of the school seemed to sense her frustration. The blond smiled knowingly at the younger woman. "It will be sometime before the Alliance's ship comes to take us. You ought to make yourself comfortable in the meantime. I'll take care of the kids."

"But..." Jack tried to protest. She too, was an instructor. Leaving her students for her personal business wasn't responsible.

_Shit_, it seemed Shepard's annoying goodness finally rubbed off on her.

"It's fine, really. You haven't seen her for half a year and only god knows how long before you see each other again. Just go talk to her, Jack. I know how it feels when you leave someone important without speaking your mind. Besides, I'm sure the Commander wants someone to talk to."

"Shepard is a big girl. I'm sure she can take care of herself."

"Your students can take care of themselves too. Don't worry too much," said the older woman.

When she put it that way, Jack couldn't argue. "You're a fussy old woman, Kahlee. But thanks anyway."

The headmistress just smiled.

* * *

Shepard felt the echo in her heart. She hated to come back from a battle just to return to an empty cabin. Butterfly used to greet her with a hug when she returned. Not anymore.

Butterfly... Her beautiful child who wanted nothing but be loved by the people she loved most. Alas, Shepard failed to grant the girl's simple wish.

Losing her daughter was bad enough, but the worst part was Butterfly probably believed her parents didn't love her. It was only a slip of the tongue. She didn't mean to say it. Still, the words did much damage.

Like a wounded animal, Shepard limped to her bed. She wanted something to remind her of Butterfly, but the girl almost hadn't had any possessions. Only her data pad was evidence of her existence.

Slowly, she did slide it open. The first thing she saw was a painting of a blue butterfly. Garrus was right. Her girl was a talented artist. The painting was lively although it was unfinished.

At the bottom right corner, there were letters.

_"Butterflies live short lives, but it's a life with grace and glory. Don't waste the time you have been granted in a void of hesitation, fear, or grief."_

Warm tears blurred the picture. She didn't know if those words were mean for her or not, but she couldn't stop crying.

It wasn't fair. Her daughter was with her only for two weeks, and they rarely spent time together. Too much time had been wasted; too many words were never said. Commander Shepard managed to ruin her life because of her hesitation, again.

Almost three years ago, Kaidan proposed to her. He hadn't rushed, just wanted to make what they had real. But she rejected him, stopped talking to him until the day the old Normandy went down.

_She was stupid._

On Horizon, she should have done something to ensure him that she was the same woman he loved, not a traitor. But the only thing she did was walk away. She even thought about moving on, forgetting him. It hadn't worked.

_She was stupid._

Her personal terminal beeped. Shepard almost jumped to it, hoping someone sent her news about Butterfly.

"Hey, A- Shepard," the soft voice called from the other end of the line.

It was Kaidan, and god she hadn't realized how much she missed hearing his voice. It had been four days since Cerberus abducted Butterfly, and they hadn't talked since.

"Hey, Kaidan," Something caught in her throat. Words wouldn't come out.

"I- I just wanted to tell you, Doc is going to let me out and... I accepted Udina's offer." He sounded troubled.

"Sorry, but what offer?"

A soft chuckle rang from the terminal. "I didn't tell you? Udina offered to make me a Spectre. I accepted it and... I'm going to leave the Citadel."

He was going to... leave her? "Why? Where are you going?"

"The only reason I became a Spectre is... I hope it helps me in searching for Butterfly. And the sooner I find her, the better."

"She is ours, Kaidan." Shepard felt the urge to cry, but swallowed them down. "I want to help you."

"I know. But you have a galaxy to save, so it's my duty to find her." His face in the monitor softened. If they had talked in person, she might have kissed him. "From what I know about Cerberus... I fear to think what they're going to do to her. I have to find her, Shepard."

If she didn't already hate her life, she hated it more now. Gently, she touched the monitor as if it was Kaidan. "I understand... Just promise me you will come back safely.

"I'll try." As always, his eyes held many emotions: love, longing, and hurt. "And I love you."

So many times, he said it but never once had she said it back. Should she repeat the same mistake again?

'_Don't waste the time you have been granted in a void of hesitation, fear, or grief.'_

"I love you too, Kaidan." She wouldn't be frightened anymore.

Obviously, the Major wasn't expecting to hear it. Still, he smiled. It was the same smile Butterfly gave her every time the girl was happy.

"I hate it, but I have to go now. I have something to look into before I leave tomorrow. If anything happens, you can call me." He paused for a while as if he didn't want to cut the communication.

However, he did eventually.

Shepard was still looking at the blank monitor. She hadn't pray since she was young, but she prayed to god for the safety of the people she loved more than herself.

"Shepard," EDI asked via the comm. "Jack want to talk to you."

Jack? Oh, she had almost forgotten about her. "Let her in, EDI."

The door opened and the tattooed woman walked in. She frowned at Shepard's reddish eyes. The Commander already had washed her face, but the remnant of her grief remained.

"What the hell happened, Shepard? You look like shit."

Shepard smiled. She knew Jack's attitude was harsh, but deep down she was a caring person. Their friendship was a bit sore at the beginning but eventually they became close friends.

She activated her Omni-tool to show Jack a picture of her daughter. Butterfly was riding on Wrex's back; beside them was a frightened Garrus who was worrying over the girl. Eve and Mordin were far behind. Still, they could see the female krogan smiling softly.

Jack's lips arched amused. "Who's this angel?"

"Angel? I never expected to hear that word from you, Jack. Usually, you say something like: "I'll destroy you."

"Oh, come on. I'm not that heartless. Besides, this girl is really adorable. She was getting along so well with your friends, I see."

"She is my daughter." Sighing, Shepard really wanted to talk about it. "It's a long story. If you don't want to hear..."

"I'm here because I want to know what in the hell is happening to you. Just tell me already." Jack made herself comfortable on the L-shaped sofa. She wasn't going anywhere soon, it seemed.

The Commander smiled. It felt good to have a friend to tell her troubles to.

* * *

Jack couldn't remember much about her life before Pragia. No matter how much she tried, the face of her parents had faded away from her memory. She couldn't forget those years she suffered in the Cerberus' lab. Of all people, she knew of Cerberus' true evilness.

That's why she accepted the Alliance's offer to become an instructor for biotic students at Grissom Academy. She wanted to make sure no one had to suffer as she did.

But this... this...

"Fuck," That was all she could say. Even by Cerberus' standard, reproducing a girl just to make her a tool was evil. And judging from Shepard's story, they definitely had done something to her.

"Yeah, the Illusive Man fucked up my life." Shepard agreed completely. "I know I'm not a good mother. Damn, the first thing that came to my mind when I knew I was expecting was how to get rid of my child!"

Being a mother scared the shit out of Commander Shepard. She wasn't made for civilian life. Besides, she didn't know how to handle a problem that wasn't solved with a big gun or brutal force.

Without Kaidan's knowledge, she'd planned to send her child away. She even thought about abortion. When she was struggling in space after the first Normandy went down, she hoped she'd died alone.

_It had done nothing wrong_. She realized in that moment. Boy or girl, her child deserved to live peacefully. She hadn't mentioned it after her resurrection. Shepard gave herself only a few moments to mourn over her lost child. It was her secret.

But Butterfly changed her. Like her father, the girl became Shepard's sanity. When Cerberus took Butterfly away, they also took half of her soul.

"But I love her so much."

The Commander never looked so broken, even after Horizon. Jack didn't like it. "So, what are you going to do?"

"My job is saving the galaxy."_ Damn it!_ "Kaidan will go after her. If I can, I want to go with him. She is ours. We're in this together."

Would her parents try to find her if they knew she had been abducted? Jack had learned from Cerberus intel that they declared her dead, so her mother had never known what really happened. However, at this point, it wasn't important anymore.

But Butterfly... They might still able to save her.

"Kahlee and the kids can take care of themselves for a while. At least until the Alliance decides what they want to do with us. In the meantime, I can do something entertaining like killing Cerberus."

"You want to help?"

"Why not? I bet we're going to march into Cerberus' lab. There are many of them to kill. How could I pass up the opportunity?" Still, Jack would never admit that she wanted to help the girl. No more subjects for those sick bastards to torture, not while she still alive.

"I... Come to think of it. Wrex or Grunt might be able to help." Shepard's eyes were glowing with hope. "I just saved Grunt and his unit from a Rachni a few days ago. Wrex and I have to go to Tuchanka, but he can lend me his men."

The battlemaster raged when he knew his niece had been kidnapped. If only they'd known where Cerberus kept Butterfly, Wrex would go after them no matter the cost. Surely, he would help Kaidan rescue the girl.

"See? You don't have to carry everything on your shoulders. We have to work together, right?"

After days filled with grief, Shepard laughed for the first time. "Good to know you listen to my speeches, Jack."

The other woman laughed bitterly. Still, she leant back in relax. "Yeah, laugh it up. I guess your attitude is finally rubbing off on me. Just... don't tell anyone."

"I promise. Anyway, I'll tell Kaidan about you. Wait, perhaps I ought to introduce..."

"Nah, no need. I know him." Jack cut her off.

Shepard raised her eyebrow.

"Major Alenko used to be an instructor at Grissom Academy. We used to talk a little before the Alliance called him back. Well, I have to admit I almost jumped him. He's good-looking and his asset is rather... unforgettable."

Her cheeks flushed red, as she laughed hard. _Kaidan's asset was remarkable, wasn't it?_"I'm really glad to see you again, Jack."

* * *

_From writer: I'm sorry I didn't reply your review Trishata96, because it would spoil this chapter. :) But yeah, I like Jack. She was only a girl who still cried for love and understanding. Sadly, things never been easy for her. In my paragon game play, she was like Shepard's little sister. Maddening one, though._

_And I would never go this far without help from The Lonely Traveler. I know I said it many times but I still don't tired to say it. Thank you again._


	24. Price to Pay

I have the feeling that someone is going to hate me for this chapter. LoL

* * *

"Hell is empty and all the devils are here."

_- William Shakespeare, the Tempest_

* * *

**Price to pay**

* * *

He hated loud noises.

Purgatory was the last place he expected to visit during his search for Butterfly. The lights were too bright and the music too loud. If he spent too much time in this bar, he would get a migraine.

He looked at his watch for the fifth time. His source still hadn't made their appearance. When he considered leaving, his Omni-tool pinged.

'Just how far would a father go for his child?'

_What the...?_

'I know where Butterfly is. But I cannot rescue her alone. We must act together.'

Three weeks of fruitless searching and now, a smidgen of hope but, wasn't it too good to be true? Kaidan felt unsure but answered the message anyway.

'Who are you? Why don't we talk in person?'

The answer came quickly. 'Shepard calls me an ally. But with your trust issues, I doubt if you would listen to someone who once worked for Cerberus.'

Kaidan thought he knew the identity of the mysterious ally. 'Miranda Lawson, is it? Amala told me about you.'

It took a while before the answer came. 'Does it matter? I have the coordinates. You can choose to go or not. If I were you, I would go there ASAP.'

'What do you mean?'

'Yesterday, Reaper troops tried to invade the station. They didn't succeed but the station was gravely damaged. It would be easier to invade the place while their reinforcements are low in numbers.'

It sounded fishy.

'I sent you the coordinates. The rest is up to you.' Without waiting for his answer, the connection ended.

The Major sat there for an hour. He didn't trust this mysterious ex-Cerberus agent, but it didn't look like he had any other choice. Like a drowning man, he would grab at anything he saw.

"Grunt, Jack," he called his squad. Shepard's friends volunteered to help him, but he still didn't feel comfortable walking around the Citadel with them. Perhaps it was because the krogan kept giving him a doubtful look, or because Jack seemed to enjoy ogling his backside.

However, they were powerful allies. With their help, marching into the Cerberus station didn't sound like suicide.

"Aye, Major," they answered via the communication link.

"Ready the ship. We'll take off in thirty minutes. I'll explain on the way."

The Argo was a gift from the Shadow Broker (pilot included). Kaidan didn't like to owe anything to anyone so he told Liara he was borrowing it. He was thankful, though. She was a beautiful, fast, and stealthy ship, the best money could buy.

She had no Thanix Cannon, however and the pilot wasn't as capable as Joker.

They needed a plan.

* * *

This place gave him the creeps especially since he now knew the station's name.

In Greek mythology, Lamia was a beautiful queen who became a child-eater because of her own wrath.

Kaidan explained its name to his squad, and Jack rolled her eyes.

"And you know Greek mythology? I can't believe it, you're such a nerd."

"What's a nerd?" Grunt didn't get it.

"Don't worry about it, Grunt," the biotic woman cut him off, "I don't think krogans have any nerds."

Kaidan sighed. He wanted Shepard here. "ETA Lamia station in five minutes. Ready?"

The Major piloted the shuttle disguised as Cerberus' into Lamia station. It wasn't as big as he thought and was too quiet.

"State your business," the guard asked when they were within radar range.

"Reinforcement. Requesting permission to land," Kaidan answered. He tried to sound like a Cerberus trooper.

They waited for an answer for an eternity. Jack was thinking about breaking into the station when the guard radioed back.

"Permission granted."

The three let out the breath they hadn't realized they were holding. It was impossible to break in by force since their shuttle had no guns.

"Our disguise will be useless when we drop off. Be ready to fight," Kaidan warned.

His squad nodded and readied their guns.

The shuttle landed on the landing pad smoothly. It had been year since he last piloted but Kaidan still had it. He didn't open the hatch until a group of guards came to investigate.

"What're you waiting for? We have a..." A Cerberus operative yelled but he didn't get to finish as he was killed by a biotic throw.

"Surprise, asshole!" As soon as the hatch opened, Jack jumped off the shuttle and attacked the first Cerberus she saw.

Trying to stop Subject Zero was useless. Kaidan rolled his eyes and followed the woman with Grunt in tow.

* * *

He couldn't shake the feeling that something was terribly wrong.

His mysterious source said the station was still damaged by the Reaper troops attack but he saw no trace of a battle. The place was too clean and too quiet. Cerberus should have stationed more men, more heavy weapons in this lab.

The voice in his head screamed: _Trap!_

However, the other side of his mind was sure Butterfly was on board. Kaidan couldn't explain it, but he had the same feeling he had when they'd met at the hospital.

_I'm coming, sweetheart,_the Major thought.

They were in a large hall when the door behind them slammed shut. In that moment, Kaidan knew it was a trap.

The panel above them opened and showed them the second floor. Behind the thick glass window, a woman in a white suit was looking at them like an empress looking down at the gladiators in the Coliseum.

"Greetings, Major," the redhead smiled as she ogled him, "Shepard has good taste in men, I must admit."

"I take it that you know me." Perhaps he should play along. Talking might loosen her guard and give them a chance. "Might I have the pleasure of learning your name?"

"That bitch is Arachne," Jack spited out, "She was in charge of Pragia before I broke out."

"Good to see you as well, Subject Zero. You haven't changed, really." Something in Arachne's eyes shone. "You thought bombing the lab would free you? Oh, no. You're always going to be the little girl crying at my feet for mercy!"

Crying in rage, Jack threw her dark energy at the woman. The glass wasn't even scratched.

"Do you really think I would face you again without any barrier? I'm not stupid, Subject Zero. This glass is the best credits can buy. It won't break by your weak biotics." Arachne's laugh only drove Jack's anger.

_This woman is crazy,_ Kaidan swallowed hard. _And she is probably in charge of the Caterpillar project. What has Butterfly endured by her hands?_

The Major tried to look for a way out, but the round hall had one entrance and exit. Perhaps if he broke the glass... He needed heavier weapons.

_A rocket launcher!_ Grunt was carrying it. Kaidan turned back only to find the krogan wasn't there.

As if she knew what he was thinking, the mad scientist said, "I'm so sorry, Major. But I hate aliens and krogans are on my top five of disgusting races list. So I won't allow your friend into our party. However, I'm not a rude host. My men will take care of him, elsewhere."

Crazy and racist, this woman was surely Cerberus' employee of the month.

Kaidan noticed Jack was shivering. "What's wrong, Jack?"

"You attended my parties before, Zero. Why don't you explain the rule to our guest?" How could a friendly smile be creepy? Kaidan had no idea.

Jack hated to follow Arachne's order, but she couldn't help herself. "In Pragia, children in the lab had to fight each other. There was only one rule: the winner is the survivor. Otherwise... they tossed the bodies into the wild. Fed the animals."

"What can I say? I'm an animal lover." Laughing like a maniac, Arachne was too proud of her madness. Still, she carried herself like a noble. They didn't call her the blood countess for nothing.

"Do you really we'll fight each other?" Kaidan wouldn't kill his squadmates to entertain this lunatic woman.

"No, no, no, I don't." She giggled dramatically. "Silly me. I almost forgot to introduce another attendee. Show yourself, Persis."

They saw a woman in a grey battle suit slowly appear as her cloak disappeared. Her suit was similar to the Phantoms, but Kaidan was sure Arachne wouldn't send a random soldier to kill them.

Persis? Was that the name of the youngest of Graeae? Someone seemed obsessed with Greek mythology.

"Persis will be your playmate. Well, I've heard you're quite the gentleman. But please don't go soft on her. Trust me. She'll kill you both in a few seconds."

Jack didn't wait for the signal. She threw dark energy toward the grey woman before Arachne finished her speech.

However, that was useless.

The grey woman disappeared. As the team tried to figure it out, she was behind Jack. With one swift slash, the tattooed woman flew across the room like a rag doll.

Kaidan automatically jumped backward. He shot Persis a few times but her armor and shield was very strong. His rifle knocked her back a little before she disappeared again.

"Kill him, Persis." From the upper floor, he heard Arachne order. "Kill him and your ordeal will be over."

_What did that that mean?_

He didn't have time to ponder. He had no chance to do anything but feel the sharp blade from behind as it thrust in him.

* * *

Somewhere in the galaxy, The Illusive Man was fidgeting in his chair. Waiting was an ordeal he hated most.

In front of him were screens that showed many things. One of them peeped and then the face he was waiting for appeared.

"Give me a report, Ms. Folic." He could no longer contain his excitement.

"Good news, sir." Arachne never talked idly with her boss. He was the only man she feared. "Persis passed the test. Major Kaidan Alenko is dead."

* * *

Teehee, plot thicken. XD By the way, I have to thank The Lonely Traveler for beta and advice.


	25. Seashells

"Have compassion for all beings, rich and poor alike; each has their suffering. Some suffer too much, others too little."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Seashells**

* * *

Shepard disliked the memorial wall. Every name on it reminded her of her mistakes, and in Ashley's case, her selfishness.

It was a dangerous mission. Everyone knew the risks. Shepard, of all people, knew she would have to make a difficult decision at some point. But she had never thought she would have to choose between her close friend and...

She told everyone she rescued Kaidan instead of Ashley because he was the superior officer. But it was a lie. The real reason behind her decision was she couldn't lose him.

Every time she looked at Ashley's nameplate on the memorial wall, she felt guilty.

Stepping back from the wall, she looked at the newest nameplate. Tears threatened to fall but she bit her lip to prevent them.

Garrus patted her shoulder. "He was a good guy."

"I shouldn't have let him go." Shepard hated showing weakness, but he had been her friend.

Seeing the Commander in this state made Garrus feel both sad and uncomfortable. It seemed the war was finally taking its toll on her.

"You should rest, Shepard." He didn't know what to do. "When was the last time you slept, or ate?"

Shepard shook her head. "I can't do either. Every time I tried to sleep, I have nightmares and I vomit everything I eat."

If this continued, Shepard might fall before the war ended.

"I think you should talk to Dr. Chakwas. You have to take care of yourself. We won't win this war without Commander Shepard."

_Garrus was always right._ Shepard smiled dryly and nodded.

"It isn't easy... I'll try."

The turian was still looking at his friend as she walked toward the med bay. She turned back to look at the nameplate for the last time.

On the plate was the name: Mordin Solus.

* * *

The pair of ancient hammers was drumming a battle symphony. Each time they rang, Shepard felt her heart drumming to keep up with the beat.

Far away, two ancient and powerful creatures were fighting. Kalros, the mother of all thresher maws grabbed the Reaper destroyer with her massive mouth. The Reaper fought back by tossing her against the Shroud. Her long body hit the skyscraper, causing an earthquake and explosion.

Wounded, Kalros loosened her grip and went back under Tuchanka's surface.

This wasn't the end. The Reaper looked around for the enormous worm, prepared for another round.

Shepard couldn't move as Kalros reappeared. The great mother hurled toward the Reaper with all her might. Her enemy tried to flee but it was too late. Kalros wrapped her body around the machine like a python. The Commander swore she could hear the sound of broken joints as Kalros tightened her embrace.

It didn't take long before the Reaper stopped moving altogether. The enormous worm dragged her prey underground with her.

Who would have thought? The worm had defeated the powerful machine!

Shepard had another task to finish. As soon as her legs remembered how to move, the Commander ran to the Shroud. Without the Convoy, she had almost lost an hour running her marathon toward her destination.

Mordin was already there, between the explosion and collapsing chaos. His face showed no emotion but his hands were dancing wildly on the console.

"Everything is ready. But the temperature is too high. Need to lower it down," the salarian said before she even asked.

"Okay, but how we do that?"

He smiled as he pointed upward. "The console is in the top floor."

"But the tower is collapsing!" If he went to the top floor, it would be a one-way trip. "There must be something we can do. Don't do this Mordin."

The Shroud had been sabotaged long ago. Their plan to spread the cure wouldn't succeed if they didn't get rid of that sabotage. Shepard understood, but she really didn't want to lose anyone.

"Has to be me," Mordin smiled.

Some time ago, he told her about his life. The doctor was in the last period of his life. He hadn't had much time left. If he survived the war, he wanted to go to the beach.

'Walk on the beach. Collect seashells.'

Tears fell down her cheeks, but Shepard ignored them. "Someone else might have gotten it wrong."

The good doctor nodded. "When Butterfly comes back, tell her... Grandpa's sorry."

"I will tell her. I promise." She saluted him until the elevator carried him away from her sight.

She didn't want to leave, but the collapsing building didn't give her a choice. Shepard ran from the building as fast as she able while the whole place fell.

* * *

Shepard jerked awake. Dr. Chakwas gave her a pill and promised a dreamless sleep, but it wasn't true.

She dreamed of Tuchanka. In her mission to cure the genophage, Mordin died. It was odd, though. A person from the race that created the virus sacrificed himself to cure it once and for all.

Eve or Urdnot Bakara said his bravery would be told among her people. Wrex even thought about naming one of his children after the salarian.

Mission accomplished, but there was no celebration. Somehow it didn't feel right.

"The krogans will go to war. It is the time we stop wasting our lives and do the best thing we can do and fight the giant monster," Wrex promised. "When Butterfly returns, bring her here and we will have a party. Urz would like her."

"Animals always are attracted to her. I don't think the varren will be an exception." Thinking about her daughter brought her a small smile.

Kaidan went after her and had lost communication. Shepard began to worry.

However, her train of thought was cut by a call. Via the intercom, Traynor informed her. "The Salarian councilor wants to speak with you, Commander."

That was... odd. Shepard had a bad feeling about the call.

* * *

Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta. o


	26. Death of a Caterpillar

"War is full of deception."

_- Sun Tzu, Art of war_

* * *

**Death of a Caterpillar**

* * *

It was hard to believe Cerberus would dare invade the Citadel in full force. But after they abducted Butterfly in daylight and almost destroyed the hospital in the process, Shepard shouldn't have been surprised The Illusive Man had ordered his men to bomb half of this place just to kill the councilors.

"They're moving," Commander Bailey said. "The turian, asari and Udina, they're still alive and kicking."

After she helped Bailey retake his station from Cerberus, the man helped her track down the councilors. His communication console was very useful.

"Someone is with them. I can't recognize the signal."

"What's about Valern, the salarian councilor?" Via vid comm, he told Shepard about the salarian's location.

"He is in the executor's office, probably. I can't track his signal, but the record says the office was his last known location."

"One councilor is better than none. I'll go get him."

"I'm on my way," Thane informed via the comm link. "Meet you at the executor's office."

It was said easier said than done. The way was blocked and Cerberus operatives weren't making it easier. Shepard had to fight her way through smoke and fire.

Through the C-Sec HQ, Shepard found bodies of C-Sec officers everywhere. They had all been unarmed.

"They had been taken by surprise," Garrus said to no one in particular. These people were his friends. Their death affected him greatly.

Shepard knew how he felt. When Sidonis betrayed him, causing his entire team's death, Archangel stopped at nothing for revenge. "Cerberus loves their sleeper agents."

"Like Mars?" James asked.

On the red planet, Cerberus' toy disguised itself as Dr. Eva Core who killed many Alliance marines and civilians. That tactic was effective. They might have gotten away with the Crucible's schematic if Shepard hadn't there to stop them.

The Commander nodded. Despite her hate for Cerberus, she admired their efficiency. If the Alliance were half as capable as Cerberus, her job would be a lot easier.

At the other side of the hall, a Cerberus centurion jumped from his cover. He was about to throw a grenade, but his head was blow off first.

Garrus was taken aback when he saw the sharpshooter. A human C-Sec officer was approaching them from behind a counter. Her eyes went wide in disbelief.

"Garrus, is that really you? Shit, I never thought I would be glad to see your shitty face again!"

The turian laughed. "I can say the same, Uri. You look like you've taken a beating."

Uri groaned, but not from frustration. Shepard noticed a wound at her flank and leg. "A shame, but true. After Cerberus' stunt at the hospital, instead of raising our security rate, the high officer told us to relax. He believed Cerberus wouldn't hit the Citadel twice. Not all of us believed him. Lucky me."

"Let's stop that blood first." The turian carried his old friend to the couch nearby. And then the Commander gave her a med kit before applying medigel on the wounds.

It didn't take long before Uri's face finally had some color. "Thanks, Commander. I want to help, but I don't think I can go anywhere right now."

It wasn't a surprise Uri recognized her. She was after all, the poster child for the Alliance.

"Don't push yourself too much. Just tell me, who is that high officer you mentioned?"

She snarled at that. "Who else? It's that Udina. I hope Cerberus taught him a lesson for being so reckless. A lot of us died because of him."

_That's odd,_ Shepard's gut told her. "How did this happen?"

"I'm not sure how it started. I was on break when I heard gunshots." The C-Sec officer pointed at the next room. "I grabbed my gun and ran here. But, well, my pistol didn't stand a chance against them. I might have died if not for my shield. Still, one of those bastards used a grenade. The force knocked me out for a while. They probably thought I was dead, so they didn't finish me off."

"You're a lucky bitch, Uri," Garrus chuckled softly.

The woman returned the gesture. However, their body language seemed... more than friends. The lieutenant couldn't help wondering.

However, he knew enough to wait for the right time to ask. He respected the turian.

They had to leave Uri there after Shepard informed Bailey of the survivor. He was wounded himself but still looking out for his men. He promised to send the medic in as soon as possible.

The door to the other room was jammed. When Shepard was busy hacking the lock, James took the chance.

"So... you and Uri?"

Garrus knew where the question was leading. Still, he enjoyed giving the human trouble. "What are you talking about?"

"Come on, Scars. You know what I mean." James didn't give up.

"Focus on the mission, kid. I won't tell you anything." Unfortunately, the turian wasn't the 'kiss and tell' type.

"So you and her... Geez, I didn't know humans and turians could..."

"Keep it in your pants, lieutenant." Shepard chimed in. She didn't know humans and turians could be intimate either, but kept it to herself.

It didn't take long before the door opened. They advanced through the complex building and Cerberus' army. The Commander had almost reached the Executor's office. She just needed to open that damn door.

Someone had sealed the Executor's office door with a very complex lock. Even though, Garrus was better in technology than Shepard, he still needed some time to unlock it.

"Why don't we just blow it up?" The lieutenant was a bit annoyed.

Shepard reread the map. Beyond this door was a cafeteria. On the upper floor was the Executor's secluded workplace. She couldn't hear anything through the walls or door. She doubted the people inside were still alive.

"Because I don't want to alert anyone inside. Surprise attacks always work."

If Cerberus intended to kill the councilor, they would be here sooner or later.

"Got it!" The turian finally exclaimed. "This is the most complex lock I have ever hacked. Even Tali would have had a hard time unlocking it."

"Seriously?" Shepard said.

She didn't have time to consider it. As soon as the door opened, an incredible sight greeted the soldier.

Two shadows were jumping around the hall. No, the expression 'jumping around' was an understatement. They were flittering while dueling with blades. In the age where people relied on guns, it was rare to see this kind of fight.

Shepard gripped her gun tight as she saw one of the duelists. It was the bastard who took Butterfly from her and also killed Marian White.

Kai Leng,

Another one was a woman. Her whole face was hidden beneath a mask. On her grey tight suit was Cerberus' logo.

But they were fighting against each other. What was happening?

The woman was shorter but swifter. Her shorter dual monomolecular blades also gave her an advantage in close distance. Her attacks were fierce and murderous. All Kai Leng could do was deflecting her blades, when each hit did more and more damage.

At the far side of the room, an ex-assassin and the salarian councilor were hiding behind a pile of chairs. They were too exhausted to move from their spot. Thane looked like he was also in need of medical attention.

Shepard told her team to stop. She didn't know who that woman was, but the enemy of her enemy was her friend.

Kai Leng noticed the newcomers. He lost focus only a split second but that was enough for the other duelist to whirl her blades through his shield.

_Clank!_ The Commander gasped as the assassin's right arm flew across the room. His blood was flowing like a fountain. When the woman drew her blades again, the wall nearby was painted in crimson.

Almost, just almost... The cut started from his right shoulder to his sternum, almost split his body by half. A normal person would have died, but The Illusive Man made sure his bodyguard was tough enough to survive anything. He was still alive while the winner kneeled down to whisper in his ear.

"Bitch!" He spit back. "Fuck you and your M...

A fist hit his cheek, knocking a few teeth out. More blood caught in his throat as he tried to breath. His cybernetic implants would keep him alive for some time, but they had limits.

"Didn't your mother ever teach you to watch you language? Hmm, I wonder if you ever had one."

That voice... Shepard swallowed hard. It almost sounded like a feminine version of Kaidan's.

"No offense, Lola. But she sounds like you." James whispered. After a pause, he added. "That ass is hot."

However, before the masked woman could do anything more, Thane coughed. The salarian exclaimed in panic. "Lady, the drell is coughing blood!"

Shepard and her squad ran to them, but were still slower than the mystic woman. She gave him a dose of medicine. When the man's breath became slower and calmer, she cradled his face in her hands.

"Don't leave yet. I didn't save your life just to let you die like this."

"Atma..." Thane smiled. "You grew up beautifully."

_Atma? Didn't he call Butterfly that? No. It couldn't be..._

"I'm flattered. But rest now, ok? The medic will be here soon." She hugged him before she helped him lay down.

They didn't seem to notice Shepard. It was the councilor that greeted the Commander first.

"Commander Shepard, glad to see you!" He didn't move, though. "We're doomed, but you still might be able to stop it."

"What do you mean?" Shepard asked, keeping her eyes on the masked woman.

"Udina is a traitor. He's working with Cerberus," he said. "They sent an assassin after me. Thanks to this lady and the drell, they saved my life."

"Then, the other councilors are still are in danger." She always had to save those councilors, didn't she? True be told, she hated doing this. After all she had done, they still didn't trust her. Should she care about their safety?

The masked woman was silent throughout the exchange. She waited patiently until they were done. "There're more assassins. One of them is more dangerous than Kai Leng. We need to hurry."

"Wait a minute." James stopped her. "I don't mean to sound ungrateful or anything. But who are you?"

She chuckled. The lieutenant had a strange feeling that he had heard that sound previously. "The enemy of your enemy is your friend. At this point, you can consider me as such. Don't worry. We'll have plenty of time for introductions later."

"At least, can you tell me your name?"

Strange, that simple request made her pause. "I... You can call me Atma."

It wasn't his call to make. James looked at the Commander and waited for her decision.

She was upset, obviously. The woman said she was their friend, but she was still wearing Cerberus' uniform. Although she helped save the councilor, it still didn't mean she could be trusted.

"Tell me why I need your help," Shepard finally asked.

"You don't," she admitted easily, taking them off guard. "But I can make your life easier, a lot easier."

_A friend in an unlikely place?_ Shepard met a lot of this kind of allies, but this one...

"You're wearing Cerberus' uniform. How can I trust you?"

The other woman tilted her head. "Cerberus and I had had a run in. And I didn't have time to find new armor."

That gesture... Garrus thought he had seen it before. This woman was too familiar for his comfort. "Shepard, I think we can trust her." But he would keep his eyes on her, closely.

Shepard and Vakarian trusted each other's advice. She knew what he really meant and answered with a quick nod. "Alright, you can come. But we need to move now."

* * *

Before I began my grumbling, I have to thank my beta: The Lonely Traveler. Your encouragement makes my day. :D

Alright, let's the grumble begin.

It's must be my imagination, but I think I see other stories those share similar concept with Butterfly's dream. Whatsoever, I'm sure my Butterfly is more adorable. In fact, I sketched some of her and her family's picture. Too bad, I have no scanner. I tried to take a picture with iPhone but it didn't look so good. I hope Santa clause give me a scanner for Christmas.

Nah, I'm kidding. I just have to do something with my laziness and make a trip to convenient store, that's all.


	27. Beneath the Candle

"Three things cannot be long hidden: the sun, the moon, and the truth."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Beneath the Candle**

* * *

True to her word, Atma was resourceful. She had a car ready. Shepard decided she would drive, despite her squad's dismay.

Atma chuckled and shook her head softly.

But TIM and his men were stubborn. As soon as the car leaped into the lane, four cars came out of nowhere and flanked them from four directions. One of the cars opened a door. Shepard's heart almost leaped out from her chest as she saw a gun turret aiming at them.

Instantly, she grabbed her pistol. But Atma opened the hatch above. The Commander heard shouting.

"Don't shoot that woman!"

_But why? Who is she?_

Atma wasn't listening to them. She shot the driver with a sniper gun. That shot sent the car crashing.

"Man down!" A Cerberus operative exclaimed. "Put her down, but don't kill her."

"Not even in your dreams," Atma said. She shot another car at its fuel tank. However, two Phantoms jumped off the car before it went down.

Shepard heard a loud 'thud' on top of their car.

"Keep driving," Atma ordered.

James yelled and tried to lean out the window. His structure wasn't built for narrow cars. He was stuck until Garrus pulled him back in the vehicle.

"Enjoy the view, lieutenant?" Shepard said.

The man rolled his eyes. "You should see it yourself, Lola. It's the most terrifying cat fight I've ever seen."

The noise from above and her very bright imagination gave her an idea. A sharp blade stabbed through the roof, seconds later. James screamed like a little girl as it missed his nose only by a few centimeters.

"This is annoying!" She heard Atma shout.

The other two cars weren't going to leave them alone. The one flying ahead started shooting. Shepard had to evade. Their car swayed like mad but the fight still continued.

A loud biotic boom, and then a Phantom floated away. Shepard stared in horror as another Phantom was thrown against the nearby building.

Atma jumped back to her seat. She didn't say anything.

Unfortunately, the damage from the 'cat fight' was more than the sky car could handle. They fell down quickly, despite Shepard's control.

"Hold on, people! Ready for an emergency landing."

"Again?" Garrus yelled. "This is worse than the Mako. Next time I'll drive."

"Shut up!" Shepard yelled back.

Despite the situation, Atma laughed.

It wasn't easy to fight the gravity, especially when they were getting shot at by two cars. Shepard landed on the nearest pad. They were lucky the car hadn't exploded.

The women jumped out off the car, but the two gentlemen didn't look so good. Garrus looked rather pale himself as he patted James' back as the lieutenant threw up his breakfast.

"Motion sickness?" Atma asked. She seemed worried.

James was a flirt. He didn't like showing weakness in front of women, so he tried to act tough. "It's nothing, Princess. I just... It's better when I'm in control. I'm used to wild rides and the girls love it."

Despite her mask, he tell she was blinking, probably confused.

_Not the smutty type, I see._

"Princess, hah!" There was a small laugh in her sexy voice, which sent a familiar heat straight to his groin. The lieutenant couldn't help but steal a glance at Atma's perfect body. Her boobs were ample. Those hips were fit and firm. And those legs... What would it feel like when they...?

_Damn, this one is even hotter than Lola,_ James thought.

She didn't notice his leering. Atma followed when Shepard ordered them to move on.

It wasn't long before another Cerberus troop found them. Angrily, the Commander made her path through the battlefield with her biotics and gun. She stopped half way when the Atlas swooped down.

_Shit, they brought the giant mech!_

Shepard jumped to cover as she saw the Atlas powering its rocket launcher up. Back in the STG base, she was almost killed by another of these mechs.

Boom! The rocket hit her cover. Shepard felt the ground beneath her feet shake violently. The launchers always took time to reload. This was her opportunity to strike back.

"Garrus, overload it," The Commander ordered.

The turian did as he was told. The Atlas' armor went down. His overload knocked the mech backward.

But that wasn't enough to destroy the mech. Shepard leant from her cover to shoot it but she found the Atlas had already exploded. Atop of the machine, Atma stabbed the driver through the glass canopy and floated back to the ground.

She could float with biotics!

Atma's biotic field was so dark, almost black. Shepard had never seen anything like this before.

The Commander wanted to ask. But before she opened her mouth, Atma flashed toward to her in lighting speed. Shepard saw a gleam of a blade in front of her.

Seconds later, Shepard heard a loud clank. Atma stood in front of her.

A familiar feeling shivered along Shepard's spine. She looked up and found a shuttle flying away, but this one had brought another woman in a grey suit.

She was far, but she could see a black widow in the woman's hand. Did Atma just save her from the sniper?

"I'll free you, sister," Atma said as her eyes followed the shuttle.

Curious, Shepard asked. "You know that woman?"

Atma said emotionless. "I'll tell you everything, after we drive these pyjaks off here."

Pyjak... Why did she speak like a krogan?

"Come on. Let's move. That won't be the last of her. We need to hurry if you want to catch up with the councilors before they did," Atma urged.

"They have a shuttle." Shepard hadn't given up though. She tried to think about another way.

Atma shrugged. "I have a surprise for them."

_I hate surprises,_ Shepard mentally grumbled.

_Boom!_ A loud explosion almost paralyzed her. Commander Shepard knew it was a rocket launcher.

"Oops," Even with the mask, Shepard could tell Atma was smirking.

The Commander began to like her.

The two men didn't have a clue. James looked slightly panicked as he looked through his rifles scope to take a better look of the smoke.

"What the hell is happening, Lola? Is that a rocket launcher?"

"It is. But I wonder if it was enough to stop her." It was strange. Atma sighed as she mentioned the other woman. "Let's assume we slowed her down. Now, we better move."

Garrus and James looked at the Commander questioningly. The masked woman was a mystery but somehow she looked familiar. They just couldn't wrap their minds around it just yet. And Shepard shared their confusion.

_Questioning was for another time,_ Shepard thought. They were in a battlefield. No time for chitchat. "You heard the woman. Let's go."

* * *

_How many floors does this building have?_ Shepard thought angrily. The elevator seemed to take forever to reach to the top.

Sighing, the Commander stopped staring at the ceiling and looked around. In the small space, the squad and the mystery guest stood in silence. Nobody was talking or looking at one another.

Shepard took the opportunity to observe Atma. The woman was shorter than her by only a few centimeters and in some way looked younger. She was very skilled. But her abilities were a bit... inhuman, and her relationship with Cerberus still unclear.

_Can I trust her? Oh, now I sound like Kaidan._ Shepard scoffed.

The elevator stopped. They had finally reached the top floor. According to Bailey, the councilors were here. They probably would try to take the shuttle from the landing pad.

And Udina was still with them. Whatever was on other side could be another surprise. Shepard signaled her team to ready their guns.

Atma didn't move.

In a hurry, Shepard didn't notice. She moved to landing pad with her gun raised.

She was indeed met by a surprise.

Near the pad, the two councilors were talking with one other. As far as she could tell, they looked safe and sound. Udina didn't look so comfortable. The man was on his knees, hands on his head. He was complaining but Jack threatened to kick his ass if he didn't shut up.

There was a man in blue armor in the shuttle. He was working on its console. Shepard couldn't see his face under the blue helmet. Her interest was focused in the traitor.

It was kind of amusing to see the man squirm. Udina was a pain in the ass. But Shepard wanted to know what had happened.

"Jack, what are you...?"

Her question was cut off as the man in blue armor walked towards her. When he was close enough, Shepard finally recognized that armor.

"Kaidan, what are you doing here?"

The man took his helmet off. But his smiled swiftly changed direction. The Commander gasped in shock as Atma hurled into his waiting arms. They seemed... very well acquainted.

Shepard saw red. She wasn't the jealous type but...Kaidan was her territory! "What do you think you're doing?"

Kaidan blinked, before looking down at Atma who was snuggling on him like a happy pup. "You didn't tell her, Princess?"

_Princess!_ If she was angry before, now her blood boiled with rage._ He never called me that. Who in the hell is this woman?_

"It's a surprise," Atma answered childishly, despite the situation.

Laughing and shaking his head, the Major helped her take her mask off. Atma's long wavy raven hair sprung in the air beautifully. Shepard wondered how she could keep it beneath the mask.

James felt his fingers itching. They wanted to comb through that silky smooth hair.

The woman turned around and that face shocked them. The Commander gasped like a fool as her eyes explored the heart-shaped face, brown eyes, perfect nose, and full lips.

Most of Atma's face was similar to Shepard's, but she had Kaidan's eyes and nose.

"Surprise?" Raising her arms, the woman smiled cheerfully. "Do you remember me, mommy?"

"You..." Shepard felt her world had turned upside-down. Her head began to spin. "You're Butterfly!"

And then, she passed out.

* * *

Not a big surprise, I think. By the way, the explanation is in another chapter. :3

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta. You're a good conspirator.


	28. Compromise

"Well, I must endure the presence of a few caterpillars if I wish to become acquainted with the butterflies."

_- Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little Prince_

* * *

**Compromise**

* * *

Shepard woke up with a terrible headache. She felt like someone had hit her head with a sledgehammer. It had been so long since she had woken up with the same feeling. If her memory served her well, the last time was after Eden Prime.

When her eyes finally focused, she saw the same face.

"Dr. Chakwas, I think she's waking up," Kaidan called the good doctor. He was still wearing his armor.

Her eyes didn't want to open yet. Shepard groaned and rested her head back on the pillow. "Kaidan... Where am I? And where is...?"

"Don't try to think too much, Commander," The doctor warned. "I know how you feel. We all do."

"Yeah," The younger woman moaned. She was sure the crew would be shocked when they saw Butterfly. It had only been a month but her daughter had grown up. What had Cerberus done to her?

"Physically, you're fine. But you have too much stress. It's better to rest for a while longer." Chakwas collected her tools, preparing to leave. She stopped to talk to the Major. "I'll go back to the Normandy. If you need me, just call."

"Thank you, Doc." He nodded politely. It had been years since he served in the same ship with her. But old habits die hard. He still couldn't disobey the doctor.

Shepard's eyes followed her. The Commander saw Butterfly escort Chakwas to the door. The doctor wanted to pet the girl's head but her hand stopped awkwardly half way. They stared at each other until Butterfly made a move and hugged her grandma.

Chakwas gasped and stood dumbfound. It took a while but she finally hugged the girl back. She cried a little as she kissed Butterfly's forehead.

"Are you coming with me, Butterfly?" The doctor asked.

"Mommy and daddy still need to talk." Despite her voice, Butterfly still spoke like a baby. Shepard wasn't sure if it was a good thing. "Until things settle, I should stay here, I think."

She glared at the Commander and then sighed. Butterfly's parents were the most stubborn couple. They spent a lot of time yelling at each other, and the rest of the time making up.

"Alright. But if you need anything, just call me or anyone on the ship, okay? Your uncles and aunts are dying to see you again."

The news spread like wild fire. When Garrus and James returned to the Normandy, they answered many of the crew's questions. It was hard to believe that a lost baby returned as a beautiful woman. Most of the crew still wondered if she was really Butterfly or another of Cerberus ploy.

No one ever thought Butterfly would have Kaidan's nose. It made her looked a bit manly.

_She reminds me of Ashley,_ Chakwas thought.

Butterfly walked Chakwas out the door, so Shepard didn't hear more of their conversation. Her eyes returned to the man on the foot of her bed. Kaidan looked slightly tired but still handsome.

"I know you." He interrupted before she could say anything. "You want to talk. But I think you need food first."

Her lips arched up on their own. They both were biotics. Their metabolism was extraordinary; they had to eat more than regular people. She was lucky Kaidan could cook. He wasn't a chef but she loved his creations.

The Major left the room. Shepard heard him taking off his armor. Shepard sat up a little to look around. This was her apartment in the Citadel.

Kaidan came back with a tray of food. He cocked his eyebrow at the blushing Commander on the bed.

There was no need to say anything. She knew what he was asking. "I just... was thinking. This bed might be where...Butterfly was conceived."

Kaidan patted the back of his head awkwardly. This was a delicate matter. Last time he let rude words escape his mouth before thinking and things went horrible. He wasn't sure what to say this time.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said what I said on Horizon."

But Shepard shook her head. "We both made mistakes. I shouldn't have said anything when I was angry. If I didn't let my temper get the best of me, Butterfly would never..."

It was no use talking about the past. Kaidan placed the tray on the bed. "You were out for hours. Let's eat something before you pass out again."

"Omelet?" How long had it been since she ate real food? Long enough to make her miss it terribly. "Where did you get the ingredients? No one has lived here for years. I thought the utensils were all lost."

"Butterfly, Jack, and Miranda went shopping while you were out. Not every shop in the Citadel is closed. Besides, they wanted to get Butterfly out of that Cerberus uniform ASAP." He said it like it was normal happenstance. But Shepard felt her head spin.

"Wait. Can you start at the beginning? Jack and Miranda went shopping together and both of them came back alive? Wow, that's a miracle."

"Butterfly is your daughter. She knows how to make people compromise." Chuckling, Kaidan leant toward her a little. Shepard could see his arm moved at an odd angle.

"You're hurt. What happened?" Unconsciously, she touched his shoulder.

The Major caught her hand, but only to place it above his chest. "I better start from the beginning. Umm, it was about five days ago."

Shepard's eyes grew wide as she listened to him. She couldn't scold him for falling into the trap so easily. In his shoes, she might have fallen for the trap, as well.

"Truth be told, I thought I had died. But I woke up again in the Argo. Miranda rescued Jack, Grunt, Butterfly, and me. She could tell you more details on the rescue." It still felt like a miracle, though. In the moment he saw the blade run through his chest, he thought it was the end.

She touched where he was stabbed gently. "But how could you survive?"

"The blade didn't cut through my vital organs. Besides, the cut was small and neat so I didn't lose much blood. For Miranda, my condition wasn't a big deal."

She had almost lost him and that scared her shitless. "I'm glad she saved you. I would be lost without you, Kaidan."

Kaidan smiled. He leant forward to capture her lips but there was a knock on the door.

"Mommy, daddy, can I come in?" Butterfly asked from the other side. She didn't open the door but Shepard heard someone talking with the girl. "They're making out? What does that mean?"

"Jack!" She knew it. "Don't pervert my daughter."

The door opened, revealing a bewildered Butterfly and a pouting Jack. "She needs to be educated, Shepard. In this body, people will treat her like a grown-up. Bad guys always take advantage of innocent girls. I just gave her necessary info."

But Miranda pushed them into the room. "Technically, she is a baby. It's too soon to teach her such things."

Jack wanted to counter with the f word. But Butterfly was watching so she swallowed the insult down.

For that, Shepard was grateful. "Worry about that later, Jack. Now I want to know your part of story. Kaidan told me about what happened in Lamia station. I still don't know the specifics of Miranda's part. And I'm dying to know what happened to Butterfly."

"I don't have much to tell." Jack sighed. "That Persis beat me. I was out until the cheerleader woke me up."

"So, Miranda..." Shepard turned to the ex-Cerberus agent.

"I traced Arachne to that station, but I couldn't walk in that place alone so I tried to contact Major Alenko. But Arachne got to him first."

That woman lured him into the trap. "But who's Persis?"

Butterfly's face dropped when she said that name. "She is... another me."

"What? But Marian said... the other two died."

"She'd been deceived." Miranda opened the video from her Omni-tool. "I followed Major Alenko when he broke into Lamia station. While Arachne was busy with him, I sneaked in to rescue Butterfly and Grunt."

The krogan didn't need rescuing, though. By himself, Grunt gave Cerberus a hard time. From the security footage, he was fighting Cerberus troops alone and seemed to enjoy it.

"His rant distracted the guards and gave me a chance to sneak in the lab." She played another video.

In the lab, Butterfly was sleeping on a surgery bed, face on the pillow. Shepard was sure her daughter had been implanted recently.

"I wasn't sure it was her at first. So I hacked Arachne's terminal for infomation. Her journal said she used the Cocoon to increase Butterfly's growing rate. That machine is my father's invention."

That couldn't be a coincidence. "He is working with Cerberus?"

"Yeah, I think so." Miranda looked disturbed. "I fear Oriana's absence is his doing. If the Illusive Man is backing him up, he will be unstoppable."

"If there's anything I can help with..." Shepard offered. She wanted to repay Miranda.

"I'm afraid I need your help. But that is for later."

The footage showed Miranda untying the bonds on Butterfly's legs and arms before covering her naked body with a white sheet. The girl fought at first but started crying when Miranda spoke to her.

They spent a few minutes looking for armor and a weapon for Butterfly before joining Grunt. Butterfly jumped in the fray without hesitation. Her biotics painted the station with Cerberus blood.

She was furious.

They then entered a large hall. Shepard stiffened as she saw Kaidan lying lifeless on the floor. If she had been there, she probably would have thought he was dead. Arachne probably thought the same.

As soon as Butterfly saw her dad, she growled and hurled toward Persis. She disarmed her twin and engaged in hand-to-hand combat. Their movements were inhuman, so swift and agile. They were very capable like they had practiced those moves for centuries.

As the genetic twins fought each other, Grunt destroyed the glass window with his rocket launcher. Arachne hit a red switch and then called Persis to retreat.

Persis threw a smoke bomb on the floor and took the opportunity to jump up to the upper room. The footage ended when the two ran through the back door.

"Arachne hit a self-destruct button. Thankfully, Butterfly hacked the system and stopped the explosion. I savaged a lot of information from Lamia station. Most of it useful. I'll upload them to your tool."

With a flick of the hand, the ex-Cerberus agent sent the information to Shepard's tool. Although the Commander had a bad feeling, she looked at the file's name.

"This is... project Caterpillar."

Shepard felt Kaidan's hand on her. He made the unspoken promise they would pass through this together.

She squeezed his hand in respond.

"Oh, come on." Jack said with disgust. "You lovebirds can get a room later. Now we have business to attend to."

Blushing, the Major released Shepard's hand. "Most of the flies are encrypted. It took us a few days to learn of their plan to invade the Citadel."

"But neither of you sent me news." Shepard hated it when she was left in the dark. "I didn't even know it was Butterfly when I first saw her."

The girl smiled dryly. "Sorry mommy. I just thought it was funny joke."

She was still a baby. It was comprehensible she didn't think about the consequences. Shepard sighed.

"I understand. But Major Alenko should have told me."

"I almost died, Amala. Even though, the stab wound wasn't a mortal, Miranda spent days and nights putting me back together. This morning was the first time I left the bed but I had to hop to the mission immediately. I didn't have time to contact the Normandy, let alone tell you about Butterfly."

Well, he had a point. Although Shepard was still annoyed, she knew it was childish to keep blaming someone for what happened. Commander Shepard wasn't supposed to behave like that. "Miranda, are you sure B is well? She recently had her implant installed. I know I felt horrible after the surgery."

Instead of answering the question, Miranda turned to Jack. "Butterfly hasn't had her lunch. Can you take her to the kitchen and find something for her to eat?"

The tattooed woman was going to protest, but she realized and took the hint. "Oh, right. Come on, girl. Let's see if your handsome dad didn't wolf all the pizza down."

Butterfly looked at each of them doubtfully. She probably knew they just wanted her to leave. She just nodded and followed Jack.

They waited until the door closed.

"So, is there something you can't talk about in front of B?"

Miranda rubbed her face with both hands. "I can't call it bad news, but I don't consider it good news either. It's about the implant in Butterfly's head."

Instantly, Shepard looked at her boyfriend.

"I saw the file. The implant is the newest model. But it isn't an L6." Kaidan began. "Despite the side-effects, the L2 is the most effective Bio-amp for humans. So Conatix Industries had planned to redesign the L2 model."

"The prototype is impressive." Miranda sighed. "It's even more powerful than an L5. Bad news is... it also spikes harder. So, they aborted the project."

"But TIM had another idea." Shepard guessed. That bastard always knew how to ruin people's lives.

The ex-Cerberus agent nodded. "Cerberus stole the schematics and developed the prototype. Ten men had been implanted and they were just... There were reports about hearing voices, hallucinations, and faulty memories. This model is worse than an L2."

"And they planted that 'thing' in my daughter's head!" She had just gotten Butterfly back but she might lose the girl again to something she couldn't control.

Kaidan pulled her close for a hug. He knew how she felt. "I'm sure someone can take it out. Don't panic, Amala."

He was right, wasn't he? It wouldn't be easy but someone might be able to help. She wished Mordin were still alive. That bright scientist could solve any problem.

"I hope I can help. But I still have my own problem. Oriana is still missing and my father is planning something terrible. He needs to be stopped." Miranda said. "However, we can't assume that amp is dangerous. Persis has the same model and she is still...mostly aware of her surroundings. I guess the Major's DNA had something to do with it."

"There were three clones, right? We all know Persis and Butterfly, but what about the third one?"

Shepard felt Kaidan hold her tighter. He was upset.

Kaidan started, "Whatever Arachne did to Dino, it left her brain dead. Right now, she is a vegetable. They keep her alive with a machine. I thought about turning it off but... She is ours and a decision we should make together."

Although Dino was their daughter, neither of them knew her. Shepard almost felt like they were talking about a stranger.

"If you're sure we can't save her, I think we should let her go."

No one deserves to live like that. Kaidan understood. "I'll take care of it."

He knew she didn't want to see Butterfly's clone. What did she do to deserve a man like him? "Thanks, Kaidan."

This time, it was Miranda who was getting annoyed. "Should I wait outside? At this rate, Butterfly will have a sibling soon."

The couple blushed.

Miranda continued, "Cerberus named the model implant Mati." The ex-Cerberus agent frowned.

"In Greek, Mati means evil eye." Kaidan really didn't like it. "I have a feeling we should take it out of Butterfly's head quickly."

"Then, perhaps we should go to the hospital now. I can't risk Butterfly's sanity. The doctors might know how to save her." She couldn't lose her daughter again.

"Dr. Chakwas told you to rest, remember?" the Major stopped her by pushing her back to the bed. "Be good and follow the doctor's order. I'll take care of things while you're sleeping."

"But... Alright, I'll sleep. But I still have questions."

He knew her better than anyone, so he didn't bother to argue. "Ask away, ma'am."

Shepard didn't like it when he called her that. But she knew he was just making fun of her. "What about Udina? How did you know he was partially behind the coup?"

"Because... whatever happened on Lamia station was supposed to be a secret since I didn't report it to the council. But when Udina saw me, the first thing he said was: I thought you were dead. He would have never known unless he was working with Cerberus."

"That... makes sense." Liara was right. The Major had become capable.

"I still had to bring the councilors somewhere safe, though. So we had to separate. Butterfly searched for the salarian councilor. Grunt kept watch near the landing pad for any Cerberus shuttles. Miranda stayed on the Argo, in case anything went wrong."

Shepard remembered the fight between Butterfly and Kai Leng. Her daughter stopped the assassin from killing the councilor. "It was a risk, sending her off alone like that. What if Kai Leng had gotten her?"

Something was wrong. Kaidan and Miranda exchanged a stare.

"I'm afraid it's bad news. After the medic brought Thane and the salarian councilor to the hospital, the C-Sec guards checked the place. But they... didn't find Kai Leng's body." She sighed heavily. "That bastard is probably still alive."

"But I saw him... Butterfly cut him almost in half. How did he survive?"

"He has cybernetic implant that lets him survive most damage. It was the same model I used on you." Miranda didn't sound proud of it, however. "Butterfly told me what she had done. She didn't destroy his brain or his spine, leaving him capable of healing. Cerberus can still rebuild him."

"Like project Lazarus?"

"Not exactly. The brain is a delicate part. I spent a year rebuilding yours. Like I said, his brain isn't dead. That saves a lot of time. If they replace his damaged body with synthetic parts, that bastard might come back within a month or so."

"Would that make him part cyborg?"

"Probably with the Reaper's tech. I'm not sure." This would make searching for Oriana harder.

This was just like in the comics. The villain was defeated but kept coming back. Shepard felt tired. "Persis' shuttle was shot down. They didn't find her body either?"

"Not exactly. The bodies they found on the crash site were... burned. And so, Bailey called Grunt to his office for details. However, Butterfly is sure Persis is still alive. She just knows it."

Shepard held her head. "I think I need that sleep."

"Then sleep. I'll take Butterfly to the hospital. Can you stay with Shepard in the meantime, Miranda?" Kaidan requested.

"I can stay for a few hours." She still had another topic to discuss with the Commander without the Major's presence. He might disagree with her request.

The door opened. Excited, Butterfly jumped into the room. "Thane sent a message. He is alright and the doc's allowing visitors. Can we go see him, daddy?"

Kaidan thought for a few minutes. "Okay, but not in that attire."

Bewildered, the girl looked at herself, obviously not understanding why her dad didn't approve her clothing.

She was wearing a big sweater and shorts above her knees that were too short in her father's opinion. It almost looked like she wasn't wearing anything but the sweater. Surely, Jack thought that was adorable but Kaidan wouldn't allow any man drooling over his daughter's long legs.

If she were eighteen, he probably wouldn't have minded. But technically she was still two years old. It was too soon for her to dress like a grown-up.

"Whoa there, big daddy." Jack chose this attire for her little niece. "She looks good in this attire. Besides it isn't indecent. Don't be so overprotective."

_Comparing to your clothes, she's dressed like a nun._ Kaidan rolled his eyes. He was too much of a gentleman to say that out loud. "I don't want to fight, Jack. You said it yourself Butterfly is too naive. One way to protect her is not making her look like a... clueless teenager."

_Smooth, Major,_ Shepard coughed.

"I can't see why you're worried. You and Grunt will come with us." Jack still wasn't convinced. "Who would dare mess with a kickass chick, biotic daddy, and a krogan big brother?"

Shepard didn't seem surprised. Butterfly loved to have family members. Grunt would never able to resist Butterfly if she called him big brother.

"Will he come with us? I thought Commander Bailey was talking with him." The Major didn't sound sure.

"His meeting ended a few minutes ago. I sent him message and he agreed to take us to the hospital. His car will be here shortly." Butterfly informed him.

_Yeah, she takes after her mom,_ Kaidan sighed. "Just... change your shorts, Princess. And we'll be off soon."

The tattooed chick turned to Shepard with a funny face. "Say something, Shepard. Your mate is overprotective. Is he a caveman or something?"

Shepard bit her lip to prevent smiling but that didn't help. She ended up smirking. "Yes, I'm afraid he is. And before you ask, I still have no idea why I chose him over Liara."

Butterfly pouted in disapproval, "Mom."

Two sets of puppy eyes were staring at her. Shepard knew she had fallen in love with them and would never regret it.

"Do as your daddy says, B. He will never stop complaining until you change. Believe me, it can be very annoying." Despite what she said, she couldn't stop smiling.

"Hey," Kaidan protested with the voice that could melt her panties.

His voice always turned her on. Perhaps she ought to drag him to her cabin and have her wicked way with him, ASAP.

Jack and Miranda coughed in harmony. Shepard felt her cheeks turn red.

_Damn. Was it that obvious?_

The argument ended when Butterfly followed her parents' order. She was still too young to understand the concept of being a woman.

Shepard saw her daughter, boyfriend, Jack, and Grunt leave in a sky car. When they were gone, her smile faded. She became Commander Shepard again as she spoke with the ex-Cerberus agent.

"What do you want to ask me, Miranda?"

* * *

As always, I couldn't go this far without help from my beta. The Lonely Traveler :D

To M. N. Arias: truth be told, Shepard is tough. But people could be soft inside. I knows some big guy who don't fear gun or bomb but scream like a little girl when he saw a tiny needle. Shepard had too much stress, it wasn't strange if her consciousness couldn't take it and then shut down. Well, I think Shepard in game was a bit inhuman and unreal sometimes.

To Trishata96: glad you like it. Honestly, I never wanted to kill him, but I couldn't help myself. XD for James... Hehe, he would have hard times.


	29. His Shoulders

I shamelessly admit that I got the idea of the first part of this chapter from the song "Just a Fool" by Christina Aguilera.

* * *

"Your kids require you most of all to love them for who they are, not to spend your whole time trying to correct them."

_- Bill Ayers_

* * *

**His Shoulders**

* * *

Another shot of whiskey.

The eighth or ninth? He didn't care. Kaidan kept calling for another shot and another. He would drink till he couldn't remember how bad it hurt now that Shepard was gone.

The nights were so long and cold without her. The first month after the Normandy went down, whiskey was his company at nights. The surviving crew tried to talk to him, but they eventually gave up.

Everyone told him to move on but... He was a fool, wasn't he? Waiting and waiting for someone who would never come back.

Death took her from him forever.

He called for another shot. But someone grabbed it before he could drink it. Kaidan looked up and saw it was his father.

Even in his early sixties, Ken Alenko was still a tough man. His presence made the lieutenant feel like a two-year old boy again. When the man sat down on the stool beside him, Kaidan didn't know what to say.

"You look like shit, you know?" Ken started. He was like Wrex, straight-forward. "When was the last time you slept or ate, I mean, real food?"

"Don't remember." He really didn't give a damn.

Sighing, Ken waved the bartender off. "Your mom wants to see you. She's worried."

"I'm not a boy anymore, dad. I can take care of myself."

The old man tilted his brow. The Alenkos seemed to share that trait along with the whiskey-brown eyes. "From what I'm seeing, it doesn't look like you can take care of yourself."

There was no use in arguing. His stubble was evidence of his neglect. Kaidan just stared at his empty glass, not saying a word.

They sat in silence for a while. In the end, Ken gave up and spoke first. "Come home, Kai."

"I'm not a kid, dad. I..."

"You know what your mom will say." The older Alenko cut him off. "No matter how old you are, you will always be her little Kai. In any parents' eyes, you will never grow up. One day, when you are a father, you will understand."

That day arrived sooner than Kaidan imagined.

...

_Keep your cool, Kai._ The Major told himself as he tried not to shoot another murderous glare to a young soldier who was leering at clueless Butterfly.

They were at Huerta Memorial Hospital, waiting for the doctor. After the mess Cerberus created a lot of people had died or were injured. The hospital's staff was very busy. Although he was a Spectre, he still had to wait.

On the bench, Jack and Butterfly were playing a game to kill the time. Kaidan looked at his daughter and couldn't stop smiling. People saw her as a beautiful woman, but he still saw her as a baby who once sat on his lap.

His father was right.

He heard a growl from behind. He knew that was Grunt. The krogan kept snarling at anyone who looked at his baby sister the wrong way.

It was strange, though. The tattooed woman was barely clothed, but everyone seemed to stare at Butterfly.

"Major Alenko?" Someone called him.

The Major looked up at see a drell. He used to spend time with Thane, and knew he was the ex-assassin's son. If he remembered it right, the young drell's name was Kolyat.

"Kolyat, good to see you." Standing up from his seat, Kaidan shook the drell's hand.

"Good to see you as well. I- the doctor called me. He said my father was hurt..." As solemn as he was the young man stole a glance to the girl who was listening to their conversation.

Butterfly was watching him.

Kaidan coughed, making Kolyat jump. "Your father is fine. He took a beating but nothing the doctor couldn't fix. We paid him a visit but the doc needs him to rest."

Dr. Michel walked towards them. "Major, sorry to keep you waiting. I received your daughter's results. Let's talk in my office."

"I- I better go. Farewell, Major," Kolyat said as he stole another quick glance at Butterfly.

Butterfly didn't quite understand the situation. She looked at her newest aunt for an explanation but Jack just shrugged.

* * *

Hand in hand, the father and daughter walked through the Presidium . Neither of them said anything. They were deep in their thoughts.

Butterfly snuggled against her dad. However, the Major saw she was distracted by an ice-cream cart.

Chuckling, Kaidan led her to the cart. "What's your favorite flavor, Princess?"

"I-I don't know." Butterfly shook her head. Her eyes sad. "I've never tasted ice cream."

The Major knew Butterfly had a difficult childhood, but there were a lot of things he still didn't know about her.

"You've never had a chance?"

Another shake, "Mary only had enough credits for necessary items. I knew she would buy me some if I asked. But I didn't want to bother her." Butterfly rarely made a demand because she didn't want to be anyone's burden.

Kaidan smiled softly and patted her head. "Butter pecan, then. It's the Alenko family favorite. Your grandma always kept a bucket of butter pecan ice cream in the freezer. Your mom loves pistachio flavor. Although, more chocolate toppings makes any flavor taste better."

He ordered four cones of butter pecan ice cream, topped with nuts and chocolate; two for him and Butterfly, and another two for Jack and Grunt.

Jack had a poker face, trying not to look grateful. Although the biotic woman was happy to taste ice-cream for the first time in a decade, she didn't want to let Alenko see her soft side.

As she savored the smooth flavor, she watched Grunt wolf the whole cone down in one bite. Butterfly laughed when it caused Grunt a brain freeze.

Cerberus changed the girl's physical appearance, but her mentality was left untouched.

"Major," She called Kaidan. "Kahlee sent me message. I need to go back to my students."

They worked together for a short time, but Kaidan had began to like her. She wasn't so bad, despite her attitude. "Take care, then."

"I'll stay till you guys board the Normandy. Cerberus probably wouldn't dare screw with Shenko since both of you are in your best condition, but I won't risk it."

"Shenko?"

"Well, it was Joker's idea." Suddenly, Jack didn't know what to do with her hands. "He mixed your names together. I think it's cute... I mean, convenient."

"Should I know what kind of conversation you two had?" He had a pretty good idea, though.

"I am fond of that f... flight lieutenant, and prefer to see him in one piece. So no, you shouldn't."

Chuckling, Kaidan let it slide. "Good working with you. But well, I'm not sure about boarding the Normandy."

"Why? Shepard would like having you and Butterfly with her." She and Grunt had waited outside Dr. Michel's office as Kaidan and his daughter spoke with the woman. She didn't know had happened in that room.

That question wasn't easy to answer. Kaidan sighed as he bent over the Presidium's terrace. "That amp in her head is the problem. Doc said she and her team might be able to remove it, but she has to run some more tests. Meaning Butterfly would have to stay in the hospital at least for a month."

"But Shepard still has to save the galaxy. She can't stay." Jack felt bad for them. Time was running out, but they still couldn't be together.

"Despite her ability, leaving Butterfly here is a risk. Cerberus might try to abduct her again and... You know. Anything could happen to her if she is far from our sight. We can't bear the thought of losing her again," he said with a sigh.

_Damn it._ Jack frowned. _This guy makes me want to hug him. Those eyes are too dangerous._

Steadying herself, Jack changed the subject. "I hate to say it. But that 'evil eye' is dangerous. She won't be safe till it's out of her."

Kaidan nodded solemnly. "That's why I have to talk with Amala before making any decision."

_They aren't married, but they sure act like they are. Perhaps Butterfly still has a chance to have a real family after this mess._

"Kai, is that you?" Someone said to the Major.

There were only a few people who called him that name. Kaidan turned around, half expecting to see an old friend.

It was someone he thought he would ever actually see again.

"Rahna?"

The brunette in front of him was his first crush. It was almost two decades since they last saw each other . She still beautiful but she didn't make Kaidan's heart beat fast anymore.

No one compared to Amala.

Ignoring Jack, Rahna kept staring at the Major. She had to admit that he looked a lot better than during the BaAT years. "I saw the vid. You're Spectre and saved the councilors. Wow, that's great!"

Before he could answer, Butterfly went to his side and gripped his arm tightly. She didn't pout but the look on her face was priceless.

Jack had to cover her mouth with her hand. Butterfly was possessive like her dad, it seemed.

"Oh, your sister?" Rahna seemed upset.

"Daughter," the girl huffed.

That was unexpected. Kaidan didn't look old enough to have a daughter this age. The brunette gasped, lost for words.

_Butterfly was really Amala's girl._The Major smiled dryly at the thought. She was a good girl but able to turn it off in a second.

Like mother, like daughter.

"Let's me introduce you. Rahna, this is Butterfly, my daughter. And Butterfly, this is Rahna, an old friend."

"Butterfly? A beautiful name but... The girl who had been abducted from the hospital months ago was also named Butterfly. Butterfly Shepard, if I remember correctly."

It was an easy name to remember. And the reporters kept talking about the girl for weeks. Everyone wanted to know about Commander Shepard's love life.

And now, Rahna wanted the identity of Butterfly's mother.

"It's... complicated." It wasn't a lie. Kaidan just didn't feel like he should have to explain it to her.

Butterfly knew the brunette made him nervous. "Shall we go home, daddy? Mommy is waiting for us. Besides, Big-G has to leave soon. He wants to take us home before taking his ship back to Tuchanka."

_Big-G? When did she come up Grunt's nickname? _Kaidan wondered if the krogan didn't like the nickname, but he would be unable to deny his little sister anything. He had fallen for Butterfly head-over-heels since he saw her smash a Cerberus turret with her biotics.

"Yeah, well. Sorry Rahna, but we have to go. See you later." He said politely although Butterfly was dragging him from there.

He laughed when they were far from Rahna's sight. His daughter seemed to understand why. She pouted and snuggled against him.

A family passes them. Butterfly eyed the kid who was riding his father's back and then looked away.

"Butterfly?" Kaidan asked.

But she shook her head. "Nothing,"

_She takes that trait after her mom,_ Kaidan sighed. They always tried to be strong. "I'm your daddy, Butterfly. No matter what happens, you can rely on me."

As she stared at him, she looked like she was about to cry. "I just... I always wondered how it would feel to... ride your back like that. But I never... Now, I'm with you but... I'm too big."

Smiling, the biotic daddy patted his daughter's head lovingly before turning around and sitting down in front of her.

"I'm not as strong as Grunt, but I'm sure you're not that heavy. Come on, Princess. Let's take a ride."

She tried not to cry as she circled her arms around Kaidan's neck. But he felt hot tears fall on his shoulder.

Grunt and Jack stared at them. The biotic woman couldn't hide her smile as she saw Butterfly had fallen asleep on her dad's back.

Her cheeks were wet with tears, but her lips arched up in a blissful smile.

* * *

5th December of every year is Thailand's king's birthday and also father day. I know it's quite late but it still December, so I still in the mood of father things and all. My own dad died a decade ago so I hope good luck for other's father. ;) Butterfly's father included.

Thank for beta and wish you joy in holy December too, The Lovely Traveler.


	30. Certain is Uncertain

"What we are today comes from our thoughts of yesterday, and our present thoughts build our life of tomorrow: Our life is the creation of our mind."

_- Buddha_

* * *

**Certain is Uncertain**

* * *

For once, she hoped her life would work out.

One morning, Shepard toddled out of her cabin. Her head hurt and her stomach was empty. The Normandy SR1 had been patrolling in the Terminus system for a month. They had found nothing and the Commander was dying with boredom. This strange illness only made everything worse.

She felt someone's eyes on her back and knew who it was. Kaidan was always stationed at that damn terminal. Despite what she had done, he kept watching her back, still supporting her.

But she just... couldn't repay in kind.

Wordlessly, Shepard poured herself coffee, still avoiding looking his way. It had been almost two months since she had ran from the restaurant. She still hadn't said a word to Kaidan unless it was during missions. Both of them behaved professionally, and she hated it.

If she was honest with herself, Shepard admitted she longed for his touch. She wanted him to hold her. But every morning, she woke up in an empty bed with a feeling of emptiness. Day after day, things just got worse.

Why? Why couldn't she just tell him how sorry she was? Kaidan always understood. He would forgive her and they might be able to rekindle their relationship.

Damn her dignity.

"Commander," A low, rich baritone voice called. The tone was intimate but the wording formal. Without touching, Kaidan managed to hurt her heart, still.

Still, she just stood there, not answering.

_Hold me, kiss me, and I'll surrender._ Shepard prayed with her heart.

But Kaidan was the shy lieutenant that day. Although he wanted to pull her close and screw her brains out, he simply couldn't do it since he still didn't know where they stood.

Instead of following his heart, he asked. "Are you alright? You don't look so good."

"I'm fine." Damn, why it was so hard to talk to him like a normal friend? "I just... lack sleep, that's all."

It wasn't exactly a lie. Besides the nightmares, the nausea in her belly kept her awake at night for a week now.

Kaidan raised his hand, almost touching her shoulder in concern, but paused as some random crew walked passed them. "Perhaps you should talk with Dr. Chakwas."

"I- thank. I'll talk to her. In fact, I think I should go now." Again, she ran.

Shepard didn't look back until the med bay's door closed behind her. Through the glass window, she saw Kaidan returning to his terminal. His shoulders dropped in defeat. He looked like a hurt puppy and felt bad for causing him pain.

Chakwas wasn't in the med bay. It was still early so the doctor might still be sleeping in her bunk. The Commander didn't want to disturb the good old woman, so she looked around for some painkillers but found something she didn't expect.

It was a small package with the words: pregnancy test.

* * *

Kaidan gently placed his daughter on the bed before tucking the blanket over her. Butterfly was sleeping soundly, and didn't stir when her dad kissed her forehead.

Looking up, he saw a soft smile on Shepard. She was standing in the doorway, holding a cup of coffee.

Shepard's apartment wasn't vast. The living room and bedroom were the same room. Besides the bathroom, the kitchen was the only room that separated the others. Smiling, Kaidan gently pushed the mother of his child into the smaller room, shutting the door behind him.

And before they knew it, they found themselves in each other's arms. Hungrily, they kissed as he set her down on the counter. Her legs tangled around his hips. His shirt gone before he realized it.

_I need you._

They parted only to catch their breath. Shepard took the chance to look at his wound. It was healing but she could see a faint line of the cut on his chest.

He almost died. The thought scared Shepard. She kissed the cut as an apology.

"Hey, it's alright," Understanding, Kaidan cupped her cheeks softly. "I'm here now. We're together."

"I missed you," She whispered. Someday she'd tell him about the unfinished painting and that quote, but not today. Now, she wanted to be with him. Three years had been too long.

"I missed you too. There... There was no one but you," Kaidan purred, sending a jolt of desire through her spine.

But that wasn't enough to convince Shepard. "Seriously? I mean... For me, it's only been a few months. It has been three years for you, Kaidan. How could you...? I have never known a man that could be... celibate that long."

Sighing, the Major whispered her how he'd 'handled' himself those years. Shepard covered her mouth with her hand as each detail made her blush.

"I take it you haven't had anyone as well," He nipped her earlobe, making her moan.

She wanted to yell. 'Yes and yes'. But Commander Shepard would never act like a schoolgirl. Instead, she put on her poker face. "Don't be so sure, Major. You're not the only attractive guy in the galaxy."

Without warning, he squeezed her bottom, making her squeak in surprise. "I know you aren't that kind of woman. Before that night, you were a 30 year-old virgin, remember?"

Still blushing, Shepard punched his shoulder. "Don't mention that!"

"You have no reason to be ashamed. You're the most beautiful woman I have ever known. I'm so lucky Butterfly got her beauty from her mother."

She hit him again, but smiled broader. "You're really taken by her, aren't you?"

"What can I say? You are both my girls, my world... my everything. I can't live without you." Kaidan kissed her hand, and Shepard melted.

Talking about Butterfly brought their concern up. "About the amp..."

He told her everything Dr. Michel said. But they still hadn't decided anything. It wasn't easy.

"Yes," Kaidan replied.

"I contacted Mordin's ex-protege. Maelon suggested we could just wait to see if that amp has any effect on Butterfly. He was sure your DNA would do the trick."

"Are you sure about this Maelon? I know Mordin was your friend, but this guy..."

She understood his concern. That suggestion sounded too reckless. "He is a bright scientist but lacks morals. He might have cured the genophage if he hadn't used such a barbaric method."

"I'm not going to lie. I'm not sure about this Maelon, but I trust you. If you believe him, so do I."

That comment was awarded with a long, deep kiss. "He owes me his life. I'm sure he wouldn't dare lie to me. But of course, WE still have to keep our eyes on her."

We? Kaidan didn't want to sound so hopeful but... "Are you saying we can be... together again?"

"I can't imagine myself taking down the Reapers or raising Butterfly without you, Kaidan," She combed his pepper and salt hair gently. After all these years, he had more grey but that just made him more attractive. "So after the many times we almost died or lost each other... What if there is no other chance? We have wasted enough time, don't you think?"

He answered with a kiss. Yes, they had wasted enough time.

* * *

Hand on her mouth; Shepard fought the urge to scream as she stared at the small object in her hand for the tenth time.

Positive.

The pregnancy test fell to the bathroom floor. Shepard collapsed on the floor, hand on her belly and cried.

_What should I do?_ She repeated that question in her head over and over again. Her imagination played an image of her in a dirty apron, trying to feed a little boy a meal. But the ungrateful brat kept screaming and throwing his food before vomiting on her.

She crawled toward the toilet, emptying her stomach.

Commander Shepard still had a galaxy to save. She couldn't settle down, not while the Reapers were still threatening the organic creatures and every civilization.

_Kaidan!_ Her thought ran quickly to him. He was the one who was responsible for this... this disaster. He had to do something.

_You can't just tell him that,_ her consciousness argued. _You broke his heart. What will he think if you told him that you're with his child? What if he doesn't want you anymore?_

For the first time in her life, Shepard cried like a little girl.

* * *

I'm afraid this will be last chapter for this year. I'd planned to spend my holiday with my mom. Sadly, her house don't have internet. I wouldn't be able to post anything for awhile. Whatsoever, happy holiday everyone.

Good wish to my beta, The Lonely Traveler. :)


	31. Deception

Truth be told, I didn't intend to write this chapter. But I think it would be rude if I just skipped Grunt's side of the story. Besides, I owe you readers some explanation. So here it is.

* * *

"There is nothing more deceptive than an obvious fact."

_- Arthur Conan Doyle, The Boscombe Valley Mystery_

* * *

**Deception**

* * *

He was a warrior, a soldier. The warlord Okeer bred him as the perfect krogan. He was supposed to be the strongest and fastest in battlefield. Killing was an important part of his life, a part he enjoyed.

Fighting and killing were the only things he knew. Grunt still had a lot to learn. He knew how to control his curiosity, and so didn't know how he ended up in the same room with a group of crazy Cerberus troops.

Where was his squad anyway?

The last thing he remembered Alenko had led them farther into Lamia station. When they reached the T-junction near the center, he smelled something fishy. Curious, he went to investigate. And when he went back to the humans, they were gone and instead were a group of Cerberus troops.

He was kind of glad his battlemaster wasn't here. She'd be disappointed by his behavior.

It wasn't like he would just lie down and let Cerberus have their fun. He was a Krogan. He kicked the Rachni's butt and killed thresher maws before breakfast. These stupid little mammals would never take him down easily.

Cerberus wasn't completely stupid. After Grunt shot the fifth Cerberus centurion down, they sent three dragoons, two heavy turrets, and assault troopers to terminate him.

He was flattered.

From behind cover, Grunt was thinking about how to get rid of those biotic soldiers with one grenade when something that looked like a giant plasma ball flashed through the main hallway. There was a loud boom, and one of the turrets was blown apart. The explosion kicked the engineer and other soldiers nearby away.

Another turret and it changed its target. But it took too long to turn its gun. With a speed that could be described as nothing but inhuman, a glowing fist smashed the machine.

Words couldn't describe the mess. In the middle of the war zone, one female human was standing. She was wearing Cerberus armor but she attacked his enemies.

Three dragoons moved towards her, lashes in their hands. But the woman didn't even flinch. She formed a dark biotic field and then like scrap metal they slowly floated around her like a metallic vortex.

Grunt gasped. He had seen powerful biotics like Samara and Jack fight many times, but he had never seen anything like this. The mysterious woman didn't lift a big object but lifted many tiny objects and used them as shielding.

Very clever.

But it wasn't just that when she moved the vortex moved with her. The scraps in the vortex weren't useful when the opponents wore armor but the tiny sharp objects in the whirlwind could be deadlier than the blade. When a dragoon tried to use his lash, the shield was blown up. Scrap metal hurled towards them like a metallic tempest.

In the end, two of the dragoons became pincushions. They died before their bodies touched the ground. The last one was out of the tempest's way and was left unscratched.

Not for long, though.

The human flinched as if stabbed in the back. Dark energy engulfed him like a blanket and then he fell lifelessly.

As the big guy fell, Grunt saw the woman standing though she looked exhausted. She held her head in her hands and swayed back and forth.

Some assault troopers were still alive. They tried to raise their guns but Miranda appeared and shot them.

"Butterfly, are you alright?" the ex-Cerberus agent asked the shorter woman.

_Butterfly? Shepard's daughter was named Butterfly too, wasn't she?_ Grunt could no longer contain his curiously. He rushed from behind cover to speak to them.

"Lawson, what are you doing here?"

Miranda didn't look surprised to see him. But the other woman cut him off. "No time. Daddy is in danger."

Grunt looked at Miranda. But she just shrugged. "Do as she says, Grunt. I'll explain later."

They followed Butterfly. The krogan remembered it was the same way they were going before his tangle with the Cerberus troops. The giant door was locked and the shorter woman hacked it open.

It didn't take long. The door opened and revealed the mess inside. Grunt heard Butterfly growl like a beast at another woman who was towering over the blood-covered Major. She charged the woman before the final blow was made.

They carried blades, but neither of them had chance to use them as they fought hand-to-hand. Their movements were too fast for organic eyes to capture. However, he thought Butterfly was a bit slower. It was probably because she had used too much power already.

Grunt almost jumped to the fray when he saw the masked woman kick Butterfly in the face, but Miranda stopped him.

"Shoot that window, Grunt." The ex-Cerberus agent pointed at the woman on the upper floor. "Use the rocket launcher."

There was no need to say it twice. The krogan lifted his rocket launcher and aimed neatly at his target.

"Shit!" the redhead exclaimed.

The window shattered into a million pieces. The red haired woman hid behind cover and unfortunately didn't suffer major damage. Grunt saw she hit something on the terminal.

"Persis, retreat!"

The masked woman kicked Butterfly off her before throwing a smoke bomb. When Butterfly jumped backward to avoid the smoke, Persis jumped to the upper room.

They fled through the back door. Butterfly started to go after them, but the station VI stopped her with an announcement. "Self-destruct mode activated. Self-destruct in five minutes."

"Shit! Arachne activated the self-destruct mode. We have to stop it." Miranda shouted. She checked Kaidan's pulse but it was faint. "He's still alive barely. But I don't think we will be able to carry him to the shuttle in five minute."

"Just try and keep him alive. I'll hack the system," Butterfly said and jumped up.

While Miranda tried to save the Major and Butterfly hacked the terminal, Grunt found Jack. The biotic woman was unconscious but still alive. She had a dark bruise on her back.

Someone hit her in the back with a blunt object.

"Self-destruct deactivated," the VI informed.

Butterfly opened a hidden door that led to the upper floor. "Aunty, if you can spare a minute, I have something you ought to see."

Miranda hesitated. But she knew Butterfly wouldn't ask if it was not important. She stabilized the Major before going upstairs.

As soon as Miranda stepped in the control room, she turned the big screen on.

"It seems Arachne was going to call her boss when we interrupted her," She pointed at the name in the contact list.

This could be a big opportunity. "Can you track him using the address?"

"I'm afraid not," Butterfly shook her head, "The VI said the channel would be erased after the call was sent. And I think he would send more men here if no one reports to him in... fifty minutes."

That was not enough time for her to savage Cerberus flies. Miranda wanted everything in Arachne's terminal. "Can we send him a false message to buy us time?"

The girl thought for a minute. Eventually, she smirked. "I can do better."

Butterfly's slender fingers danced on the terminal interface like a grand pianist. Ten minutes later, she pressed the play button.

"Good news, sir," Arachne's voice rang. Butterfly faked the log by combining the voice from other logs together. "Persis passed the test. Major Alenko is dead."

Miranda laughed. Shepard's daughter was as mischievous as her mom but also skilled in tech as her dad. "That will do, I believe. But what if the real bitch called him first?"

"We have to take the chance," The girl smiled dangerously, "But I think we'll be fine. Arachne and Persis probably fled in the shuttle. They won't have long-range communication until they hit the nearest planet or ship. And that won't be for a while."

Lamia station was hidden in krogan space, right under Wrex's nose. The nearest habitable planet was Tuchanka, and obviously not fans of Cerberus. Arachne would have a long trip to a safe place.

But how could Butterfly know that? She was kept as a prisoner, after all. Had someone told her the coordinates of the station?

When Miranda asked, the young woman just shrugged and said, "Lucky guess."

And then, she sent the fake voice message.

* * *

I can't believe I misplaced the chapter, again! Stupid, stupid Mitimai. I'm so sorry ToT Thank The Lonely Traveler for Beta and patiently bear with my stupidity.


	32. Welcome Home

"There is no place like home."

_- L. Frank Baum, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz_

* * *

**Welcome Home**

* * *

Jack wasn't familiar with saying goodbye. Heck, she never did it. Usually, she just took her leave without warning, people left after they were done with her, or simply died on her.

No one had ever given her a goodbye hug until Butterfly.

"See you later, Aunty Jack," the girl smiled. Unlike other kids, she would never ask Jack to stay. She knew the tattooed woman had her duty.

Would there be a 'later' for them? Jack wasn't sure. "Later, little girl. Take care of yourself and your parents, ok? They won't survive the war without you."

"Hey," Shepard protested.

Jack then dragged the Commander away from Butterfly. "I want to tell you something."

The biotic woman wasn't part of her official crew anymore, but Shepard still listened. "What do you need?"

Jack looked at Butterfly to make sure they were out of her hearing range. "I don't know what Cerberus has done to Butterfly…But if she passed through the same hell I did, she will need your help."

Although she never said it, Shepard knew her daughter needed special care. Who really knew how damaged Butterfly really was? "I will always by her side, no matter what happens."

They shared a knowing smile.

"Take care, Shepard," Jack patted Shepard's shoulder before leaving.

The Commander walked back to her daughter. In front of the airlock to the Normandy, Kaidan and Butterfly were waiting.

"Can we go now?" The Major asked, smiling.

Shepard looked at her family and couldn't stop smiling. "Of course, Major. Let's go home."

Butterfly already held Kaidan's hand. When her mom was close enough, she held Shepard's hand. It was a childish gesture.

A happy child's gesture.

With a blissful smile, the Commander led them through the airlock.

Shepard didn't know what to expect coming back to the Normandy. Well, since Garrus and James were already in the ship, they had probably informed the rest of the crew about Butterfly. But what would they think? She didn't care much about gossip, but Butterfly wanted to become part of the family again.

Judging from last time, Butterfly didn't take rejection well. If the crew didn't welcome her back, she might have difficulty controlling her biotics. And with that amp, she was able to do a lot of damage.

After all, Butterfly was only a baby. And a baby was hardly able to control their emotions, let alone biotics.

The airlock opened. Shepard took a long exhale before she led the girl and the biotic daddy on board the Normandy. They walked in tow. The Commander on one end, the Major on the other end with Butterfly in the middle.

Something was wrong. There was no one in the bridge or CIC.

"EDI, where is everyone?" Shepard asked the AI, although EDI's hardware wasn't in sight,

After a long silence the AI finally answered. "In the crew deck, Shepard. The crew has a serious situation to discuss."

Curious, the family went to the crew desk. The elevator hadn't fully opened when they heard the shout.

"Surprise!"

Everyone, even the space hamster, was there. The crew had set up a party for Butterfly. Shepard smiled wide at the banner. 'Welcome home'. Someone had written it with terrible handwriting but it was still a beautiful sight.

One by one, aunts and uncles took a turn to give Butterfly a hug and kiss. The girl couldn't stop smiling although tears threatened to fall.

"What're you doing? Let's get some drinks," Chakwas called Shepard and Kaidan who were still standing by the elevator. Judging from her pink cheeks, it seemed the good doctor had already started enjoying herself.

"Come on, Lola," James circled his arm around Shepard's neck, dragging her toward the party. "Engineer Adams opened his brandy for this party. Traynor and Cortez and... Everyone brought food, real food."

Kaidan fought the urge to punch the younger man. He looked around and smiled as Garrus tried to lift Butterfly up like he used to when she was smaller. Although she was slender, it still wasn't an easy task.

"You're a lucky bastard, you know?" A familiar voice interrupted his thoughts.

The Major tilted his eyebrow. "Joker?"

The pilot no longer need a crutch, and could walk quieter.

"You have a beautiful girlfriend and daughter. And they love you despite your shit. I admit I'm a bit... envious of you," Joker said nervously. His eyes were on EDI.

Kaidan followed his glance and almost jumped. It was the Cerberus robot that almost killed him.

"Easy guy," Amused, Joker smirked. "That's EDI. She took over that hardware from Cerberus. Don't worry. She is harmless... I mean, for us. But don't change the subject."

"I wasn't," Kaidan sighed. "I was an idiot. But I intend to make it better somehow."

"Good. You should know that if you break their hearts again, the whole ship will turn against you," Crossing his arms, Joker threatened.

"I'll keep that in mind. But... I expected the crew would be more... Well, you know. Butterfly has changed. This isn't normal."

"And since when have things been normal around here?" Joker pointed around. "Our CO came back from the dead. My co-pilot is an unshackled AI. Garrus caught a missile with his face. And I am the most incredible human helmsman in the galaxy who took my sweetheart through the Omega 4 relay and came back. Judging from all of this, a girl struck in a grown-up body isn't a big deal."

But Kaidan knew him better. "Stop playing coy, Joker. Tell me the truth."

Joker rolled his eyes but finally gave in. "Alright, I'll tell you. It was awkward at first but... Chakwas gave us something to think about. After all, Butterfly never chose to be like this. I'll be damned if I turned away from her because Cerberus transformed her body."

_I should buy Chakwas something nice,_Kaidan took note.

"Besides, I owe her. Because of me, they were spaced... Shepard said she didn't blame me. But I still... Where is my glass?" Joker walked away before he said anything stupid.

But that reminded Kaidan of the day he had almost killed the pilot. It was the day he saw Joker in that escape pod... without Shepard.

The Major shook his head._It's the past_. Otherwise, he'd be an idiot for not savoring the sweetness of the present while it lasted.

He smiled at his girlfriend and daughter. They were the most beautiful girls in his universe. Joker was right. He was a lucky bastard.

He noticed the young lieutenant trying not to ogle Butterfly directly. And since he once was a shy young man himself, Kaidan thought he knew what was going on in James head.

This wasn't good.

A few years ago, his mother taught his cousin. 'Sometimes, men take a woman's ignorance as an invitation. Don't trust them wholeheartedly, dear. And if you feel uncomfortable with any man, don't hesitate to tell me or your cousin.'

As a father, he would keep his eyes on James,_closely._

* * *

Shepard couldn't remember the last time she had sat back and relaxed. Although there was a lot of work waiting, she could take some time to enjoy the moment with her family.

A glass of tequila in hand, she watched Joker and Butterfly play Blasto: the game. The girl beat him as usual but it didn't stop him from trying to win.

Garrus sat down nearby, holding a cocktail glass. He had even placed a small umbrella in the glass.

"Doesn't it bother you?" Garrus gestured at Butterfly.

After everything they had gone together, Shepard knew she couldn't lie or hide anything from her best friend. She answered honestly. "If I said no, it would be a lie. Of course, it bothers me. But I really can do nothing to turn her back. Besides, this is way better than losing her."

"And I admit I hesitated when I realized it was her," Sighing, the turian looked miserable. "But when I watched her closely, I knew that was still her. Cerberus hadn't changed who she is."

"Exactly. She's still Butterfly," Shepard agreed.

"You said it bothers you, but have you told her your feelings?"

"I fear if I spoke my mind, I might break her heart again." Being a mother wasn't an easy task. "Butterfly is more fragile than I thought. And Jack warned me..."

_If she passed though the same hell I did, she will need your help._

Shepard didn't tell him about her discussion with the biotic woman, but Garrus seemed to understand. He just nodded.

"Then I won't say anything. Butterfly is my niece. Anyone who says otherwise will have a problem with me."

"Thanks. But I just... What would Wrex say if he saw her like this?"

Garrus paused as he tried to imagine. Eventually, he just shrugged. "I don't even know if he knows how fast humans grow. He might not even know her aging isn't natural. Then again, he's not a fool. He just wouldn't give a damn."

"Probably," The Commander knew the battlemaster. His point of view was simple. But most of the time, he made wise decisions.

"I heard he owes you a party. Should we stop by Tuchanka?"

She had forgotten about it completely. But the talk about Tuchanka reminded her of another mission. "Shit, I almost forgot the Primarch asked me to search for his men on Tuchanka!"

"How could you forget such an important mission!?" Garrus exclaimed so loud.

Everyone stared at them. Shepard waved them off.

"Perhaps I have to stop this party and get everyone back on duty ASAP. Those men aren't going to rescue themselves." It was possible they might already be dead, but she wouldn't leave the mission incomplete.

"I hate to say it, but that's a good idea." Garrus knew their duty. He gulped his drink down. "I will return to my post. Call if you need me."

The Commander told her crew to return to their posts as well. With a disappointing moan, they cleaned the hall and left to their duties.

"We're heading to Tuchanka, Joker." Shepard ordered. "EDI, call me when we approach the planet, but don't let the krogan know we're there."

"We're in a silent mission?" The helmsman asked just to make sure he heard it right. "I thought you might want to tell Wrex about Butterfly. He will be happy to see her."

Listening quietly, Butterfly just tilted her brow. But her eyes were full of excitement. She wanted to see her big uncle again, but wouldn't request anything if it conflicted with Shepard's mission.

"Well, I might pay him a visit after the mission," Shepard knew the girl's thoughts and couldn't ignore it.

"Can I go with you?" Butterfly asked.

"Of course, B. Your uncle Wrex will be glad to see you. Maybe you ought to meet Urz as well."

"Who is Urz?" Kaidan interrupted. He tried not to sound like a jealous boyfriend but he couldn't help but notice the loving tone in Shepard's voice as she talked about this Urz.

"He is my Varren. Krogan treat these animals like humans treat dogs. I got him when I helped Grunt with his ritual but Wrex didn't allow me to keep him on the ship." Then again, if she had kept Urz, the Collectors might have killed him when they invaded the Normandy.

The Major made a funny noise in his throat and looked away. Shepard noticed the resemblance between the father and his child. They made that noise when they were embarrassed.

Joker glared at the couple knowingly. "Time for me to fly the ship, then. But, hey, how about Udina? I haven't heard any news about him."

"Although he is a human, he is also a councilor. So the council will take care of him. I don't know where he is or what happened to him. Honestly, I don't care," Kaidan shrugged.

"Agreed. That bast... I mean, councilor was always trouble." Like everyone, the pilot tried to watch his language when Butterfly was around. "I thought he was gone for good when Shepard chose Anderson to be the human councilor. Who would have thought Anderson would step aside and let Udina take his place?"

"Speaking of which..." Shepard blushed slightly. "I need to contact Anderson. Kaidan, B come with me."

"Whoa!" Joker laughed. "You speak to your daughter like another marine."

That was annoying, but she couldn't deny the truth. "Go back to your post, Helmsman."

"Aye, aye ma'am." The pilot saluted her before turning to Butterfly. "Give me a hug, sweetheart. I'm going to need it."

Butterfly not only hugged him, but also kissed his cheek. Joker looked too smug.

"Oh, fly the ship already!" Shepard rolled her eyes.

"Jealous?" he smiled.

"Permission to hit our pilot, ma'am?" Kaidan played along.

"Oh, stop it, both of you! It feels like having a band of boys. Thank god I have a daughter."

They laughed. Shepard really hoped this meant they were going to be alright.

* * *

There was not much light in the cell.

C-Sec hadn't thrown him in prison, yet. They said it was because the investigation was ongoing and he was a councilor.

This was different from his suite. The bed was too hard and the food was tasteless, at least it had a separate bathroom.

Walking around in circles, he knew the council would offer him a chance to get away, in exchange for Cerberus information. But The Illusive Man wouldn't like it. Not that he had any important information or anything. He knew he was only a pawn in TIM's game.

It was a risky game, but the wager was alluring. If the plan succeeded, he would get power. Otherwise, Cerberus would dispose of him.

When The Illusive Man told him about Major Alenko's death, he thought luck was on his side. With her daughter and boyfriend gone, Commander Shepard would break. No one would be able to stop them.

Needless to say he was shocked when the second human Spectre walked into the council chamber. Unable to think thoughtfully, he blurted out. "I thought you were dead!"

And that was a huge mistake. The Major realized he was working with The Illusive Man instantly.

He had lost the bet. And The Illusive Man had no use for a loser.

Or did he?

Udina saw his door open and then a woman in a grey suit walked in. She didn't say anything, but he thought he knew why she was here.

"At last, The Illusive Man sent someone to get me out of here. What took you so long? No, that doesn't matter. Let's go," The ex-councilor grumbled.

But the woman didn't come for a rescue. With one slash, she cut the man down. Udina died before his body hit the floor.

* * *

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta :D


	33. Distress Call

"Not all of us can do great things. But we can do small things with great love."

_- Mother Teresa_

* * *

**Distress Call**

* * *

It was a cargo ship. No name, no number, no way to identify it, but the Alliance got its distress call, nonetheless.

Staff Commander Clint Shepard led his men on board. As he and Operations Chief Verma were looking for survivors among the dead bodies, Staff Lieutenant Alenko was scanning the floor with his Omni-tool.

"I found a vital signal. Someone is in the cockpit but... the signal is very weak. Most likely he or she is badly injured."

The ship's power was down. They had to find their way through the darkness. Despite their flashlights, Verma stumbled on something. Luckily, Shepard caught her.

"I know I'm charming, but you don't have to jump me like that," He bantered.

The woman rolled her eyes. "Where did you learn to flirt like that? No doubt you're still single."

"Don't hurt the man's pride, Amala," Ken Alenko chuckled. "With a mouth like that, he gets lucky enough."

"Shut up, you," Shepard pouted. "Otherwise, I'll tell your wife about that blond."

"I was just being a gentleman. I didn't do anything dishonest," The other man protested.

Amala slapped her forehead. "Stop, you two. We're on a rescue mission, remember?"

The men finally stopped auguring and continued on their mission. However, the door to the cockpit was locked. Ken hacked it.

There was someone on the pilot's chair. From behind, that person looked like a woman. Amala touched her shoulder but she was cold. Her face was pale like a paper.

"She died in this position, I think." The chief felt the urge to vomit. She had seen a lot of people die, but this woman was different. Her thoughts were cut short when she heard a sob.

"A baby! A baby is still alive."

Gently, Amala lifted the little one from the dead woman's hands.

The chief opened the white sheet and took a peek. "It's a girl."

"The mother most likely died after she sent the distress call," Clint surmised. "Brave girl..."

"A woman is stronger when she has to protect the ones she loves," Amala smiled softly. She looked into her commander's eyes with unspoken emotion.

Neither of them said anything, but both knew their feeling toward one another, regardless of Clint's attitude. The problem was the regs.

"This girl is going to need a family." Clint Shepard said.

"I hope I can..." she evaded his eyes and whispered. "I always wanted to be a mother."

Only the commander heard that. He smiled sheepishly in return.

"Commander!" the helmsman from their ship radioed. "We have company. An unidentified ship is in the sixth. They didn't answer my call but I detect a heavy cannon. You better get the hell out of there, sir."

The three ran from the cockpit. As they headed towards the exit, the unidentified ship began shooting

It wasn't enough to destroy the ship. But the force knocked piles of containers down. Even with the baby in her hands, Amala dodged them. She almost made it out when another cannon shoot shook the whole ship violently. Their ship began to shoot back causing the cargo ship to become caught in the crossfire.

"Amala!" Clint shouted in horror as the ceiling fell down upon the chief and the baby. He tried to run to them but Ken pulled him.

"No, Clint. It's too dangerous!"

But the man didn't listen. He tried to move the rubbish to find his chief. Finally, the lieutenant gave up and helped him.

They found Amala sitting on her knees, bending over the floor. Many sharp shards had stabbed her back. Beneath her, the baby cried softly but unharmed.

Ken tried to find her pulse, but it was weak. "She needs medical attention. We need to get back to the ship, ASAP."

Clint gave the baby to his friend before lifting Amala up. All the time they ran to the airlock, he kept calling her name over and over.

"Don't die on me, Amala. We will get out of here, go back to Earth and have a family. We will adopt this baby and we will..."

Her face was under the helmet. He didn't hear what she was saying, but he knew she was smiling.

They made it back to their ship in time as the cargo ship exploded. The unidentified ship aimed its gun on them but another Alliance ship had arrived.

As soon as the reinforcement was in view, the mystery ship fled. Clint finally had time to look at the chief.

The helmet was taken off, but Amala was no longer breathing. The commander cried for the doctor. He couldn't let her go.

It took hours before he returned to his senses. In the med bay, he sat near Amala's body, still in his armor. The lieutenant came to him later that night.

"Clint..." Ken asked carefully.

The man nodded. "I know, Ken. I just want to... How about the girl?"

"She is sleeping. Doc gave her milk. He said she is healthy. But she was starving for too long."

Sighing, the CO massaged his temples. "I had a bad feeling about it, you know? Both ships were unidentified. They came out of nowhere. One ship kept shooting at the other like they had hated each other for years."

"I think someone tried to destroy the cargo ship and everything inside. But we will never know since the whole ship went down." Ken answered. "Luckily, we saved the girl."

"That reminds me. Our little girl doesn't have a name."

Ken wasn't sure what to say. "Doc calls her Athena. He gave her that name for her strength just like the Greek goddess."

"Amala..."

"What?" The lieutenant wasn't sure if he had heard correctly.

"Amala died to save her life. So she is the girl's mother. From now on, the girl's name is Amala, Amala Shepard."

* * *

Amala Shepard woke up feeling cold. She looked up and found Butterfly had stolen her blanket. The girl had been a bed hog but now that she was bigger, it was worse. Perhaps it was the time for separate bedrooms.

Two hours before reaching Tuchanka, and Shepard didn't want to sleep so she got dressed and went to the starboard observation.

There, she found Kaidan sleeping on the couch. Despite her wish, the Major denied to sleep in the captain's cabin. He didn't care about the regs or people's opinions, but the bed was too small for the three of them.

He was so beautiful and peaceful. She didn't have the heart to wake him, so she just sat down nearby and gazed at the stars.

She didn't know how much time had passed until she heard movement. Kaidan sat behind and covered her with his blanket and embraced her.

"Can't sleep?" he asked sleepily.

As he kissed her neck, Shepard couldn't help but lean back, rest her face in the crook of his neck. Kaidan smelled of eezo and Alliance standard soap. She hated that soap's scent but it smelled good on him.

"I was thinking..."

"About what Mr. Shepard said?" Again, he always knew what she was thinking.

When they contacted Anderson, they also met the man who shared her surname. Clint Shepard told her about how he and his team found her, and how Amala Verma died to save her.

She kept thinking about it. Even dreamed about it. "I grew up in an orphanage, thinking my parents didn't want me. But now... I know my mother died bravely. It just... everything I had ever believed for thirty years was wrong. I still can't wrap my head around it."

Kaidan kissed her again. "Take your time, love. No need to rush."

What did she do to deserve him? "Love you too, Kai."

"Shepard." EDI interrupted them. Shepard thought she imagine it but the AI sounded panicked.

"What happened?"

"Butterfly... She is bleeding! Her hormone levels have greatly increased and she said her stomach hurt. What should we do?"

_Breathe and think,_ Shepard told herself. "Don't panic, EDI. Just... call Dr. Chakwas, okay? I'll be up there in a few minutes."

"I'm with you." Kaidan jumped to his feet.

They ran to the captain's cabin. In other circumstances, she might have laughed and think EDI was overreacting. But Shepard still worried about that bio-amp despite Mealon's suggestion.

When they reached the cabin, Dr. Chakwas was already there. However, the door was locked.

"EDI," Shepard asked the AI, worried. "Why is the door locked?"

"Doctor's order. She said; it was for Butterfly's sake."

"Can you tell us what they're doing?" Kaidan asked. He trusted Dr. Chakwas, but this was his child.

"Dr. Chakwas is cleaning the room. Butterfly is taking a shower."

Shepard thought she knew what had happened. "Perhaps she's just... Oh, we're overreacting. But I really forgot about it."

"What?" her boyfriend still didn't get it.

"It's... a woman thing. Something that happens every month. Butterfly probably had no idea about it and panicked. Shit, Cerberus aged her completely."

"Oh!" He had female cousins, and was not completely clueless, "You mean... she is having her period? Ok, technically, Butterfly is a baby. But she still needs to know the basics. Between you and me, who will teach her about puberty and what it entails?"

For once, Shepard just gasped. She tried to say something but couldn't find the words.

"Excuse me." EDI interjected. "Can I suggest Dr. Chakwas? She is a human female and a doctor. Besides, Butterfly trusts her."

"That's a great idea, thanks EDI," Shepard said.

The couple sighed in relief. Sex is not an easy topic to speak with your kid, especially one that was still a baby.

They waited until the door finally opened. Chakwas walked out with an awkward smile. She was still in her PJ's. "Butterfly is fine, Commander. I gave her some pills and she is already sleeping. She is just having her first period, she didn't know, of course and panicked."

"I understand, doc. Her aging isn't natural. Neither of us ever had thought about teaching her," Shepard said.

"Well, things are always more complicated for a woman. I'm not sure how Cerberus aged her but I'm rather sure it involved with growing her hormones. Butterfly might have some problem controlling herself. I don't mean she is going to be running around with a butcher knife. She just will... well, be moody like an old hag, at least for a few days."

_Great, just great,_ Shepard groaned. "I... Well, I have the details about project Caterpillar but I do not quite understand it. Perhaps I ought to forward it to you."

Shepard wasn't a good reader. Her skills in reading and writing were terrible, leading her to spend a lot of time writing her reports.

"That will be great, Commander. I have a feeling I should keep my eyes on her. Butterfly's body isn't exactly ordinary. I just hope Cerberus didn't make any mistakes when they aged her." Despite the advance technology, humans are still humans. Cerberus loved to play God, but the results were not always as planned.

"We don't have many options. It seems we just have to wait and see."

"Um, I think that brings up another question." Kaidan seemed worried. "We will land on Tuchanka in thirty minutes but we can't go on the mission together. I have to stay with Butterfly."

Shepard wanted to have him with her. But Kaidan was right, they shouldn't leave Butterfly alone. "I trust you to take care of her. Since we are going to rescue a turian platoon, I think I ought to bring Garrus along. EDI, you'll come with me too."

"Copy that, Shepard," the AI replied.

"I should go change to more proper attire," The doctor tried to not yawn. "Some of the crew might have hangovers. They will need me."

"Thanks again, doc." Perhaps she should ask for Chakwas help another time. The good doctor was tired already.

Chakwas was going to step into the elevator but paused. "And oh, I almost forgot. I told Butterfly about the basics of human anatomy but she might not completely understand. Just...be prepared for the hard questions."

The couple stood there, not saying a thing even after the elevator doors closed.

* * *

To Trishata96: Don't trust me too much, dear. I could mess his life up. Truely, I don't hate James. But it's too much fun toying with the guy. By the way, I thought of Butterfly as a baby, so no romance for her.

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta :D Let's me hug you.


	34. Dancing with devil

"Everything in the universe has a rhythm, everything dances."

_-Maya Angelou_

* * *

**Dancing with the Devil**

* * *

It had been sometime since he had drunk enough for a hangover. James wasn't surprised that he woke up with a throbbing head. It wasn't enough to make him sick, it just made him irritable.

And nothing was more unwelcome at this moment than the woman in front of him.

Butterfly tramped into the shuttle bay, each step sounded like an anvil falling from the sky. James was sure she was doing it on purpose.

"What do you want?" The lieutenant asked harshly.

_Wrong move._

Crossing her arms, Butterfly tilted her head and shot him a _'Fucking Commander Shepard'_ look. "I want an update to my Omni-Tool. Aunty Traynor said you can do it."

"That's Esteban... I mean, your Uncle Cortez's duty."

Butterfly rolled her eyes. "I know. But he isn't here. He flew mommy to Tuchanka. They left me here!"

"They are on a mission. Your mom wouldn't allow you to follow, yet. And please, lower your voice. Not everyone here is able to handle your screech."

"I was not screeching. Now I'm screeching." She purposely yelled into his ears.

"Geez, stop it, woman! No wonder Lola doesn't want you with her. You're so bitchy today." James yelled back and it was like adding oil to the fire.

Angrily, the girl slammed his table loudly. "I hate this body, but I can kick your ass with it. Bring it on, lieutenant!"

"Bring it... What?"

"You seem like you're in need of a swift kick in the ass." _This must be Wrex's influence,_ James thought. The Shepard women were Krogan's in human bodies. "Let's dance, Mr. Vega."

Countless times, he jumped into the fight without fear. But he had never been challenged by a baby girl. "I'm not beating a girl."

"Fear of defeat?" Butterfly tilted her brow, giving him '_Alenko's'_ eyes.

_Damn, she is as crazy as her mom._ James sighed.

"Look, Princess. You're smaller than me almost by half. I don't want to hurt you. Lola will kill me for it."

"Oh, you mean you fear mommy? She is taller than me only by a few centimeters and I saw you 'dance' together several times. Stop making excuses. If you're chicken, just say it." Stubborn like her dad, Butterfly didn't back down.

_What an annoying woman?_ "Don't say I didn't warn you, Princess. I'll teach you not to cross a real man."

"Real man? I don't see any man around here."

_That mouth... Uncle Joker would be proud_. James groaned.

* * *

Kaidan was reading Marian's dossier when EDI called him. Even though her platform wasn't on board, her software was always in the Normandy. The AI sounded even more panicked than last night.

"Emergency. The XO's presence is required in the shuttle bay ASAP."

"What's happening, EDI?"

Before the AI answered, he heard another voice. "Shit, don't tell him yet, EDI."

"Joker, are you hiding something?" The helmsman wasn't hard to read at all.

"Hiding something? What makes you think I'm hiding anything?"

Sighing, Kaidan ignored the man and talked to the AI. "EDI, tell me the situation."

"Butterfly and Lieutenant Vega are fighting. You better stop them, Major." The AI sounded worry.

Butterfly beat Kai Leng, so he knew James wouldn't stand a chance against her. "Joker, you don't want me to know because you're making a bet on them, aren't you?"

"No, I'm not!" The pilot answered too quickly and too loud.

"Jeff." EDI warned.

He sighed. "It isn't exactly a bet since everyone's credits are on Butterfly."

Kaidan slapped his forehead. "Alright, where are they, EDI?"

"In the shuttle bay. The match just started."

In the background, Joker grumbled. "Spoilsport."

The Major rolled his eyes. Before heading to the elevator, he stopped at Liara's office.

"Liara, I need you." He almost shouted.

The asari blinked. In the screen, Feron choked. "But Kaidan... You're spoken for."

Stunned, Kaidan blinked for a minute. "That wasn't what I mean, Liara. I need your help, not... That."

It was hard to know if she was joking or simply naive. The asari looked sincere in her previous statement. Liara shook her head and said, "What can I do for you, Major?"

"James is going to get himself killed." Kaidan said bluntly.

"What? Are we under attack? Why didn't I know anything?"

"Wait, you didn't know? No offense Liara. But the powerful Shadow Broker didn't know what was happening in the ship?"

"I..." He had a point. "I think I rely on EDI too much. I wouldn't know anything if she didn't inform me. Goddess, perhaps I ought to leave this room more often."

"Good idea." The drell agreed. "You need to relax."

"I'll think about it later. Now, I want to know what's happening."

"I'm not sure why, but Butterfly and James are fighting. I'm going to stop them but I need you to back me up in case anything goes wrong."

"Are you sure they're fighting, Kaidan? It could be a friendly spar. James calls it 'dancing' and he's danced with Shepard several times."

"I don't know about him, but I know Butterfly. She is capable but still inexperienced. She doesn't know when to hold back. Believe me, Butterfly is deadly serious."

"I can't believe Butterfly would injure one of her family members." And then she paused. "Goddess, she doesn't consider James to be family."

"I'm afraid so." Kaidan sighed.

* * *

Some watched through the monitors, some watched from the sidelines, the crew wouldn't miss this match for anything. They wanted to know their niece's capabilities.

In the makeshift ring, the opponents were walking around each other. Both of them were waiting for the right time to strike, despite the audience's impatience.

_This little princess beat Kai Leng,_ James remembered. He wouldn't go soft or underestimate her. Still, he wanted to know her strength. Finally, he made the first move.

To his surprise, Butterfly dodged too slowly. His fist missed her face by a few centimeters when she slid backward.

"That's the best you can do?" She just wanted to see his speed.

The look she gave him... James swore it wasn't the same sweet girl everyone knew and loved. Her eyes shone with mirth and a side of sinister.

Irate, James released another punch. But this time Butterfly just flashed away. Before he knew it, the Lieutenant found himself on his back, a small body sat on his chest.

When he thought back, he remembered the woman swept his arm aside. In the same move, she spun around and then hooked his neck with her right leg as her left kicked his calf. With help from her hands and momentum, she tossed him to the floor and sat on his chest.

He should be ashamed, angry or something. But when he took a deep breath and inhaled her scent, James couldn't think. With his strong arm, he rolled and flipped them over. With his weight, he pinned the small frame beneath him.

"Don't be so sure of yourself, Princess."

If looks could kill, James would be soaked in blood. She was pissed and ready to strike back. James didn't see it coming until she headbutted him.

Uncle Wrex and Big-G would be proud.

The Lieutenant saw stars. Butterfly took a chance and kicked him off her. The crowd cheered in enjoyment.

"Don't be so sure of yourself, Lieutenant." She said with a lopsided smile.

They jumped to their feet, ready for the next round. However, James couldn't help but be distracted by the sight.

In between the fight, Butterfly's braid loosened. Her wavy hair swung in the air like raven wings. His eyes followed one of the curly locks to her pink cheeks and pink lips. Her chest rose and fell every breathe she took.

_This isn't fair,_ he thought.

"Enough!" The Major yelled, effectively stopping the rivals.

Butterfly looked like a girl who was caught red-handed trying to steal cookies. She jumped and hid her hands behind her back. James almost mirrored her gesture but looked less adorable.

"Dismissed, everyone." Kaidan ordered. The crew left, begrudgingly. The only people who stayed were the rivals, the Major, and the asari. And although Kaidan hadn't said anything, Butterfly knew he was disappointed.

The girl kept looking at the floor, too ashamed to look into his eyes.

"Care to explain, either of you?"

James half expected to hear the girl blame him for starting the fight.

"I'm sorry, daddy." _That was a surprise. Here, I thought I would be thrown in the brig._

But that didn't please the Major. "Butterfly Ashley Shepard-Alenko; don't give me that."

_Ashley... Wasn't that a name on the memorial wall?_

"I started it." She admitted. "I don't know what's gotten into me, but I know I did wrong."

The biotic daddy sighed. "Go back to your room and we'll talk later. I need to talk with the lieutenant."

Butterfly pouted. She stomped all the way to the elevator. Liara followed in concern.

"I hate it when she does that." The daddy sighed.

"Tell me about it." James understood.

But Kaidan shot him a murderous glare. The younger man knew he was in trouble.

"Let me be clear, lieutenant. I know Butterfly started the fight, but that doesn't mean you're out of it. She is a baby. She doesn't think of the consequences of her actions. But you are the grown-up. You are supposed to be reasonable."

He had a point. James couldn't dispute.

"I'm sorry, sir."

Kaidan frowned deeply. "You will be punished, but there's another thing I must say. My daughter is still a baby, despite her body. And you should keep that in mind."

James couldn't believe what he had heard. "What? You think I... No, Major. I'm not a pedophile. I have no interest in your baby girl."

The Major wasn't convinced. "I'm watching you, lieutenant."

* * *

You're in trouble now, Mr. Gorilla.

Thank The Lonely Traveler for Beta :D


	35. Prepare

"Chaos is inherent in all compounded things. Strive on with diligence."

_-Buddha_

* * *

**Prepare**

* * *

The starboard observation was quiet and dim. Shepard almost feared disrupting the peaceful silence. Carefully, she walked inside to let the door close, so the light outside did not disturb the twinkling stars.

Gentle light illuminated the room. On the floor, Kaidan was sitting on a mat, leaning on the couch. Butterfly's head was on his lap as he massaged the back of her head.

Shepard placed her hand on his shoulder and looked questioningly at Butterfly.

The Major held and kissed her hand and said, "Surgical wound."

Sleepily, the girl looked at her mother. "Mommy, you're home."

"Yes, I'm home." After what she saw today, she really wanted to hold Butterfly. But the girl looked so ill. "How are you feeling, B?"

"I'm fine," although her face said otherwise. Like her mom, she wouldn't show her weaknesses.

"Shush, sleep Princess." Kaidan gently rubbed her head and set her on the pillow. "Don't worry. I'll be here if you have a nightmare."

Nightmare… Shepard knew what it meant, and was worried. She couldn't help her daughter escape from the nightmares.

Butterfly frowned as she tried to sleep. She relaxed when her dad placed headphones over her ears. Classical music slowly soothed her to a slumber.

The parents waited until she slept then changed their positions. Shepard realized her boyfriend had something to say so she followed when he led her to another couch in the corner of the room.

"I believe EDI already reported to you," he started.

"About Butterfly's fight with James? Yeah, she gave me a full report. I haven't seen the security footage yet but I heard she gave him quite a thrashing." She was proud of her daughter but the father didn't agree.

Sternly, Kaidan shot her a disapproving glare. "It's not funny, Amala. I know I can't keep you two out of a fight, but at least we should give Butterfly proper training before throwing her into the battlefield."

"Wrex would gladly help. He always wanted to teach B how to shoot a shotgun. Besides, didn't you send her off alone to fight Kai Leng?"

He had a feeling they were going to have another hot argument. God, he hated it. "Let me be clear, love. First, I didn't know Kai Leng was there. And second, I didn't send her off alone. Butterfly was assisting Thane. But things are never simple for the Shepard women, I guess."

"Afraid not. But isn't that what you love about me?"

"Aye. But that doesn't mean I will stop worrying."

"Oh, poor Major. He has a pair of handful of ladies to take care of."

"The hardest and most terrifying job in galaxy, but I wouldn't trade it for anything." Kaidan held her.

She let herself enjoy his warmth for a while before reverting to business mode. "I agree. B needs a lot of training. But about the nightmare you mention earlier…"

"Butterfly said she had a strange dream. I'm not sure if it was a childhood fear like a monster in the wardrobe or..."

"She always had problem sleeping. But I fear it might have gotten worse after… whatever Cerberus did to her."

"Makes sense. I feel terrible that I can do nothing to prevent it."

They fell silent. Both knew Butterfly was damaged but didn't dare say it.

Kaidan ran his fingers through his hair awkwardly. "What about the mission? Wrex called me. He ranted about a bomb and turians but it was hard to understand him while he was yelling."

"Well... It appears the Primarch didn't tell me the whole truth. Long time ago, the turians buried a bomb beneath Tuchanka's surface, in case the krogans tried to rise up again, they'd bomb the whole planet. Cerberus found out about the bomb and tried to detonate it. The turians sent the 9th platoon to disable it in secret."

"Of course there was a conflict?"

Shepard smirked sarcastically. "Yep, my life has never been easy. The 9th platoon's ships were shot down and then they were attacked by Reaper's troops while Cerberus was digging the bomb."

"Let me guess. You helped the rest of the platoon disable the bomb without informing Wrex."

"The alliance between krogan and turian is still fragile. I don't want to make it more complicated. We don't have time for impediments. He must have raged when he found out about it afterward." Shepard sighed.

Kaidan knew she was hiding something. "You lost someone."

There was no use denying it. "Yeah, lieutenant Victus. He was Primarch Victus son."

The Major didn't know what to say. As a father, he understood the Primarch's sorrow. When Butterfly was taken, his world crumbled.

"He died bravely. Although he made a bad decision that got most of his unit killed, he tried to complete his mission." She ignored telling him the man almost gave up, but she persuaded him to change his mind. "Primarch Victus said he proud of his boy but... I can't stop thinking. What if I lose Butterfly like that? No one has said it yet but I know the Alliance would use her as a war asset. Sooner or later, we have to let her join this war."

Despite her age, Butterfly's ability was valuable. And they couldn't be selfish by keeping her safe while the whole galaxy brunt down.

They were parents, yes. But they were also Alliance soldiers. Duty always came first.

"I know, Amala. I know." Kaidan tried to soothe her. "But we won't just throw her out of this ship unarmed. We will teach her to fight, to survive. It's the best we can do for her now."

Shepard smiled and held him tight. She wanted to stay like that but she still had things to say. "I was thinking. What would you think if I ask one of our friends to be B's godparent?"

"Good idea. But who?"

"I haven't made a decision yet. There are so many choices." She thought about each of their friends. "Garrus is like a big brother I never had. Liara is trustworthy and she loves B so much. Wrex, Bakara, Chakwas, and Joker... Really, I can't choose."

Thinking about the people in the list, Kaidan couldn't help but laugh. "Wrex would make her a warlord. And Joker... well, I wonder if he would be able to keep up with our swift Butterfly."

"Hey, I heard that!" Joker protested via intercom.

The couple laughed. They knew they didn't have complete privacy. But the pilot had kept quiet long enough.

"I think Chakwas is the best choice since she's already taking care of Butterfly." Kaidan ignored the nosy helmsman. "Garrus and Liara are good too, but I don't know if they understand human culture or nature."

"Oh, you're right. I forgot about that. But... I don't know. I think I want to ask Bakara to be B's godmother."

"Urdnot Bakara, the krogan? What's your reasoning Amala."

"I'm not sure." The thought of her big friend made her smile, though. "But Butterfly calls her mother. Bakara is lovely for a krogan. She is a sweetheart."

"I never thought I would ever hear anyone describe a krogan with the word sweet." Unconsciously, Kaidan set his girlfriend on his lap. They were cuddling while watching their daughter sleep.

"We'll meet her tomorrow. You can see for yourself." Her words lost as she stared into his eyes. Instantly, she knew it wasn't the time to talk about someone else.

"Your cabin?" Kaidan asked.

Shepard hesitated. She looked over at her little girl and laughed.

Following her stare, the Major chuckled. "She is too smart for her own good."

On the mat, Butterfly turned around turning her rear to them. She also pressed her earphones with both hands to keep them covered on her ears tighter.

She didn't know what they were doing. (Miranda said she would understand it when she was older.) But it was really embarrassing to watch.

"We'd be very bad parents if we sneaked off and left our little girl alone. You promised to keep her safe, didn't you?"

"You're right. But... well, have you ever thought about... um, Butterfly's new bedroom? I mean..."

"I know what you mean." Shepard replied with a smile. "I think it's quite necessary. But no, I don't want her to move out because I want you to move in."

"You had plans to move someone else in?"

She hit him not so gently. "I may if you don't stop teasing me."

Kaidan chuckled and kissed her. Shepard fought just to save some of her dignity before yielding. "You have another reason to kick her out?"

"Oh please, you say it like I am an evil step-mother. I just think B ought to have her own room. Grunt's old room is still vacant. We can add more furniture and other decorations."

"Sounds good. I believe we have a bed and a footlocker in stock. But I still wonder if Butterfly will understand." Butterfly didn't want to give them problems, so she'd move. He knew it. But Kaidan really didn't like forcing his daughter into following an order.

"We can talk to her later. Right now, I need my sleep." And then, she shifted her position until she lay comfortably on his chest.

Kaidan shifted as well and they fell asleep on the couch.

* * *

Thank to The Lonely Traveler for the beta. :)


	36. Runaway

"The way is not in the sky. The way is in the heart."

_-Buddha_

* * *

**Runaway**

* * *

Once a thriving and promising planet, a civil war destroyed Tuchanka and the krogan's civilization. Now, it was only a gigantic radioactive wasteland. Although the sight of hope was found in the ancient krogan's ruin, it was still far from green. The planet and her habitats were still rough, tough but surprisingly friendly.

Shepard remembered the last time she was in Wrex's camp. The place wasn't more than a ruin. But now, there were more tents and people. They were preparing for the war.

However, instead of Wrex, Bakara was waiting for them near the landing pad. The female shaman was happy to see the Commander. She walked to Shepard for a handshake but stopped as she saw the other woman.

Familiar brown eyes stared at the krogan. Bakara had a strange feeling she'd seen this little creature before.

And then, the human smiled.

Bakara knew that smile. "Butterfly?"

The girl jumped into her arms. If Bakara wasn't a krogan, she might have been thrown back.

"Missed you so much." Butterfly laughed between kissing the female shaman.

"Missed you too, dearly. I knew the Commander would find you. Truly, I'm glad to see you well but... Do humans grow this fast?" She was still little and soft. Butterfly's waist was so narrow; Bakara feared the human might break in half if she hugged her too tight.

Shepard smiled dryly. "It's a long story. But first, I'd like to introduce Major Kaidan Alenko. He is Butterfly's father." She presented.

"Glad to meet you. I suppose you're Urdnot Bakara. Butterfly and Shepard spoke highly of you." The Major shook the female krogan's hand. Bakara gave him a different feeling from the other krogans he had met.

"Oh, the Commander's mate. Glad to see you as well, Major. Wrex spoke a lot about you, not many of them good things but I never believed him." She replied honestly.

Kaidan blinked, he wasn't sure how to reply.

Shepard saved him "Why don't we go inside and find a place to sit down and talk?"

"I'd love to, but Wrex is talking business with the great mother. We shouldn't disrupt them." Bakara looked distressed.

Shepard had met a krogan shaman before, but she had never heard about the great mother. "Great mother, who is she?"

"She is the oldest and a well-respect krogan. Although Wrex isn't happy to see her, he can't deny her request."

"Seriously? It's hard to imagine Wrex following an old woman's order." The Commander tried to think about it, and then laughed.

"She is his mother."

"Wrex's mother! I never heard him say anything about her."

"In our tradition, a mother takes care of her children until they're ten. After that, the male goes to warrior training and hardly see their mother. Wrex isn't so close with her, but he respects her..."

Before Bakara finished her sentence, a very large female krogan came into their view. She wasn't just big, but also graceful. Shepard didn't know who she was but still looked at the krogan in awe.

Every step she took made a loud noise because of her cane. Somehow that reminded the Commander of the mother who took care of the orphanage she lived in. Mother Melanie was a good person, but too strict.

Just looking at the great mother, she felt funny.

The krogan stopped walking as she noticed the human. Humans weren't a normal occurrence in Tuchanka. The big female narrowed her eyes, staring down from her height.

"We do not have many visitors. Very few humans are able to roam our planet freely. I suppose you are Commander Shepard. I have no name; I gave it up when I became a female shaman. But you can call me the great mother." Because of her veil, they couldn't see her entire face. The krogan showed her gratitude by bowing down. "You helped us cure the genophage and gave us hope. You have my eternal gratitude, human."

Shepard swallowed hard. "I... I just helped a friend in need. No need to thank me. Besides, my actions wouldn't mean anything if not for Mordin's sacrifice."

"Most of the races in galaxy see us as barbarians but you call us a friend. That thought alone is much appreciated," The krogan insisted.

_You can't argue with a giant krogan,_ Shepard thought. "The honor is mine, great mother."

The great mother looked at Shepard's companions. Her eyes locked on the young human with great interest. "Is this your brood, Commander? Such a fine potential but lost."

Confused, the couple exchanged a stare. But Bakara seemed very concerned.

"What does it mean, mother?"

Butterfly swallowed hard as the krogan poked her head and then her chest. "Although you know your destiny, you still do not know the way. I understand your fear. It is a difficult road for a youngling like you."

Shepard didn't understand any of it. She was about to ask when Wrex came out from his throne room and greeted them with a shout.

"Why are you still here, old woman!?"

Judging from the look on the female shaman's face, Shepard was sure the battlemaster was going to have a big problem. Unfortunately, Wrex didn't seem to notice. He was still barking at his mother.

"If you aren't going to help, just leave. I have come this far without your help, I don't need you now."

Clank! The Commander jumped as the sound of a wooden cane hit Wrex's skull. The battlemaster ordered her to stop but that only made her hit him again and again.

"You brats are the same." She growled. "Impatient, inconsiderate and presumptuous, you are just like your father!"

The mother raised her arm high. Wrex guarded his head with his arms as he braved himself for another hit. However, it never happened. His mother didn't hit him but Shepard screamed so loud.

"Butterfly!"

The battlemaster opened his eyes and found a young female human standing between him and a very angry female krogan. The wooden cane stopped only a few centimeters from her forehead.

Still trembling, Butterfly sputtered. "Please stop, grandma. This isn't going to solve anything."

The old krogan stared at her. Kaidan and Shepard said nothing but their biotics flared. It felt like an eternity until the great mother lowered her cane.

"The fruit does not fall far from its tree. You are as brave as your mother, young one," She chuckled softly. "Do not worry. I did not mean to kill my son. This airhead just needs someone to knock some sense into him. And since his skull is thick, I have to knock harder..."

"Why are you fighting each other?" Annoyed, Butterfly cut her off.

"My son wants us krogans to begin making babies. But my girls are not breeding machines. After centuries of suffering, we need time to adjust our bodies and minds."

"That's a good point. Why is uncle Wrex angry?"

"We're going to war. Any of us can die. I just want to leave evidence of my existence in case I don't make it back." Wrex quickly explained. "It's not my fault that many of my men think the same thing."

"But you did not tell me that," The mother retorted.

"Like you would ever listen," The battlemaster snapped back.

"Well, if you're busy, we can come back later," Shepard said.

"Stay, Shepard. I'm done talking with her. We're going to have one hell of party since my niece is back. Alenko is welcomed too." He lifted Butterfly up as if she weighed nothing. "I'm glad you're back, little one, although you're bigger now. I never knew your kind grew up so quickly. And I hope your father has a good reason for not telling me that you were saved when we talked yesterday."

"It was supposed to be a surprise." The father tried to look amused.

The bigger guy frowned.

"He's still mad for what I said on Horizon?" Kaidan asked his girlfriend.

Shepard smiled awkwardly. After Horizon, she called Wrex and told him of her pain. The battlemaster had been mad with the man ever since.

But Butterfly wasn't going to let the subject slide. "You can't just dismiss grandma like that, uncle. Both of you wish the best for your people. It's probably not my business but I believe you should talk."

"I am a krogan, Butterfly." Wrex sighed. "Male krogans weren't made for diplomacy."

"But what you said earlier it's quiet cunning. 'The evidence of my existence.' That's almost poetic." Shepard just had to mention it.

"What! Just because I'm a badass doesn't mean I can't admire the flowers." He glared at his mother. "Just don't expect me to write poems."

"Told you. He is a mutant." Bakara added.

Wrex made a face. However, the situation lightened when everyone laughed.

"You have to reach a middle ground for both of you, I believe." Butterfly still tried to help. Her smile did strange things to mother and son.

No one was able to look into those eyes without becoming enthralled. The great mother wasn't an exception.

"I ought to let young people make the tough decision, perhaps." She gave up. "But you must tell your boys to be polite, Wrex. I will not stand for rude... courting. Anyone who steps over their boundary will be made an example."

Shepard had an idea what being made an example meant in krogan culture.

"Deal," Wrex snarled. "I know the females suffered all those centuries. I intend to change it."

The great mother sighed. But it looked more like she was relieved. "I better go now. Commander if you have time, I have something I wish to discuss with you. Bakara knows my place. She can bring you to me whenever you want."

Shepard had a bad feeling about this. "Can't we talk now?"

"It is about your child, Commander. She needs to center herself, and I have a solution for her problem."

Bakara seemed to know what she meant. The shaman stared at her in terror. "Butterfly is a human, great mother. Would it work for her?"

"All souls are the same, child. Commander's child is powerful, but this power is a double-edged sword. She has to learn how to wield it. Otherwise, she might cause herself and her family pain."

"B is an adept. I knew it." Shepard didn't like the sound of it. "I don't want to sound ungrateful or anything, but we humans know how to handle biotics. Kaidan and I are biotics ourselves. We can train her."

The krogan held her head. For her, it felt like talking with an ignorant child. "You do not understand. I am not talking about biotics. It is her spirit that needs guidance. Your child understands what I said."

Shepard turned to her daughter.

Absent-minded, Butterfly touched the back of her skull where she had been branded by a slave collar. The hated scar had been replaced with a surgical cut but she still felt the pain.

Worried, the Commander asked. "B, are you alright?"

"I... I think I need her help, mommy." She looked upset.

Shepard didn't get it, but she knew her daughter kept something from her. "Is there anything I should know, B?"

Butterfly was an honest person. Although she didn't say it, her eyes revealed her thoughts.

"I'm not sure, mommy. The day I got this scar, something in me changed. I got along with it just fine, but after Lamia... I felt a change but I don't know what it is. I want an answer."

"Wait," Kaidan interrupted. "What scar? Did someone hurt you, Princess?"

Shepard's face dropped. She knew he wouldn't like the answer. Although it wasn't their fault, she still hated herself for not keeping Butterfly safe.

"Excuse me, Major." Bakara seemed to know what she was thinking and decided to save her. "But I believe that topic isn't something we should discuss right now."

Kaidan wasn't an unreasonable person. He knew when he ought to stay quiet. "You're right. Perhaps we'll talk another time."

Silently, Shepard squeezed his hand, promising to tell him later. She didn't want to keep it from him, but she couldn't talk about it again without crying. The Commander Shepard couldn't show any weakness.

"I will let you think. Until another time." The old krogan left. Other females had driven a convoy to pick her up.

An awkward silence occupied the place until Wrex broke the atmosphere. "Is it just me, or doesn't anyone want to drink?"

They laughed as Bakara smacked her husband.

* * *

Wrex wasn't exaggerating when he said, krogan booze kicks harder than a krogan. Just a few shots and Shepard felt dizzy. She stopped drinking because she didn't want to set a bad example for her daughter.

Krogan weren't known for their etiquette. Although, Grunt rushed through the desert to see Butterfly, some young krogans were too drunk to watch their tongues and made lewd comments towards her. The big brother taught them manners by head butting them.

Most of the Normandy's crew was also having their fun. Well, everything was good until someone encouraged James to strip and the man just too drunk to deny it.

Kaidan chocked on his drink as Shepard hurried to drag their daughter from the party. Butterfly had already asked them where babies came from though she didn't have to know about the equipment for making babies right now.

Mother and child left the small chaos behind. They stopped by a varren pit. Urz was waving his tail madly as he saw them. It was only a few hours after their first meeting, but the varren too, was taken by Butterfly's charm.

"Can we have him, mommy? I mean, with us, on the Normandy," The girl asked.

"I'd love to. But I'm afraid the crew won't be happy having him on board. Not everyone is an animal lover. Besides, he isn't getting along with your uncle Garrus. Last time, he bit your uncle and the guy had a terrible flu. He is allergic to varren's saliva. Mordin fussed over him for weeks until Garrus threatened him to stop." The old memory made Shepard smile. However, she paused when she remembered the hyperactive doctor was gone. He never had a chance to say goodbye to Butterfly. The girl was the only one he called family after all those lonely years.

"He was a good person." As if Butterfly could read her mind, the girl smiled sadly. "One dies, many rise. His bravery will be remembered."

Butterfly's whiskey-brown eyes held much sadness. Shepard couldn't look at them. "Before he died, he said..."

"He was sorry because we'd never see each other again. I knew it."

_Wait..._ "How could you know that, B? I never told anyone."

Shepard almost heard Butterfly's brain working as she considered her words.

"I don't know if you'd believe me. But every time I dream about someone saying goodbye to me, I'd find out they were dead later."

That didn't sound possible. But Commander Shepard had seen a lot of impossibilities. "You dreamed about him?"

Butterfly nodded. "They kept my body in that tank, but my consciousness ran free."

It was embarrassing. Shepard wasn't quite sure she understood what her daughter said.

Sighing, the girl knew her mother was confused. "Mary told me no one would believe me. She was right."

"I'm not... I just don't understand." Shepard protested. "You always speak like... Sometimes, I'm not sure if I'm too dense or you're..."

"A freak?" She didn't sound angry, though.

"What? Hell, no! I'd never think of you like that. You're my daughter." Shepard tried to laugh. "When I was young, humans still knew almost nothing about biotics. Even the reds... people I worked with called me a freak. And now, here I am. Being different doesn't mean you're a bad person, B."

Butterfly smiled but said nothing. For a while, they just sat in silence.

Finally, the girl spoke. "I think I should tell you something, although you might not believe it."

"You can tell me anything, my girl." The nights on Tuchanka were cold. Shepard held her daughter tight to keep them both warm, body and soul.

"I... It sounds crazy even in my head."

"Just try to tell me, B." Shepard had seen a lot in her journeys.

"Yeah, let's get it over with." The girl sighed. "Do you remember my scar, mommy?"

"How could I forget?" It felt like it was her fault and it had almost cost her daughter's life. A mother would never forget it.

"When they placed the collar on me, it hurt so much. Mary said it was only a few seconds I suffered, but it felt like an eternity." Her voice cracked. Just thinking about it made Butterfly shiver with fear. "It was for a few minutes... but I died."

That wasn't something she expected to hear. "But you look... very alive to me."

"Mary resuscitated me, even though I was dead for ten minutes. It was the longest ten minutes of my entire life... Not that I had lived for long, though." Just like her mother, sometimes Butterfly's jokes were untimely.

Shepard wanted to say something, but she saw Butterfly's tears began to fall.

"I saw my body when my consciousness left this world. And then... it didn't feel like dying or... anything. It felt like traveling through the universe in a split second, faster than light. I'd seen, learned and felt so many things in many realms. But well... I couldn't understand most of them."

_It could be a hallucination or faulty memories,_ Shepard thought in horror. She should call Maelon ASAP.

Butterfly noticed her expression. She pushed herself out of her mother's arm furiously. "You don't believe me."

Shepard felt a pang of a headache. "You must forgive me. What you said was... it doesn't sound possible." _Or sane,_ "Look, I know you aren't lying. But just because you believe it doesn't make it real."

Biting her lip and clenching her hands, the girl tried to control herself. Kaidan had begun teaching her to how to control her biotics.

"I should have known." She sighed after calming down.

The conversation was far from over. Shepard tried to speak but Butterfly waved her off.

"Don't. Just don't say a word. I don't want to listen. Please leave me alone."

Butterfly told her a secret, but she didn't believe it. It sounded like a treachery, although Shepard didn't mean it. Perhaps she ought to give the girl some time to cool down.

"I... Ok. I'll be outside. If you want anything..."

Butterfly was holding Urz, turning her back to her mom.

_I swear. She got this after her dad._ Shepard sighed and then left.

* * *

Just when she stepped out of the varren pit, Shepard was greeted with a familiar voice.

"Hey, where have you been? I was looking for you." Kaidan didn't wait for an answer though. He pulled her close for a quick kiss before she had any chance to protest.

Despite her concern, Shepard snuggled to him. "I think I messed it up again."

The Major tilted his eyebrow.

That simple gesture always made her express everything. Tonight wasn't different. "Butterfly told me a secret. But I... don't believe her. I think she is angry at me now."

"It's alright. Butterfly loves you. She won't be angry with you for long." He kissed her again on her forehead. Kaidan knew his girlfriend loved to be cherished especially by a simple touch. "But I think I can talk to her."

"Yeah but..." Perhaps she ought to tell him. If Kaidan reacted to the girl like she did, Butterfly might lose control.

Shepard was going to tell him as she saw a convoy leave. It could be anyone but she had a strange feeling.

"Kai... Come with me."

They ran into the pit, but Butterfly was gone. Urz wasn't there either.

"What's wrong, Amala? And where is Butterfly?" Confused, he asked.

She tried to think, but her brainstopped functioning. "I don't know! She said she wanted to be alone so I left her here. I don't know where she is."

Yelling at each other didn't help. Kaidan tried to calm down. "Alright, let's think. Butterfly isn't a girl that will run away because she is upset. She probably just returned to the Normandy. I'll track her Omni-tool."

"Good idea," Shepard waited and let Kaidan do his job. Still, she kept pacing around nervously.

_Wait!_ If Butterfly were going back to the Normandy, she wouldn't bring Urz with her. And if anyone took her unwillingly, she and the varren would fight.

She ran somewhere by her own will. But where, and why?

"Shepard!" Grunt stormed into the pit. "Butterfly took my Convoy. She left me a message."

"What did she say?" The couple asked in unison.

"She said she had to go somewhere." Grunt wasn't good at reading or writing. He had to read it twice to make sure he understood it. "She's sorry she left without warning but she will come back ASAP."

"Did she mention where she went?" Kaidan asked. He had no idea where she went since he knew next to nothing about this planet.

Come to think of it, this was the first time Butterfly was in Tuchanka. She didn't know this place, unless...

The couple exchanged a stare. "The great mother's!"

* * *

Since I couldn't find information about krogan culture anywhere (information in Mass effect Wiki is too brief for me), I made it up by using Spartan, Mongol and Ancient Egyptian culture. (Not that I'm the expert. Just the things I got from history class.) Well, I think they're quite similar in many ways. And their females were tough since their males were aggressive.

However, any reference about spirituality came from Buddhism. I grew up as a Buddhist so I am familiar with it. But most people might not get it. If there is anything I can explain, please let me know.

Thank The Lonely Traveler for Beta and moral support. :D


	37. Hidden Answer

"May it be a light to you in dark places, when all other lights go out."

_-J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring_

* * *

Hidden Answer

* * *

If the floor of the female clan's temple hadn't been made with stones, it would have been covered with human footsteps. Shepard kept pacing in a circle waiting for the old krogan.

The clan admitted Butterfly was there. But they didn't let her see the girl. The clan said she was in the middle of her pilgrimage. No one should disturb her.

Outside, the sun was rising. The Commander looked out to see her boyfriend and her adopted son. They weren't allowed in the temple because they were male, and had to wait in the convoy.

_Damn, why is the old hag so slow?_ Shepard mentally cursed. She had waited for hours but the great mother still hadn't show up. The servant said her mistress was sleeping, but the Commander didn't believe her.

At last, she ran out of patience.

The servant left her alone and the hallway was deserted. Shepard took a chance to sneak into the inner chamber. Although the temple was bigger than she thought, she found her way with the bug she planted in Butterfly's Omni-tool.

Not a long time after that, the Commander found Urz. The varren wouldn't bark but he let out a mewl as she came towards him.

"Hush, boy." She ordered as she checked on him. Urz was excited to see her. He was left to guard the door.

Someone had left him a bowl of food and placed it in front of a massive stone door. Only way to open it was using physical force.

Shepard carefully opened it as quiet as possible. It wasn't easy, though. The stone door weighed a ton.

Shepard sneaked into the room. Inside the stone hall was dim and quiet. The only source of light was a large light blue crystal on the far side of the room; her daughter was sitting near it. Well, she couldn't see the face since the girl's rear was to the door, but that couldn't be anyone but Butterfly.

As she walked towards the girl, she didn't notice the cracked stone floor and strange smoke that flowed from underneath.

However, she paused halfway. Would Butterfly be angry if she knew Shepard followed her? Should she wait until the girl was ready to talk?

After spending five minutes debating with herself, Shepard finally decided to talk to her. She walked to Butterfly who was sitting on her calves, facing the crystal. Her hand almost touched that small shoulder.

"Don't!"

Jumping, she turned around but found no one. She swore she could hear her heart beat. How could Butterfly stay in this room for hours?

Shepard turned around again. But she suddenly found herself looking at the endless stars. Beneath her feet was nothing but freezing space. She was... She was floating in space. Faraway, there was a light blue icy planet.

Alchera...

Impossible, this can't be real. She yelled but the voice faded away to nothingness. Her lungs were extremely hot as she inhaled the toxic gas.

_Dead, no!_ She unconsciously held her belly. _I don't want to lose my baby. Not again._

But it was impossible. The fire inside burned every fiber of her being. She couldn't resist when something was pulled out from her.

Something bright and blue hovered over her before splitting up to three glowing orbs. Their colors were blue, red, and grey.

Unconsciously, she reached for the grey one, but it shattered and faded away. Suddenly, the red one exploded. The shockwave almost knocked Shepard down if not for the blue one that shielded her.

Still, the light from the explosion was too much for her eyes. Shepard had to close her eyes until the light disappeared.

"Get up, Human."

She opened her eyes to see a group of female krogans. The only one who didn't look aggressive was Bakara.

"You violated the temple's rules, Shepard," Her krogan friend sighed.

But the Commander didn't care. "Where's my girl?"

"With her father," Bakara handed her a wet handkerchief. She gladly rubbed it on her face to get rid of any grime. "To be honest Shepard. If you weren't our friend, this would have ended ugly."

"I just wanted to see my daughter," Shepard retorted. "But tell me, what the hell happened to me? I... I think I saw things. It probably was a dream or..."

"A vision." The servants stepped aside, opened way for the great mother. "What you saw is a vision."

"What?"

"Beneath the prophecy hall is a gas pit. It opens your mind up to allow visions. But you never had practice, so you couldn't make much sense of it."

"Gas? Is it a hallucinogen gas? How could you let Butterfly...? Bakara, of all people, I can't believe you caged her in a dangerous gas pit." Shepard didn't believe in a spiritual world.

The old krogan just sighed. "Now I know why your brood does not want to speak with you."

"It isn't easy to believe my daughter is able to travel through dimensions. How could I know she just wasn't seeing things?"

"Really, human?" Annoyed, the great mother shook her head. "You are her mother, and you never noticed anything different? I am sure you know she is special. You just do not want to see it."

Still, Shepard couldn't accept it. "It's impossible. Please, I don't want to talk about this nonsense anymore. I just want to see my daughter. She needs to go to a hospital."

Everyone, even Bakara stiffened.

"Butterfly isn't insane, Commander. You are the one who is blinded by your bias." Her friend was disappointed.

Shepard was angry, but she wasn't sure who she was angry with. "Please, I hope you don't expect me to believe in... This is nonsense. It can't be real."

"If you told humans two hundred years ago that you could lift a ton of stone with your mind, would they believe you? Just because you don't believe it doesn't mean it isn't real," Bakara retorted.

She had a point. Shepard began to hesitate.

"You don't have to believe me or Butterfly. Don't you human have a saying don't jump to conclusions? Just hear her out before making up your mind."

"I..." Looking at Bakara, the Commander felt guilty. This krogan made a better mother than her. "I'll try. But it will be a long time until she opens up to me again. To be honest, I lost her twice. I'll be damned if I lose her again."

How ridiculous was it? She didn't even know if she would be able to look at Butterfly again without suspecting her state of sanity.

"She is your child. Eventually, she will come around."

Sighing, Shepard said, "I hope so."

* * *

When Shepard returned to the convoy, Grunt had gone back with the other convoy they had taken and returned to the Urdnot clan. Kaidan and Butterfly were waiting in the passenger seat. However, the girl was already asleep on her dad's lap. Urz sat near her quietly.

She looked at her boyfriend, questioning him without a word. But the Major shook his head.

Kaidan's Omni-tool beeped. Shepard was sitting on the opposite seat but she sent him a message.

_: How is she?_

_: She said she's tired. Other than that, she looks fine._ He replied._ : I'll ask Chakwas to examine her when we get back, just to be safe._

There were benefits with having a thoughtful lover. She was so glad she had him._ : Bakara said I was out for three hours. Did anything happen in the meantime?_

_: Besides a hangover crew, you have nothing to worry about._ Kaidan gave her a reassuring smile. _: Your crew can take care of themselves. No fuss, ma'am._

_: Seriously, you guys make me feel old. I guess the nuns that raised me felt the same._ Abruptly, she frowned. _: Tell me the truth, Kai. Has B ever told you anything about... her special ability?_

_: Talk to you later, Amala. She just told me something. But I want to prove it before I can say it for sure._

_: What happened?_

_: Can't talk right now._ She knew when he was upset.

Kaidan rarely kept anything from her. This must be important. Perhaps she shouldn't press him further.

_: Alright, I won't ask. But if there is anything I can help with, just ask, ok?_

The Major smiled. No, he wouldn't ask and she knew it. After all, he was too proud to ask. Stubborn man.

She moved to sit down near him. Their fingers intertwined as their thoughts fluttered away too far, faraway.

* * *

"Heck, I hate being old!" Ken Alenko grunted as he tried to remove a large pillar. He had been trapped under a ton of debris for days. In times like this, he wished he were a biotic like his son.

Thinking about his boy made him sigh. Two weeks ago, he helped his wife escape town and then returned to help the resistance. The situation was bad, but working with Clint and Anderson again made it more bearable.

And the news they got earlier... God, he couldn't believe he had a grandchild. His Kai had a baby with the Commander Shepard. He knew they had a thing but never thought it had a gone that far.

In normal circumstances, the Alliance would discharge them for fraternizing. But who would discharge the only one who might help them win the war against the killing machines? Besides… he hated to accept it but that girl could be a valuable war asset.

Despite what had happened to Butterfly, he loved the girl already. She gave him hope to survive.

Returning to duty, he and his team got the order to rescue civilians or burn the bodies to prevent the Reapers from turning them to Husks. Mostly, they found them dead, but three days ago they found a group of survivors in a shopping mall. Most of them were only kids, tired and injured but still able to move by themselves.

Clint ordered an emergency evacuation. The last Hammer was going to leave when a hoard of Reaper trolls broke into the mall. To buy them time, Ken and the old Commander stayed behind to cover their rear.

He couldn't remember much after two Ravagers shot at them. Perhaps those stupid creatures destroyed the whole place. The fallen ceiling killed all of the soulless bastards. He was glad he still alive although Clint wasn't with him.

_That guy is a tough son of a bitch,_ he thought. _I don't have to worry about him. Just focus on getting my ass out of here._

After a couple of hours stuck in the small place, Ken dumped himself on the floor.

"Grandpa,"

The soldier almost jumped. He was sure he was alone in this small space beneath the large debris. There wasn't room for someone else to hide. Where did that voice come from?

"Come here," that voice called again. And since he didn't have anything to lose, he followed it.

The voice came through the wall. But when he knocked on it, the echo sounded hollow.

_Perhaps this is my way out,_ Ken laughed like crazy. With new vigor, he broke the thin panel with his gun. As soon as the plank gave way, fresh air rushed in.

There was a hole behind the panel. Judging from the air and the light, this was his exit. Carefully, the soldier crawled out.

"Almost there," the childish voice rang again. This time it sounded closer.

The other side of the hole was larger. Ken reached out but someone grabbed his hand and then pulled.

"Alenko, you lucky bastard!" It was Clint.

Behind him was his squad. Two boys from Kaidan's biotic division had just joined the resistance a few days ago but they were very capable. It seemed they were trying to lift debris to find him.

Was there a girl in the area? He didn't see one.

"Hey, are you alright?" The old commander asked. "You look... rather pale. Should I call the medic?"

Ken almost didn't hear the man. He was deep in thought. "Did you see a girl?"

The three men looked at each other. One of the boys offered. "I'll call the doc."

"No, I'm fine. But... How did you find me?"

It was Clint's turn to act nervous. "Someone informed us. He said we would find you here."

Ken's Omni-tool had almost run out of energy. He couldn't contact anyone or even find his coordinates. How could anyone know his location?

He asked his friend. But the man had no idea. So he just asked another question. "Who told you my coordinates?"

"I know it sounds crazy." Clint shook his head. He still couldn't believe it either. "But it was your son."

* * *

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta :D


	38. Gossip

"We have a very limited time in life. Therefore, we must focus on things that are essential in life. Let go of all life's bark and sapwood. And concentrate on the heartwood only."

_- W. Vajiramedhi_

* * *

**Gossip**

* * *

Someone yanked her blanket off. Sleepily, Traynor tried to pull it back but the intruder won. The light in the female dormitory was too bright. She shielded her eyes.

"Five minutes, mom," She moaned.

But the other woman didn't care. "Get up, sleepy head. This is urgent. You have to see this!"

"Unless it's a collection of girls in tiny bikinis, I don't care." As she buried her head in her pillow, the specialist realized briefly the voice was Diana Allers.

_Note to self,_ she groaned. _Never drink krogan alcohol again._

"It's Commander Shepard."

As if someone had poked her with a needle, Traynor sprang from her bunk. "What? Commander Shepard in bikinis! Where's my camera?"

"You're such a pervert, Traynor." The reporter shook her head. "No, it's not the Commander wearing bikinis. But someone did a scoop on her... secret love life. I can't believe I didn't have this scoop before them!"

Traynor's eyes went wide and wider as Allers played the vid of some woman talking about Butterfly. The brunette suspected that Kaidan Alenko's daughter and Butterfly Shepard were the same person. The reporter ignored the fact the two girls were different ages.

"Damn," The specialist cursed. "The Commander will be pissed once she finds out."

"Well, that's obvious. Though, I'm kind of glad I didn't make this scoop." She didn't dare dig into Shepard's personal life since Butterfly was kidnapped. Allers felt guilty although she wasn't responsible for the abduction.

"As far as I know, the Commander doesn't watch this crap. Seriously, there's a war on. The Reapers might wipe us out but they're still concerned about Shepard's personal affairs? This is ridiculous."

"I wonder if the Regs were still in effect after the Reapers bombed the Alliance HQ." Allers agreed. "Besides, who would discharge the heroine in middle of the war?"

They looked at one another.

"I think we better keep this secret, unless the Commander mentions it," Traynor decided.

"Agreed. I really don't want to be on the Commander's bad side. If this woman dares to dig into Butterfly's history, it could end poorly."

"Who is she, exactly?"

"As far as I know, she is the Major's old friend. Her name's Rahna or something. But if you ask me, I think she is, or was close to him. Look at her face when she was talking about our illustrious Major."

They exchanged a glare.

"We definitely should keep this quiet."

* * *

Although James couldn't remember why he woke up half-naked and wearing woman's panties, he was sure he had a good time. At least, he didn't have a hangover and also had won more credits.

He was in chatting mood. After Cortez turned down his conversation, the lieutenant went to the bridge.

"Hey, dancing boy," Joker called him when he was in sight. "I'd heard you got yourself a new outfit."

"So, you know something." That wasn't the question. He had a feeling the flight lieutenant had a sinister plan.

"The Normandy is a small ship, man. Besides, everyone saw what you have beneath that tight outfit of yours when you took it off and danced like a... Jack would say a rabbit in heat."

"I don't mind... Wait, does everyone mean include Butterfly?"

Joker wondered why the big guy was concerned about it, but EDI interfered. "Not exactly. Commander Shepard took her elsewhere before you took off your shirt."

Still, it didn't make James feel better. However, before he could say anything, the airlock opened.

Butterfly ran past the bridge to the elevator followed by the Commander who looked like she ate something sour.

"Butterfly, wait!" The Major called out, but the girl disappeared into the elevator. Its door closed and left Shepard stuck in the CIC.

Something bad happened. The two lieutenants exchanged a stare in awkward silence. The rest of the crew still hadn't returned to their duties, so the CIC was empty.

"Just give her some time," Kaidan tried to soothe his girlfriend.

"But I... Why does this keep happen to me?" Shepard almost cried. "She is two year old, Kai. It's too soon for to rebel, isn't it?"

"Electra complex, perhaps," Joker murmured.

Still not noticing the audience, the Major held her. "I don't know anymore, Amala. Everything about our girl is not normal. At this point, I believe everything is possible."

"Sorry to interrupt, Major Alenko," Carefully, EDI informed him. "You've got a message from Admiral Anderson."

"Sounds important," Shepard suggested. "Take it. Worry about me later."

Kaidan squeezed her hand one last time before using a message terminal. As he read the message, his face twisted in an unreadable expression. He looked like he was going to faint.

"Kai, what happened?" Shepard asked worryingly.

"It's my dad."

Something caught in her throat. How selfish was she? All this time, she kept thinking about her own problems and had forgotten that Kaidan's parents were on Earth.

"I- I remember you said they made it to the orchard. Has anything...?"

"Dad helped mom hide there. Since the Reapers focused on attacking the major cities, the orchard probably is a safer place. After that, he returned to help with the resistance." His voice was husky with emotion. "Three days ago, he had been missing during a mission. They presumed he was MIA but..."

"I hope they found him."

"Yes, they did." Suddenly, the Major laughed. "They found him, safe and sound. I can't believe this."

She understood he was happy, but the way he laughed was somehow creepy. "Kai?"

Mindful of the audience, he didn't want to discuss it right there. "Why don't we talk in your cabin? I have something important to share."

"Oh, yeah. I think you're right. EDI, where's Butterfly now?"

"She's in the starboard observation. I think she is... building thing what humans call: a blanket fort. It appears she is moving out of your cabin, Shepard."

"She's building a fort?" The mother wasn't surprised, though. "That's very childish."

"Despite her height and curves, Butterfly is still a baby, Amala. We can't forget that." The biotic daddy chuckled.

"I won't. But...We should give her a break. EDI, can you send us the elevator?"

It took a few minutes before the couple left the CIC. The pilot and the soldier looked at each other, confused and also worried.

"Vega, do you understand what just happened?" Joker asked.

"I'm not sure. Perhaps the little princess is having an issue with her mommy. It's a part of growing up." James wasn't sure, however. He hated his father because the guy was a jackass, not for any other reason.

Butterfly was a lot luckier than him. Why would she fight with people who loved her the most? He couldn't understand.

"Not everyone is appreciative of what they already have, Lieutenant." EDI gave him a piece of her synthetic mind.

"I think you're right. But well, what would you guys say if I suggest for you to keep that family drama quiet? Admiral Hackett won't be happy if he knew about it. He might think it could possibly affect the mission."

"Agreed. That's their business. We shouldn't interfere."

EDI frowned at the pilot beside her. "Who are you and what have you done to Jeff? He would never say anything like that."

James chuckled as Joker rolled his eyes. "Oh, mom! I'm not that nosy, am I?"

"You aren't nosy, Joker. You just happen to know everything that goes on in the Normandy."

"Don't you have other things to do, James?" Joker snarled.

"No need to be pushy, Cripple. I'll go." James knew the pilot hated that nickname, but he couldn't help it.

"I'll get you someday, Vega." It was a weak threat, Joker knew. But he would find a way.

"I'll be waiting." The bigger guy left the cockpit, laughing.

* * *

_Butterfly had good taste in decorating_ Chakwas gave her that.

The fort wasn't simply a pile of things, but was well built with blankets and strings to secure them in place. It looked comfy.

She chuckled as she saw a sign: _no trespassing._

Through the material, she saw a blue light illuminating from the fort. Butterfly was probably playing with her biotics. Once or twice, the girl created a blue biotic ball to center herself. Chakwas thought that make her look like a magician.

"Butterfly," The doctor called.

The blue light ceased. The girl lifted a hem of the tent to look at the older woman. "Grandma, how are you?"

"I'm fine. Thank you for asking." Chakwas chuckled. "How about you, sweetheart? You have been here for six hours. Aren't you hungry? Pure biotic like you shouldn't skip your meals."

"I have some protein bars I grabbed from kitchen."

She also grabbed her things from Shepard's cabin before settling down in the starboard observation.

"But you forgot your friend's food." She gave the girl a bag of hamster food.

Among other things she took from the captain's cabin was the space hamster. Butterfly didn't want to be alone.

"Mr. K will be grateful, grandma," Butterfly smiled shyly. "I was in a hurry."

"Mr. K? That's quite a name. Is he settling down well? You also forgot his cage and his other necessities."

"He is adaptable. Soon, he will get used to his new home and new name." She looked very serious. Chakwas couldn't help but worry.

As a godmother, she had every right to worry. "Sweetheart, you know I love you right?"

The girl just stared at her, probably wondering where that came from.

"Sometimes, people fight with their mothers. And despite how much they love each other, they just can't see eye to eye. What I mean to say is... You can talk to me anytime. I won't tell your mom anything, I promise."

For a good long while, the girl just stared at her as if she was considering Chakwas' words. Although she was young, Butterfly almost never said anything without thinking.

"Have you ever faced doubt?"

Chakwas didn't know much about children, but she thought that question didn't sound childlike. "Um, you have to be more specific, dear. Women in my age have seen many things. It's supposed to give us wisdom but also give us more questions."

"Well, I mean... yourself. Mommy thinks I lost my mind, and I don't think I can blame her. Sometimes, I doubt myself as well."

"Oh dear, don't think like that! Your parents love you. They would never think ill of you. And if you want to know, I would never think that you're... losing your mind."

Butterfly smiled bitterly. She still kept a space between her and Chakwas. "I know, grandma. And I love you too. I want to prove I'm not mad."

"What're you going to do?" The doctor hoped her godchild didn't plan anything drastic.

"I'm going to contact an old friend. In the meantime, I need to be alone. So, I settled here at least until it's done."

"EDI can help, I think."

But the girl shook her head. "Aunt EDI is busy. And I can do it myself. Um, well, since you're going to talk with mommy, can you tell her that the quarians are starting a war with the geth. They're well prepared but the Reapers have interfered. If we don't stop this war soon, the entire race might have been wiped out."

_"But I don't know... Tali would contact me if she needed help."_ Via intercom, Shepard's voice rang. It seemed she overheard the entire conversation but the news caught her off guard and her tongue slipped.

"Commander!" Chakwas slapped her forehead.

_"Oops, sorry!"_

_"Step away from my console, mommy." _They heard Joker chase his CO before the voice was gone.

Butterfly chuckled, though. "Good thing mommy isn't a spy. She would do a horrible job trying to deceive people."

"I heard she did just fine when she assisted Kasumi in stealing the grey box." Chuckling, the doc protested for her friend's dignity. "She loves you so much, sweetheart. And love makes people do strange things."

Her smile was unreadable. "I know."

Suddenly, the atmosphere was heavy with awkwardness. Chakwas felt like someone silently commanded her to leave.

"I'll leave some food in the freezer. If you're hungry just warm it up. Protein bars aren't proper food."

"No argument here, doc." Butterfly tried to make a joke although it felt flat.

Chakwas patted her head lovingly before she left. After that, there wasn't any noise but hamster squeaks and very light breathing.

* * *

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta :D


	39. Communication

"People fail to get along because they fear each other; they fear each other because they don't know each other; they don't know each other because they have not communicated with each other."

_- Martin Luther King Jr._

* * *

**Communication**

* * *

Sometimes, Shepard wondered how she was still sane when everything around her went to hell.

With both hands on her temples, she slumped on her worktable. Sudden but gentle, a pair of strong hands touched her shoulders and began to give her a massage.

She had almost forgotten the feel of those magic hands. Shepard mewled in pleasure as those hands kneaded though her tight muscles. "Um, Kai,"

"Better?" The soft baritone voice gently rang upon her ears. She was going to melt.

She just hummed her approval. The major chuckled softly as she leaned on him, eyes closed. He knew she was tired, but duty kept her awake.

"Let's go to bed." Ignoring her protest, Kaidan lifted his girlfriend up bridal style. In a few long strides, he placed her on the bed and took her hoodie off.

Tiling her brow, Shepard bit her lip and smiled coyly.

"Not that I'm complaining," He chuckled. "But I want to give you a massage. Take your tank top off and lay on your stomach."

"Aye, aye sir." She mocked before following his order. All the time, she kept her eyes on him and smirked as her boyfriend swallowed hard.

"How am I supposed to work after I know you are walking around the ship without a bra?"

"With your self-control, I think," Shepard winked.

"You're killing me." He groaned but didn't let his discipline slip. "Lay down on your stomach. I'll make your shoulders feel better."

"Should my pants come off too?" When Kaidan shot her a stern glare, she added. "I'm sore everywhere."

He couldn't help but laugh. "Amala, you're a bad, bad girl."

"Am I?" She said with mock innocence. "It has been too long since the last time we were actually alone together."

"Yeah, we hardly have time. There're so many things to take care of. Most of the time we're too busy, or too exhausted to do anything."

"God, don't remind me," She almost collapsed on the bed. "At least, don't remind me until this headache gone."

"Why don't we try an old trick?" Kaidan gently rolled her until her face was on the pillow. "You tell me your problem, and I'll give you my opinion. Perhaps I can give you a new perspective."

Back on the Normandy SR1, aside from flirting, she asked for his advice. That habit was forgotten when she was on the suicide mission without him.

"Now that you mention it, I think it might work. Um, but where to start? What about Butterfly?"

"She isn't angry anymore. That's progress."

"I hoped for better. But since we know how stubborn she is, I think that's enough for now." Kaidan kneaded her shoulder blades, gently unknotting the stiff muscles. She couldn't help but purr.

"Next topic... Would you mind if I ask about the Crucible? I talked with Liara. She said we need more than the device."

"Yeah, Hackett mentioned it too. The scientists aren't sure what it is. But it's probably something that controls the Crucible to fire at the Reapers, not us. For now, they call it: the Catalyst."

"Do we have to find what it is?"

"God, I hope not. I know you have faith in me, Kai. But I'm not that smart. Let someone smarter do it," Shepard groaned.

"Well, that means we don't have to worry about it, right? Not now at least." His hands traveled down along her spine. Calloused texture did a very alluring thing to her soft skin. When she let out another mewl, he couldn't stop himself from nipping the back of her throat.

_Hell, yeah! This is heaven._ "You just spared me from another headache. I love you."

A low and husky chuckle was near her ear. "Anytime, baby. Is there anything else I can help you with?"

It was hard to think when your boyfriend was kissing your sweet spot. Shepard was giggling like a teenage girl. "Kai, that's... If you don't stop doing that, I swear I'll ravish you!"

"That's hardly a threat, baby. It sounds like a promise." Kaidan started licking her skin, leaving a hot trail along her spine.

"Kaidan!" She warned, but it sounded breathless.

"Don't Kaidan me. This is business."

Shepard was dumbstruck for a while before laughing out loud. "I can't believe you used that line in bed."

He loved that sound, not as much as he loved when she screamed his name when he drove her over the edge but this was a good sight. If they could live for a thousand years, he would never bored to hear it every day.

They laughed together until Shepard felt better. She rolled to lie on her back and then pulled him closer. "I love you."

He loved to hear this sentence too. "I love you too, Amala, until the end of time."

Only mere millimeters between their lips, but a ping interrupted them. The couple jumped. Kaidan threw her a shirt as Shepard checked her private terminal.

"What is it?" The Major asked. He returned to his professional officer mode instantly.

"Remember what B said hours ago, about the quarians?" Still reading the e-mail, she asked him.

"How could I forget? I tried to ask her how could she know about my dad or the quarians, but she said we would know when the time was right."

If Kaidan couldn't get an answer, no one would.

"I asked Hackett if he knew anything. But he only knew they were up to something. There has been strange activity coming from the quarians. Look, Liara sent me a report about the Flotilla." She tapped the screen. "Most of the young pilgrims have been called back to the Flotilla. One of them brought a lot of tech and weapons back."

"Butterfly said they were well prepared," Kaidan swallowed hard.

"But if the Reapers interfere, it can't be good, Kai."

Although the quarians had the largest fleet in galaxy, they still didn't have a chance against both geth and the Reapers.

"I can't believe they started another war while the Reapers are about to wipe us out." Now, they both sighed in frustration. "Did you contact Tali? She should have known something since she is one of their admirals."

"She is... You spoke to Garrus, didn't you?"

Like a protective big brother, the turian was mad for what he had done on Horizon. They tried to get over it for Butterfly's sake.

"Our daughter is very diplomatic, Commander. She persuaded us to talk. I think she might able to talk the geth and the quarian to make peace, if we let her."

"They have to stop shooting first. And that's our mission." The headache came back. Shepard held her head as she opened another message.

"Wait, that's Thane," The Major exclaimed. "He said he found this holo in his Tool. So he sent it to us."

The message came with an attachment, a picture. Shepard opened it and they both laughed.

It was a picture of Marian White and a small infant. Butterfly was so tiny in her surrogate mother's arms. Her short hair was wild and fluffy. She was yawning as Marian smiled to the camera shyly. Her eyes were still dark from an injury.

Oh god, she couldn't believe she could be jealous of a dead woman. Shepard really wanted to run her fingers along that hair, to hold and feed her daughter with the milk from her breasts.

As always, Kaidan knew when she felt bad. He wrapped his arms around her waist from behind. "It's not your fault, Amala. This and what that happened on that ship."

They had a short conversation about Butterfly's scar. Kaidan wasn't sure if he would ever look at his daughter without feeling guilty. He was her father, but he couldn't protect her.

Shepard held him back. "I know. But it's still hard to accept it. And I still don't know how those bastards knew she was mine."

"It's in Project Caterpillar. That crazy woman mentioned Cerberus gave the information so those four-eyed terrorists would find her for them. The Illusive Man is a son of the bitch."

"The file? Heck, I never had enough time to read it! Anything else I should know?"

"Well, the ship belonged to the church of light. Most of the passengers were pilgrims. Ms. White got a ticket because she joined the religion."

"Wait! Are you saying she was... a nun?"

"She married god. But her mother was ill and needed expensive medical treatment. I'm rather sure she was desperate when Cerberus offered her the job. The poor old woman passed away just after Marian ran from the lab."

When it came to Cerberus, Shepard wondered if they just stumbled on the desperate nun. They probably already had their eyes on her and then took advantage. The innocent nun was a perfect addition to their plans. She was clean, defenseless, and probably easy to manipulate.

"Speaking of which, did the file say anything about the other women? Rachel and Liz, if I remember correctly."

"Rachel is... was an ex-Cerberus operative. And Liz was... a prostitute from Omega."

Shepard gasped. "That... Oh, I thought I knew how Cerberus got Dino and Persis. Rachel gave the girl to them because of her loyalty and Liz just..."

"She sold Dino for money, and her own safety. The Illusive Man promised her, she wouldn't have to run anymore, and he did just so."

"That doesn't sound like him," She wondered.

Kaidan knew even though the woman gave up the baby, he still felt some pity towards her. "She didn't have to run, because his man killed her after Dino was born."

"Perhaps I should feel bad, but that bitch deserved it." After all, Liz betrayed Dino and Dr. Arum.

"But I'm not sure we can blame her. She probably needed the money. Besides, running from Cerberus isn't easy."

Shepard frowned, hands on her hips. "When you put it like that, I sound like a terrible person."

"Even if you're a cruel old woman, I'll always love you, Amala."

Her Major always knew what to say. How could she stay mad at him? "Do you really mean it?"

"You still have to ask? I think it's very much obvious."

"I mean..." Suddenly hesitate; she licked her lip as she pondered her next words. "Do you really want to... grow old with me if... after this war is over?"

"I still have that ring, you know?" He teased.

Shepard smiled. "I take that means 'yes'."

"Until the end of time," and then he kissed her again with more passion. Their clothes slipped away and neither of them wanted to think about anything else.

* * *

Although he wasn't a biotic, James still ate more than other men. Besides from doing a lot of exercise, food in the right amount kept him in shape. Sometimes in the middle of night cycle, he raided the kitchen for a midnight snack.

Mostly he was alone, but tonight was different.

As soon as the elevator opened, he smelled something spicy and warm. The scent was enough to make his stomach growl. He hoped whoever was cooking that meal was kind enough to share.

James walked straight to the kitchen only to stop in his tracks. Although the chef was turning her back to him, he could tell it was Butterfly. No one else in the Normandy had long and silky hair like that. Besides, the space hamster was with her.

On the top shelf was a bottle of pepper. Butterfly tried to grab it but she was too short. Not thinking, the lieutenant stepped in and grabbed it for her. They were standing too close. He could feel her biotics radiate through his clothes and..._ Hell, she smells even more delicious than that meal._

_That is an inappropriate thought,_ James mentally kicked himself._ Try anything funny and you'll be hunted by three enraged biotics, a sharpshooter, and two krogan warlords... if Butterfly doesn't kill you first._

Abruptly, Butterfly shoved him off her. His protest died in his throat as he saw her eyes. They were shivering in fear.

_Loco, you should have known better!_ He really wanted to kick himself.

After what she went through, she didn't like it when anyone sneaked up on her. It was good enough she hadn't crushed him with her biotics.

"I'm sorry," He blurted. "I just wanted to help."

Her biotics flared, but she calmed down before it hurt anyone. "Please, don't sneak up on me like that again. I can't control my Annihilation Field sometimes."

"Annihilation Field? I've never heard of it."

"It'd burn nearby creatures and is deadly if that person is unshielded. If I did it right, I could blast it to detonate a biotic explosion." Still talking, she turned away from him to cook something in the pot.

"Since the name is so lovely, it must be something like that." He said.

Butterfly chuckled.

James tried to think of some witty response. But it died as the bottle in his hand floated to Butterfly's. That's creepy.

He didn't realize he said it until he heard the reply.

"That's useful."

"No disagreement here." One of the secrets to living a long life is to not argue with a woman whose holding a knife.

If his eyes didn't deceive him, he thought Butterfly was smiling. This was the first time he noticed her dimples.

His heart skipped a beat.

On the counter, Mr. K squeaked. Butterfly giggled and raised the stove's temperature. "I'm almost finished."

James' mind ran to somewhere dirty. He looked away to keep his head clear but noticed her legs were bare. If she wore anything beneath her oversized shirt (probably her dad's shirt), it was too short._ Wait, weren't Liara and Lola complaining that Butterfly didn't like wearing bras?_

_What are you? A teenager?_ He chided himself._ Don't be so excited over a half-naked woman._

Butterfly ladled the soup and tasted it. She hummed in appreciation and James almost banged his head against the wall.

"Don't make that noise with that voice of yours, woman!" He barked.

"Huh, what?" Blinking, the girl didn't understand him.

_She is innocent, you idiota!_ James mentally chided himself. "It's nothing... What are you cooking?"

"Spicy pork rib soup with potato," She added potatoes and carrots into the pot. "Grandma cooked me spaghetti, but I'm not full yet. It isn't as good as real pork but I can endure. Want some?"

"Sounds delicious. But where did you learn how to cook?"

"Just following the cooking manual," She shrugged. "Mary used to work in kitchens. She always kept me in her sight, so I saw how she cooked. I'm not a good chef but I know a thing or two."

The soup began to bubble. Butterfly stirred it a few times before covering the pot. Judging from the way she moved, James thought she knew what she was doing.

"You are a better chef than Lola," He smiled.

To his surprise, Butterfly laughed. "That's hardly a compliment. Everyone can cook better than mommy."

"Everyone can dance better than her, too." When the girl tilted her head towards him, he added. "I mean really dance. I never saw her on the dance floor, but people talk about it."

"I've heard that too."

Did he detect a story? The man sat on the stool, waiting for Butterfly to continue.

She stared at him as if she was considering something. After a sigh, she said, "Mommy is famous, although she doesn't like it. People talk about her even when they thought she was dead. It wasn't always a good thing, though."

Once, James fought with a few thugs to protect Shepard's reputation. He knew what she meant. "People always talk."

"Yep," she kept cooking. James wasn't sure if she just tried to avoid his eyes. "I still remember the day Mary pointed at the Alliance recruit poster and said that's your mommy. After that, I'd listen when anyone talked about Commander Shepard."

Something caught in his throat. A girl who had learned about her mother from other people's mouths... She must have felt lonely.

"When the Bahak system was destroyed, they called her a mass murderer. They wanted her blood."

"But Lola was in the Alliance's custody," James added.

She nodded.

_So they wanted blood of Commander's kin instead._ The lieutenant swallowed hard.

He sat in silence as she was cooking. It didn't take long before the soup ready. James gave his thanks when Butterfly gave him a bowl of soup.

After the first taste, he hummed in appreciation. "It's good. Are you sure this is your first time cooking? You're even better than me."

Her cheeks were bright pink. Butterfly smiled and looked even more gorgeous when she blushed. "You must be kidding me. I just followed the manual."

"I'm many things, Princess. But I'm not a liar. This is really good." However, his attitude had changed when he saw her bowl. It was almost empty, save for a few pieces of potatoes and tomatoes. "You gave most of it to me?"

"I'm not... that hungry." Obviously, Butterfly wasn't a good liar. As she said that, she avoided his eyes and played with her spoon.

Sighing, the lieutenant knew he had to say something. "I didn't like you, you know?"

"I think that's quite obvious." She kept stirring the soup.

"Yeah, it was very obvious, but... that's not my point. What I want to say is... I didn't know why I felt like that. But I think I do now."

Butterfly tilted her head and looked at him. Her beautiful brown eyes almost got him right there. It took a lot of will power to continue.

"For a baby, you're damn selfless. You put everyone before yourself and ignore your own needs. You give more than you have. It isn't a bad thing but... I don't know. Perhaps you remind me too much of my old commander. He was a damn good soldier who was ready to die protecting people. And he did."

The look in her face was nothing like a baby. She seemed hurt and mature. "I can't change the way I am. It's my destiny."

"I don't want you to change. It's... I don't know why I said that," James slapped his forehead. "Idiota, I just can't keep my mouth shut."

"What if we just eat?"

"That's... a good idea." Awkwardly, he laughed.

They ate in easy silence.

* * *

Some fluffiness before Rannoch.

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta :D


	40. Breaking down

"Never tell the truth to people who are not worthy of it."

_- Mark Twain_

* * *

**Breaking Down**

* * *

They said the quarians had the largest fleet in the galaxy. It was almost true except some of their ships were not battleships. Much of the quarian fleet consisted of civilian ships.

And now, the only thing the people on those ships could do was pray.

The beam from the geth dreadnought cut through the quarians in half. So many ships exploded and took so many lives with them. The quarians could only drill a small hole on the gigantic ship.

This was a massacre, not war.

"The Reapers are threatening to destroy the galaxy and everything we know, but you just start another war!" Shepard grunted furiously.

Tali was worried. They talked as Shepard was suiting up for the next mission. The quarian sensed unordinary rage from her friend. They used to argue over the conflict between her people and the synthetics but this was different.

She just hoped the rage wasn't directed exclusively to her.

"It was not my idea, Shepard. And I agreed with you. This is idiotic. I tried to talk them out of this but..." She swallowed hard at the thought of her people wiped out by the geth fleet. If they didn't stop this war soon, the entire race of quarians might become extinct.

After she met Legion, she hoped they might found a way for the two races to cooperate. All they needed was time.

Her people were exiled for too long. They wanted their homeworld back at any cost. But no one ever thought the cost could be the extinction of their entire race.

Tali's sorrow cooled the Commander down.

_My biggest problem right now is my daughter doesn't talk to me. It's nothing compared to the quarians fate. Perhaps I should stop mopping._

"I know you would never agree with all this. It was just... I'm having a problem too." The older woman finally said. "But we don't have time for a chat. Can you brief me our plan again while I'm suiting up, Tali?"

"Alright," the quarian brought her omni-tool up to show her a holo of the war.

The Migrant Fleet outnumbered the geth but it didn't give them an advantage. One geth dreadnought alone was too powerful. The quarian's fleet was under heavy attack. Every minute the war continued meant more death.

They needed to hurry. Since Tali came aboard a few hours ago, she was busy and hadn't had chance to say hello to Garrus or meet Butterfly.

"The geth fleet is under control of one signal." She zoomed the holo to the geth dreadnought. "This is where the signal came from. We have to break in and shut it down."

Everything is easier said than done. Although the Normandy could sneak through the active battlefield and dock near the dreadnought, they couldn't simply walk in. Shepard felt every single hair on her body standing up in fright as she thought about walking through the giant worm docking tube to another ship.

It wasn't easy to forget how she died... in space.

She tried to calm down, telling herself everything would be fine.

Shepard was lost in her thoughts. She didn't notice the handsome Major came to see them off or the nerd talk he shared with the quarian.

"Shepard..." Kaidan called her. The man always knew when she was upset. "Are you alright?"

She wanted to say she was fine, but that would be a lie and Kaidan would know. Sighing, she asked. "How is Butterfly doing?"

Suddenly realizing she was a third wheel here, Tali hurriedly said, "I will wait by the airlock. Just... don't be long."

The couple nodded. However, they didn't look at her. Kaidan held and cupped Shepard's face with his hand as if he wanted to banish her concern away.

Four days, it was damn four days since they had left Tuchanka and Butterfly still hadn't said a word to her mother. The girl was living in the fort she had built from blankets since that day. She would leave her cave only when she was hungry and for training. Only one was allowed in her place and that was the space hamster.

She was stubborn, strong, and a bit crazy. If Butterfly wasn't such a sweetheart, he'd be sure they created a monster.

Still, he sighed as his thoughts wandered to the other clone. Persis and Butterfly had the same DNA. The twins probably had equal capabilities. It was sad to think the girl was with Cerberus.

If he was able, he wanted to rescue her. But it was nearly impossible. Cerberus wouldn't let her out of their grip easily.

"I should go." Shepard cut his train of thought. "I still have lives to save."

"Wait," Kaidan still worried. He knew her nightmare. Walking out there might trigger her PTSD. "Are you sure you're up for this? I can go if you..."

"I can do it." It would kill her watching him walk out there too. Still, she tried to reassure her boyfriend. "You stay here take care of our child and our ship, ok? Don't worry. I've got EDI and Tali with me."

There was no use arguing with the Commander Shepard. Major Alenko just kissed her. "Be careful."

"And remember I love you."

But Shepard smacked him. "Stop that, Major."

"Come back safely and I'll let you punish me."

"Oh, I'll hold you to that... after I come back." She promised.

They held hands before Shepard walked into the docking tube.

* * *

Over her head were metal debris, stars, and the inky canvas of endless space.

At zero gravity, things were unmoving. Detached parts of the Normandy SR1 flew away so slow. Shepard felt trapped in the eternal night.

Magnetic boots kept her on the floor. But she still feared she might fly away. It took everything she had to keep moving to the cockpit. She still had to save Joker.

Take the man and leave with the escape pod. _You can do it._ She told herself.

Slowly and carefully, Shepard made her way forward. In the back of her mind she sensed someone was calling her name, but she didn't dare look back.

"Mommy," the voice was louder. "Pull yourself together."

_What?_

She blinked and suddenly realized she was sitting within the docking tube, hands around her knees. Although her brain commanded her to move, her subconscious didn't listen.

In her comm link, Kaidan called her name over and over. He was worried but she just couldn't move.

Everybody fears something. Commander Shepard wasn't the exception.

"Kai..." She cried. "I-I can't move. There's a large gap... space... can't make it."

At the other end of the tube, the Major was leaning on the airlock. He wanted to go out there to get his girlfriend back. Behind him, Tali and EDI were watching in concern.

_She is out there, alone._ Kaidan punched the door in rage. _Damn, why did I let her go?_

"Kaidan..." Tali warned. "We have to do something."

Yes, she was right. He tried to think of another plan. "Amala, listen to me. You have to calm down. Take a deep breath, baby."

His voice always did the trick. Shepard felt calm already. "Ok... I can move now."

"Can you go further? There is another tube. If this one is too damaged, we'll use another one. Just... come back."

She stood up but before she could move further one of the geth fighters was sent to her direction. The explosion sent a large part of the ship toward the tube. A crash caused the already worn tube to depart. Shepard looked in horror as the Normandy and the other end of the docking tube flew away.

There was no way back.

Her comm lost the signal. She knew Kaidan would try to reconnect it but that required some time. She was alone for now and had only two options; go forward or die.

_Move your ass, Amala._ She ordered herself. _Your boyfriend and daughter are waiting for you to come back. Move your ass to that door, now!_

She tried to walk up to the panel that connected the tube together. In zero-G, she didn't have to worry about direction as long as her magnetic boots were still working properly. But the scene she saw through the gap reminded her of her death. She couldn't take it.

But she had to try. Otherwise, she might be spaced again.

But fuck... as she was about to climb, the surface over her head fell off from the rest of the tube. She had to jump although she was sure she would never make it to the other side. She would...

She closed her eyes, braved herself for the worst.

A hand grabbed hers and then pulled her to a steadier surface. Shepard tried to look for her savior but found no one.

But she still felt the touch. It was just like the morning she woke up from the strange dream. Something was odd, but she couldn't wrap her head around it.

"Amala!" Her comm link active again. The worried Major almost yelled. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. A little shaken but still alive." And she was very glad to stay that way. "What about the Normandy? Is everyone alright?"

"Everyone's fine. Don't worry about us." He chided.

"Sorry, I just... When I get back, we need to talk."

Even with the helmet, Kaidan could tell Tali was blinking. "Is this what she calls one of these days?"

"No, it's not a code. But yes, I'll be making mad love with him when I go back." Shepard laughed. When the danger passed, she didn't feel fear anymore. Laughing means living.

"I appreciate the thought, Commander." His voice was half-joking. "But we're on a mission. Can you move now?"

Shepard tested her limbs. Her body seemed to be fully functioning, no longer stiff. "I do. Tell Tali and EDI to be prepared. I'll go inside and try to open another tube so they can use it."

"Aye, aye, ma'am." Kaidan smiled in relief.

* * *

Robot arms worked in harmony. Each of their movement created more artificial muscles. Not long, they finished making a synthetic arm and then another robot attached it to the patient.

Testing the artificial fingers, Leng stared at his new arm in rage. He still couldn't believe a baby had defeated him. That bitch was inexperienced. How could she beat a professional like him?

"_This is for Mary, you monster."_ Her whisper still echoed in his head.

_Marian White_... The assassin involuntary sighed. When he got his assignment, he thought she was only a name in the list, but the woman proved she was more than that.

That day, he traced her to the lower ward and found her in the alley. To his surprise, she knew he was there but she still faced him without a weapon.

But no, she didn't want to die. After years of killing, he knew how to tell a desperate soul. He knew Marian wasn't desperate. Even with his blade at her throat, Marian White didn't flinch. She stared into his eyes with intense emotion that almost scared him.

"Why are you doing this?" She asked. Her voice calm.

"Nothing personal. It's just a job." Killing a helpless woman was as easy as crushing a bug. He knew he should just cut her down and leave, but why was he talking?

Green eyes narrowed, as if she was disappointed. "You've killed so many. Your path is soaked with blood and death. But have you ever accomplished anything?"

"Look, woman. I know you're trying to distract me, but this trick won't work. You aren't the first who tried to preach the mercy out of me." You couldn't forget your first. He still remembered that guy... his first kill.

"Kill me, then." Her eyes still focused on him. "But know that I'll pray for your soul."

No one had ever said that. Everyone thought of him as a heartless monster. Why did she...?

_She is just distracting you._ He told himself. _Don't listen to this bitch. Just kill her already!_

The assassin pushed her against the wall. His left arm locked her neck as his right was holding a standard-issue service blade. He'd killed a krogan with this blade before.

"Keep your prayer to yourself." But why did his voice crack? "No word can untaint my heart. Hell, I don't even have a heart."

He didn't understand why he felt this way.

"I can see clearly. Your heart is crying."

"What the hell are you talking about?" He felt torn. One part of him wanted to stab her, but another side of him wanted to cry on her chest.

And then, he remembered the warning The Illusive Man gave him.

'_Be careful, Leng. That woman isn't helpless. No helpless woman can run from us this long.'_

The blade pushed through her chest, cutting right at her heart. Marian gasped one last time. She hadn't had the chance to say any last words.

The doctor who augmented him said his new eyes wouldn't be able to shed tears. But why did he feel a warm liquid on his cheeks?

"Enjoying your new parts?" A sultry voice brought him back to reality.

Kai Leng huffed in disgust. They used to share passionate nights but that was history. Neither of them could stand each other now.

Too bad, Arachne was the best they had since the whole science team escaped. Although The Illusive Man didn't trust her, he couldn't dispose of her. He kept the woman close so he could watch her every move.

_Keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer._

"Looking good," As always, Arachne never waited for his response. She read his condition from the scanner. "We're going to attach your new legs. But this progress is going to be hurt. I will give you a sedative."

"Will I ever get up after that?" Never trust another murderer, his teacher said.

Arachne paused briefly before smiling. "Of course, Mr. Leng. Who would ever put the best Cerberus assassin to sleep? Your grave is in the battlefield, not my surgery bed."

"Your concern is touching." He mocked. However, he almost jumped as another woman walked in.

"Easy, that's Persis." The scientist chuckled. "Still thinking about your loss, I see."

"It might be better if you let me screw this one." His cybernetic eyes stared at Butterfly's clone. "They're twins. I can pretend that I'm screwing that bitch..."

A shockwave ran through his artificial vein. The assassin yelled as Arachne yanked a shocking tool off him. "Say anything like that again and you'll lose your precious body part."

"Seriously, Arachne? You protect this... Shepard's child? Ouch!" She shocked him again.

"She is mine."

"No, she is The Illusive Man's." This time, Kai Leng shocked her.

Persis looked at their fighting with blank eyes. She didn't move an inch even though the assassin shocked Arachne. Still, that didn't mean she didn't feel anything.

The woman wiped crimson blood off the corner of her mouth. Her eyes shone with rage. "You're such a loyal dog, hah? Let's see what your faithfulness brings you." She pointed at his body.

"It's none of your business."

Arachne snarled. "Alright, I won't interfere with your business. As long as you don't interfere with me, or my girl."

Knowingly, the assassin smirked. "Is it true you can't conceive? Don't tell me you want to claim Shepard's child as your own."

"Who told you?" But she knew the answer. "The Illusive Man, didn't he? He always thinks he knows everything."

"And I know you. We both are murderers by choice and enjoy it. Being a parent isn't your thing, Arachne." Somehow, that sounded like a warning.

The scientist stared at him and then left without a word.

* * *

I never read Mass Effect: Retribution. So I don't know much about this assassin. Still, I think Kai Leng in ME3 is too plain. He was just an evil villain who was going to be killed by Shepard. Don't get me wrong. I hated him. But I think he can be more.

I think I messed up the timeline in game. Mostly it's because I haven't played ME3 for months. Believe me, I tried. But I just can't. After my first playthrough, I suddenly stopped playing after Rannoch. I still play MP mode, however.

And Thank The Lonely Traveler for the beta. Awesome job as always. :D


	41. Pinocchio

"Little puppet made of pine, awake. The gift of life is thine."

_- The Blue Fairy, Disney's Pinocchio._

* * *

**Pinocchio**

* * *

Rage was an understatement. Kaidan still couldn't believe Admiral Han'Gerrel took advantage when the geth signal shut down to attack the geth dreadnought even though, Shepard and her team were still inside. If anything had happened to his girlfriend, he wouldn't have been responsible for his actions.

There was no need to say that Butterfly might tear them apart if they had killed her mom.

Fortunately for all of them Shepard escaped the dreadnought. Via the comm, she said she took one of the geth fighters. He went to the shuttle bay.

After all those months of killing geths, it was unnerving to see a geth fighter land on the Normandy. As soon as they landed and the passengers inside walked out, Kaidan jumped and his biotics flared as he saw a geth infiltrator with Shepard's squad.

"At ease, Major. This one is with us." The Commander stopped him. "The Reapers captured it and forced it to transmit the signal to the geth. When we rescued it, the signal was terminated."

Kaidan didn't know what to say. But the geth looked at it, and its eyebrows? tilted in curiosity. "Shepard-Commander's mate?"

"Yes, I am. But how did you know?" The Major surmised this geth was different from the others. Well, he had never met an active geth up close and personal like this anyway.

"We saw your picture. Shepard-Commander named her hamster after you. We searched the extranet for information on you."

Kaidan looked at his girlfriend.

"Legion is a unique geth. It helped me take down the Collectors." Shepard explained. "We used to... talk about a lot of things."

"But... Well, we will talk about the hamster later. We still have the quarian admirals on board. Seriously Shepard, they fired the dreadnought when you were still inside. Had any of you gotten hurt, I'd..."

Shepard placed her hand on his. Her green eyes shone with love. "I'm here, and I'm fine. All of us are alright."

A ghost of a smile coated his face only for a few seconds. If he hadn't minded the audience, he'd kiss her. "Ok, I won't use my biotics on the admiral. But we still have to talk to them."

"Let me handle it." She wasn't a saint. But despite her anger, she had her duty. Admiral Han had to have good reasons for what he did or else she would kick him off of her ship.

The elevator opened. Everyone instantly looked at the newcomer.

And that took Butterfly aback. She was suddenly nervous as everyone stared at her. "Did I come at the wrong time?"

The space hamster that sat on her shoulder squeaked before he climbed down to hide in her pocket.

"He still remembers the last time you tried to pat him." Shepard chuckled.

"We did not know organic fur is able to feel electric shocks. There are a lot of thing we do not know about organics." However, the geth changed his interest to the girl. Its eye spun like it was refocusing several times. "Does Shepard-Commander have a copy?"

"She isn't my copy. Butterfly is my daughter." That question sounded very childlike in Shepard's opinion. She couldn't help but chuckle.

"And he is Pinocchio." Said the girl. She didn't fear the geth or even flinch when it leaned closer.

"Pinocchio?" Tali and Legion asked almost in the same time.

"It's a boy in a human's fairy tale." Kaidan explained. "Pinocchio was an ordinary wooden puppet until the blue fairy blessed him. He was animated but still had to prove himself 'brave, truthful, and unselfish' to become a real boy."

The quarian thought for a while. "I think I can see the resemblance."

That surprised everyone. Legion's eye refocused on Tali several times as if confused. However, it didn't say a thing, just looked back at Butterfly who was smiling playfully.

"Blue fairy."

The girl smiled wider and hugged it. "Thank you."

The parents looked at each other. At this point, they weren't surprised their daughter talked to the geth like old friends.

Kaidan tried to play along. "She is the blue fairy? That's a nice sentiment, Legion. And what about Shepard, does she have a nickname too?"

"Mommy is Geppetto." Butterfly didn't even notice her mom's reaction.

"Geppetto, huh? And what about me?"

She thought only for a few seconds. "You're Jiminy Cricket."

"I'm a cricket?" Kaidan laughed and gently pulled his daughter off the geth. "I really would love to hear all of it, but daddy and mommy have business to attend with the quarians and... Pinocchio. Can you stay with Chakwas, Princess?"

"Ok." There was no argument. Butterfly hugged Legion and her dad before she left.

After the elevator shut, Shepard shot her boyfriend a dagger glare. "What is that all about?"

"I didn't understand a thing. I just thought I ought to say something." He knew his daughter wasn't a normal, but couldn't fathom her real capability.

Shepard turned to the geth. "Legion, why do I have the feeling you're hiding something from us? Have you ever met Butterfly before?"

"Please specify." Its eyebrows moved widely. "Which question should we answer?"

"Both!" Shepard felt the geth was avoiding the subject and that made her angry. However, EDI interrupted them.

"The quarian admirals request your presence, Shepard."

Sighing, she felt the beginning of a headache. Although the signal was shut down, the war wasn't over yet.

"I'll be in the war room in ten minutes."

The crew left for their duties. Shepard tried to remove her armor but her back cried in pain.

"Are you ok, baby?" Kaidan helped her take her plate off.

"I'm fine. It's just... one of those explosions knocked me against the wall. It doesn't hurt that much, really. I bet it's just a bruise."

He groaned as he saw a dark bruise beneath her armor. He was a field medic, and knew this wasn't a simple bruise. "God, this is... You have to see Chakwas before the Admirals."

"But I..."

"Amala, please." He insisted. "You're not invincible. Don't push yourself too hard. And next time, you have to take me with you."

"But what about B?"

"She can take care of herself, and you know it. Butterfly passed every tests Garrus and I implemented. I don't have much more to teach her. All she needs is real mission experience."

"I don't know." Just thinking about Butterfly in the middle of a war zone made her heart ache. "I suggested Jack's students take support roles in the war because they weren't ready for a real fight yet. But I have to lead my daughter to the frontline. She is younger than those kids."

"Now you know how I feel when you go out there to fight without me." As he said this, Kaidan took her armor off and placed them on the table.

"Yeah, dad." She mocked.

Chuckling, Kaidan kissed her forehead. "We already talked, Amala."

"I know. It's just... We both are going to keep our eyes on her. And she must follow my orders like other marines, ok?"

"I don't think she'd have any problems with that. Our girl is more reasonable and capable than she looks. I bet The Illusive Man is regretting aging her."

Thinking about payback, Shepard smirked darkly. "He'll regret every cry, every pain he has caused us. I swear."

"We need to patch you up first." Their fingers intertwined. "Let's go see Chakwas. I can use the time to cool down anyway."

She just pecked his cheek. There was no need to say anything else.

* * *

After everything she had gone through, Shepard had learned one thing regardless their species, people are the same. Human, asari, turian, krogan, quarian, or even the geth, they were all troublesome.

The quarian was lucky she just punched Admiral Han in the gut instead of breaking his helmet and kicking them off her ship. Admiral Xen even dared to suggest 'analyzing Legion'.

How dare she? Did she believe that only because Earth needed their fleet they could ask anything of Shepard?

Since she was young, Amala Shepard grew up without knowing her family. So she relied on the next best thing, friendship. Although she didn't know if Legion felt the same, she counted it as one of her friends. And no one would experiment on her friend.

"That's out of the question, Admiral. You won't touch him!" The Commander declared.

Legion seemed like it wanted to say something but changed its mind.

"But this thing can give us a lot of information. It has been centuries since the geth drove us off Rannoch. New information could help us fight their new generation." Admiral Xen didn't give up so easily.

"You can ask it questions. I'm sure Legion will cooperate."

"Are you...? I'll take what I can get. It would be easier if we can connect it directly to their server." The woman grumbled.

"Admiral Koris sent a distress call, but the message is too damaged. I'm trying to clear it." Tali who was at a nearby console interrupted them.

"EDI, can you help us?"

It wasn't difficult for the AI to follow the order. In just a few seconds, the message was clear.

_: SOS. This is Admiral Zaal'Koris Vas Qwib-Qwib. Our ship was shot down. A group of civilians and I survived the crash but we're under attack. The geth army is shooting at us._

The Commander looked at Xen, but the quarian sighed. "I hope I can send our ships to rescue them. But our fleet is under attack by geth fighter squadrons. They're targeting our liveships. We have to protect them, so we can't spare our men."

"But the signal from the dreadnought is... Legion, is there another Reaper signal anywhere?" Shepard asked.

"Correct. There is a geth server on Rannoch. This server is taking control of the geth fighter squadrons." It paused briefly as if it was thinking. "It needs to be shut down."

Shepard stared at her synthetic friend. "Do you mean that server is going to shut itself down? That's odd, Legion."

"We can shut it down, remotely. Only thing we require is time."

"Can you do that? And how long would it take?" Still, Shepard thought it sounded too good to be true.

"An hour, at least."

_It's not going to be that easy. I should have known._"Ok. Then shut it down. I'll go down to rescue the quarians."

"Shepard!" Tali called. She sounded excited. "Did you say you're going to go to Rannoch?"

Tali had grown up a lot since they met, but she was still like a baby sister to Shepard. The Commander knew what she was going to ask. "Suit up, Tali. How could I go to your homeworld without you? I need a local guide."

For the quarians, the thought about home was heart-warming and also thrilling. They hadn't seen the planet for centuries_. Would it be like in the poems? Would it still be habitable?_

_Could a nomad settle down after never having a stable home?_

"I hope I can go with you." Admiral Xen sighed. "We all dream about the homeworld."

"We have our duties, Admiral." After what happened on Earth, Shepard thought she understood how the quarians felt. "And I'll try my best to end this war. Perhaps we could have a party under Rannoch's sky one day. Just don't give up."

"Shepard-Commander?" Legion couldn't help but wonder if she had already chosen to side with the quarians.

"I still hope for a peaceful solution." She knew what it wanted to say.

Legion's eyebrows were moving as if it was thinking. "The geth go to the old machine because they fear the creators wrath. They just want to live."

"The geth aren't even alive." Admiral Xen didn't buy it. "They're machines."

"Elementary, organic, and synthetic are all the same. Blue fairy said..." Suddenly, it stopped talking.

"Blue fairy? What's that?" The Admiral asked, but no one answered.

"Wait..." Although she still doubted Butterfly's ability, she knew Legion and Butterfly were up to something. "You call my daughter blue fairy. Does that have anything to do with this blue fairy?"

Legion's hands moved awkwardly as its head spun around. It was obvious the geth was nervous. "Data blocked. Cannot complete request."

"Legion," Shepard warned. "Don't test my patience."

A peep interrupted them. Tali took a quick look on the new message and exclaimed out loud. "Auntie Raan's ship was shot down!"

Admiral Shala'Raan was a friend of Tali's family. She was the one who delivered Tali and looked after her. Shepard understood why the young Admiral looked frightened.

_Damn, B was right. We never have enough time._

"Shut that server down Legion, and be quick. If both of you don't stop shooting, this madness might end with the extinction of both sides." And then she headed to the shuttle bay.

* * *

Anyone can see 'One upon a time' reference? It's kind of amusing to wrote this chapter. In fact, I was thinking about this since I watched the series. Well, I think I have a thing about men with sexy voice. XD

Enough with idle talk, I must thank The Lonely Traveler for beta. I couldn't come this far without her.


	42. Back to your root

"The entire universe is all related."

_- W. Vajiramedhi, Ahimsa, Path to peace._

* * *

**Back to your Roots**

* * *

_Rannoch - the walled garden._

Tali looked up, watching the blue sky of her homeworld in awe. For her whole life, she had dreamt of this moment. To walk in the solid land, to breath the air of home. Every quarian had shared the same dream for a very long time.

If only it would be under better circumstances...

Not far from the landing point, the team found the crash site. The young admiral bit her lip as bodies of her people lay in a pool of blood. Some of them survived the crash only to be finished by the geth.

Shepard wanted to say something, but Kaidan stopped her by touching her shoulder.

"It will be the best if she can pass through this by herself."

With trust, the Commander nodded.

Not long after, Tali pulled herself together and they continued searching. However, their comm link wasn't working.

It wasn't a mystery, though. From their spot, the jamming tower was standing on the horizon. The signal disrupted their communication. If the signal wasn't shut down, they wouldn't be able to contact the survivors, let alone Cortez or the Normandy.

"Let's move." Shepard ordered.

Tali nodded. She would spend her time enjoying this garden later. For now, she had a duty.

* * *

_Nar Tasi - child of no one._

In the beginning, they were only laborers, created for serving. But at some point, the quarians made a mistake. The geth gained sentience and started asking questions.

They were curious. But the creators thought it signified danger.

The quarians thought it would be best to shut the geth down before they conceived a revolt, but that only forced the geth to protect themselves. In the end, the result of the war was the exile of the quarians.

It was nearly three centuries after the Morning War. The quarians died and passed away with their longing of a home passed to the next generations, but the geth, they barely changed.

Until the old machine came...

They watched as the heretics departed from the true geth to join Nazara (aka Sovereign). After the Reaper was defeated, they followed Commander Shepard's footsteps going planet to planet. In the meantime, Legion learned many things.

The long journey ended on Alchera.

Amidst the eternal snow, they looked at broken platform that once was Shepard in silence. The cold preserved her body. Her eye was still looking blankly at the dark sky although the other eye was no longer in its socket.

Shepard-Commander had been shut down. For the organics, this was what they called death. Legion knew the word but did not exactly understand it. Although their platforms were destroyed, their software could 'move on' to another platform. So they weren't really dead unless they were wiped out.

Synthetics had nothing in common with organics, they said. But Legion thought they and Shepard-Commander had one thing in common.

The savior of Citadel was an orphan. She was abandoned by her creators... just like the geth.

They were unwanted children. Children of no one.

* * *

_Keelah se'lai - By the homeworld I hope to see one day._

Other races might think those words were some kind of mantra. For the quarians, those words were a reminder, to keep hope alive.

"Tell my son... Tell him... his father made it to the homeworld."

Dorn'Hazt took his last breath. Tali touched his helmet softly and said goodbye. Another soul fell to the planet of Rannoch. The poor man had never held a gun his entire life but he went this far before the geth took him down.

_I hope we can get Admiral Koris in time._ Shepard prayed. He and Tali were the sanest quarian admirals. Without him, this war would get worse.

"There's an AA gun tower ahead." Kaidan informed. "We have to shut it down. Otherwise, Cortez won't be able to help us take down the jamming tower. We have to move."

No time to mourn.

"We'll come back to give them a proper funeral." Shepard promised. "Now, we have to fight for the people that remain."

Tali looked at her human friends. She hoped she had their strength. They were each other's side fulfilling the void of the other. They were equals despite their differences.

Perhaps Shepard never noticed, but she was stronger when Kaidan was with her. Tali hoped her and Garrus could be the same.

Sighing, she gave the dead a last respect before following the Commander to the battlefield.

* * *

_Vas Normandy - Crew of Normandy_

There was nothing wrong with her enviro-suit, but Admiral Xen felt the heat in her helmet. Her brain was overheated by the information she had received the past few hours. Time was the only thing she needed right now, but also was what she lacked.

The fleet tried their best to protect the liveships. Too bad, the geth fighters were too swift. Another ship just fell to the planet.

Forty-seven minutes... Legion had been inactive that long but the situation hadn't changed. She couldn't help but wonder if it lied. For all her life, Xen encountered a lot of geth but never found a friendly one. Despite the Commander's opinion, she wasn't sure if they could trust this geth.

_What if it was only a trick? What if this synthetic is just playing them for a fool?_

Looking at Legion again, she sighed in frustration. She voted to wage war because she believed they could win, but it was a grave mistake. And now her people paid for it.

"Admiral Xen, you have an incoming call from Admiral Han'Gerrel." EDI interrupted her thoughts.

More bad news? She braced herself for the worst before accepting the call. "Has anything happened, Gerrel?"

"You aren't going to believe this Xen." The man sounded excited. "But the geth fighters are... They're just shutting down."

"What? They are shutting down? You mean they stopped attacking?"

"They stopped moving and didn't react when they got hit. It's like they ran out of energy. Many still fight, though."

"How could this be possible?" She looked at Legion. It was still inactive.

"I have no idea. But if this continues, we might have a chance to fight back." Han'Gerrel wasn't a bloodlust soldier. But he knew the Flotilla wasn't as safe as it looked. Their ships damaged beyond repair. They needed to settle down before the whole fleet was in ruin.

They sent a ship out to find a new home, but it went down on an uncharted planet. If Commander Shepard didn't rescue the survivors, they might have never known what happened to the crew.

But Xen hesitated. If Legion was true to its word, they might able to trust the geth. They probably should try to negotiate like Tali and Koris suggested. "I don't think that's a good idea. This war cost us too much. We have to focus on saving our people first."

Annoyed, Gerrel almost groaned. "You listened to the Commander, didn't you?"

"What if what she said is true, Han? What if the geth just want to live?" Whatever had happened to those geth fighters, she was rather sure it was Legion's doing. And the fact that it helped the quarians made her question her belief.

"They're synthetics. They're not even alive." Gerrel couldn't believe his ears. "You studied them for your entire life. You, of all people, should know better."

"I studied inactive geth. That's a lot different from active geth."

"Admiral Rael'Zorah studied active geth. And look what happened to him and his assistants? You can't trust them, Xen." He protested.

Tali's father reassembled a geth from savaged parts. The first thing that thing did was kill everyone in sight. The quarians believed the young Zorah had something to do with it. If Commander Shepard hadn't proven Tali's innocence, they might have banished her.

Still, the old man's study wasn't useless. She continued his research and finally developed technology of white-noise jamming against geth radar. After centuries, the quarians had a major advantage to wage war against the geth.

They might win if the Reapers didn't interfere.

Sighing, Xen looked at Legion again. "Commander Shepard worked with one of them. She does trust it and... I think it's working on shutting the signal down."

"What? Are you kidding me?"

"How could I lie about something so important? It said it would shut the server down, and you see what's happening." She paused briefly. "Perhaps we were wrong the entire time."

Gerrel didn't like that. "You better go back to your ship before they brainwash you, Xen."

_Why am I not surprised?_ She sighed. However, her terminal beeped, interrupting them. "This... Keelah, I found another Reaper signal on Rannoch."

"What? Where's the Commander? She has to know this."

"She is on Rannoch, trying to rescue our people. Keelah, I must tell her."

"The jamming transmission, remember? We can't contact her until the communication's clear." He warned.

Legion finally woke up. Its sudden movement almost made the admiral jump. "Keelah, you scare the shit out of me!"

"Sorry, creator." The geth apologized.

"Never mind that. What about your mission? Have you shut that server down? I'm afraid we have another signal to shut down. Today is the longest day in my life."

"It was the Blue Fairy. She shut it down."

"Blue Fairy? What's the Blue Fairy?" She asked, confused.

Ignoring Xen, Legion turned to leave.

"Wait, where are you going?" Still, the quarian asked. "Commander Shepard isn't here. You shouldn't go anywhere without her knowing."

"We are going to go to Rannoch. Shepard-Commander needs help."

"But the shuttle hasn't returned yet."

"The geth fighter is still in the shuttle bay." An unfamiliar voice answered via intercom. "Come on, Pinocchio. I need a local guide."

"Local guide? She sounds like Commander Shepard."

Again, Xen's question was ignored. Legion left the war room although the quarian tried to call him back.

"Bosh'tet, that thing just walked away like it's one of the crew." The admiral cursed.

"That's right. He's one of the crew." The voice interrupted her thoughts. "I don't care what you think. For me, he's Legion Vas Normandy."

* * *

_Geth - servant of the people_

One eternal truth: the civilians never wanted to go to war. But war always affects them one way or another.

Xem'Kraim was an engineer. Repairing ships was what he did best and he was happy with it. Never once before had he ever dreamt of being a soldier. Well, he had gotten into a few fights during his pilgrimage but those were all in self-defense. He wasn't good with a gun. Mostly, he depended on his tech ability or grenades.

And he just bombed a geth armature with the last grenade he had.

Another friend had fallen. Kraim stared at the body in horror. So many friends of his had been shot down by the geth since their ship went down. Admiral Koris and a few men stayed behind to give them a chance to flee, but the group didn't make it far. Some men departed from them to disable the jamming tower. Still, he wondered if they had made it. None of them were soldiers and this planet was infected with those synthetic bastards after all.

He glared at the other survivors. From the same cover, a group of females and children were looking at him. They were shivering with fear.

They were going to die. He knew it but couldn't say it.

"For Rannoch," Kraim took a deep breath. He grabbed the gun of a fallen friend and jumped from cover.

A geth prime aimed at him. The quarian froze as the synthetic exploded before his eyes. Someone had used overload on it.

No time for confusion, he jumped again when another geth prime walked to him. His finger automatically pulled the trigger but nothing happened. He realized briefly that his gun was sabotaged.

"It's alright." A female human floated down from a geth fighter. She was wearing a mask so he couldn't see her face, but her armor had the Alliance's signature. "They're with us. He just saved you."

"What? But this... How could did you get a geth prime to work with you?" Kraim almost cried. "Asked them nicely?"

"Yeah, I did. In fact, this war would never have happened if any of you talked to them before shooting." A geth armature interrupted her speech and other geth foot soldiers began shooting at them.

Geth primes summoned their droids and turrets. Their guns shot the geth troopers down in a single shoot. They fought the hostile geths as the human shielded the quarians with a biotic barrier. However, the geth fighter shot the geth armature to hell.

Kraim gasped in shock as he saw the pilot. It was another geth!

After the smoke of fighting disappeared, the human faded her barrier and waved at the geth fighter.

"I think we're alright. Let's call mommy and inform her. The later we call, the angrier she will be. Remember we all might get punished when she finds out we sneaked away from the Normandy." She radioed the pilot.

"The jamming tower was disabled. We can contact her. Wait a moment..." The synthetic voice answered. "Her channel is busy. But we will connect to... Jiminy Cricket."

The human waited patiently.

It took some time before she received a response. "Shepard-Commander rescued creator-admiral. She demands us to get back to the Normandy ASAP."

"You go back. I will stay with this folk until the rescue ship comes." The human said.

"No way, Princess." Someone yelled back from the other side of the line. "I won't leave you here alone. I mean- Lola will be pissed if I did."

Sighing, she replied. "I'm not alone. I have five geth primes and a group of quarians with me. These people are exhausted and need medical attention. I can't leave them like this."

"I expect nothing less from Shepard's child." Another voice chimed in. "Stay put, girl. The rescue will come shortly. I'll make sure of that."

"Thanks uncle Garrus. But I think we need shelter."

A geth prime raised its hand. "We can assist you."

"Really?" Kraim exclaimed. Today was getting more and more interesting.

"We are servants of the people." The synthetic replied. "We are here to serve."

Although he didn't trust the geth, the quarian didn't have any choice. His fellow quarians were exhausted and wounded. Their suits were damaged. If they didn't get to a sterile shelter soon, they would get sick.

Although Rannoch was their homeworld, they still needed time to adjust their systems. For now, they couldn't even breathe the air without risking the flu.

The human waved and the geth fighter left. She ordered the geth to build a tent. However, Kraim couldn't suppress his curiosity.

"I'm Xem'Kraim Vas Qwib Qwib. May I know your name?"

The human took her mask off. His heart stopped as he saw her face. For a human, she was gorgeous, especially when she smiled.

"People call me Butterfly." She shook his hand. "We can talk later. Let's check on your comrades first."

"Not that I'm ungrateful. But we have our doctor." He pointed at his friend who was talking with the children. "You're human. I'm not sure you know anything about us."

"You'd be surprised..." Her words cut off. Everyone automatically held their ears as a horrid sound shrieked through the air.

"That... That's the horn of..." Kraim sputtered.

"The stupid AI." Butterfly frowned, but there was no trail of fear on her face. "Change of plans, Kraim. We have to move."

* * *

Kraim is my quarian engineer in MP mode. Mostly, I replied on his tech and grenades. He was my favorite until I got N7 units.

I know I said it several times, but I never bore to say it. Thank The Lonely Traveler for the beta :D


	43. Elementary

"In a cup of tea, if considered in depth, we can conclude that atoms and the universe are inseparable."

_- W. Vajiramedhi, Best question, Bright answer_

* * *

**Elementary**

* * *

"A short description: the geth server was infected by a Reaper virus. Cleaning them was like wiping out a city. But we managed to save as many geth programs as we were able."

"By transferring them to platforms of geth prime units?" Kaidan asked.

"Correct."

"But why?" The Major was still confused.

"They want to join us." Legion turned to Shepard who was deep in thought. "We persuaded hostile geth programs to reunite with ours. They have renounced the old machines and will oppose the Reapers. They are now with us."

"But why now?" The Commander asked. "If you can do this by yourself, why didn't you clean the server before?"

It took some time before Legion answered. "We could not do it without the Blue Fairy. She is neither organic nor synthetic. The geth server could not have predicted her presence, so she was able to pass the protection."

"The Blue Fairy again? You have to explain that. We won't take off until you do." Shepard commanded firmly. She was still tired after the last mission but didn't have time to rest. Her shuttle and the geth fighter had just landed on the Normandy when Butterfly reported to them about the Reaper's base.

She was angry her daughter went to the battlefield without her permission, but the girl had done a good job so far. Shepard couldn't berate her. For now, at least,

On a nearby seat, Garrus and Tali exchanged a stare. Their shuttle was flying amidst Rannoch's sky and soon would get to the coordinates Butterfly sent them. But they wouldn't go further until Legion gave the Commander an answer.

The Shepard-Alenkos were stubborn folk.

"About three months ago, we found her in one of the geth servers. At first, we misconceived thinking she was a virus. But we learned she is not a synthetic." Legion began.

"Wait. I've heard about this before." Shepard frowned. "In Project Overlord, Cerberus had created a VI to control the geth. At one point, Gavin Archer forced his brother, David Archer to incorporate himself into the VI program. But the boy couldn't take it. The VI went berserk and the project ended in disaster. Is your Blue Fairy another David?"

"We do not think so. She is independent and she does not need a VI or transmitter to enter the geth server. She said it was like connecting through a wireless-connection."

Kaidan didn't exactly understand, but he didn't like it. "Whoever she is, her ability is valuable. This Blue Fairy will be in danger if Cerberus or the Reapers find out about her."

"That is why we agree to keep her secret. However, Cerberus got her. We attempted to help her but the Reaper got us first. Fortunately, she is free now."

"But... You called B Blue Fairy? Don't tell me this has nothing to do with her, right?" Impatient, Shepard cut it off.

"But Butterfly is organic." Tali chimed in. She could no longer suppress her curiosity. "Legion said Blue Fairy is neither organic nor synthetic... Exactly, what is she? I never heard of such a thing before."

Legion's eye blinked, but it didn't get a chance to speak. Cortez got a call from Butterfly and everyone listened.

"This is Butterfly. Do you read, uncle Cortez?"

Before the pilot could say anything, Shepard answered it. "This is _YOUR_ mother. I'm reading you, B. What's your situation?"

They heard the girl sigh. "I'm atop a mountain near the Reaper's base. Don't worry. The quarians are in a safe place. The geth are taking care of them."

"I'm not..." The Commander fought the urge to yell at the top of her lungs. She worried about no one but Butterfly. Why didn't the girl know? "Don't tell me you're going into the base alone."

"With all due respect, I'm not stupid, ma'am. But this Widow gives me a nice view from this distance. I have to walk closer for a better view. I won't let them see me, though."

Kaidan wasn't sure if he should laugh or not. Butterfly was really her mama's girl. She snapped back at her mother glibly. And that_ 'with all due respect'_ reminded him of Ash.

After being quiet for a very long time, James finally said. "Do the geth see us? We aren't exactly invisible. They might look out the windows and..."

"Geth do not use windows. Structural weakness," Legion answered.

"Why didn't I think of it before?" James murmured, sounding like he was talking to himself.

"Shall we go pick Butterfly up, ma'am?" Ignoring his friend, Cortez asked the Commander. "I can see her now. She is... Is that morse code?"

Shepard looked out. On the mountain, there was an abnormal light that was blinking in series. She looked through the scope of her rifle and saw Butterfly reflecting something shiny to the sun.

"I am in the range of the jamming signal." Cortez read the message. "We'll be detected if we use the comm link."

"So she uses ancient code?" James exclaimed. He couldn't read the code. The morse code was history in his time, only few people used or remembered it. Still, the pilots had learned about it in flying school. It sounded useless in the age where people used computers, but useful now.

"Simple is better. I bet those geth would never detect it. My girl is fucking brilliant." Shepard was very proud.

"What is morse code?" Legion tried to search the extranet for an answer but found none.

"Probably some military code." Garrus presumed. "It must be very old if there's no data about it on the extranet."

"Humans haven't used this code for more than two hundred years. Speaking of which, where did she learn it?" Nobody answered. Shepard just shrugged it off. "Get us to that base, Lieutenant. As fast as you can."

Legion's light blinked. She knew that was its way to ask for permission to speak.

"What is it, Legion?"

"Once this signal is disabled, the geth will pose no threat to the creator forces."

"And?" Shepard frowned. As did everyone else.

"While the old machines have unethical purposes, their upgrades have vastly improved our people. They are able to think for themselves. No need to be connected to others."

Although no one could see her face, Tali sounded shocked. "That... That's a fully evolved AI!"

"Yes." Somehow, Legion sounded dreamy. "We do not agree with the old machines, but we find this growth... beautiful. Indicative of life."

"Is that why you saved those prime units?" Although she didn't fully understand, she couldn't deny the concept of an evolved AI.

The geth stared at her for a long while. "Yes. They do not deserve to die."

"Did the Blue Fairy know you were planning to save them?"

"Yes, she knew and also helped us. The Blue Fairy is the second non-synthetic who trusts us."

"Who is the first?" James asked, slightly playful.

Legion looked at the Commander. "Shepard-Commander is Geppetto... the first organic who trusts us. We promise we would not overstep your trust."

Those words sounded sentimental, especially when it came from the synthetic. Shepard wasn't sure how to answer.

"Commander," The pilot interrupted them. "Prepare for landing."

Tali also gave Shepard something that looked like a big gun. "The jamming towers prevented us from orbital targeting the base. This targeting laser is syncing with the targeting system that was developed by Admiral Xen. It's synced to the Normandy's targeting computer. You just aim, and then our fleet and the Normandy shoot at the mark."

"Sounds useful, if the shockwave doesn't knock us off." She took it anyway.

They split into two teams. The first led by Shepard. The second led by Kaidan. The Major wasn't pleased he had James and Liara in his team. Well, he didn't mind the asari. But the young lieutenant made him feel uneasy.

Tali and Garrus went with Shepard while the geth ran off alone. Butterfly was still on the mountain, covered their rear from afar. It was rare to see an adept who used a sniper rifle, but he did trust his little princess for the task. Her uncle Garrus was her shooting skill trainer after all.

Cortez and the shuttle left. James looked up and saw the reflection.

"Hey, Major, do you know what she is messaging?"

Kaidan wasn't an expert of morse code, but he got the message. The Major couldn't help but chuckle. Somehow that made the lieutenant felt uncomfortable.

"What's so funny?"

"She said you should stay out of her scope. Your ass is big enough to cover a geth prime."

Even Shepard couldn't make him blush, but that comment made his head hot with embarrassment. "No way. You made it up, didn't you?"

"Maybe I misread." The older man grinned mischievously. "She didn't message you."

James made a face. However, he turned around and saw Shepard was sending a signal to Butterfly by turning her flashlight on and off repeatedly. Judging by her face, it seemed they were arguing.

"Is it just my imagination, or is it your girls don't get along?"

Kaidan sighed. "Butterfly asked if she could go with us. But Amala... Shepard didn't allow it. I think you know the rest."

"They both are stubborn." The younger man patted his shoulder in understanding. "I might be able to relieve one of your burdens, daddy."

The Major knew James just wanted to bother him. But he frowned and flared his biotics. "I can make it look like an accident, you know?"

"Whoa, I jest!" James stepped back to stand behind Liara who was laughing.

"That's not funny." Kaidan grumbled.

However, they stopped talking when Shepard ordered them to move. They took different ways but shared the same destination.

Many types of geth were on their way. Since it was useless to sneak pass them, Shepard began shooting before the synthetic could see her.

As the Commander and her team engaged with a group of geth prime and other foot soldiers, a geth rocket trooper aimed its rocket launcher at them. But a bullet hit it straight at its head, and the rocket hit the prime instead.

"That's my girl!" Garrus shouted. Shepard almost heard a smile in his voice.

A sniper shot the rest of the geth down before she radioed her mother. They were no longer hiding, so no need to worry about being detected. "Have to move. They would find me if I had stayed."

"Cover your dad... I mean, Major Alenko. And try not get caught in the crossfire."

"On it."

Shepard cut the line with a sigh. She noticed the turian was glaring at her. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"I just wonder. You spoke to Butterfly as if she was another marine?"

"Nothing strange. In battlefield, she's my subordinate. I'm in charge, and she follows my command. B is capable, I admit. But it's too soon to let her on her own."

"I bet all parents think the same way." Tali patted her shoulder. "My father wasn't so happy when I took my Pilgrimage. He always thought I was too weak to be on my own. During my Pilgrimage, he kept sending me vid-mails, lecturing me about being a strong quarian. Well, there are a lot of things I can tell you, but we don't have the luxury of time."

"Of course," The Commander sighed again. "Let's move."

* * *

"Step back." Shepard warned as she was standing on the small platform that was overhanging a gigantic hole. She raised the target laser, aiming at the source of the Reaper's signal that looked like a transmitter of some sort.

"The laser guidance system is ready, Commander." EDI informed via comm link.

The rest of the team was standing aside. Kaidan frowned in concern but didn't say anything. They never walked an easy or safe path. Although he had a bad feeling, he couldn't stop Shepard.

Still, he also worried for his daughter. Butterfly hadn't followed them into the building but was still in hiding from the geth. He hoped she was in a safe zone.

Looking up to the sky, the organic's eyes couldn't see any difference. But the geth radar would detect the whole fleet of quarian ships sooner or later. They must hurry.

"On my mark," Shepard ordered. The laser locked on target and then... BOOM! The Normandy swooped down and did bombard it.

She was in a safe distance, but the shockwave knocked the platform down under her feet. The Commander fell down like a rock. Luckily, it wasn't so high so she didn't get that injured.

She forgot any pain as a gigantic machine raised from the hole. The Reaper looked pissed and searching around for the source of the attack. The human was so small compared to it so it didn't see Shepard at first.

"Holy crap!" James exclaimed. He hadn't forgotten his encounter with the Reaper on Tuchanka and hoped he would never encounter another one.

"Amala!" Kaidan called. He slid down the debris to stand near her.

"We have to move!" That was all she could think. Butterfly warned her about this but she just didn't believe the girl. Damn.

"Shepard-Commander, we have located transportation." Legion informed in the right moment.

"Copy that. Everyone get to Legion. Move!" As she ran, Shepard tried to call Butterfly but there was no response. She huffed angrily when the Reaper began chasing the team.

Legion's commandeered a ground vessel and drove to them. As Shepard ran to it, a geth tried to shoot her from behind but Kaidan knocked it down with his rifle and then Tali finished it.

They jumped into the vessel. There was no time for a head count. Legion drove the vessel from the base as fast as it was able.

"How are we supposed to fight that thing?" Tali yelled. She had never seen a Reaper this up close and personal.

"I was hoping your fleet might lend a hand." Shepard yelled back. However, that gave her an idea. Shepard contacted the fleet immediately. "Shepard to fleet, it isn't a Reaper base! It's a live Reaper. I need an orbital strike!"

The call was interfered. She heard a familiar voice in the line. "Hit the firing chamber! It's a weak spot when it's priming."

"What? How could you know that, B?"

"I read the walkthrough." Although it was not a good time to jest, Butterfly couldn't help it. "This isn't the time, mommy. Shoot that monster down already!"

Still grumbling, Shepard aimed the targeting laser at the Reaper. "EDI, patch the quarians into the Normandy's weapon system."

"Copy that," the AI answered.

Shepard waited until it primed and then locked the target.

"Fire!"

The fleet and the Normandy bombarded the Reaper with everything they had. To everyone's surprise, the old machine stood still as it was about to shot its beam at them and it suddenly collapsed. After a thunderous sound and small earthquake, they could see it lay on the ground, inactive.

The vessel stopped. James stood up to watch the result. "Holy hell... Did we kill it?"

"It can't be that easy." Kaidan said. "Three years ago, the Alliance fleet fought Sovereign with everything we had, but it was still a long fight."

"Perhaps we hit it in the right spot?" Still, the lieutenant couldn't believe it either.

Quickly, Legion ran an analysis on the Reaper. "The old machine is still functioning. We may escape before it recovers."

"No." Instantly, Shepard refused. "If we don't end this now, the geth still under control of the Reaper and the quarians will be killed. You all run. I'll take care of this."

"What? Are you going to take down the Reaper on foot?" Kaidan sounded panicked.

There was no time for arguing. The Reaper began to move, and then Shepard shouted. "Go!"

The Major didn't like it, not even a little bit, but he knew she was right. So when Garrus pulled him back into the vessel, he followed easily.

Shepard didn't look as her squad left. Her eyes locked on the gigantic machine that slowly got up on its feet (or tentacles). In her hands was a targeting laser. Although she was in fear, she wouldn't back down.

In no time, the Reaper began to move. It tried to stump on her. Luckily, it was a lot slower because of the damage. Shepard almost didn't have a problem dodging. Sure enough, that made the machine angry. Eventually, it stepped backward to shoot the beam.

And that's what she was waiting for.

_Boom!_ Every gun in the quarian fleet and the Normandy shot at the same target. A bombard was enough to make the gigantic machine collapse.

Still, the Reaper was hard to kill. Despite the damage, it still struggled to get up. For Shepard, her condition wasn't good. After the long fights, her flank ached, every muscle in her began to cry and her energy was nearly spent. Only willpower and Cerberus cybernetic implants kept her moving.

The Reaper movement was slower, and so was Shepard. She felt her body move slower and the target laser became heavier. Once, the giant leg stumped on a large rock, causing it to shatter. A large piece missed Shepard only by a few inches. But the force was enough to knock her on the ground. Shepard gasped in pain as her bruised flank hit the rock.

Again, the old machine walked backward to get proper distant for shooting the beam. Shepard struggled to her feet but it was too late. A red beam ran toward her before she could lock the target.

Human instinct commanded her to close her eyes. It was hot like hell fire. She felt like she was cooked alive.

"Mom..." A familiar voice called.

_Am I still alive?_ She quickly opened her eyes. The picture in front of her made her body freeze.

Butterfly was there, shielding them. A biotic barrier protected both of them from the beam but the girl was pushed backward. Her legs slowly slumped.

"I... can't hold... Shoot it now!"

Instinct kicked in. Shepard aimed the firing chamber, ignoring the ache in her arms.

This bombard was enough.

The world seemed to move in slow motion. The beam from the fleet was like a thunder strike. Its shell shattered and then collapsed. Shepard could see every shard fall.

As soon as the beam faded, Butterfly's barrier disappeared. Shepard caught her before the small frame fell down. In shock, the Commander didn't hear the quarian admirals' cheer from the fleet.

She took the mask off from her daughter. And all she saw was blood.

"Amala!" Kaidan shouted. In concern, he jumped off of the vessel before it stopped and ran to his girls. The Major almost cried at the picture of his daughter limped and lifeless. Crimson blood seeped from her nostrils and mouth.

"She protected me!" Desperate, Shepard held her daughter tight and cried.

_It's my fault!_ She repeated those words in her head over and over like a mad woman.

The team was speechless. Victory came with a price they didn't want to pay. Tali gripped Garrus' arm tight, and cried quietly.

Kaidan wanted to blast, to rant. But that wouldn't help anything so he tried to calm down. Although he was sure the girl was dead, he scanned Butterfly's body with his Omni-tool. Barely, but he found a pulse.

"She is still alive!"

"What? Really?" Forgetting everything else, she wiped the girl's face with her hand, looking for a sign of life. She yanked her hand off quickly after she touched the back of Butterfly's head. "God, her amp is so hot like it's on fire!"

The parents stared at each other. They knew if the amp was too hot, it could cook a biotic's brain.

"I can stabilize her. But we should bring her on board. Sooner we get her to Chakwas, the better." Still, Kaidan tried not to think about the worst. Wordlessly, Shepard nodded, and then he gave her a shot of medicine before calling Cortez.

As Kaidan walked away, Legion stepped toward Shepard. "Shepard-Commander. The geth acted only in self-defense after the creators attacked us. Do we deserve to die?"

"Can we debate later? My daughter is badly injured. I can't think straight." Tears stopped, but her voice still cracked. The mother didn't want to do anything until Butterfly was safe.

"We understand you are sad. But this cannot wait. With the old machine dead, the geth are inactive. We calculated the creators would take this opportunity to wipe us out. We have a plan to save our people, but we must act now."

Damn right. Those admirals would be glad to kill every single geth. If she wanted to save them, she had to do it before the quarians attacked again.

Looking at Butterfly, the mother made a decision. "No. They don't deserve to die. But how could you save them?"

"We could upload the Reaper's upgrade to all geth. With the old machine's death, they can be upgraded to the true intelligence without sacrificing their independence."

"But..." Tali gasped. "That would make them as smart as when the Reaper was controlling them!"

Still looking at Shepard, the geth answered. "Yes, but with free will. Each geth unit would be free, alive, and we could help you."

"But my fleet is already attacking!" Panicked, the quarian cried. "Uploading the code would destroy us. You can't let it happen, Shepard!"

"We do not want to die as well, Creator Tali'Zorah. We never understood why your people tried to kill us in the first place. They even killed the creators who tried to protect us. What have we done that make your people hate us so much? Do we deserve to live? Does this unit have a soul?"

Shepard felt torn. Both Tali and Legion were her friends and both their people deserved to live. She didn't want to make the decision. Why did everything always depend on her?

On her lap, Butterfly was lying unconscious. She looked at the girl again and made her decision. "Legion, upload the code. Tali, call off the fleet if you can."

As Legion began to upload, Tali tried to call her people.

"Uploading. Ten percent."

"This is Admiral Tali'Zorah. All units, break off your attack, now!"

But the damn ignorant admiral didn't listen. Han'Gerrel overrode her command. "Belay that order. Continue the attack!"

Not hearing the quarians, the geth continue its work. "Twenty percent."

Groaning in frustration, Tali stared at Shepard and Legion. "Please, I beg you. Please stop this."

"We do not want the death of the creators, but we want to live. We see no alternative. Forty percent."

"No! Shepard, do something." She begged.

"That troublesome jackass. I will kick Gerrel's ass when I meet him again." The Commander grumbled. Still, she called the fleet. "All ships. This is Commander Shepard. Stand down."

"This is Admiral Tali'Zorah. Shepard speaks with my authority!" The young admiral supported her quickly.

"And mine, as well." After listening for a long time, Koris added.

Stubborn jackass was stubborn. Gerrel disobeyed them. "We can win this war. Keep firing!"

"Sixty percent." Legion kept working.

"The geth are about to return to full strength. If you don't stop attacking, they will wipe us out!" Desperate, Tali pleaded.

"Please believe me for a minute." Shepard growled. Butterfly couldn't go to the Normandy if they were stuck here. The mother was about to rage. "Your entire history is you trying to kill the geth. You forced them to rebel. You forced them to ally with the Reaper. If only you'll believe me and stop the attack for a minute, this war will be over."

"Eighty percent." Legion informed.

"You have a choice." The Commander added. "Keelah, se'lai."

There was a long pause. Everyone held their breath, waiting for a response.

"All units... Hold fire." At last, Gerrel gave up.

They let a breath out in relief. Shepard tightened her embrace around her daughter. Although in the back of her mind, she was still concerned that Butterfly could hold the Reaper's beam; she didn't want to think about it right now.

But Legion broke the silence. "Error. Copying code is insufficient. Direct personality dissemination required."

"What... What does that mean?" _No, it couldn't be._

"Shepard-Commander. W... I must go to them."

"No. Legion... What about your Blue fairy? Perhaps she can help." She didn't want to lose another friend. This war had cost her enough.

The geth looked down at the body on her lap. It seemed defeated. "She is not functional."

"What? You mean Butterfly is Blue fairy?" Kaidan exclaimed as he walked back. "Oh, I... Perhaps I shouldn't be surprised. The blue butterfly... It makes sense now."

"You guys have to explain that to me." Shepard felt lost.

It wasn't the time for that, though.

"Goodbye, Shepard-Commander."

"Wait!" Tali called. She still didn't trust Legion fully, but she had to say, "For the question you asked, my answer is yes. Keelah Se'lai."

"Prove yourself brave, truthful, and unselfish. And you will become a real boy." He said the blue fairy's quote. "Keelah Se'lai, Tali'Zorah."

And then, he shut down.

Metallic body fell to the ground like a puppet. The sound of the falling body echoed in the area and the wind carried it far away as the whole planet seemed to fall silent to give the geth his last respect.

* * *

Thank The Lonely Traveler for beta. And thank my dear followers and favorite. I love you all :D


	44. Live and learn

"If the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts."

_- Albert Einstein_

* * *

**Live and Learn**

* * *

Three years ago, if someone had told her, she would mourn a geth, Tali would have laughed. But life always has surprises in store. Now, she was standing in the engineering deck, staring at the drive core and listening to Auntie Raan's voice message.

'_Even now, I still can't believe we're in the homeworld and rebuilding our home. And we have the geth as our... friends. They help us build houses, hospitals, and schools and... By the time you return, I'm sure we will have at least a village, and a farm. Do you remember I told you that I always want to be a rancher?_

_The first thing they built was your house, little one. It's on the cliff you claimed and where your friend, Legion died. The place isn't far from where we buried him. With the other units, we'll recycle their platforms but we can't do that to him. We owe him too much._

_And, oh, I almost forgot. The geth are helping us by merging with our volunteers. With that method, they will help us adapt to the environment. Someday, we won't need enviro-suits anymore. Imagine that, dear. Oh, I can't wait to see the day._

_We still have the war to win. Keep safe, girl. Until the day we march to Earth for the last battle. We'll be there for you, for our savior, Commander Shepard. Keelah Se'lei, my girl.'_

There was a brief pause.

'_Damn, I almost forgot again! Tell the Commander I wish her daughter well. We owe her as well. Kraim and the others sent their regards. The boy volunteers to help with the Alliance's special Ops. I think he hope to see Butterfly again. She got herself an admirer, it seems.'_

Tali gave a small smile. Butterfly was in the med bay since they came back on board fifty hours ago. And now, the Normandy was rushing through space to the Citadel. She could feel the stress in the air.

It was something between anxiety and fear. Everyone was concerned for the girl's life, but they couldn't forget the truth that Butterfly's shield could resist the Reaper's beam. Although it was only a few seconds, it was still incredible.

If she survived, Butterfly would be the most powerful biotic in the galaxy. Tali was sure of it. A light footstep woke her from daydreaming. The quarian turned around to greet the newcomer. Sure enough, it was Shepard, although she didn't look so good.

Fifty hours... Neither Shepard nor Alenko were able to sleep or eat. They tried, of course, but couldn't. Both of them kept pacing in front of the med bay until Chakwas chided them away. Twice.

Now, Shepard looked like she was about to collapse, but still unable to sleep.

"Hey, Shepard." The younger woman wasn't sure what to say.

"Hey," Shepard leaned on the console, head on the metallic surface. Even with the synthetic implants Cerberus gave her, she was exhausted.

"Um... How Butterfly's doing?"

Sighing, the Commander answered. "She woke up a few minutes ago. But she's still exhausted so Chakwas ordered her to eat before sleeping some more."

"Well, that is... great. But why do you look...?"

Hands holding her head, her shoulders slumped. Shepard looked smaller than usual.

"She almost died protecting me. Not any mother would be alright with that."

Tali hummed an agreement. Mostly, Shepard was the one who cheered her up. With the situation reversed, the quarian just didn't know what to say.

"Another thing... I still... I really can't wrap my head around it." She kept saying, as if she didn't want to keep quiet anymore. "I saw the Reaper take down an Alliance dreadnought with its beam. But B just... She could hold it. Although it was only for a few seconds, it was still unbelievable... inhuman, even."

"Yeah, that sounds... godlike. But we all know she isn't a god." Although Tali said that, she was still doubtful.

"I'm not sure, Tali. I don't understand a damn thing."

Shepard's voice trailed off. Tali could see the Commander passed out although she was still leaning on the console.

"The poor mother must be tired." The quarian messaged Kaidan to take Shepard back to her cabin.

It wasn't long before the Major came. He didn't look better than his girlfriend but at least he was still mobile. Garrus came along with him.

"Are you sure you don't need help?" The turian asked. "You look exhausted."

"I'm fine, Garrus. Amala isn't that heavy. In fact, I think she's lost too much weight lately. I really have to take her out for dinner."

"We're going to dock at the Citadel, right? You should take her somewhere nice. Tali and I will take care of Butterfly." Between Shepard and him there was more than comradeship, brothers almost. Garrus would gladly do anything that made Shepard happy.

"Thanks, but that's for later. I have to bring her back to the cabin."

Not easy, but the Major finally carried his girlfriend to the elevator. At last, the General and Admiral had time to speak in private.

A bit nervous, Tali didn't know where to put her hands. "Um, hey, Garrus."

The General patted the back of his head. He was always so sure in the battlefield, but talking to this woman was still nerve-wracking. How was it possible? He'd never understand.

"Hey yourself."

They talked and flirted a numerous of times. Tali felt silly for being nervous around the man she had known for years. "I... Shepard said Butterfly woke up. Is she alright?"

Garrus looked around to make sure they were alone before showing her a video footage.

"Don't tell Butterfly I recorded this. She'd be angry for years at me."

"When you mention it like that, I have to see it." She snuggled closer to look at the recording, and that brought her closer to Garrus' chest.

In the video Butterfly was eating a very big meal. She wolfed everything in the freezer down regardless of taste. Judging from the way she ate, she was really starving.

"Keelah, no lady wants anyone to take a picture when she eats like that. You're such a terrible turian, Garrus Vakarian."

He just chuckled. "I can't help it. But I swear I won't let anyone but you see this. Butterfly was much better after the meal. Chakwas said she spent too much energy, so she had to refill before going to bed."

"I'm glad she's alright. I hate to think what would happen if she... Shepard would never forgive herself. Losing friends is hard. But losing a daughter is... horrible."

Garrus placed his hand over Tail's. "I know. Shepard always acts tough, but she is more sensitive then she lets on. I hope I can help more, but the only thing I can do is support her when bad things happen."

Her face was hidden under the helmet, but her voice quivered. "Although the galaxy is going insane, having a good friend like you is a gift."

The turian couldn't blush, but Garrus still looked cute embarrassed. "You're a good friend too, Tali. I... Shepard will appreciate your kindness."

"So I'm 'just friend' for you?" Slyly, the quarian asked.

That took the General by surprise. Still, he was rather amused. "I walked right into that, didn't I?"

"Yeah, and this is when you will say something needing 'calibrations'."

_Damn, she knows me too well._ "Since you already said it, I do still have some calibrations to do."

Tali smacked his chest plate playfully and then turned back to engineering. Her hips were swaying more than necessary and the turian suddenly felt thirsty.

"Woman," that gun could wait. Garrus followed the Admiral with a big grin in his face.

* * *

Cerberus' implants were both a gift and curse. They made her stronger physically, and biotically. She didn't need much sleep and was able to resist potent toxics. The problem is she was also unable to oversleep, despite a comfortable bed. A few hours after she passed out, Shepard jerked awake from a nightmare she couldn't remember.

The pillow moved a little. She looked up only to see the sight of beautiful biotic. Kaidan seemed so peaceful in his sleep. She had to stop herself from kissing him because she didn't want to risk waking him.

He was tired. He after all didn't have the same implants as her, so he needed to sleep more. Shepard carefully left his arms and bed to take care of her own business.

When she came out the bathroom, it was 1300 in the day cycle. It wasn't strange that she was starving. The Commander dressed up and then headed to the crew deck.

Lunch time just ended, so the mess hall was almost deserted save only a few people.

Shepard couldn't believe her eyes as she saw Butterfly and James talking. The girl was sitting on the stool near the counter as the big guy stood behind it. Despite the counter between them, they seemed friendly.

James was enjoying telling Butterfly about his hometown so he didn't notice the Commander's presence. Silently, Shepard observed their gestures. She could tell her daughter enjoyed his company like a girl enraptured by a story teller. But the lieutenant looked...

She didn't like this.

"Good afternoon." Shepard greeted them with a too-sweet voice. Butterfly smiled and looked straight at her but James avoided her stare.

Suddenly, the man seemed to forget where to place his hands. He scratched the back of his head while still avoiding her eyes. "Afternoon, Lola. Glad to see you're better."

"Thanks, James, but what are you two doing?"

"Just talking. The Princess was curious about my childhood, so I told her about Rio."

Sounded innocent and harmless enough, but why did he look like a boy who was caught with his hand in the cookie jar? The motherly instinct kicked in and Shepard fought the urge to glare murderously at the man.

"I've heard it's an exciting place." Although she was Earthborn, she never had the chance to see any other city but New York. Her time in Vancouver didn't count because she was in custody. Sitting by the window and looking out the same view for six months wasn't sightseeing after all.

"You could say that. A warm sun, nice beach, and a lot of beautiful women, it's a nice city. I intend to go back for a vacation after the war, although..." With the Reaper invasion, the city probably had been destroyed. But he didn't want to talk about it.

"A vacation before your training? Sounds good."

"Training?" Butterfly looked at the lieutenant in question.

"Aye, they offered me a position in the N7 program. After talking with your mommy, I decided to accept it. It has to wait because of the war, though."

She was glad James finally befriended Butterfly, but why she didn't like the way he talked to her little girl?

"You mean… you're going to be an N7 like mommy? That's great."

James smiled so wide. Shepard never saw him smile like this before. "Thanks, Princess. I still have the training to pass. But since I have your mommy as my instructor, I'm sure I can do it."

"Wait, James. Why do you keep referring to me in third person?" The Commander interrupted.

Suddenly, the lieutenant sputtered. "I, um..."

He was hiding something. But she was too hungry to care. "I'm starving. Do we have something to eat?"

"There," Butterfly passed her dish to her mother. Shepard didn't know what it was called but she was sure it was James' cooking. The man loved spicy dishes. "I haven't eaten it. I'm full but James doesn't believe me."

"James? Didn't Butterfly call you 'Mr. Vega?' Wait, what happened? Why are you two... Befriending each other so quickly?"

"I don't see why not." The girl was confused. "What's wrong with that?"

Exactly, when Butterfly said that, Shepard didn't know what to say. "No, there's nothing wrong about it. I'm just... surprised."

Butterfly shrugged but James gulped something down his throat.

"Anyway," the atmosphere was uncomfortable, so Shepard changed the subject. "How are you feeling B? You took down the Reaper's beam, a normal person would never survive that."

"I'm alive. That should be enough."

That answer almost sounded rude, but Butterfly had a way to soften it. Although Shepard felt a bit offended, she didn't resent her.

"B, I ask because I worry about you."

Butterfly's face was softer. "Thanks mommy. But I'm just... I'll be fine. Grandma can guarantee it."

"You must understand me, B. When I saw you taking the beam, I thought I would lose you for sure." Forgetting her hunger, Shepard held her daughter tight. She sighed in relief at the feeling of the girl in her embrace. Now she understood why Kaidan always held her protectively in his sleep. "I'm strong enough to fight the Reapers, destroying the Collector's base, and saving the day. But I'm not strong enough to lose you. Please B, don't do anything like that again."

But Butterfly shook her head. "I can't promise you that. I can't lose you as well, mommy. And if I have to fight the Reaper to save you, so be it."

"Wait, you mean... You took the beam because you wanted to save me?"

"Yes, I did. But even I still have a limit. If that shot couldn't kill that Reaper, we both would have died."

"That is... incredible. Are you going to say that you shielded the Reaper's beam with your will?" Hackett would never believe this. Shepard thought.

"Exactly, I used my biotic barrier. But it was my will that controlled my biotics. They say a strong will can move mountains. It isn't only an aphorism, mommy."

Looking into Butterfly's eyes, Shepard knew the girl believed every word she said. Although the mother still had her doubts, she realized that no matter how unbelievable it was the things her daughter said were mostly true.

"I- I think I had heard something like that before... When I was young, I met a Buddhist monk. Although he wasn't a biotic, he knew how to control it and taught me his techniques... He said 'a strong will can move even mountains'."

"And with enough practice, a strong will is able to bend reality, to make a miracle." Butterfly added.

"No way, girl." Shepard said without thinking. "Liara's mother was a thousand year-old asari. She had a lot of time to practice her will, but she fell to Sovereign's indoctrination. You haven't even had your second birthday."

"Well, I cheat. Or you might say I took a shot cut." Still keeping her calm, Butterfly smiled softly.

"Excuse me?"

Butterfly looked around. She was glad that when they started talking, James had taken his leave to give them privacy. The other crew was far from earshot. "Do you believe in reincarnation, mommy?"

"The concept about our spirits being reborn in another form after we die? I can't say I do, B."

She was rather sure her daughter would be angry, but the girl just shrugged. "Then just think I'm going to tell you a tale. You don't have to believe me."

It could be madness. But people used to think her warnings about the Reapers was madness as well. "Tell me."

Butterfly leaned back on her stool, hands on her lap. "That not gonna happen. I can hold them off. Go get LT."

Shepard's blood froze. That... That were Ashley's last words. No one, even Kaidan knew about it. She didn't even write it in her report.

"B, that's impossible... Where did you hear those words?"

"We met in... you might call it the afterlife." And surely, she didn't mean the club on Omega. "She wants you to know she never blamed you for Virmire. And she's happy for you both."

Something caught in her throat. Her eyes hot with unshed tears. "Who... Who told you?"

Butterfly pouted. "You aren't even going to try to believe me, are you? I don't understand, mommy. Why are you so insistent in dismissing my story?"

"Because it's unbelievable!" God, she couldn't take this. Shepard shouted in anger and slammed the counter. "It bullshit, the things you said. Enough, you have to go to the hospital and they will exam you through and through."

The look Butterfly gave her was more than enough. The girl looked like she was about to cry but bit her lip instead. "Alright. If that is what you want. But if you don't mind, I want you to pass these words to daddy."

"What is that?"

Sighing, she turned away. "Tell him. Aunty Ash said you're welcome."

Stunned, Shepard just looked as her daughter walked away.

* * *

_Why did she keep denying Butterfly's story? _She had no idea.

Although Legion didn't say it out loud, he confirmed Butterfly was the Blue fairy who, with some magical method was able to hack her way into the geth server without using a transmitter or program.

Butterfly said a strong will was able to bend reality, which sounded insane enough. But she also mentioned reincarnation... that was bullshit, nonsensical, and unbelievable. How could she believe such things?

But she didn't have any better explanation either.

Perhaps she was in fear. She denied her daughter was some kind of space sorceress because she feared for Butterfly's life. If TIM or Hackett knew Butterfly's biotic shield could hold the Reaper's beam, they would try to take Butterfly from her. Well, TIM tried that several times already.

She knew Hackett was a good man. But when people feel desperate they do anything. He might take Butterfly from her family for experiments. Worse was Shepard couldn't deny that order because the fate of galaxy maybe depended on the research.

Shepard could sacrifice herself if it meant the future of the galaxy and people she loved. But she wasn't sure she could sacrifice Butterfly or Kaidan.

And she didn't want to find out.

Sighing, the Commander tried to write her report. She was torn between telling the truth and keeping Butterfly's ability a secret.

After all, she was only human, a mother. She wanted to keep her daughter safe.

She was sitting in her chair. Hands were holding her throbbing head. Time passed for a good long while until she heard Kaidan gasp. The man reached for her in his sleep and jerked awake when he found her side of the bed empty.

This wasn't normal. Shepard almost ran to his side. "Easy, Kai. Were you having a nightmare?"

His brown eyes were unfocused. He kept touching her face. "Yes, a nightmare. I'd dream that you and Butterfly weren't real. And when I couldn't find you... I'm a whinny idiot."

"Well, you're whinny sometimes. But never an idiot." She comforted him in her way. "I'm here, Kai. And Butterfly is very real."

But he still held her, as if he didn't yet believe it. "I'm sorry. I should be stronger. But I guess I can't stand the thought of losing you, both of you."

"It's alright." She understood him completely. Softly, she caressed his face as she touched his forehand with hers. "I can't lose either of you too. You're my reason to fight. I would save the galaxy so you could live safely."

"I love you, Amala." He kissed her as they sat on the bed. Her smaller frame was on his lap. It had been sometime until he broke contact. "And please, next time you get up wake me."

Her death hurt both of them, Shepard knew. And her near death experience on Rannoch brought those memories back.

"I promise." She whispered.

Kaidan smiled and kissed her again. When he broke the kiss, she heard him murmur something that sounded like Ashley's name.

"What did you just say?"

"Did I say it out loud?" It sounded like he was talking to himself, however. "I just... well, you know. Sometimes I think about Ash and Virmire. If she hadn't... She gave me the chance to hold you and have Butterfly. I owe her eternal gratitude."

Involuntary, Shepard gulped. "You said thanks Ash?"

_Aunty Ash said, you're welcome._

"Yes, I did. What's wrong Amala? You look pale."

She was going to faint. This was another evidence that proved Butterfly wasn't insane or a liar. But it was still hard to believe in what she didn't understand even the slightest.

"Kai, you said something about Blue butterfly. I don't understand it. Please explain it to me."

That question would come sooner or later. The Major wasn't surprised. He told Shepard about his strange dream and his suspicion.

"Had you ever watched 'Ghost in the Shell' or 'the Matrix'?"

Shepard shook her head. "I have no idea what they are. But knowing you, they probably are sci-fi movies."

"They're old but classics. Humans haven't made good sci-fi movies since the end of the Contact War. I still have a copy. Perhaps we can find some free time to watch them together."

_Here we go again,_ she sighed. Kaidan would keep talking about his passionate hobby all day if she didn't stop him.

"Maybe another time. Now tell me about your theory."

"Oh, yeah. Ghost in the Shell is a Japan anime. The plot is about the day most people became cyborgs. Their consciousness or ghost, was able to move from shell to shell."

"Shell...?" _Didn't Butterfly say something like that before?_

"I mean the body. It probably sounds strange, but the Buddhist believe sometimes our consciousness is able to leave our body. And the Matrix had shared similar concepts. In that movie, most of the humans lived in the virtual world while their bodies were preserved and used as batteries."

"They're movies." Shepard rolled her eyes.

"I know. But they gave me an idea." The man protested.

"What idea, exactly? That our daughter is the chosen one?"

"No." Sighing, he really hated arguing with his girlfriend. "I believe Butterfly's ghost can travel through time and space, without a TARDIS however. There's no other explanation."

If she believed that kind of thing, of course. "I was trained by a Buddhist monk when I was young. He didn't tell me about any of this."

"Probably because he thought it was a waste of time."

Shepard smacked him. "I'm not that stupid!"

Kaidan couldn't help but laugh. He held her tighter until she couldn't hit him again.

"You're not stupid. But you would never believe him. Even after everything, you still don't believe me or Butterfly, right?"

For a good long while, she just rested on his chest, thinking. "I believe B isn't losing her mind. What you said is making sense but I'm still skeptical."

"I know. It hard to believe in what you don't understand. Well, Butterfly would tell us if we ask, I'm sure."

When he mentioned it, Shepard knew she ought to apology to Butterfly. She detached herself from his arms quickly. "I should talk with B."

She didn't tell him, but Kaidan was sure the mother and child had an argument again. "Do you need backup? Butterfly can be more stubborn than you and me sometimes."

"She is stubborn but not unreasonable. And I deserve anything she might throw at me. I'll call you if I need help."

They kissed one last time before Shepard left to see their daughter. Kaidan looked at her leave. His gut told him this wasn't going to end well.

* * *

Sorry for delay. I got a new job and moved to new apartment. It's a busy week.

As always thank The Lonely Traveler for the beta.


	45. Mimic

"A wonderful fact to reflect upon, that every human creature is constituted to be that profound secret and mystery to every other."

―_Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities_

* * *

**Mimic**

* * *

Similar to the majority of the Citadel, Huerta Memorial Hospital was quiet and peaceful. Kolyat lost track of time as he was sitting near his father's bed, reading his prayer book.

Resting on the bed, Thane was listening to his son. The wounds he received in the fight against Kai Leng were not mortal but his syndrome kept him in bed. Still, he couldn't be more thankful for the extra time with his son. Without Butterfly's help, he wouldn't be here.

The door hissed open. Kolyat looked up from his book to see the newcomer only to jump from his chair.

"Good afternoon." The wavy haired woman greeted him with a wide smile.

It had been sometime, but she looked more beautiful than ever. Her eyes were shining like amber and her hair was almost sparkling. The drell felt like she brought the sun with her.

Suddenly, he felt thirsty. Kolyat cleared his throat but the words didn't come out until his dad coughed.

"Good afternoon, Atma." The older drell greeted. "Please do not mind Kolyat. His tongue ties every time he sees a beautiful woman."

If the drell was able to blush, the young Krios would be red. Butterfly's adorable giggle didn't make help matters. She was even more beautiful when she giggled.

"Father, I am not...!"

But all he could see at the moment was Atma. The third person didn't exist until someone cleared his throat.

"Care to introduce your friend, Princess?" Said James in a threatening tone.

He was standing behind his Princess, staring at the drell. Kolyat wasn't sure how he missed the sight of this big human.

"We never had a proper introduction. But I think you're Thane's son and your name is Kolyat, am I right?"

A beautiful voice for a beautiful face. "Yes, you're right. My name is Kolyat. What's yours?"

"Everyone calls me Butterfly. But sometimes my parents call me Butterfly Ashley Shepard-Alenko. That's quite a mouthful, I think."

"Shepard... You're Commander Shepard's daughter?"

"And I..." James shoved his hand between the two. "Am lieutenant James Vega. Nice to meet you."

This was awkward, to say the least. Although Kolyat never received full assassin training, he knew the look in the other man's eyes. They were shouting: _Back off, pal!_

Thane observed with great interest as his son took that hand, and shook it hard. They were both looked in a private battle over Butterfly's affections.

"Nice to meet you too, lieutenant Vega."

Drell's skin could cause an unpleasant feeling to a human's skin. The big guy felt a tickling sensation in his hand but didn't let go, not until Garrus shoved him off the way.

"Go fight outside, boys. This is a hospital and someone still wants to see her friend."

Of course. That's why they were here in the first place.

"I'll be outside." Knowing he would cause trouble, James excused himself.

Butterfly shook her head, obviously not understanding the situation. But Garrus and Tali gently pushed her toward Thane, so she didn't say anything to the lieutenant.

"Glad to see you Garrus." The older drell smiled. "And Tali, I had heard you are an Admiral now."

"Glad to see you as well, Thane." Tali replied. She wasn't exactly close to the ex-assassin, but they were still comrades.

"I heard you were ill. But I can't see anything wrong." The turian said. He, too, didn't know much about the drell. He accompanied Butterfly to visit Thane just to protect the girl. The only one who was close to the drell was Shepard.

Truth be told, he thought Shepard would leave Kaidan for the drell. But the Commander loved her LT too much.

"My illness is inside my body, Garrus." Thane paused to cough. Kolyat had to help him drink the medicine. "And I know my time is near."

The man had already accepted his fate, Garrus realized. Soothing words wouldn't do in this situation. "Just don't leave now, ok? Shepard is in the other room. She promised to come see you later."

"The other room? Is she ill too?"

"No." Butterfly scratched the back of her head. "Mommy and daddy are talking with Dr. Michel... about my condition."

"Atma, are you alright?" Although he was the one who was in a patient's bed, Thane still worried about the girl. He sensed that she was or would be a very important person.

Butterfly tried to smile, but still sighed. "On Rannoch, I pushed myself too hard. Neither Grandma Karen nor Dr. Michel found any damage, but they can't guarantee I will fully recover. And mommy forbade me from going on other missions. But I want to help. I hate waiting on the Normandy, doing nothing like some kind of burden."

"Oh, come on. Don't be so miserable." Garrus patted her shoulder. "No one thinks you're a burden. You always keep our spirits high. That's important too."

The girl smiled and hugged him. After that, they enjoyed spent time talking. It felt like only a few minutes passed until Butterfly's parents joined them.

However, the visiting hours had ended. They had to leave. The family invited Kolyat for dinner. He hesitated but Butterfly insisted.

"Come with us, Kolyat. It will be fun having dinner with you."

When was the last time he had dinner with someone? The drell couldn't remember. The family that took him in after his mother's death was so kind, but he always felt alone. And that's why he loathed his father so much for so long.

"You are so kind, Princess."

There was a hint of blush on her cheeks. "Princess?"

"Lieutenant Vega calls you that. I think it suits you."

Her smile became wider. "That's a nickname my daddy calls me. James probably got the idea from him."

Kaidan cleared his throat. That was enough to make the young drell jump. "Let's move, Princess. Aunty Liara is waiting."

Butterfly grabbed Kolyat's wrist. And he made no resistance to the contact.

* * *

Liara was waiting for them at Apollo's. In the evening, the Presidium common was quiet. The Normandy crew felt like the place was closed off just for them.

There was a surprise when the waitress introduced herself as Liara's father. Matriarch Aethyta and Shepard had met on Illium, but the human had no idea she was related to one of her best friends.

And she was half-krogan. That was quite colorful.

"More dessert, honey?" Matriarch Aethyta asked Butterfly. The asari simply fell for the girl at first sight. She enjoyed serving Butterfly like a grandmother trying to butter her grandchild up.

And just like a normal girl, Butterfly had a sweet tooth. She finished her third cup of ice cream but was still able to eat some more.

_She really has a biotic's appetite, _Kaidan thought.

"Yes, please. Thanks grandma." The girl pleaded.

The asari pecked her cheek. Most old women loved children. Aethyta wasn't an exception.

Shepard leaned on her chair, looking around the table. The Apollo had every kind of food. Kaidan, Garrus, Tali, Liara, James, and Kolyat were able to have dinner in the same table although the turian and quarian were dextro-protein races.

They seemed content, so was she. In fact, Shepard hadn't eaten this much since... before Alchera. Warmness and a full stomach always felt good, although her mind was still busy.

Her talk with Butterfly wasn't great, but not bad either. She apologized and the girl forgave. Shepard began to believe in Butterfly's ability, but she still doubted the reincarnation aspect.

Still, a full check-up didn't hurt. They went straight to the hospital as soon as the Normandy docked. Kaidan had to convince Butterfly to cooperate, though. Garrus, Tali, and James accompanied them just to be safe. None of them thought the Citadel was safe for Butterfly.

_I hate it that The Illusive Man is still a thorn in my side, _Shepard thought angrily.

She felt a warm hand on hers. Shepard looked up at her boyfriend. Somehow he always knew when she felt troubled. Back to the time when they were chasing Saren, he was always there when she needed someone to rely on.

_Forget Horizon._ She told herself. _That wouldn't do any good._

"You two remind me of my youth." The matriarch chuckled. When the two released each other's hand, she smiled slyly.

"Father," Liara warned. She knew what was coming.

"I just think they're adorable, just like me and Benezia. Groping under tables, stolen kisses, quick fu..."

"Father!" The young asari shouted. "By the goddess, please don't say that in front of Butterfly!"

The father shrugged. "It can be a nice education, girl. Since she already has two handsome guys chasing after her, it's only a matter of time before one of them finds his way to her..."

"Stop!" The whole crew yelled. James already pink and Kolyat was thinking about hiding under the table while Shepard covered Butterfly's ears with her hands.

"She is younger than you think, father." Liara slapped her forehead.

"And she isn't going to date anyone soon." Kaidan added. He glared at the two guys threateningly.

As if she didn't understand their reaction, the matriarch sighed, "You human have a short-lifespan. Why do you have to wait?"

"Just because we have a short life doesn't mean we have to... mate as soon as possible." The Major tried to reason. "There are other things more interesting than sex."

Shepard coughed.

"Easy, young man." Aethyta winked. She just enjoyed toying with him. "I'm both a mother and a father. I know how you feel. But you have to understand that you can't keep your child with you forever. She has to have her own life."

It was sad, but true. Kaidan had to accept it. "I didn't say she can't have a... boyfriend or girlfriend. It's just not now. My princess is still too young."

"You heard the man, boys." Garrus leaned in his chair. After enduring tasteless dextro-rations for months, a decent meal and drink made him laid back a bit. He almost sounded sleepy.

James was going to respond but a ping from his Omni-tool stopped him. "Shit, I forgot I have to pick up new mods from the shop. Are you ok if I leave, Lola?"

"We have a General, Admiral, and a powerful broker with us. Matriarch Aethyta is also an ex-asari commando..."

"And half-krogan," Aethyta added.

Shepard rolled her eyes. "Yes, she is half-krogan. The Illusive Man better think twice if he wants to try kidnapping Butterfly again."

The drell was shocked by the news but suddenly realized that Butterfly didn't need sympathy. In fact, she was good enough to best Kai Leng, so she probably didn't need a protector. And since he wasn't an assassin like his father, the best he could do was try not to be a burden for her.

"I might not be as capable as my father, but if is there anything I can help..."

"It's alright Kolyat. This is just a precaution." Shepard tried to reassure him and mostly herself.

Looking at them, James grunted in disapproval. Everyone seemed to prefer the drell to him.

Clueless, Butterfly waved at him. "See you later, James."

The lieutenant just nodded.

* * *

Unlike the Presidium, the lower ward was busy during the night cycle, especially in the market. The place was noisy, a lot of lights, and a bit disorientating, but James thought it was better then the other parts of the Citadel.

People here seemed lively. The atmosphere wasn't so fake. He liked to spend his time here.

However, he didn't have time today. James picked the package from the vendor and headed back to the Normandy.

On his way to docking bay 24, the lieutenant found a group of thugs surrounding a young woman. James could only see her behind. She was definitely calm, but he knew something wasn't right.

"Come with us, sweet, and we'll show you a good time." A man placed his hand on her shoulder.

James heard a snap and then the guy screamed. As he fell to his knees with pain, the lieutenant saw the man's right wrist twist as if was boneless.

The other men jumped away. However, they were not smart enough to run. The thugs circled around the woman, trying to take her down. One dirty bastard tried to grab her neck from behind but she dodged. James almost dropped the package in shock when she spun around.

That face... It was Butterfly's. But what the hell was she doing here? And where did she get that outfit? The Major would never approve of those heels and that tight leather dress.

She looked good, though.

Butterfly kicked the man who dared try to grab her, sending him flying towards the other side of the market. Another man took that opportunity to hurl towards her but she grabbed his arm and then spun him in the opposite direction. A loud crack of broken joints reminded the lieutenant about how deadly the Shepard women were.

Although he knew she could handle these stupid thugs, he also knew that Shepard would be mad if he didn't do something. James jumped into the fray, knocked some idiots down as Butterfly threw the rest with biotics.

When it was said and done with, she turned to him. Those brown eyes glared at him in obvious surprise.

But before she could say anything, C-Sec guards ran to the scene. If they knew Commander Shepard's daughter made this mess, the press would jump at them like vultures. Faster than his thought, he grabbed Butterfly and ran.

They didn't stop until they reached the upper ward. But that was because her high-heels didn't cooperate and one of the heels broke. Butterfly almost fell on her face if James hadn't caught her.

"When did you get these shoes? They look good on you but not comfortable." He didn't mean to make it sound offensive, but she shot him a dagger glare anyway.

She tried to save her grace, walking without his support. But every step she took made her groan in pain. James sighed, annoyed by her stubbornness, before lifting her up bridal style.

Still not saying a thing, Butterfly glared at him fiercely.

"Don't look at me like that, Princess. I do this because your mommy would kill me if I let you hurt yourself. Well, I know a clinic here. Let's get you patched up."

She kept looking at the floor as if she was looking for something. Even after the good doctor patched her ankle, she still didn't say anything.

"You aren't so chatty today, Princess?" Asked James. He was worried.

Butterfly paid the doc for the service and tried to walk away, but the lieutenant grabbed her wrist.

"Where are you going? You shouldn't go anywhere alone. Cerberus is looking for you..."

As those brown eyes were glaring at him, and he felt like he did something wrong. Butterfly looked hurt. Her eyes wet as if she was going to cry.

"Hey," He didn't know what he done wrong but he didn't want to see her cry. James rubbed her cheek gently with his free hand. "Don't cry. Tears don't suit your beautiful face."

_Oops, did I just say that?_

She smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. Her hand touched his cheek softly, hesitantly. The entire time, she wet her lips and her eyes looked at his lips.

_What should I do if she kissed me?_ James asked himself. Lola and Major Alenko would kick him off the Normandy if they knew he kissed their daughter. However, Butterfly would probably kick his ass if he denied her.

Luckily (or not), he didn't have to make the decision. Butterfly broke the contact before anything actually happened. She looked ashamed and sad.

"Princess?" That question came out before his brain could process it.

This time, the answer was a pull. The girl pulled him down to her mouth. It was clumsy, and slobbery. It was like a kiss of an inexperienced teenager. She didn't know how to use her tongue or how to avoid crushing their teeth. However, her innocence was alluring. The sweet taste of her made James' head spin.

At first, he just stood still in shock, but quickly threw caution into the wind and kissed back. Not long after, Butterfly turned red all over. Her body melted to his embrace like jelly.

Sweetest jelly he had ever tasted.

This was wrong, forbidden, and crazy. But James couldn't bring himself to care as long as she was still here. Her innocence was intoxicating. He couldn't stop drinking it.

Time flew. It felt like an eternity until they had to stop for a breath. However, he didn't wait too long. James lowered his lips to meet hers again but suddenly felt a pang at his neck.

His world spun around in slow motion. The lieutenant tried to stay strong but his legs disobeyed. He fell like a sack of grain but still conscious. Though his eyelids were heavy, he saw a mystery woman slap Butterfly.

That's... strange. His princess was as fierce as her mommy. She would never let anyone hurt her without fighting back.

Different outfit, strange behavior... No, this woman wasn't Butterfly.

And that was everything he knew before his world went dark.

* * *

The big guy had got himself into trouble. Fear not, I won't kill him.

And this is a long way. I have to thank The Lonely Traveler for keeping up with me. Thank to my reader, reviewer and follower. I love you all. However, I always starve for review. Please give me suggestion, comment or anything. Every comment fulfill my imagination. Thank. :D


	46. Succubus

"The greatest deception men suffer is from their own opinions."

― Leonardo da Vinci

* * *

**Succubus**

* * *

Something soft, warm, and very naked snuggled on his chest. James sighed, inhaling the sweet scent from the smooth skin and then held her tighter.

Vanilla and a hint of something flowery... This must be heaven.

_Wait... What happened last night?_

Abruptly, he jerked awake but wasn't able to get up. The lieutenant looked down at the object in his arms as his brain tried to process the situation. He couldn't remember what he had done last night or their location. The last thing he remembered was a terrible headache and...

...the kiss.

The woman stirred, bringing his attention back to her. That small face was hidden beneath her smooth silky hair. James held his breath as he gently tucked that raven wavy lock off her face.

_Holy shit... Lola is going to kill me!_

Perhaps she felt when his body stiffened. After a satisfied sigh, the young woman in his arms finally opened her eyes. James' heart almost stopped as he was waiting for her reaction. It could be worse if she woke up crying or screaming.

Those beautiful brown eyes looked at his face dreamily. A soft smile on her lips as her hand trailed along the tattoo on his chest.

He knew that look. She was beaming, radiant like she just... had sex.

_I hope Lola will make it quick and painless._

But... something wasn't right. As he looked into those eyes, the things he saw before he lost his consciousness came back to him.

"Who are you?"

Abruptly, the smile disappeared from that beautiful face. "You know?"

A pang of pain snapped in his chest. Her voice was similar to Butterfly's but harsher and lighter. It sounded like she rarely used her voice. And when she talked, it sounded like she was hurting.

She tried to escape his embrace, but James rolled them over. He was on top, trying to ignore the delicious friction.

_If this is Butterfly,_ James thought, _she would headbutt me. _But Butterfly's twin didn't do it. So he was sure this wasn't his Princess.

"I don't want to hurt you, Damita. Just answer my question and I'll let you go." He tried to look threatening but wasn't successful. Although she was just glaring at him, it made him feel terrible for talking to her like that.

This little lady was like a gloomier version of Butterfly. Her eyes were sad and softer... her voice sounded like a wounded animal.

"N... no." Said the woman. "No can do."

"Let me guess. Cerberus sent you, right?" He knew what would happen to Cerberus' agents if they got caught. "Your head will explode if you say anything."

"No." She shook her head, still saying the same word as if it was a mantra.

This little lady was tougher than she looked, James sighed. "Look, I'm with the Alliance. I can help you from Cerberus. But you have to tell me something, your name at least."

"Have no name." The answer came with a small sob.

His heart was stuck in his throat. She didn't shed tears, but couldn't suppress the sob. That made him feel terrible for causing it.

"What do you mean you have no name?"

"No one cares." She said with a sigh.

"Wait... You mean- no one cared enough to name you, right?"

With a sad smile, she nodded.

Damn, this little thing was more trouble than he thought. James sighed. He was a soldier. They trained him to ready for interrogation and to interrogate the captured, but he had no idea how to handle a broken girl.

A single tear fell down her cheek. The lieutenant panicked.

"Hey, it's alright. Just... What if I call you Damita? It means little lady." Butterfly didn't like it when someone mentioned her size. He hoped this woman would be different.

Despite their position, she smiled. "Like it."

That distracted him. James almost forgot what he had planned to do. "I'm... at your service. Well, can I ask where did you come from?"

"Cloning,"

"What?" That was unexpected.

"Test subject." And now he noticed her speech. Damita spoke in broken sentences. As if she didn't know how to form full sentence. "Guinea pig. No one cares."

No one taught her to speak properly, James realized. He slowly got up and gently pulled her up. "It's alright. You're safe now."

But she shook her head. "No."

"I'll protect you." The lieutenant said it before thinking. "No one will harm you again. I promise."

"Thanks, but no." She cried. "Hope this real."

"What do you mean?"

On his lap, she leaned closer and kissed him softly. James tasted salty tears in his mouth.

"Wake up."

* * *

James stirred, waking up.

The pain in the back of his head was proof enough. He slowly opened his eyes and found himself in a familiar place.

The med bay... On the Normandy.

_It was only a dream._ That was... He wasn't sure if he felt relief or regret. The dream felt very real. Her scent still lingered in his nose. And her taste...

"Good to see you awake, lieutenant." The good doctor came to his view. "How are you feeling?"

His eyelids were too heavy and the light hurt him, so James closed his eyes again as he tried to pull himself together. "My head hurts, but not so bad."

After all the years of working with marines, Chakwas could tell when they lied to her. She shot James a dagger glare as if he was her child. "Don't lie to your doctor, lieutenant. It's not good for your health."

There was no use arguing with granny Chakwas. James gave up. "It hurts like hell, Doc. And my stomach is feeling funny." Suddenly, he jerked up, covered his mouth with his hands. Chakwas knew that look so she handed him a spittoon.

For almost five minutes, the lieutenant vomited until his stomach emptied. Still, his head spun like a merry go round.

"I found a sedative in your blood. You will feel its effects for the next few hours. Better sleep until your system gets rid of the drug altogether. If you can't sleep, I'll give you a sedative."

James looked at Chakwas' giant syringe and couldn't help but wonder if she knew his unholy thoughts about Butterfly and wanted to teach him a lesson. With technology nowadays, they shouldn't need a needle that big any more, right?

"I'll sleep it off." He refused quickly.

"Good. Medicine always has side effects. Better to not use it too often."

But he had more questions. "Wait, doc. Can I ask you something?"

"Make it quick, lieutenant. I still have to check on Butterfly."

"Butterfly is sick?" That didn't sound good.

"She got food poisoning. I'm not sure if she had a food allergy or just ate too much ice cream. C-Sec officers brought you back and helped with Butterfly."

Oh, right. He was knocked out when he was in the Upper ward. James remembered. "I owe them one."

"I think that made you both even. Officer Uri said you and Commander Shepard saved her life before." Chakwas suggested. "And that's why she knows who you were and brought you here instead of sending you to a hospital."

"Uri? Oh, I remember that chick. Wait... She's here? Sparks probably won't be happy about it."

"Sparks?"

"I mean the quarian Admiral. She is... Sparks. You know. Her eyes are... sparking."

The old woman chuckled. She knew the young lieutenant came up with nicknames. "I know what you mean, James. They're... Well, our young Admiral tries not to act so obvious but doesn't succeed. She was jealous when Garrus talked to the officer."

He almost regretted not seeing that. All the time, those lovebirds pretended it was a fling, but he knew better.

"I hope Cripple recorded that footage. I wonder if Scars could sweat."

"Talking about sweating. I found something interesting in your system." The good doctor activated her Omni-tool and ran the program. James saw the diagrams and numbers but he didn't understand a thing.

"I hope it doesn't mean I'm going to die."

"No, you're fine. I think you're more than that. My scanner found your endorphin level spike in between your sleep."

"Endorphin, the happy hormone?"

"Yes, it is. It is produced by the pituitary gland in vertebras during exercise, excitement, pain, consumption of spicy food, and orgasm." Chakwas said without hesitation.

James' brain was lost when she talked about the gland, but the word 'orgasm' kicked his ears. "Orgasm! You mean..?"

"It was a hell of good dream, I bet." She pointed at his pants.

He followed her eyes. As he saw what happened, he wanted to jump out the airlock.

"If you don't have more questions, I suggest you clean yourself, and get some sleep. And if you hear strange noises from the women's restroom, it's Butterfly."

He could try teasing the Princess with her 'lack of grace' state, but Lola and the Major would kick his ass. So James thought he better take a bath and go straight to his bunk.

Truth be told, he wasn't sure if he was able to look into Butterfly's eyes after that kiss. Well, it wasn't her. He knew that. But he also knew he kissed that woman back because he thought she was Butterfly.

Sighing, the lieutenant would investigate that woman and his attacker after his head stopped spinning.

* * *

It felt like a few minutes after he closed his eyes but the clock on his nightstand said he slept for three hours.

Carefully, he sat up and was glad the ship didn't spin. His stomach stopped groaning. It seemed the doctor was right.

"James," EDI called him.

The lieutenant automatically looked for her body but suddenly realized the AI was talking to him via the terminal. He forgot that she was also the ship AI. "Yes, EDI. Do you have anything for me?"

"Shepard wanted me to inform her when you were ready to talk to her. Are you in condition for the conversation now?"

Shepard wasn't a patient person, especially when someone hurt her crew. Realizing it or not, mommy Shepard always looked after her crew as if they were her children. James thought it might be rude if he dismissed her.

"I'm ready whenever she is."

It did not take long before the Commander came to see him in the male dormitory. Judging from her expression, James couldn't help but wonder if she was going to interrogate him.

"How's your head?" She dragged a chair from the table in middle of the room and sat down on it. Shepard wasn't going anywhere soon.

"Perfectly fine. We can dance if you don't believe me."

"Right now? You can't even walk straight, James." Blunt, the Commander wasn't a sweet talker.

"Just give me a gun and something to shoot and I'll be as good as new." He insisted.

"Men," Shepard rolled her eyes. "Alright. Then tell me what happened. Officer Uri said they found you in the upper ward, but no one knew what happened to you."

"You're kidding me? There are hundreds of security cameras in the upper ward but they didn't catch anything."

"Someone planted a virus into the Citadel server. It disabled every camera in the area." Kaidan joined them. He still had a data pad in hand. "If you ask me, I think someone set this up to get you."

"Get me? Why? I'm not important." He was just a soldier. Why would anyone want to dispose of him?

"Your guess is good as mine. Perhaps we can presume more if we know your side of story." The Major said calm. He was very patient.

But James still hesitated. "Would you guys believe me if I told you I found someone who... looks very much similar to Butterfly?"

Butterfly's parents exchanged a stare. They hadn't told the crew about Butterfly's clones. Still, they didn't expect to hear about Persis either. The girl and Arachne just disappeared after Cerberus' assault on the Citadel failed.

"Can you start at the beginning, James?" Asked Shepard.

The lieutenant had no choice but to tell them the truth. However, he avoided the racy details. "I was trying to talk to that woman when someone stabbed me in the back. And then I couldn't move. The last thing I saw was her slapped by another woman. I can't remember anything after that."

The couple eyed him suspiciously. James wasn't a good liar and they weren't stupid.

"You're not a rookie, James. How could you lose your guard like that?"

_Dios, this isn't good._ "I was... I thought she was Butterfly. And I worry about her... safety too."

They seemed to buy it, or were simply too concerned about other things to think about his strange behavior. Shepard decided to tell him. "Cerberus cloned Butterfly from her dead embryo. But, they also created spares."

Spares? Plural number... "There's more than one spare? Dios, this galaxy is done for..."

The parents frowned. But it was Kaidan who responded. "Those are my daughters you're talking about. I barely know Persis and Dino, but they are my girls same as Butterfly."

"Sorry, Major." It's very unwise to insult your CO's daughters. "Me and my big mouth. I'm really sorry."

"I wonder if the girl James found was Persis." Shepard cut them off. "She is too valuable to be used as bait. TIM's maybe insane, but he's not stupid."

But James thought about another thing entirely. "Wait. You said that woman was Persis. Is that her name?"

"Not exactly. Cerberus didn't give them a name. They call our trio by code."

"And you haven't named them either."

_No one cares._ James swallowed hard as he thought about the woman in his dream. Persis was a spare. No one really cared for her.

Shepard wanted to argue, but she couldn't deny the truth. Persis and Dino both were her daughters and she loved them, but they weren't close to her heart like Butterfly.

"Her name is Alita." Kaidan protested. "Alita and Stellar. I named them after my cousins who died during the Reaper's invasion. Sorry I didn't tell you, Amala. I didn't want to trouble you."

"Nonsense. They are our daughters." Forgetting the situation, Shepard grabbed his hand.

James cleared his throat. "Get a room."

"Oh, come on. I'm not going to screw him in front of you. Why does everyone have to act like that when we... hold hands or...?"

"It's uncomfortable." The young man cut her off. "You two are so in love. It makes my skin crawl."

Shepard pouted, but Kaidan laughed and pulled her to his arms. "Let's return to our subject before we forget. You were drugged and then left in the ward. Did they take anything from you?"

"I lost my mod and credit chit but I don't think that's what they wanted. Cerberus aren't plain bandits. They wouldn't be after a simple mod and some money."

_The boy is smarter than he gives himself credit._ Kaidan chuckled. "If the woman you saw was Alita, I think I know who was behind this."

"You don't mean..." Shepard huffed. "That bitch. "

"TIM is a mastermind, but he doesn't like to play with his targets. That crazy hag does." The Major didn't like saying that name too.

Suddenly, the atmosphere changed. James didn't understand anything. "Whoa, what are you talking about? Care to explain?"

Kaidan sighed. He still felt bad every time he talked about that crazy bitch and the Lamia station.

"Her name is Arachne Folic. She is a Cerberus agent and was in charge of the Pragia and Caterpillar projects. Trust me. If you thought Jack was crazy, wait until you meet this Arachne."

"And she ordered Persis... I mean Alita, to kill her own dad." Shepard added furiously.

"She did... What?"

They told James everything. At first, the lieutenant couldn't believe it. But coming from Shepard and the Major, he had to believe them.

"This is loco. Commanded the girl to kill her own father... That woman is insane. And sorry about Stellar."

"It's fine. Now, we have other problems at hand. Why did they target you if they didn't want to take you?"

_That was an interesting question._

"If they didn't want to take you... perhaps they wanted to give you something." Shepard presumed. It didn't sound possible however.

The guys were stunned. They stared at her, making her nervous.

"I'm just saying."

But Kaidan had already grabbed James collar. "Take your clothes off, James."

"Whoa, I didn't know you had an interest in me! Can't we wait until we're alone?" The lieutenant teased.

Kaidan rolled his eyes. "I just think that woman might have planted a tracker in your clothes. Then again, since she is a doctor, she might have injected a probe in you."

"But Dr. Chakwas didn't find anything..." the younger man protested.

"It wouldn't be easy to find if you don't know what you are looking for. Besides, the probe could be very tiny. I'll tell her to run a scan for a probe or anything suspicious."

"Better to be safe than sorry. Follow the order, lieutenant." Shepard said.

"Which order, taking my clothes off or going to see Dr. Chakwas?"

If he wanted to make her blush, he failed. "What about taking your clothes off and then going to see Chakwas? You can change to another outfit or just walk out naked. I don't mind."

James made a face while Kaidan tried to suppress his laugh. The Major knew the boy was just talk, no action.

"Alright, I'll change. Just give me a few minutes." He grabbed his spare clothes and walked to the men's restroom.

Kaidan whispered something into Shepard's ear. She blushed and smacked him on his shoulder.

* * *

First of all, I can't end this chapter without thank The Lonely Traveler for beta. I can't go this far without her.

second: I thank Abionastar50 for review. And sorry for cliffhanger. I just couldn't help it. :) And thank to the other readers as well.


	47. Blast from the past

_"As for omens, there is no such thing as an omen. Destiny does not send us heralds. She is too wise or too cruel for that."_

― Oscar Wilde, The Picture of Dorian Gray

* * *

**Blast from the Past**

* * *

She was the Shadow Broker, Liara kept telling herself that. Although she recently took the title, she worked hard to be the best information broker. She believed she knew everything about spying.

But she was terribly wrong.

The thing Dr. Chakwas found beneath James' skin was a nano-bot. It was very tiny, only a few millimeters long. It was too small for Chakwas' scan to detect. It was pure luck she found it.

James got a rash after he shook hands with Kolyat. When Chakwas applied medi-gel on his hand, she noticed a tiny bump. Arachne injected the nano-bot into the lieutenant while he was unconscious. She left a tiny hole on the back of his hand, almost unnoticeable.

And now, Glyph was analyzing it. Liara had to know how it worked. This bot could be useful in her line of work and she had to know a way to counter it.

She would never be the true Shadow Broker if Cerberus still had an upper hand on her.

The droid finished its job with a long beep. "This bot is not the probe, Dr. T'Soni. It did not send coordinates or other information out. It contains a message. I can upload it to your terminal."

"A message? Upload it, Glyph."

With a beep, the message loaded to her terminal.

Shepard

If you're reading this, you're not stupid as I thought. And since you're a clever little girl, you deserve a prize.

Someone is coming after you. Surprise? That's nothing new for you, of course. I'm really taking pity on your little girl. Her mother is endangering her family. This time, you pissed some people off and they will stop at nothing until you die and they don't care who they kill in their path.

Don't ever think I sent this warning because I care about your welfare. I just want to see your face when I kill your boyfriend. Next time I'll make sure he really is dead.

A.

This A person was obviously Arachne Folic. She sent an invisible message through James and half expected they would not find it. Kaidan was right. This woman loved to play games. Sick kind of games.

But who were the people after Shepard? Liara had the feeling they were neither Cerberus nor batarians. From the way Arachne said it, they were new enemies.

She needed more information.

A beep interrupted her thoughts. She looked around and Glyph informed her. "The task is completed, Dr. T'soni."

"The task? What task?"

"You ordered me to decrypt the data we savaged from the Lamia station's server. The task is done. There's a lot of data involving a Prothean. Also more information on Project Caterpillar."

"Wait, there's more information we don't know about that project?" Her gut told her it was about to get worse.

"Yes, doctor. This sector has been decrypted and was not included in the other file because it's the data on Mati." The droid showed her a hologram of the schematic of the biotic amp and implant.

No one ever took that amp off Butterfly's head, so they had never seen its detail. This schematic showed her everything.

As she read it, Liara's knees went numb. This thing wasn't only a redesigned version of the L2, but it was the combination of new technology and...

"Dr. T'Soni, ETA Eden Prime in fifty minutes." EDI informed her via intercom.

"Thanks EDI." That was all she managed to reply. Her mind was blank. How could she tell Shepard about her discovery?

* * *

The shuttle landed smoothly on the shuttle bay. As soon as the Commander and Major stepped out from it, their daughter greeted them. Butterfly hugged Liara, Garrus, and Tali but James walked away before she could welcome him back properly.

Something wasn't right. The turian knew it but didn't say anything. Whatever happened was the boy's business, he shouldn't get involved.

Another passenger distracted them all with an angry shout.

"Human, why did you lie to me?" A strange looking alien stormed off the shuttle. His four eyes sweeping around angrily, looking for something. He ignored the young human completely.

Shepard rolled her eyes. "It's Commander. And I never lied to you."

"You told me I am the only survivor." The four-eyed man huffed. "But I sense another of my people."

"What?" Everyone asked in harmony.

"Who is this guy?" Butterfly asked Liara, frowning.

The couple looked at each other, completely confused. At the same time, Garrus gently pulled the girl to stand behind him.

"The Reapers enslaved the surviving Prothean and turned them to the creatures we call the Collectors. But you might say they're as good as dead." Liara told him although she didn't exactly understand the question.

"I know the Reapers turned my people against us. They were emptied, soulless, but the one I am sensing is still alive."

Everyone began to wonder if this ancient creature had lost his mind. But the asari very interested in what he said. "You sense? What does that mean?"

"All life provides clues for those who can read them. It is in your cells, DNA. Experience is a biological maker." The last Prothean said expressionless. "And I can sense my people. Her presence is blurred but I am sure she is here."

"Wait," Shepard stopped him. "You read my physiology when I touched you on Eden Prime so you can understand us, right? Can't you read me again and see if I lied to you or not?"

"Not a good idea." Kaidan stepped out to shield her from the Prothean. "It's a two way communication. You said you saw a vision when you touched him. It will probably hurt you like the vision from the beacon."

"The subordinate should listen to his commander officer, otherwise it's mutiny. In my cycle, this action called for death." The Prothean gave the response no one asked for.

"Uncle Garrus, is he ok?" Butterfly asked, still confused.

Somehow that brought the Prothean's attention to her. Four eyes blinked rapidly as he was walking around the young Shepard. "This is strange, indeed. I sense something familiar in you, but you are not my people."

"That's quite obvious." James murmured.

Liara thought about it for a moment. "I... I think I know."

Immediately, every eye turned to her.

"It's the Mati. I mean Butterfly's amp. Cerberus modified the original one with technology they found in the Collector's base. We know the Collector's once were Prothean, would it be possible that it's Prothean technology they found?"

"How could you know that?" Kaidan asked.

"I... Glyph just finished decrypting the data we got from the Lamia station." The asari said, blushing. "I know it took so long."

Despite their relationship, Liara devoted everything for Shepard. Besides, she loved Butterfly so much. The Commander knew the asari would never neglect such an important task.

"It's alright, Liara. Tell me your theory, please?"

"Only one way to find out." Before anyone could react, the Prothean launched toward Butterfly and grabbed her arms.

The girl automatically shut her eyes and shook violently. As the memories rushed through him, the Prothean was taken aback and then stumbled off her.

Butterfly hated it when someone approached her too fast or too close. She almost activated the Annihilation Field but her mother pulled her into a hug to calm her down.

The Major wanted to yell at the ancient warrior, but the alien had already fallen to his knees, four eyes rolled back horribly.

No one knew what to do. They stared at the Prothean until KEI-9 nudged him with its fore legs. And then the four-eyed alien fell on his face, unconscious.

* * *

_When you don't know what to do, follow protocol._ For once, Liara agreed with the Alliance's motto.

While the Prothean was still unconscious, Chakwas checked his body before they carried him to Grunt's old quarter in the port cargo hold. Although they knew the Prothean wasn't the enemy, they didn't want to risk any problems.

It didn't take long till he woke up.

"How are you feeling?" Shepard asked. She offered her hand to help him get up but the Prothean looked away and stood up on his own.

"What was that thing?" Rudely, he spit. "It was full with... things, so much data. It was like a beacon but alive!"

"You mean... Butterfly is my daughter. She is human. Don't call her it!" He called her primitive and she could endure, but he couldn't call her girl an object. The Commander huffed.

"Are you sure she is human? In my cycle, asari and human were the most primitive races in galaxy. I cannot believe she can be so advanced."

"Advanced?"

"Perhaps advanced is not the right word." For the first time, the Prothean considered his words. "She is different. When I read her, I saw her as an image of the universe. There was much data, too complicated. I could not handle it all."

Shepard tilted her eyebrows. She didn't believe him, but when she thought back to the vision she saw on Tuchanka, she hesitated. She was tired of calling him the Prothean. "I almost forgot. It's almost been a day since I released you from stasis pod but I still don't know your name."

"It is Javik now. My title is no longer important."

"So Javik, you passed out because you couldn't handle... whatever is within my daughter?"

The Prothean nodded. "She is... extraordinary. I've never seen anything like this. But again, I was only a soldier. There were many things I did not know."

"Wait... You're a soldier. Does that mean you don't know anything about the Crucible?" Liara couldn't help asking. She and the Alliance scientists were trying to understand the Crucible's schematic but there were so many unknowns. When she knew the artifact Cerberus dug from Eden Prime's surface was a stasis pod with a living Prothean, she had hoped that he might be an intelligent scientist and help.

"The Crucible?" Four eyes blinked.

Suddenly, Liara felt nervous. "We found the schematic of a weapon your people invented. It could be our only hope to win this war, but we aren't sure how to finish it. I'd hoped you could help."

"Only thing I know about the weapon is we failed to finish it. So we planned to hide until the old machines returned to the dark space, and then rebuild our empire."

That was very disappointing. "So you don't know what the Catalyst is?"

The ancient alien nodded solemnly.

"Well, just out of curiosity. In case everything went according to your plan, what would have happened?" Shepard asked.

"You would have been given a choice join our empire or..."

"You would enslave us? Isn't that a little extreme?"

Javik was deep in thought for a moment as he tried to recall what he read from the Commander. "You found a beacon. You saw our destruction. If you were us, you would do anything to stop them, no matter its consequences."

Thinking back about Earth, Shepard rather understood him but it didn't mean she agreed. "My daughter would be too young to know. But she won't be innocent forever. One day she would have known and she would have hated me. I couldn't live with that."

"I... never had a family." Javik seemed sad, but he shook it off. "In the time I was born, my planet was already on fire. It was... desperate times."

"What about the beacon?" Kaidan still curious. "Wasn't it another plan of your people?"

"Yes. We sent a warning to the next cycle. You found one of them, but why did you not heed, not prepare for the Reapers, human?"

"Hah, it's my fault?" Shepard hissed in anger. Kaidan had to hold her hand to keep her still. "For the last time, it's Commander. And nobody understood your warning. Your beacon nearly killed me."

As if he didn't notice Shepard's reaction, the Prothean shook his head. "The communication in this cycle is still primitive."

"We pieced together what we could and used it to stop an invasion three years ago." Still, Liara tried patience.

"Then the extinction was delayed?" The Prothean wasn't happy about it, though.

_He thinks we have no chance._ The asari realized.

"The war isn't over yet. And we won't go down without a fight." Shepard protested. It wouldn't be easy, but she had her reason to fight.

"You believe you can win." It wasn't a question. "But I can sense turmoil in your voice."

"I'm only human, and the Reapers are enormous. I admit I fear them." She confessed. "But that doesn't matter. Although I don't know how to win, I won't give up. Unlike you, I have a family to protect or die trying."

Kaidan tightened his grip on her wrist. He didn't want to lose her again.

The Prothean looked at their intertwined hands, deep in thought. "In my cycle, people mated to create life. Love meant nothing for us. Perhaps that's why we were not strong enough."

"I saw your memory from the signals I found in those labs. You struggled to the best of your ability for your people. It's not all already lost. Your presence proves it."

Liara swore when she saw his lips arched in the form of small smile. It disappeared as soon as it happened.

"In my society, there were many 'Avatars', Protheans who embodied a single virtue for the society. I am Vengeance, the voice of dead people. Those who fight the Reapers are my allies. I will fight with you."

They saw he used his biotics when he woke up from a very long sleep. Shepard was sure they could use this guy. "Welcome aboard, Javik."

Still, the Prothean refused to shake her hand.

* * *

I think Javik isn't mean guy. In the cut scene, we saw he sad when his people died. The guy wasn't a jerk. He just too innocent. In the time of war, people could be selfish and cold. Javik probably didn't know how to cope with people nor show he care. Well, perhaps I'm too optimism.

By the way, I can't end this chapter with my gratitude to The Lonely Traveler, my beta. Awesome job as always.


	48. True love

_"There are only two mistakes one can make along the road to truth; not going all the way, and not starting."_

- Buddha

* * *

**True Love**

* * *

_What if life came with a manual to guide you to a perfect life?_

It would be the easier and safer way to live, but also the boring way. Jacob wasn't sure if he wanted to play safe living. For his entire life, he played dangerous games with dangerous people. He had done a lot of things he wasn't proud of but didn't regret.

Coming back from the suicide mission gave him another insight. He departed from Cerberus and The Illusive Man to find his purpose.

Everything comes with a price. Jacob finally found what he really wanted but The Illusive Man wasn't happy with him.

Especially after he helped a whole team of Ex-Cerberus' scientists escape.

"The censor detects shuttles are coming here." One of the scientists informed him. The guy didn't know how to fight. He feared Cerberus. "What should we do? You're our guard, do something."

"He is. But he can't fight them alone," Dr. Brynn Cole, the leader of the enclave interrupted. As she looked at Jacob, her hands pressed protectively on her stomach.

Her gesture reminded him he was no longer a lone wolf. He had people to care of and protect.

"We have to defend our family. And we have to do it together. Can you find volunteers, Brynn? I'll teach them to use guns. You and the others can take this chance to evacuate."

"I won't leave without you." She insisted. "If this is the end, we'll face it together. Besides, without you, we can't go far."

Around eight months ago, Jacob asked Shepard why she still loved Kaidan although he was rude to her on Horizon. That day, he didn't understand her words. Eventually, Brynn showed him the answer.

_When you love someone, you'll do crazy things that you can't explain._

"I'll do anything to keep you safe, all of you." He promised. Even thought it might cost his life, he didn't care.

"Dr. Cole," someone yelled. "We got a call from the Alliance!"

They were saved. Dr. Cole smiled in relief but Jacob was still skeptical. "Be careful, Brynn. It could be a trick. We all know how tricky The Illusive Man is."

"It could be our chance. Let's talk to them first, alright?" She didn't want to risk his life.

She was probably right and he didn't have a choice anyway. "Ok, let's pick this call. But did they tell you who is their CO?"

The operator seemed shocked. He said breathlessly. "It's Commander Shepard... of the Normandy."

* * *

"Your true love is the Normandy."

In another time, another life without Kaidan and Butterfly, she might have agreed with Jacob. But she knew her home was with her daughter and Kaidan.

The ex-Cerberus agent was shocked when she told him. Although he knew about the Lazarus project, he didn't know anything about her child. The Illusive Man probably knew a family man like Jacob would never go with his plan, so he kept the Caterpillar project from the young man's knowledge.

Their conversation was interrupted by Cerberus's attack. It was an hour after the emergency evacuation that they had a chance to talk again on the Normandy.

The man got hurt during the fight, so Chakwas patched him up before the scientist team went to join the Alliance.

And that's when Jacob finally met Butterfly.

The girl wasn't in good condition, though. She was still exhausted from the food poisoning, lying on the patient's bed in fetal position.

"I really don't know what to say." He said as quiet as possible to avoid waking the girl. "The Illusive Man did this to an innocent girl? How could I never see his evil? I mean, am I blind?"

"One who had been blinded by bias didn't see the truth although it was in front of him." Butterfly wasn't deep in sleep like they thought. She tried to get up but Chakwas cooed her to back to sleep.

"Sleep some more, honey. You were up all night."

"I better go back to my room. So you can heal other patients."

The doctor gave her a kiss on the cheek before letting her go.

Jacob waited for the door to close before he said, "She reminds me of someone."

"People say she looks a lot like me," Shepard said proudly, as she walked in.

"She looks like you, I'll give you that." He said as Chakwas ran a scanner on him. "The way she carries herself reminds me of... a young woman. She was a nun. It's hard to forget. The galaxy is vast but it's rare to see God's believer these days."

"Wait, a nun?" Could it be possible? "Was she Marian White?"

"You know her?"

"Yes, I do. She was B's surrogate mother. Marian gave birth to her and raised her for more than a year before she... was killed."

Gasping, Jacob stared at the Commander like she had second head. He didn't even feel when Chakwas' needle sewed his wound.

"How could you know her, Jacob?" Not noticing his reaction, Shepard asked.

"She... When I still worked with Cerberus, I was their head of security. It was my duty to see when a stranger came into our lab. One day, Dr. Folic brought her on board. They left a few hours later."

"Dr. Folic. You mean Arum Folic?"

"Yes. That good guy." He smiled. His memory about the old man was a good one. "Talking about which, he cared a lot about her. He checked her health _through and through._"

As he said _'through and through'_, he raised his hands to make quote gestures.

"What do you mean _'through and through,' Jacob_?"

"It's personal. But since it involves your child, I have to tell you. He... checked if she was still a virgin. I thought it was odd, but makes sense now."

"Miranda said he was obsessed with his work. I think he wanted a perfect woman to carry his _'subject'_." Dr. Chakwas added.

Sighing, Shepard wiped her face with her hands. "I used to think he was a good man. But the more I find out about him... Perhaps he was even crazier than Arachne."

"The line between intelligence and crazy is very thin. He saved those women and your girls. Perhaps he wasn't all bad." Chakwas tried optimism.

"You're right. He wasn't a bad guy. Well, just too obsessed. The entire time I knew him, he always talked about creating the perfect human being. It was a good goal, but his method was... horrible." Jacob agreed.

"TIM shares his dream, I bet." Thank God he didn't make Butterfly half-husk like Cerberus' troop.

The ex-Cerberus agent just nodded.

Dr. Cole entered the med bay. Liara accompanied her.

"Dr. Cole and I just finished discussing her latest project." The asari said. "You wouldn't believe it, Shepard. But it seems one of the implants she worked on was the Mati."

Did she hear it right? "This is too much of a... coincidence."

"I know what you mean, Commander. I can't believe it myself." Dr. Cole agreed. She still looked shock. "My teammate finished it around two months ago before he disappeared. I looked at the schematics and remembered it immediately."

"You said before it was the tech from the Collector's base." God, she hated thinking her daughter had anything involving those bastards.

"Unfortunately, it was. I feel sorry every time I think about those men we planted with that thing."

"I've heard about them."

"It's another reason I left Cerberus." Cole confessed. "We tried to help them by removing those implants but... Six of them died. Three got brain damage and the last one was... had the worst fate."

"You don't say..."_What was worst than death?_

"He lost his mind. He said the old machines were coming."

"I said that too." Shepard crossed her arms. People used to think she was insane until the Reapers invaded Earth.

"Unlike you, he said he was a Prothean scientist and he was working on some massive weapon that might be able to destroy the Reapers."

Liara stared at Shepard. But the Commander wore a poker face. "Did he finish it?"

"No, he didn't. He said the Catalyst had been stolen."

The Crucible was massive, so it was hard to keep it secret. But only few people had a hint about the Catalyst. And when Shepard asked Dr. Cole to help with the Crucible, she didn't explain the details nor mention the mystery object.

"By the Goddess," Liara exclaimed. And Shepard knew how she felt.

"Doc, please tell me you recorded everything he said. I know it sounds insane but it could be useful," the Commander asked desperately.

Cole stared at her as if she went mad. Thankfully, the good doctor didn't say it out loud. "I recorded his case, Commander. If you want, I can send them to you. In fact, I think I have a picture in my tool." She fidgeted with her tool for a while. When she finally found what she was looking for, she showed it to everyone.

It was a sketch of the Crucible. In the head of the massive device there was something that looked like a pod. The Commander froze as she saw it.

"Shepard," Liara asked. "Do you have any idea...?"

"I'm not sure, but it could be Prothean. Javik said his people were able to share memories by touching each other. They recorded messages in objects like the beacon. This guy might have received the vision when he interacted with one of those. But with his mental state, he misunderstood it was his idea."

Well, it made more sense than reincarnation.

"Possibly," Chakwas agreed. "Someone said _'when the end of the world comes, everything goes mad.'_ Anything could be possible at this point."

"We can use it. Thanks for info, doc." Shepard cut her off, fearing this might lead to Butterfly.

Something in the back of her mind warned her to keep Butterfly's story secret. Her gut saved her life more than she was able to count, and trusted it for now.

"Well, just out of curiosity. What happened to the man afterwards?" Chakwas still wondered. Her eyes clouded with worry.

"It wasn't pretty. He kept repeating his chaotic memories and one day he... gouged his eyes out with his fingers and..." Dr. Cole seemed pale. She sat down.

Everyone gulped.

Liara looked green. "Perhaps we don't have to define the details."

Thankfully, everyone agreed, especially Dr. Cole. "He lost his mind completely. We tried everything to save him, but it was too late."

"Removing the implant didn't help?"

Dr. Cole nodded. "It was similar to having a time-bomb in their heads. When the time comes, those implant took them down. It was too dangerous so my friend refused to run more tests."

"I don't think TIM took it well."

"The Illusive Man doesn't like to be denied, Commander. Just a week after that, the scientist disappeared suddenly without a trace."

The two women under Dr. Arum's care _'disappeared'_ after they lost the embryos. This must be TIM's favorite way to deal with a thorn at his side. How could she once think he was a good guy?

She almost believed that Cerberus wanted to save the humanity. She was wrong and that made her furious.

"I think I should let you rest." Sighing, Shepard felt tired herself. It was a long day. "We'll approach the nearest Alliance post in an hour or so. If you need anything, feel free to ask EDI. But Jacob probably knows the way around."

"The Alliance did a lot of renovations. I'm not sure I know this Normandy." The man commented sarcastically.

They hadn't had enough time to finish the job. Shepard couldn't complain about the messiness although she still wondered who stole her ship models from her cabin and hid them around the Normandy.

"Um, talking about which... Admiral Hackett might able to help. I'll talk to him."

* * *

_Somewhere in the galaxy_

In a large screen, there were holograms of the Normandy's crew. Each of them had a large X mark on their face. At the middle of the mess was a holo of a woman in N7 armor, but her face was covered by red lines drawn wildly.

Below that, a holo of people having dinner was newly placed. Their faces were marked except two faces.

Someone carefully cropped those beautiful faces from the group and placed them near a holo of a daughter who was sleeping on her father's back. A trembling hand reached for them, longing to touch the real ones.

"Soon, my love. You will be mine.'

* * *

Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta. :D


	49. Wondering

"Love is untamed force. When we try to control it, it destroys us. When we try to imprison it, it enslaves us. When we try to understand it, it leaves us feeling lost and confused."

-_Paulo Coelho_

* * *

**Wondering**

* * *

It was quiet. He could hear his heart beating in the dark, abandoned cargo bay. Looking around, he found no one, but he could feel a pair of eyes staring at him.

There was a sound of a falling object. The lieutenant spun around to find the source of noise but it was only a pile of containers. At first, he wanted to go investigate but then he realized it could be a trick.

_I won't fall for the same trick twice!_He swore to himself.

James was turning around, expecting to see his hunter behind him. But he felt someone's hand on his chest before he moved.

"Got you!"

Shocked, the lieutenant stumbled backward and bumped into said pile. The container on the top opened. When it fell the powder inside coated James from head to toe.

A similar laugh echoed in the bay as Butterfly appeared from under her cloak.

"What a shame, Vega." Via intercom, Garrus teased. "This is just hide and seek, but you keep losing, several times now."

"She used a cloak!" The lieutenant remarked.

"Like the Phantoms, Geth Hunters, and other Infiltrators. You said yourself you wanted to train to fight them."

"This isn't training. We're just playing hide and seek. It's more like babysitting Her Highness." James wasn't an Alenko, but he wasn't any less stubborn. He still didn't accept his defeat.

Butterfly placed her hands on her hips and bend down to look at him angrily. Her V-shape shirt dropped dangerously low revealing no bra. "Lion cub learns how to hunt by playing with other cubs. This isn't just a game. And I don't need you to babysit me."

It was true his Princess didn't need a babysitter. She could handle herself well enough. Besides, EDI would always look after her via security cameras although the mech body went on missions. She was perfectly safe on the Normandy.

And to make sure history wasn't repeated, Shepard always left someone with fighting capabilities on the ship.

James didn't make a smart comeback because he was distracted. Butterfly's body was nearly perfect especially her boobs. It'd be a damn nice view if her hair was out of the way.

This beautiful creature was so close but he was not able to touch her. Surely, this was torture from someone above. Perhaps it's why he had had an_exciting_dream about her twin every night since the day Arachne hit him.

"Her eyes are up there, lieutenant." Joker growled. He was like Garrus, a protective uncle. That brought the big guy back to reality.

Quickly, James dropped his eyes. "I know they are. I was just... thinking. I didn't look at... anything."

"Thinking? About what?" Butterfly crossed her arms. That made her boobs look fuller. James almost couldn't look away. But that damn hair was still in the way.

"Have you ever thought about cutting your hair? I mean... Wouldn't it be easier to wear your helmet if your hair's shorter?"

That question came out of his mouth before he thought about it. To his relief, she moved away from him.

"I've thought about it. But every time I mention cutting my hair, Aunty Liara looks like she's going to cry. Wait. What brought this up?"

"Nothing. Just idle thinking." Even if someone forced him, he wouldn't say it, ever.

Butterfly didn't buy it. "You're lying."

"Lying? Oh come on, Princess. Why would I do that?" But he avoided her eyes.

"Who knows? You've been acting strange lately. What's your problem?" The girl seemed to get some attitude from her mother. She watched over her family although she was the youngest.

Her earnest questioning shamed James. He hoped he could be more honest with her. "It's nothing. I swear. I just haven't been sleeping well. My brain is tired. Sometimes I lose my focus, but I won't let it effect the mission. Don't worry."

"What's kept you up all these nights?" Butterfly wasn't giving up until she got an answer.

"Just a strange dream."

But she didn't take it lightly. "There're many kinds of dreams. Some come from your subconsciousness, but some don't. You must be careful, James."

"I appreciate the thought, Princess. But I can..." Butterfly frowned. She seemed sad and he couldn't shrug her off. "If it becomes worse, you will be the first to know. I promise."

"Alright. It's your mind. I can't force you." She still pouted, though.

And that undid James. He should have known he could deny her nothing. Gently, the big guy reached for her hand. "Hey, Princess..."

She let him hold her hand. Still, her face didn't show any expression but annoyance. "Don't."

"Look, I'm sorry." Why did he feel bad? He didn't do anything wrong, did he? "I didn't mean to keep anything from you. It's a man's pride, you know."

"I don't know."

She shook off his grip and activated the cloak. James didn't even hear when she walked away. He knew she left only because the elevator opened. For an adept, she was damn good with infiltrator's skills.

Dios, why did he feel like he just fucked up? The lieutenant collapsed on the container, feeling exhausted.

There was no other noise but the Normandy's engine until Joker broke the silence. "Is it just me, or does our girl look... jealous."

"Please defines_'jealous'_, Jeff," EDI asked.

"It's er... an adjective. Meaning someone is fearful or wary of being supplanted of losing affection... My bad. That's impossible. My girl isn't..." He paused as he tried to gain his thought. "You two are just friends, right, Jimmy?"

"Lola will kill me if I ever lay any fingers on her girl," James replied, still holding his head.

"That isn't the right answer." Garrus corrected him. "I wonder if her biotics are faster than my bullet.

"Ha, ha," but his laugh sounded empty. "Everyone wants a piece of me, literally. I know she is untouchable, Scar. There's a reason why I call her Princess."

"Then why don't you enlighten me? What's happening between you two?" Garrus still wondered.

Sighing, James held his head in his hands. "I don't know."

* * *

"I don't know."

Spent, Liara almost collapsed on her feet. Not so far, Shepard and the rest of the team was staring at the corpse of an unidentified monster.

"It's the Reaper's troll. It used to be... Asari, I think." Kaidan presumed.

"Ardat-Yakshi, to be specific." EDI supported his theory.

"Goddess," Liara cried, finally collapsing on a nearby fountain. "What have they done to them?"

"It seemed my people made a mistake when they uplifted the asari." Javik exclaimed. He tried to keep his distance from the AI. The prothean really didn't trust any synthetic creature. He even told Shepard to throw EDI out the airlock.

The Commander didn't listen to him, fortunately.

"Mortals can't do God's job." Tali sighed. "My ancestors tried to do that, and were driven from their homeworld."

Four eyes narrowed. "We weren't stupid enough to build synthetics."

The quarian gasped. She shook with anger. "You're so..."

Shepard jumped in. "Only thing we should focus on right now is investigating this monastery and ending this nightmare if we can. Only thing we'll kill is the Reaper's trolls, not each other."

She could say Tali tried hard to not stomp like an angry kid. "Alright. What should we do next, Shepard?"

"We'll open that door, find out what happened in this place, and why the asari commandos lost contact."

"We already know that." Javik protested. "The Reapers came, turned the Ardat-Yakshi to those screaming creatures, and killed the commandos. We saw enough bodies on our way to confirm it. Why do we not just bomb this place?"

"Samara and her daughters are in there. We won't leave without them." Shepard insisted.

"Then they are as good as dead. Do not waste our time or risk our lives saving them."

Gripping her shotgun tighter, Shepard tried hard to suppress the urge to shoot the Prothean. "That isn't my way. I will not leave my friend behind."

"But I saw your memories. You left that salarian to..."

He didn't finish the sentence because a biotic kick crushed his head. Kaidan knocked him out in one hit. It was a full force biotic kick. Only thing that saved Javik's life was his shield.

Everyone was shocked. The Major was the most patient person they knew. That was unexpected but understandable.

"Wake him up, Liara." Kaidan ordered sternly. "He can wait at the entrance until we come back from the Great Hall."

"We can't leave him. He is a jerk but this place is too dangerous to stay alone." Tali protested. She was too good to leave the Prothean on his own.

"Nah, he is a big guy." Shepard shrugged.

Javik woke up with a groan. However, he didn't complain when Kaidan commanded him to stay. The Prothean just murmured something about 'primitives and 'pheromones'.

From the long corridor, they made their way to the giant door. Shepard grabbed Kaidan's wrist when everyone walked ahead of them.

"I have to say. That was kind of hot, Major."

"What do you mean, the biotic kick?" He tried to look innocent, but his eyes shone with mischief.

"That too. I'd never thought you looking angry could turn me on." She lowered her voice to keep it from the others, but that also gave a chill down his spine.

"Not now, Commander. I promise I'll take care of that when we're safe on the Normandy."

She just smiled and grabbed his ass.

* * *

"I don't know, mother."

The Justicar stared at her daughter, thinking. Her face didn't show any emotion as her last daughter was crying in front of her.

"We left Rila to die." Falere pointed at the ruin that once was a monastery for the Ardat-Yakshi.

After what the Reapers did to those innocent women, Shepard and her team couldn't let the place stand. They detonated the bomb set by the asari commandos to purge the whole monastery.

"Your sister was brave, Falere." Shepard calmed her down. "The Reaper turned her, but she escaped their grip and helped us. Her love for you was stronger than their indoctrination."

Falere closed her eyes. Tears flowed as she thought back to her sister. The poor girl knew she would turn to another Banshee so she stayed behind to detonate the bomb. It was reasonable to leave her. But Falere couldn't accept it.

"It was not strong enough to save her."

"Nothing could, I'm afraid." The Commander sighed.

"And now, I am the one left behind." As she looked at her mother, Falere seemed to know what was going to happen. "The monastery's no longer standing. What will you do to me, mother?"

"The code requires that the Ardat-Yakshi cannot live outside the monastery." With an emotionless voice, Samara unsheathed her pistol.

The younger asari didn't seem surprised. "I knew it. You always rely on the code. Always..."

But instead of shooting her daughter, the Justicar aimed the pistol at her own head. "I cannot betray the code nor kill my last daughter. This is my only way."

"Mother, no!"

Faster than her thoughts, Shepard dashed to the Justicar. Kaidan kicked the pistol out of Samara's reach after it fell from her hand.

"Let go." Samara growled, but it was a weak resistance.

"What do you think you're doing?" Shepard replied with the same tone. She still pressed the asari to the floor. "Have you ever thought about your daughter? How could she live after she saw her sister and mother die? Killing yourself is not going to help anything."

Thinking back to her own daughter, Shepard knew what would happen if she didn't stop Samara.

"She'd be haunted forever."

"But what should I do? Killing Morinth was enough. I cannot kill my last daughter."

"You don't have to do it, mother." Firmly, Falere announced. "I won't leave this place. If the Reapers come back, they won't take me alive. I swear."

"Are you sure, Falere?" Samara still concerned.

"I don't need the monastery nor the code to honor myself. It won't be easy but I won't give up. I have to live for Rila."

After living with strict codes for centuries, Samara hardly showed her emotions. She only let a small smile brighten her face for a few minutes. "Then the code allows you to stay."

Still crying, the younger asari hugged her. "Thank you, mother."

Samara hugged back. It was some time until they broke the hug. Although they weren't close, family was still family.

"And thank you, Commander." The Justicar nodded toward the Commander who returned the gesture in kind.

"Well, that went well." Shepard sighed in relief. She was glad she didn't lose another friend. "I'll leave you two to talk or whatever you want, unless you want to come with us."

"I will go to war, Commander. But I need to talk with Falere. Farewell."

"It's alright. I understand." Shepard shook her hand with the Justicar one last time. Back in the days they were on the suicide mission, she learned a lot from Samara. The Justicar was like a mother to her.

"See you again, Samara."

Cortez came to pick them up. Through the window, Shepard looked at the mother and child wave at them until they disappeared from sight.

Behind her, Kaidan wrapped his arms around her waist. "Somehow, this reminds me of our girl."

She sighed and leaned on his chest, ignoring his hard armor. "When I helped Samara kill her daughter, I wondered how horrible she felt. Now I think I know."

"Morinth was a murderer. She killed people while melding with them. Samara did what she had to do."

"I know... If I was in her shoes, I would have done the same. But that doesn't mean I have to feel good about it. Thank goodness our daughter is a good girl."

"Yeah, thank God for Marian White. She did a great job raising Butterfly."

Shepard smiled and closed her eyes. In her heart, she swore that although she didn't know what would happen in the future, she would love her boyfriend and daughter to the best of her ability.

Because that's all she knew.

* * *

The party is coming.

Thank to The Lonely Traveler for the beta. :D


	50. Unexpected party

"Life is a series of surprises and would not be worth taking or keeping if it were not."

_- Ralph Waldo Emerson_

* * *

**Unexpected Party**

* * *

The door hissed open after the censor identified the newcomer. Automatically, the curtains opened. The warm light from the artificial sun peeked through the transparent windows, illuminating the white suite and bathing the walls a creamy shade of orange.

"Wow!" Butterfly ran into the apartment, excited by the view. "Look mommy, there's a fireplace."

It was an artificial fire. Warm but harmless. The girl could wave her hand over it and not get burned. Butterfly ran around, exploring the kitchen, the dining area, and the game room. She even did some push-ups in the mini gym before running to the upper floor.

"Hey, Princess, be careful. This is grandpa Anderson's place. You don't want to break anything." Kaidan followed her.

Shepard leaned on the console near the door, smiling. She still couldn't believe Anderson had given this place to her. It was a nice apartment, a lot bigger than her place. But somehow, she didn't feel like it belonged to her. Perhaps it was because the place used to be the old man's home. The home he wanted to live with Kahlee.

The console activated when she got close enough. It played a video of David Anderson. Although she couldn't recognize the background, she knew he was on Earth, in one of his conclaves.

"Make yourself at home, Shepard. This apartment is yours now. I hope you like it. This is where I had planned to live after retirement. But the longer I stay on Earth, the less I want to leave. You are only one I trust to take care of this apartment. It could be where you rest... to charge your energy, have a good time. If you don't want it, just consider it a gift for my grandchild."

Tears fell down her cheeks. Poor Anderson, he fought so many battles, saved many lives, but he never had a chance to have a family. Although he found the love of his life, they just couldn't be together.

And since he never had a child, he considered her as a daughter. Butterfly was his granddaughter since the girl called him grandpa since the first time they met.

"Take care of yourself and your family, Shepard. One day... we will take the Earth back, together."

"We will, Anderson." Although he didn't hear it, she promised. It could be a short time, but she would make this last shore leave worth remembering.

A hand touched her cheek gently. Shepard smiled and leaned into his touch. Well, she risked her life saving the galaxy, perhaps she was allowed to have a few pleasurable moments.

"Where's B?" Shepard asked. She was still, and always a mother. Her child was her first priority.

"She just fell in love with the hot tub upstairs. I think you have to drag her out."

"Let her have fun. She kept complaining that she couldn't bring Mr. K with her. That probably brightened her up." Her hands trailed lower and lower. When Kaidan eyed her questioningly, she smirked. "I think we have another bedroom down here."

"Yeah, I see. But it doesn't have a door. We have to be quiet."

"And quick," She finished the sentence for him although she knew Kaidan was anything but that. He was so damn patient and enjoyed taking his time.

"I'll try my best." The Major murmured before taking her lips.

"You have new message."

The couple released each other's arms as the console alerted them. Kaidan didn't want to let go.

"It can wait." He whispered in her ear, trying to stop Shepard from reading the message.

"It can be important. I'll just take a peek. We can continue this if it's not urgent." She pushed him off to read the message. The whole crew of the Normandy was on shore leave but she allowed them to call her if anything happened. Since she knew her crew, they would never send her a message unless it was vital.

But her smile faded as she read the sender's name. "It's from Hackett."

Alarmed, the Major turned on his professional mode. The Admiral wouldn't communicate with them unless it was important. "What's happening? Is there another coup?"

"No." Her face grim. "He is on the Presidium. And he wants to see B."

"I have a bad feeling about this." Kaidan, too, frowned.

"What? You don't think he actually wants to see his granddaughter?"

The Major wasn't in the mood. "You know him, Amala. Hackett is the most serious man, I ever known. I hardly expect it's a social meeting."

"Perhaps you're right. Should I refuse him?"

Sighing, Kaidan shook his head. "I'll go with her. It's a short trip if I take a cab."

With good timing, another mail alert interrupted them. Kaidan read it and laughed.

"Joker wants to go out on a date? Should I remind him, you're mine?"

"I don't think so. Our pilot is too fragile. Besides, I'll go with you."

"No need," He had another plan. "The sushi place he mentioned is a good one. You should go and have some fun. You've earned it. You might want to change. The restaurant is a bit... picky."

"Picky?"

"Let's say you need a fancy clothes. A dress, maybe."

"Seriously," She really couldn't recall the last time she put on a dress. Probably never. Where could she get one?

Wait... Someone messed with her wardrobe when she was in custody. When she came back, she found a tight black dress in her size (with a pair of high heels) but she never put it on.

"I hope you had nothing to do with that dress in my wardrobe, otherwise we need to talk."

Brown eyes blinked innocently. "I don't know what you're talking about ma'am."

Shepard punched his arm. She knew he would never admit it. "B, get up. Grandpa Hackett wants to meet you."

"Really?" Butterfly asked with high voice. She ran out of the bathroom, still soaked and naked. Despite her look, she was only a baby. And a baby still didn't have modesty.

The parents sighed in harmony.

"Dry yourself, Princess. And don't walk around naked again." Trying not to lose his temper, Kaidan ordered without yelling.

"Why?"

Shepard chuckled dryly as Kaidan felt the beginning of headache. "Because you might... catch a cold."

"And cause someone a heart-attack. Come on, girl. Dry up before you ruin the carpet." The mother grabbed a towel, tried to wrap it around her daughter.

But the girl jumped away. "You have to catch me first."

"I can't believe it." Shepard exclaimed. "Come back, B! You can't run around like that."

"I can." Butterfly rushed through another door, leaving a wet trail along the way.

Kaidan chuckled, but stopped as Shepard shot him a dagger glare. "What?"

"She is your daughter."

"She is yours too. In fact, I think she got that after you. I don't mean you like to run around naked. It's just... she has a strong head. She won't follow orders if she doesn't like it."

"Yes, that sounds familiar." The Major had a good point. "But I always listened to you, right? Then you can probably convince her to dress up. Hackett is a busy man. He won't wait for long. You better hurry."

He wasn't surprised. Butterfly was only one in galaxy able to deny Commander Shepard's orders and stay alive. To avoid any arguments, Shepard would let him handle it.

"Yes, ma'am." He grabbed the towel from her but also took advantage to hold and kiss her. "Butterfly and I will go see Hackett. You go on your date. Don't have too much fun without me, ok?"

"Of course... Hey, do you think they have a take-out menu? If the food is as good as they say, I might bring some for dinner."

"Don't worry. We'll eat outside. For Butterfly, the Apollo opens twenty-four hours a day."

They were about to kiss when they heard a strange noise from another room.

"Mommy, Daddy, this bed is so... bouncy. Yahoo!"

She's jumping on the bed. The parents didn't have to look.

"Better get her dressed." Sighing, the Major kissed her one last time before departing. "See you tonight."

"See you," Shepard replied. She wanted to spend her shore leave with her family, but her duty as The Fucking Commander Shepard always came first.

They left the apartment at the same time but took different cabs. Neither of them expected any accidents, so they went unarmed and unprotected.

* * *

The Citadel's view was amazing. Kaidan admitted. But suddenly the cab swayed. The Major knew this wasn't normal.

"What's happening?" He asked the driver.

"Technical problem, sir. We need to stop. Sorry for the inconvenience, but I'll call another cab."

The cab gently landed on a nearby landing pad. Kaidan had never been in this area, but he could tell it was personal pad. On the horizon, he saw the Normandy docked on the Alliance's docking bay.

_Wait! This isn't the way to the Presidium._ The Major was going to interrogate the driver but the man opened the door and then jumped out. The father and child rushed off the cab only to see him float away with a hyper-jet.

He was a merc. And his friends must be around.

Automatically, Kaidan held his daughter protectively. They were unarmed. He had to be very careful.

Not long after, another cab arrived. A large group of mercenaries with high power guns and armor circled the pad, trapping them in the middle.

"Surrender, and we won't kill you." The woman who looked like the boss said. The voice beneath the mask sounded inhuman. She probably used some device to conceal her real voice.

"Daddy?" Butterfly asked.

Still not looking at the girl, the Major replied. "They're full armed, but we have no guns."

"So?"

"We'll surrender..."

* * *

It was the 22nd century, but high heels were still uncomfortable to wear. Shepard was glad to sit down as soon as she found Joker who was waiting for her on a dining table. Judging from the look, he already had a few glasses of cocktails.

"Not bad, huh?" The pilot waved around. "Save the galaxy twice, and you get a seat in the best restaurant in the Citadel. Look at the line, most people have to wait for months to get here."

Shepard looked at the line of waiting people. It was long of course, but something else attracted her attention.

A woman, dark skin, big eyes, wearing an Alliance uniform was trying to pass the French man at the front door. She jumped like a kangaroo and called out Shepard's name.

"So, what's the problem you mentioned about in the message?" Joker asked, bringing her attention back to him.

"Me? I didn't send you the message. You sent me the message..."

She didn't finish her sentence, though. The jumping lady she saw earlier finally made her way through the man. As she stood in front of the commander, she looked nervous.

"Commander Shepard!" She started. "I have important things to tell you. Very, very important."

Shepard and her pilot exchanged a stare. They weren't excited about it.

"Everyone seems to think of me only when they need help." The commander really wasn't thrilled. "But who are you, exactly?"

"I didn't tell you... Oh, I forgot it again! Silly Brooks." The young woman knocked her own head. "Sorry commander. I'm Staff Analyst Brooks of the Alliance. I found an attempt to access your data. Someone is trying to..."

Brooks was cut off by a gunshot. A group of mercenaries knocked the French man off before shooting the ceiling.

"Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the show of violence."

The customers in the bar screamed and crouched to the floor. No one ever expected this was going to happen in the Citadel.

It wasn't a raid. The man who looked like the boss ordered his men. "Find me Shepard."

"Shit!" Shepard flipped the table and hid behind it. However, one mercenary found Brooks, and dragged the jumpy girl away despite her struggle.

"What should we do?" Joker asked. Since the Collector's attack on the Normandy SR2 several months ago, he hadn't been in this type of situation. Fighting wasn't his thing and he didn't know what to do.

Quickly, the commander made a plan. It wasn't pretty but she would apologize to her friend later. "Go back to the Normandy, and call the crew for reinforcement. I'll keep them busy. Go."

"The Normandy, the crew, and reinforcement... Got it." Quietly, the pilot sneaked to the back door.

Unfortunately, the merc saw him. A guy called and walked towards Joker, not noticing Shepard. As soon as he was in range, she grabbed and tossed him to the floor. An echo of broken bones was heard in the room, as she finished him with her Omni-blade.

"You used me as bait!" Joker accused her.

There was no time to think of a smart comeback. Shepard just dismissed him. "Go!"

Other mercenaries began to shoot. The pilot could do nothing but leave. He saw she took a gun from the dead merc so he was sure she would be fine.

He still prayed.

_Be safe, Shepard. I will never forgive you if you die this time._

* * *

Now, we're going to enjoy the DLC. But I won't follow the game story line, of course. :D

And thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta. We are in the good ride too.


	51. Falling

"Sometimes you wake up. Sometimes the fall kills you. And sometimes, when you fall, you fly."

― _Neil Gaiman, The Sandman_

* * *

**Falling**

* * *

It was shore leave. Everyone went to have some fun. Her squad had already gotten drunk before the sun touched the horizon line. Shepard was the only one still sober, although she tried to drink herself to oblivion.

If she got drunk enough, she might end up in bed with someone. She wanted to lose her virginity, but her fear was always holding her down.

Seven years, she was caught in a nightmare. In reality, Clint saved her just in time. But in her nightmare, she ended up bleeding and dying in the burning building.

This had to end.

Her plan was destroyed when she heard the siren and someone shout in alarm.

"Pirates! We're under attack!"

_Great! She really wanted to shoot someone right now._

* * *

Hurt... Every fiber in her body was hurt. Taking a breath and it felt like a knife was piercing her chest. Damn, her ribs were probably broken and her lung pierced. Her feet began to hurt and her shoes were nowhere to be found. No need to mention her dress. It was soaked, cut, and torn here and there.

Looking up, she wasn't sure if she was able to complain. Normal people would have died if they had fallen from this height. But she was still alive and able to move. That was good enough.

_Hell of a day._ Shepard thought sarcastically. _Kaidan will be a little upset, if not amused when he finds out, I just blew up his favorite restaurant._

Well, technically it was those mercenaries but she was blamed anyway. They wanted to kill her, so they blew the floor and then she fell. It must be Cerberus' cybernetic implants that saved her.

Taking a deep breath, she tried to stand up. She couldn't die here.

_I have to go back to my daughter and boyfriend._

Looking around, she was sure she was in the lower ward, not in the resident area. There was a ton of putrid junk, and whatever she held onto to slow her speed. Good thing, the shattered restaurant's transparent floor wasn't made of glass, so it didn't cut her.

One, two, three, she counted her footsteps as she slowly made her way to the outside. It helped her to steady her breathing and ease her pain. After awhile, she felt better. Cerberus' cybernetic implant were magical.

She still needed a doctor, though.

Outside her 'landing pad' was the road for skycars. At the other side was the lower ward. She probably was in the warehouse area. If her memory served her right, there was a fresh market nearby.

She had been there only once, many years ago. She hoped it hadn't changed much.

"Commander Shepard, are you still alive? I mean, do you read me?" A jumpy voice rang in her Omni-tool. Shepard remembered it was Brooks. But how could she know the Commander's channel?

"I read you, Brooks. But I saw you get shot when you tried to save me from the sniper."

"Oh! Yeah, I got shot. So I used medi-gel. All of it, in fact. I feel funny right now... Don't they say using too much medi-gel made you feel jumpy?"

Shepard was glad Brooks was still alive. She had lost too many people already. "Good work, Brooks. But I think you used too much medi-gel."

"I'm safe now. It's you who is in danger. Where are you?"

"In the lower ward, I guess. Wait. I see a landing pad... It's a taxi station or something. And the fresh market."

Brooks murmured the list of landmarks in the ward. It wasn't even close. But the staff analyst finally found her position. "I know where you are, but I can't go anywhere because C-Sec locked the area down... to secure the area. I... Oh, yes, I'm stuck in lockdown area."

"I think that's quite obvious." Why did she always have strange allies? "Ok, calm down, Brooks. Can you tell Commander Bailey my position?"

The staff analyst was quiet for a moment. "They can't pick you from there, Commander. You have to go to Cision Motors, it's a skycar lot. They have a landing pad. C-Sec can pick you up. I'll send you the coordinates."

_Like I have another choice._ Shepard sighed. She climbed and jumped across the rooftop of buildings to her destination. Everything looked fine but fate never was kind.

The fresh market was deserted. People were probably driven off by the mercenaries. Shit, these annoying bastards just didn't give up. They were still looking for her.

Shepard was a vanguard. She wasn't going to give up either. No one could stop her from coming back to her family. Although she had no idea who these people were, anyone who aimed their guns towards her was her enemy, and her enemy must die.

* * *

It was just like someone kicked the hornet's nest. Those mercenaries just kept coming, fully armed, strong armor, and shield. But she had only a ragged dress and a pistol.

_Where was the reinforcement?_

Shepard dragged her limp body off the market. She could see a sign of Cision Motors not so far ahead. However, with blurring senses, she didn't see the sniper on the rooftop.

A red dot was moving on her rear, and then stopped on her head. Shepard didn't know the gunman slowly touched the trigger.

Pang! Shepard jumped into nearby cover. Her ears still ringing with the sound of the bullet that missed her only by a few millimeters. Her soldier's instinct told her that wasn't because of her luck.

There was no other shot. The sniper was waiting for her to leave the cover or was busy reloading the gun. She had only a few minutes to open that door and take shelter in the building. As fast as she was able, Shepard jumped and used her Spectre status to override one of the main doors.

She didn't know there was a surprise waiting for her.

As soon as the glass door opened, Shepard fell inside. She tried to get up but paused half way because two guns were aiming at her.

And then... another surprise.

A blue light of dark energy threw the two gunmen across the room, crashed the glass window, and fell down to space outside. Shepard gasped in surprise as a smug Major strolled towards her.

"Looks like you're having a bad day, Commander."

She didn't know if she wanted to punch him or kiss him senseless. Her Major looked so hot in his armor and the blue light of his biotics. But that smirk when he slowly ogled up and down all over her body...

"Nice outfit."

If only they weren't in danger, she would ravish him right now.

"Mommy!" Shepard stumbled backwards as someone jumped at her. She knew it was Butterfly even before the cloak faded to show her lovely daughter in full Infiltrator's armor. "Are you alright? I took down the sniper but he shot first. Did he hurt you?"

"It's alright, B. I'm fine. You did a great job." Shepard kissed her forehead although she was wearing a mask. "You're an Adept. Why are you wearing Infiltrator armor?"

"I use a sniper gun. Aunty Liara thought it would be more fitting if I have a cloak. Besides, they have light armor. It doesn't make a difference."

"Well, that makes sense."

The aunts and uncles wanted to keep their niece as far as possible from the fray. Snipers were a powerful backup and were not in the front line (mostly). That's the best they could do for sweet Butterfly.

But because she was deadly long range didn't mean she was harmless close range. Butterfly always kept twin monocular blades with her.

No need to say about her biotics.

"Anyway, weren't you two going to have meeting with Hackett? And how did you find me?"

"That was a trap." Kaidan answered. "Our cab dropped us in the middle of a mercenary group."

"Oh my... Are you ok? Did they hurt you? I'll kill them if they..."

The father and child laughed. Shepard stared at them, confused.

"She just asked you the same question. We're lovely family, aren't we?" Kaidan joined the group hug. "I'll tell you when we are safe and warm in our apartment. Now, we still have a long way to go."

"Mind if I join in?" A low, harsh, and thick voice asked. Shepard gasped in shock for a second time.

"Zaeed, how are you here?"

"An ex-friend of mine told me about an easy job. You know. Capturing a beautiful boy and his friend. But I remembered this boy, so I changed sides."

"I'm glad. But doesn't that mean you know who these people are, or who sent them?" Whoever dared touch her daughter and boyfriend must die. Shepard had to know who they were.

"I'm not a nosy person. Do the job and get the money, that's my style."

"What about your friend? Perhaps he knew something."

The mercenary reached for his cigar that wasn't on his mouth. Shepard couldn't help but wonder why he didn't smoke today. "He tried to shoot this little angel, so I... kind of lost it."

Zaeed was a crazy old man, but he rarely lost his temper unless it came to Vido, the man who betrayed and tried to kill him.

What made him mad enough to kill his friend?

"We can talk later. Let's get out of here before more friends come." Shepard said.

Everyone agreed. They marched to another door that led to the landing pad. The door was locked.

"Step back, people." The Commander was going to shoot the door, but the Major stopped her.

"Wait a minute."

Kaidan just knocked on the window and asked the volus behind the counter to open the door nicely.

And the man obliged. He wanted them to leave.

"I could've done that." Shepard grumbled.

They heard the shuttle was coming. It should be the C-Sec shuttle sent by Brooks friend to pick them up. But as soon as it came near them, its hatch opened and the people inside aimed their guns at them.

Shepard and Kaidan dragged their daughter behind the big Cision Motor sign. Zaeed hid behind another cover but the mercenaries didn't seem to notice. They kept shooting at the family. Neither of them had any chance to shoot back.

Bullets couldn't compare with a Reaper's beam. So Butterfly didn't have any problem shielding them. However, that would drain her. The parents had to find a way out, and fast.

"How many clips you have, Kai?" Shepard shouted.

"Not enough. We have to..."

A familiar roar cut them off. Butterfly seemed to know the sound. She stood up to see a giant krogan break the upper floor glass wall and crash on the shuttle. Some of the mercenaries fell down as the shuttle crashed on the landing pad. Wrex enjoyed head-butting, punching, and throwing them around like a boy in a toy shop. Once he was done, the shuttle was completely destroyed.

He missed one on the pad. The mercenary tried to raise his gun but Butterfly threw her Dark Channel at him.

"Hah, my sweet little girl!" As if nothing happened, the warlord opened his arms.

And Butterfly jumped into his arms. "Uncle Wrex, I'm so glad to see you."

"So am I, my little girl. What do you think about krogan dropping style?"

"Awesome!" The girl cheered. "Can you teach me how to do that?"

_That wasn't possible_. Shepard almost shouted. "Don't even think about it, Wrex.."

The warlord made funny noise. "Women..."

Kaidan took that time to slab medi-gel on Shepard's wounds. She got more of them after the shooting. As he worked, he talked to the old friend. "What are you doing here? I thought you were on Tuchanka."

"Just butting heads with the Council over krogan expansion." He groaned. Diplomacy really wasn't his thing. "Grunt's here somewhere too. Don't know where he is, though."

"And how did you find us?" Butterfly asked.

Wrex placed her down and began to ransack the bodies. "Everyone in the ward already knows about the shooting in that restaurant. I thought it'd be fun. Came as soon as possible. Anyone who messes with you and Shepard, messes with me."

"Oh, you're so sweet, Wrex." Shepard purred as Wrex threw her a big gun.

"Be careful, Shepard. Your boy might get jealous." Zaeed joined them. He too, got some toys from the dead mercenaries. "These guys had good weapons and armors. But they weren't Cerberus."

"Have any idea who they are?" Kaidan asked.

"They have guns, and they don't like me." Shepard answered, deadpan.

The Major made a funny face. "Very helpful, thanks."

"I've never seen this gun." Butterfly pointed at the pistol Shepard got from the sushi bar, interrupting her parents. "It isn't what they sale on the Presidium market."

"It could come from black market. I'll keep it. Liara and EDI might help us track down the buyer."

"Before that, we need another ride." Kaidan suggested.

"And fast," without warning, Butterfly formed her shield. It saved them from the explosion.

More mercenaries broke in. One threw a grenade at them but Butterfly kicked it back to the owner. Wrex roared in merriment at the damage she had done. The big uncle was so proud.

Butterfly was more than ready for the fight. Shepard thought bitterly. The mother would never get used to the thought of her little girl going to war.

Those mercenaries didn't stop coming. Despite their capabilities, Shepard thought they better retreat.

"Brooks, we need another ride." She yelled to her tool.

"What?" The staff analyst sounded panicked. Still, Brooks always panicked. "What happened to the shuttle I sent?"

"It was a C-Sec shuttle, but people inside weren't C-Sec. We need a pick up, now!"

"I'm on my way, Commander." Joker interfered. It sounded like he was besides Brooks. "ETA in five. You better clear the landing zone for me."

"No problem."

An azure Biotic Throw mixed with a blue Reave, caused a biotic explosion. The father and child combined their skills together perfectly. Butterfly almost didn't have to shoot a gun. Exactly why she carried only a M98-Widow and monocular blades.

The wave of a Biotic Slash slashed past the object to cut enemies behind. Every movement had its rhythm. Butterfly made killing looked like a bloody dance.

Beautiful and deadly.

"Back to the landing pad." Shepard ordered. She was glad that Butterfly followed her command.

Joker's car arrived. Shepard made sure everyone was inside before she jumped into the shuttle. Butterfly and Zaeed covered her.

Beside the driver's seat, Brooks was there. She almost jumped in excitement. "Commander Shepard, when I saw you fall down that floor, I thought you were dead! But you... You're still alive but those guys... They had guns, grenades, and drones but you killed them all with a pistol! You're amazing."

"I'm not feeling amazing right now." She was exhausted and wounded. All she needed was to heal and a long goodnight sleep.

"No one followed us." Kaidan said. "Stop at the hospital first. And then go to the C-Sec office. Bailey ought to have good explanation for that shuttle."

"We shouldn't drag more people into this mess." Brooks protested. "Besides... they might attack the hospital like Cerberus did. You will put innocent civilians in danger."

Butterfly whined. She didn't want to think about her abduction.

"But Amala... Shepard needs to heal." The Major insisted. "She isn't invincible. I don't know what exactly is happening, but I know we need her at 100%."

Kaidan and Brooks stared at each other unfriendly. They seemed confident in their opinions and wouldn't back down.

Zaeed was enjoying watching them. He saw the Major fight and was impressed, but still wondered if the pretty buy could handle the woman. Butterfly shot him a look and he knew he should do something.

"I know a clinic in the ward. Small place, quiet, and the doctor isn't so nosy. Not cheap but I know you can pay. Our Commander could get a patch-up and nobody would ever know we were there."

Because their jobs weren't always legal, the mercenaries didn't like to go to hospitals. Shepard trusted her mercenary friend.

"Alright, tell Joker the coordinates. About Bailey, I'll consider it after... Damn, I think I lost too much blood. My head..."

Her system stopped producing adrenaline, Shepard finally spent. She fell on her boyfriend and the last thing she remembered was his voice calling her name over and over.

* * *

Just warning. There's a plot twist coming. XD

As always, I can't finish this chapter without help from my beta; The Lonely Traveler.


	52. Respect

"Respect was invented to cover the empty place where love should be."

_- Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina_

* * *

**Respect**

* * *

It wasn't the first time she lost a lot of blood. She got shot in every mission and even died once, but she would never get used to the effect of sedatives.

She hated it when she woke up with nausea. It remained her of when she was pregnant. Carrying a child wasn't easy at all.

But it was worth it. Shepard smiled at the girl near her bed. Butterfly was sleeping on the chair, datapad in hands. She probably fell asleep while she was waiting for her mother to wake up.

Still smiling, Shepard pushed the datapad aside and carried Butterfly to bed. The girl stirred a little before snuggling the pillow.

Yes, it was worth it. She was terrified when she knew she was going to be a mother. But in hindsight, she didn't know why she feared it.

The mother kissed her child before leaving her to sleep. She noticed that the datapad was turning on.

Quietly, Kaidan walked in. He seemed tired but smiled that his girlfriend had finally woken up.

"Hey," he greeted.

"Hey yourself," she replied with a soft smile. And when Kaidan gently put his arms around her, she kissed him. "Am I dreaming? I have a wonderful daughter and a handsome boyfriend. How could this be real?"

"You're not dreaming, but that Doc probably gave you too much sedative. You would never say that if you were sober."

Who said Kaidan Alenko was humorless? Shepard giggled like a schoolgirl. Well, perhaps he was right. She felt drunk.

"I'll be fine. But what happened after I passed out? Is everyone alright?"

"Let's go talk downstairs. Everyone is waiting." The Major took the datapad from her hand. But noticed it was playing a fairly tale.

"Pinocchio is Butterfly's favorite book." He turned it off and placed it near the bed.

"I'm sure it's because you read it to her." Shepard teased. "I would like to hear you read it too." And then she sighed.

"What's wrong?"

Kaidan knew her too well. It was no use to lie or keep it from him. "I just thought I should spend more time with you two. I have wonderful family, but I'm always too busy. You are too good to me."

"Look, I'd love to spend more time with you too. But I also know we have so many problems to take care of. I would never blame you for that. Butterfly understands too." Gently, he cupped her face.

Shepard kissed his hand. What had she done to deserve a man like this? "I love you."

"I love you too." It was hard to fight the urge to kiss her. But he managed to keep his hands off her, at least for now. "Let's go downstairs before I carry you to another bedroom. Wrex wouldn't be happy if he'd have to wait any longer."

"After you, Major."

"So you could ogle my ass?"

Damn, he knew her too well. Shepard blushed as she punched his shoulder. "Move your asset downstairs, Major."

Kaidan didn't move. "I have to tell you something." He whispered.

"Is it anything important?"

"It's... Butterfly said she doesn't trust Brooks. And to be honest, I feel the same."

"What? But she saved my life, Kai. I think we can trust her." Still, her daughter has never behaved aggressively toward anyone. She couldn't just neglect it.

"I don't know, Amala. She is too... helpful. All the time she kept complaining about getting shot but she didn't even try to leave."

"Your trust issue," Shepard accused.

And that hit him in the right spot. "Yeah, my so-called issue."

"Hey, I didn't mean it's a bad thing." This could go badly. She tried to reassure him before they started another argument. "Perhaps I trust her too easily. We better hear her out before considering anything."

"You're right. Let's go see her. Wrex, Joker, and Zaeed are waiting in the living room too."

"Let's go." Shepard intertwined her hand with his.

* * *

It was two days after Horizon. Shepard was still angry at her ex-boyfriend but also understood why he reacted that way. Kaidan wasn't being unreasonable. Sometimes, she wondered in her existence as well.

Frustrated, she spent her time sparring with a practice dummy in the middle of night cycle. She thought she was alone until Zaeed cleared his throat.

She picked him up from Omega almost a week ago, but they hadn't had a conversation yet. Somehow the man reminded her of Clint Shepard, so she didn't want to talk to him unless it concerned the mission.

But that didn't mean he didn't want to talk to her.

"What do you want, Zaeed?" She asked harshly.

"Just curious. Everyone said you're the best but all I see is a woman. Without a gun and armor, you're nothing but a beautiful face." The mercenary stepped closer until he towered over the commander. He looked down at her threateningly.

"Oh, and what makes you think that?" She looked calm, but if Kaidan was there, he would say it was the calm before the storm.

"I saw you and that pretty boy. You didn't look so tough when he dumped you on Horizon. And after that, you locked yourself in your cabin for a day. I bet you cried yourself to sleep like a baby girl."

That was almost true, but she would never tell him.

"Now, now. Do you know what's ridiculous? You call yourself a mercenary, but you're talking like a gossiper. Cut this crap, Sandy. If you want to know my capability, let's fight."

She wanted to spar? He had no problem with that. Zaeed grabbed a tape and wrapped it around his hands. "Yeah, bring it on, Princess."

* * *

"Hey, calm down, Princess." At the best of his ability, James tried to soothe Butterfly down.

Angrily, the girl punched a practice dummy in the gym. Her fists hit the targets in an inhuman speed. The lieutenant flinched as she kicked the dummy's head, effectively cutting it off with her bare foot.

That helped. Butterfly finally calmed down. At least she calmed enough to talk. "Why can't I go? Aunty Liara ran a trace on the gun and found the casino owner who sold the gun to that thief. Why can't I help storming his hideout? Mommy just wants to go there with daddy and _'her'_."

James sighed. They had talked about this for awhile now. "It's a quiet job. Small group. No gunplay. We don't want to alert the whole casino and our target. Khan would probably flee before we talked to him if we aren't careful."

"I can help hack his panic room. Why does mommy never let me? Does she..."

_Does she trust me?_ James knew what she wanted to say. "Hey, Lola just doesn't want to put you at risk. You would have to sneak into the shaft to hack the system. Besides, they need somebody who's trained in zero-emissions tech. No electronics, no metal. Brooks is perfect for the job."

Butterfly pouted. "I can do it."

Could stubbornness run in the family? James felt the beginning of a headache. "If you still can't act like a professional, you aren't ready for the job."

That got her. Butterfly bit her lip like a child as she ran to the upper floor. She probably went back to her room to cry, but the lieutenant had the feeling it wasn't that simple.

In the game room, most of the crew was listening. Even though EDI and Liara were contacting Shepard via comm link they still worried about the girl.

"Should I bring her outside? I'd like to show her my favorite spot. We can shoot some bottles. It might cool her down." Garrus offered.

"Like you and Shepard did the other day?" Wrex asked. "You guys made C-Sec nervous. I like it."

The turian shrugged. "Just wanted to do what I want while still having a chance. We shot bottles, and I won."

"I bet she missed that bottle on purpose." The krogan shrugged back.

"Forget shooting bottles. That would attract too much attention. The last thing Shepard and Butterfly want right now is public attention." Joker pointed at the screen in the living room. "That reporter did a scoop on Shepard's love life for a month. I don't want to think what would happen when Shepard finds out."

"But we can't leave her like that." Cortez disagreed. "Do you have any ideas, Traynor?"

"Umm, we girls can have a sleepover. I bet Butterfly has never had the experience. It could be fun." The specialist suggested.

"It could wait." Liara was still busy with her terminal. Glyph and EDI were assisting her. "Everything is going according to our plan. Shepard, Kaidan, and Brooks used the charity party tickets and are in the casino already. Now, Brooks has to go into that shaft and bypass the casino's security system."

"So they can sneak into Khan's panic room." Zaeed didn't seem excited. Infiltrating wasn't his thing.

"And we will eliminate whoever tried to kill the Commander. That is the real fun." Javik sighed. He was fidgeting in his seat while everyone was talking.

"What's wrong, Fossil? You look uncomfortable." James joined them. He didn't like the Prothean because he always looked at Butterfly like she was a banshee or worse.

Four eyes stared at the human furiously. "Do not call me that, Primitive."

"Call me whatever you want. If that would help you feel better." Shrugged, James snapping back quickly.

Although he denied it, Javik did want to talk to someone sometimes. "Her presence is too... intense. If I am not careful, I will see her."

"What the hell this guy is talking about?" The mercenary asked.

"He is a prothean. He has a special sense that allows him to read data from an object or people." As a Prothean expert, Liara explained.

"Then, what's wrong with seeing Butterfly. The little angel is a sight for sore eyes."

"Little angel?" Garrus chuckled. "You already fell for Butterfly, didn't you? I didn't know a guy like you would ever say something like that."

"Nah, she is lovely. Only an idiot would not see it. Though, this guy didn't answer my question." Zaeed's eyes locked on the Prothean. He wouldn't let this topic slide.

Neither would the rest of the crew. Javik knew he had to answer.

"When I use my special sense, I see things differently. Normally, I can understand them. But that thing... I saw Butterfly as the image of the universe."

"What do you mean 'image of the universe'?" Joker asked, but everyone wondered about that too.

But the Prothean wondered if these primitives would ever understand him. "I said I see things as images, symbols. When I read her inner-self, I saw the universe. She has so much data and her dark energy is so... intense. I can sense it from here. It makes me feel uncomfortable."

"Not sure I understand." Wrex shook his head. "But Bakara once said something like this. She said everyone is part of the universe, but Butterfly is harmonizing with the universe. Don't ask me what she meant. I don't understand it either."

Everyone swallowed hard. They knew their niece wasn't a normal human child, but none of them wanted to said it out loud.

"That's not important." Taking a deep breath, James broke the silence. "She is my princess. That's all I care."

"Me too." Garrus agreed. "And I don't think we should continue this subject. Are they finished hacking, Liara?"

EDI and Glyph were busy helping Brooks hack the casino's system. They didn't join the crew's conversation until Garrus asked them.

"Staff analyst Brooks is disabling the alarm. It is going to shut down in... Wait." The synthetic stepped away from the terminal in shock as the data flooded into Shadow Broker's server.

"Keelah, what's this?" Tali exclaimed

"Financial records of Khan this month." Still unsure of the situation, Liara sounded breathless. "Look, that's an order for weapons and armor. He smuggled them to the Citadel like the news I had received."

The Citadel was the safest place in the galaxy right now, but the former C-Sec officer knew this station wasn't as secure as everyone thought. "With enough money, you can get anything in the Citadel. Still, guns are harmless without the people who hold them. Do you know these mercenaries?"

Liara already had the answer for her turian friend. "They are a private military corporation called CAT6, which as you probably know, is an Alliance nickname for dishonorable discharge. Many have criminal records, histories of steroid abuse, and other charming features. No doubt hired by the thief, not Khan."

"They're humanity's shame, like Cerberus." Even James knew about them.

"And hiring them isn't cheap. Our thief must be rich. I don't understand why they want Shepard's identity?" The shuttle pilot wondered. "I mean... There are other high ranking soldiers, other Spectres. Why choose to steal Shepard's military access and Spectre code? The whole galaxy knows Shepard's leading the resistance against the Reapers. We need her to win the war."

"More indoctrinated troops?" suggested Tali. "We know the Reapers are tricky."

"Wait," the asari gestured them to quiet as EDI brought a vid on screen. "This is live feed from the casino's security camera. Someone is sending it to us. Look, that's Khan!"

The man was sitting in his luxury panic room. He suddenly looked up from his monitor as if he saw someone off screen. And then, he was shot.

Everyone gasped. From the feed, they saw Khan's terminal explode. Someone overloaded it from afar. The camera didn't capture the picture of the attacker.

"The way is clear." Just a few minutes later, Shepard informed them. She probably didn't know what happened inside the panic room. "We're going in."

Shocked, Liara didn't reply. She just stared as the feed showed Shepard and her team walking towards the man in the chair. At first, they didn't notice the blood because Khan's shirt was crimson red. The Commander knew he was dead when she got closer.

"Someone got to him before us. Damn it."

Panicked, Brooks covered her mouth with her hands. "Was it because I tripped that alarm? I screwed up! I knew I would."

"Calm down, Brooks." While Shepard was angry, Brooks upset, Kaidan was still calm. "Khan can't tell us anything now. We have to look for a clue... Is his computer still working?"

"I'm not sure. Let's give it a try."

The Major reset the computer. As soon as it finished rebooting, the terminal replayed he last call.

Someone answered it. The holo they saw in the screen was damaged. Even the voice sounded unnatural, probably disguised.

"Elijah. Come crawling back?"

"Guess again," said Shepard. She was rather sure this was the identity thief.

Kaidan froze. He felt tainted listening to that voice. It reminded him of Arachne and... the woman who tried to capture him and Butterfly.

"Oh, the great Commander Shepard." The thief mocked. "I see you've recovered from flopping on the floor like a fish."

Grinding her teeth, Shepard tried to calm down. Losing her head didn't help after all. "You'll need to do better than that. The last guy who trash talk me was a few kilometers taller than you."

She heard the thief laugh. "Brave is another word for stupid. Try to find me if you want, but it won't change anything. The hammer will fall and you will be crushed."

Her life wasn't smooth. Shepard knew she had done a lot of bad things. It was no surprise that people would hate her. But she didn't understand why this person hated her this much. Was the thief someone in her past?

"Why do this? What did I do to you?"

"Doesn't matter. Just know that I'm going to take everything you have and everything you are."

The connection was cut. Shepard swallowed hard as her eyes fell to Kaidan. The mercenaries that tried to kidnap the Major and his daughter were CAT6. It was possible the thief was behind all this.

"That thief... He or she tried to steal you." Her voice cracked. She feared for him, but was mostly furious.

The other woman didn't seem to notice. She was busy with her tool and then cursed. "Damn, There was not enough time to trace the call."

Kaidan was going to say something but his tool pinged. He checked the message while his girlfriend turned the computer off.

"What are you doing, Commander?" The staff analyst asked.

"Take this back to our base. EDI and Glyph might be able to get something useful from it."

"But it just..."

The computer sparked, almost shocking Shepard.

"Be careful," Kaidan took his jacket off and wrapped it around the broken computer. He looked great in casual clothes but it was hotter when he was in his shirt.

_Don't be silly, Amala._ The Commander berated herself. _This isn't the time. You can ravish him later._

"Let's get out of here." She ordered. "Liara, where is the emergency exit?"

The asari flinched. She didn't realize she was holding her breath while watching the live feed. "Yes, I'll upload the map. But they probably have guards stationed there. Be careful."

"Noted," And then they left the panic room.

Shepard's apartment fell to silence. The only sound in the house was Liara's fingers working on her terminal.

"That thief wants to steal everything Lola has, including the Major and the Princess?" James exclaimed. "That sounds... sick."

"But why?" The quarian wondered.

No one knew. Still, Garrus wanted to know something else. "Zaeed, can you tell us what happened when Alenko and Butterfly were captured?"

The mercenary was surprised, but happy to oblige. "Alright. It began when the cab dropped them..."

* * *

I think this chapter is a bit too long, so I split it to two chapters. The rescue will be in the next chapter.

And of course, I can't finish this chapter without The Lonely Traveler, my beta.


	53. Doubt

"A doubtful friend is worse than a certain enemy. Let a man be one thing or the other, and we then know how to meet him."

―_Aesop, Aesop's Fables_

* * *

**Doubt**

* * *

No matter how far humanity goes, the ego is still the ego. Not every male likes to serve under a female... no pun intended.

And Javik was probably right to call them primitives. She had to show him her strength to earn Zaeed's respect. That day, Shepard broke his nose, three of his ribs, and his left arm in hand-to-hand sparring.

Ever since, he learned a priceless lesson: do not underestimate the Shepard girl again.

And the first time he laid his eyes on Butterfly, he knew she was another Shepard. She looked very similar to the Commander and although she was surrounded by fully armed mercenaries, she still had the eyes that said,_touch me and you'll be fucking dead._

She only tilted her eyebrow when her daddy said he would surrender.

"Are you kidding me?"

Kaidan nodded. "I don't want to risk your life."

"Wise decision," a woman in light armor praised him. She gestured her men to lower their guns. However, her voice sounded creepier when she ordered. "Bind their hands."

"Dad..." The girl was growling now. "If mommy knows..."

"Everything will be alright." The Major touched the tip of his nose. "It will be like in your favorite tale."

Butterfly blinked, suddenly realizing. "Oh, right! It's going to be ok."

Two mercenaries walked towards them. But as soon as they laid their hands on her, she threw the guy to the floor and shot him with his own gun that she snatched from him. The Major had done the same. He also threw reave at a man who tried to shoot them.

"I'd surrender if we were unarmed. But we're biotics. We're never unarmed." Kaidan winked at the angry woman.

"Shit! Put them down, idiots. Use a tranquilizer." The woman cursed and then ran to the waiting shuttle.

_Not so brave, that woman._ Zaeed thought. He hated this kind of people.

Butterfly activated her annihilation field. It burned everyone near her except her dad. When she shot them with throw, it caused a biotic explosion. In the small area, that created a chaos.

Unknown by the father and child, Zaeed and his friend were hiding in the far range. The man aimed his sniper at the girl but Zaeed shot him down. "Sorry, but I won't let anyone hurt the Shepards."

Kaidan and Butterfly fought fiercely, but there were too many enemies. Zaeed shot those snipers down as the two were taking care of mercenaries in close combat. Once, Butterfly punched a guy and shot her biotics from her fist at the same time, which sent the target flying away like a ragged doll.

"Wow, you can do that better than your mom!" The Major praised.

"Thanks, daddy. But I have a bad feeling..." She shot dark energy at the last enemy. It killed him almost instantly. "I can feel. Mommy is in danger."

Kaidan didn't have time to ask. A man in armor walked towards them, still handing a rifle. The big scar on his face was threatening but he didn't look hostile. In fact, he seemed very relaxed like a lion in its territory. The older man puffed smoke off his mouth, causing Butterfly to sneeze. He threw it away.

"I remember you, Shepard's pretty boy." He pointed.

When the guy dropped Shepard's name, Kaidan lower his gun but still flared his biotics. "Who are you?"

"Zaeed Massani. I worked with Shepard during the suicide mission." He didn't offer a handshake, though. "Who's that girl?"

Kaidan Alenko didn't trust easily. "How can I know you aren't an enemy?"

Unlike others, Zaeed understood Kaidan's trust issue. He had the same problem since his old friend shot him in the face. "Shepard can answer it."

"Right. I'll call Shepard."

But before he could do that, Joker was on the line. "Emergency, Kaidan. Shepard needs backup."

"What... What's happened?" He didn't hear the shooting or fighting in the background, so Joker must have been in a safe place. "Aren't you two at the Sushi bar? Shepard needs help ordering her dinner or something?"

"It isn't funny." He could see Joker's eyes roll. "There are these guys. They have a lot of guns and they started shooting. And yeah, Shepard used me as bait!"

"Easy, Joker. Calm down and tell me what happened."

"I... Ok. Shepard and I were at the bar when a staff analyst named Brooks came to see us. She said something about someone trying to steal Shepard's personal data. That's when those guys marched into the bar and started shooting."

"Damn! What about Shepard? Is she with you now?" The mercenaries in the bar were probably involved with the men who attacked him and Butterfly. Someone was targeting his family, Kaidan couldn't stand it.

"She helped me escape so I can call you and the others. Liara probably already knows about it, though."

_Can't Amala spend shore leave like other marines?_ He wondered. "It's time for us to save the day, then. Do you know where she is?"

"I tried to locate her but the channel is blocked. I'll call Brooks. She might know something."

Butterfly grabbed her father's arm. "I know where mommy is."

That sounded impossible. But Kaidan knew his daughter too well to doubt in her words or ability. "Alright. We'll go rescue her together. But first, we need weapons and armor."

"The Normandy is there." Zaeed pointed helpfully. "I bet you guys can find everything you need there."

For a minute, the Major debated with himself if he should trust Zaeed. In the end, he decided to take a risk.

"Will you come with us?"

The older man stared at them as if he didn't believe his ears. Eventually, he smiled. "Why not? I have nothing to do anyway."

* * *

"And then we went to the Normandy. They grabbed their guns and armor before taking off to find Shepard. I don't know how, but the Angel really knew where she was. We made it to the skycar lot just in time to save our Commander's ass."

Zaeed cleared his throat. Traynor hurriedly poured him another drink. He murmured thanks to her.

"When I saw that shuttle arrive, my gut warned me that we couldn't just leave so easily. So I jumped behind cover before those mercs began shooting. I didn't get shot." The old man bragged.

"And you hid behind cover when I showed up. Krogan airdrop on that shuttle and then got rid of those bastards, with my bare hands." Wrex boasted.

"You have talons. Your hands are also weapons." James protested. "But I'd like to see a krogan airdrop. It must be awesome."

The krogan laughed. He never got bored listening to compliments. "Of course it was. I did it."

"But you would have had a bad time if I hadn't driven the Kodiak to pick you guys up." Protested Joker. "I made my way, avoided the lockdown, and saved you. I think I am the one who saved the day."

"Um, but I still wonder. Why there was no news about the shooting in the sushi bar in the news channels or extranet?" Before the guys began fighting, Traynor changed the subject.

"Don't know. Someone covered it up, perhaps." Wrex guessed.

"The council probably wants to keep it as quiet as possible. People won't trust the Citadel is safe if there are people with guns walking around, shooting the innocent." The ex C-Sec officer huffed. "And C-Sec has to do their dirty job."

"Does that mean we have to take care of this thief by ourselves? Not that I'm complaining. Just curious." James still worried. He didn't mind fighting but he knew Butterfly would go with them if it was the case. If he could help it, he didn't want to drag her to the fight.

"I'm afraid so. Commander Shepard doesn't want to push more people in danger. Anyway, I can't help with that..." Traynor said, but she didn't finish her sentence because the team made it back safety with Khan's computer.

And then, another mission began.

* * *

"You have to be kidding." James exclaimed as he saw their destination.

As EDI hacked the door and everyone kept their eyes on her, Shepard took a deep breath. James was right. The Archives was massive for a place that kept the council's important information. They sealed the place from people, only high-ranking officers were allowed to enter. Although it kept her data as a Spectre, she had never set foot in the place or even know about it.

But EDI found her nemesis' trace there. The thief and the gang were locked down by the Archives' security system. It was her best and only chance to end the problem once and for all.

Would it be that easy? She wasn't sure.

A hand touched her arm. Shepard looked up to see Butterfly smiling at her. The Commander didn't want to bring her daughter with her, but she didn't have many choices. Besides, the girl insisted to come along.

Smiling back, Shepard touched Butterfly's forehead with hers. She always did this with Kaidan before a mission. It was like a ritual and her way to say; 'I love you' and 'be careful'.

"We will order the biggest pizza for dinner tonight." Somehow her heart felt heavy, but she tried to reassure the girl. "Everyone will have dinner with us. A party."

"We will, mom... Commander." Butterfly corrected herself. In the mission, she had to call Shepard by rank. It was their agreement.

"Good." Something caught in her throat, she couldn't say more.

The security system couldn't match EDI's magic. Not waiting long, the door was opened. Shepard gave her crew a speech one last time before the mission.

Most of her crew except Traynor who was called back to the Normandy and Joker who wasn't in condition to fight was there, waiting for her order.

"Alright. We will spilt to two teams. Kaidan, B, James, Brooks, Cortez and Zaeed will be Mako team. The rest come with me. We're Kodiak team." The Commander gave the order. She knew the Major would look after their daughter.

Butterfly opened her mouth to protest, but James gave her a side glare, reminding her to act like an adult. So she just nodded. "Aye, ma'am."

The Kodiak team moved first. The other team followed and watched their rear. All the time, the Major couldn't help but look after his daughter. After all, he was a father, and as a father he didn't want his daughter to get hurt.

And that's why he was distracted when it began.

The Mako team was on the balcony as the Kodiak team walked under it. Butterfly looked through her sniper scope and saw the movement ahead, so Shepard and squad went to investigate.

And then... BOOM!

The ceiling over Shepard's head collapsed by the explosive. It happened so fast. Kaidan almost didn't have time to react as Butterfly tried to climb above the fence. Involuntarily, the girl tried to jump down but James pulled her back.

"Let's go of me! I have to help her." Crying, Butterfly struggled hard.

"Are you crazy? You will get hurt or even kill yourself if you jump down from this height." The lieutenant shouted.

She knew he was right. It wasn't easy to accept. Butterfly was trembling all over as she cried. "But... But mommy..."

"You're Commander Shepard's daughter?" Brooks exclaimed, staring at the Major as if she was asking the question.

But Kaidan didn't care. He just waved the staff analyst off to fiddle with his Omni-tool. "Amala, do you read me? God, don't you dare leave us."

They heard only silence for awhile. But finally Kaidan's tool glowed as it received the response.

"I read you. I'm fine. Everyone is fine. Just a few bruises and scratches." Shepard answered the call. Her breathing sounded heavy. She probably sprint as fast as she able to escape the collapse.

Mako team let out a breath they didn't realize they were holding. Butterfly sobbed quietly and placed her face on James' chest. Her father saw it but let it slip for once.

"But it seems you have to find another way to get inside." That suggestion attracted his attention. Shepard sent him a plan of the building. "According to this plan, you can crawl through the vent. It's a bit complicated but Glyph can guide you. I'll send him to you right now."

"I have to go through a vent again?" Brooks complained, but she sounded desperate.

"Well, that's good, we are all slim." Cortez shrugged.

* * *

Glyph was a great assistant when you needed to manage a lot of information or analyze them, but he was almost useless guiding people. The bot knew the way, of course. But he often led them the way that only a bot was able to pass. It took long time until Mako team got out of the vent.

As soon as they reached the exit, Glyph suddenly disappeared, despite James' call.

They didn't contact the other team when they were in the vent, so they were surprised by the disaster in the Archives.

There was a trace of another explosion. The floor and wall were burned although the auto fire-extinguisher put the fire out. Around the area, there were a lot of bodies. All of them wore CAT6 armors. No trace of the Kodiak team.

"Shepard did it, perhaps?" Zaeed didn't sound so sure though.

Brooks looked around, still jumpy. "Where is the Commander? I won't assume anything until we find her."

Ignoring the comments, Kaidan tried to call Shepard via her tool but received no response. The signal was blocked.

"Alright. Let's find her and the others. Start looking around here. If she isn't here, we will move further along." He ordered and everyone followed.

As everyone separated, the Major called his daughter. "Can you locate her, Princess?"

Butterfly closed her eyes and took a deep breath. "It's... clouded. Mommy isn't feeling so well. She is trapped."

"Where is she?"

"She is..." Her words were cut by Brooks yelling.

"Found her. I found the Commander!"

And then they sprinted to Brooks, forgetting about what they were talking about. They saw Brooks sitting near an unconscious Shepard. Kaidan hurried to check on her, worrying. He found a fatal wound on her head.

Her light skin was pale in comparison with the crimson blood on her face and body. Every inch of her skin that wasn't protected by armor was cut by shattered glass. She had lost too much blood.

"We have to get her to the hospital." The Major's voice cracked. This was too much for a field medic to heal. He was scared he might lose her again.

"But what about the others? We still haven't found them." Cortez asked.

"Butterfly and I will take her to the hospital. You guys stay here, search for them. According to the plan of the Archives, there's another way out. We'll go that way and call Joker. The signal outside probably isn't blocked." Kaidan gave the plan to everyone. "Two hours. If you guys don't find them in two hours, inform me. I'll call Bailey for help. C-Sec is better in searching than fighting."

"Wait, can I come along?" Brooks raised her hand.

"No." Butterfly refused harshly.

As the family rushed to the exit, they didn't hear Brooks murmur angrily. "Good luck with your new mommy."

* * *

Although Thane loved silence and peace, it didn't mean he didn't appreciate visitors, especially a visitor like the justicar Samara. Before marching to war, the asari spent time taking care of unfinished businesses. As a friend, she paid him a visit.

It was a strange visitation, really. They barely talked, just sat in silence and observed the sky.

Until another guest arrived.

"Thane, can I talk..." A girl in armor walked into the room. However, she stopped as she saw the justicar. "Sorry. I didn't see you have a guest. I'll come back later."

"It is alright, Atma." Thane said. "This is Samara. She was with Commander Shepard during the mission to stop the Collectors."

"Mommy's friend? Oh, sorry I didn't introduce myself. People call me Butterfly." She offered her hand.

As she shook the hand, Samara stared at the girl intently. "My name is Samara. I can see the resemblance. You look very much like Shepard. But your eyes remind me of someone else... The man I saw at the monastery."

"That's my dad, Major Alenko. Everyone says I got his eyes and smile." Butterfly said proudly. Her mood seemed lighter.

"You are the fruit of true love, I can tell. I am also able to say you are having a problem and seeking advise. Very wise asking it from a wise man." Praised the asari.

"How did you know?" The change of subject made her feel uncomfortable. Her hands entwined together.

Chuckling softly, the justicar gently pulled her to sit down on the chair nearby. "Even for asari standard, I am very old. I know a lot of young people like you."

Butterfly didn't look so sure. She stared at the drell as if she was asking him.

"Siha trust her. You can trust her as well." Thane assured.

Still, the girl hesitated. But eventually, she talked. "Yes, I'm having a problem. My... Commander Shepard got hurt during a mission. She is alright now. But I... It's absurd, I know. She has the same face, voice, handprint, and DNA. She has everything my mom has but the memory... But I can feel it."

Both Thane and Samara were very patient. They waited quietly for the human to speak her mind.

"She isn't my mom."

* * *

Thank for reading and thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta. :D


	54. Perfection

"Just because you're beautiful and perfect, it's made you conceited."

_- William Goldman, The Princess Bride_

* * *

**Perfection**

* * *

Kaidan was a gentleman and Shepard didn't mind taking advantage of him. She let him carry her from the landing pad to their bedroom, ignoring Butterfly's unappreciated glare.

Shepard didn't care, but he did. The tension in the air was so thick he was almost able to cut it with a knife.

It started when Shepard woke up after her injury. She couldn't remember anyone even Butterfly. Kaidan would never forget when she looked at him with a blank stare. The eyes were... so odd. He almost thought this woman wasn't his Amala.

Butterfly took it harder than him. She flinched away when Shepard tried to touch her. And the way she glared at her mother... She was absolutely not like the amnesiac Commander.

Sighing, the Major placed his girlfriend on the bed gently. He was going to leave, but he was trapped within Shepard's embrace.

"I need you." She said it simply. Her voice sounded seductive but also sounded... fake.

"You need rest." He tried not to sound offended. "And I still have to cook dinner. You haven't eaten anything today. Let me cook you something special."

There was a flash of frustration in her eyes, but quickly faded as she smiled weakly. "Hospital food is terrible. You're such a lifesaver."

A chill ran down his spine. Kaidan automatically turned around, looking for an enemy but he found no one. And although the windows were opened, the nearest building was still too far to observe the apartment.

"What's wrong, Kaidan?"

Shepard called his name countless times, why did he feel strange?

"Nothing." He shook his head. "I just remember we didn't buy any fresh food. Can you stay here alone while I go shopping? I won't be long."

"I'll be fine." Her soft smile made him feel bad for doubting her behavior. "Butterfly will be here with me, right?"

"Yeah, she will. But I still worry. Should I call your friends? I mean... You can't remember what happened in the Archives, what if that thief is still alive? I don't want to leave you defenseless. And Samara is..."

"Since half of my stupid crew is dead, she wanted to assist me anyway she's able." Shepard huffed. "But I don't want her... I mean, I can't remember her. She is like a stranger."

Kaidan gasped. Her voice was so cold when she talked about their lost comrades. Amnesia or not, this didn't sound like his Amala at all.

"Amala!" He warned sternly. "Please don't say that, especially in front of Butterfly. She still can't accept she lost her aunts and uncles. God, they died trying to help you. Don't talk about them like that!"

Shepard looked like she was about to throw him out of the room. However, she just lay back on the bed. "I want to be alone."

That would be best. Kaidan didn't want to push her.

"See you later." And then he walked out.

There was a sound of something broken behind him, but he just didn't care. The Major left the master bedroom to see his daughter in another bedroom.

Butterfly didn't look so good. Her eyes were red and had remnants of tears on her cheeks. For a baby, she didn't like crying for long no matter how miserable. She just sat on her bed, arms around her knees.

"Daddy," she said as she saw him. Her voice wasn't louder than a whisper and trembled.

Kaidan slowly sat near her. "Come here, Princess."

She almost leaped into his arms, but not in merriment. Quietly, she snuggled on his chest as he held and smoothed her hair.

"I still can't believe they're gone."

"Me, neither." He tried not to cry. Losing so many comrades in one fight was so damn painful. "Garrus, Wrex, Tali, and Liara... They were with us from the beginning. This is worse than losing Ash."

"James said he found them in a sealed vault. They ran out of air before the rescue. But... But Aunty EDI doesn't need air. How could she...? There's something wrong, dad, very wrong."

"Synthetics aren't invincible. EDI was disabled. The Alliance's engineers are trying to figure out how to revive her. Besides, why would James lie to us?" He didn't like it, but he had to admit the hulk lieutenant seemed to like his daughter more than family. James would never want to hurt her, neither physically or mentally.

"I... I don't know. It's just not right. They were trapped and died in that vault like a mouse. It was a stupid way to die."

"Sometimes... It's just bad luck." He remembered he told Shepard that just after they lost Jenkins. And the thought of the lost comrade made him feel worse.

As if she could read his mind, Butterfly wiped the tears from her face. "We can't break down, right? They want us to be strong. We will win this war for them."

Even though she said that, Kaidan wasn't sure if she was over her grief. "Yes, we will. Since we lost so many people, your mommy is going to work harder. We will help her in anyway we are able, alright?"

But the girl shook her head. "No! That woman isn't mommy."

"Princess, I know Amala looks strange. But that's because she lost her memories."

"How could you know? She could be an impostor. At the hospital, everyone paid her a visit, but she just dismissed them. Mommy never treated anyone rudely like that."

Sighing and pinching the bridge of his nose, he felt the beginnings of a migraine. "Dr. Michel already did scan her. She has Amala's voice, fingerprints, and DNA. Physically, she is Amala Shepard. You know it."

"Yeah but... Mommy has scars, right? Does she have those scars?"

"The new one she got was a bit nasty, so Shepard wanted it removed. But the machine didn't just remove one scar. It removed every scar on her body."

Butterfly made a funny face, which reminded him of Shepard. "Isn't that a bit convenient?"

God knew he thought the same, but he couldn't just confront Shepard. "I know what you mean. This is between you and me, ok? I think this situation is strange too, but we can't do anything if we don't have proof."

"Yes, you're right. We need proof." Butterfly seemed to forget her grief. Her eyes shone with eagerness. "What are we going to do?"

"I already ordered James, Cortez, and Zaeed to gather old friends of your mom. Jack and Grunt are already there. I told that woman, I'm going shopping, but I'll go meet them at our old place. Someone has to keep an eye on that woman, while I'm out."

He was asking. Not gladly, but Butterfly would do it. "I'll do it. Mommy is still alive, I know it. And we have to find her."

"And keep it quiet." Half of his heart still wondered if they were wrong. There was no solid evidence to prove his suspicions. Still, he couldn't just let it go. "I know it won't be easy, but you have to play nice, and be careful. If she isn't your mom, she could be dangerous. Dad can't live if anything happens to you and your mom."

Butterfly smiled sadly and hugged him.

* * *

The room was a mess. Vase, photo frame, and everything on the night tables and shelves was wiped from their places. Shards of glass and ceramic shattered on the dark carpet like an abstract painting.

Carefully, Butterfly entered the room. Inside, the light was turned off but the light from outside illuminated the room enough to show a silhouette of a small woman on the bed. She wasn't sleeping, though.

Shepard... or someone who looked like her was sitting, hugging her knees, and face down between both arms. She looked fragile, exhausted and... very different from Butterfly's mom.

But the girl wasn't sure if it was in a good or bad way.

"Umm, hello," Butterfly tried to make conversation. She didn't know what she should call the Commander's doppelganger.

The woman jumped a little but didn't move. She just looked up and smiled wearily. There was sadness in her eyes but there wasn't any trace of tears. "Hey, little girl."

That voice sounded very much like Shepard. It hurt to hear those words when she knew this woman was just an imposter. Butterfly almost ran away.

But she couldn't do that.

"I, err... Just want to know how you are doing."

"I'm Commander Shepard. I'm always fine." She sounded very sure of herself. "What about you? Still think I am someone else?"

Butterfly sighed. "It isn't easy."

She didn't give a straight answer, but the Commander had her own idea. "Can we talk?"

"Yes, sure."

"I can't remember what kind of mother I was, but I swear I'll do anything to become better, a perfect mother." If the light didn't play tricks on her, the girl thought she saw Shepard snarl.

And she didn't like it. "I don't want a perfect mom. I just want my mom."

"And I'll be your perfect mom." Still, the older woman insisted. "Look at me, Sweetheart. I am flawless. I'll make us, our family happier. Forget your old, pathetic mom. She is no more."

Shocked, Butterfly stiffened as the Commander hugged her.

"Everything is going to be alright."

* * *

"You should know by now that thinking isn't my thing." Said Grunt. He answered Kaidan's call and came to Shepard's old apartment as soon as he was able. However, he had no idea where they should begin their investigation.

The Major looked around the room. Shepard and his friends were here. Even Kasumi came as soon as possible. Well, the master thief probably came because Jacob was there, but she came.

"With the Archives sealed by C-Sec, we can't check the place for any evidence." The thief said.

"I thought you could go anywhere." Jack teased.

"Of course I can. But I don't know what we are looking for."

Damn right. Before they could do anything, they needed a plan. Kaidan sighed. "Anyone have any ideas? Shepard needs our help, but we don't even know how to start."

"Calm down, Major." Among them, Samara was the oldest. Her presence soothed everyone down. "First, we have to know our enemy. Who is that woman? How could she have Shepard's DNA?"

That wasn't a hard question for a man who had three cloned daughters. "A clone, probably. And before you ask, I think Cerberus did it."

"Cerberus has Shepard's DNA and they are capable of cloning humans. I agreed that they might have created a clone. But we can't forget the identity thief." Jacob warned him.

"Well, I don't have any proof. But if that woman isn't Shepard, she probably is the thief." Kaidan was rather sure about that. "The clone tried to kill the original to claim his life. It's a plot from one of my favorite movies."

"Wait a minute." Kasumi protested. "But the thief hired CAT6 units to help her, right? Why didn't she use Cerberus' troop if she was with them?"

"Just because they created her, doesn't mean she has to work for them." Said Joker. He was very quiet after the loss of EDI, but he still wanted to help. Although he couldn't fight, he would do anything to bring EDI's murderer to justice.

James couldn't help but compare Shepard's clone to Butterfly and her sisters. The trio was young but their lives were so complicated. "The Illusive Man is always up to something. He probably created the clone to use as spares, in case Shepard needed new arms or something."

"And how come you know so much, Meat?" Jack asked, not so kind.

The lieutenant scratched his head awkwardly. "I... just thinking. I have a brain too, you know?"

Jack was Jack. She said what she wanted to say. "Didn't know you grew one."

He should be angry, but he was distracted by Jack's exposed chest. Despite his experience, he rarely met a hot woman like her. Well, Shepard and her children were kind of hot too, but they were... different.

"We must expose her true identity. But if she is the clone, her physical body must be similar to Shepard's. How can we prove she isn't Shepard?" Ignoring the biotic chick, Kasumi brought the conversation back to the old subject.

"It would be a lot easier if we have a doctor or scientist with us." Cortez offered.

Kaidan's omni-tool pinged. It was a message from Butterfly. He worried if she needed help so he hurriedly opened it up.

"Butterfly sent you a message?" Jack almost cooed. "What did she say?"

It was only two words.

_Cybernetic implant._

* * *

Butterfly always spoke in ridden, didn't she? And I just keep hanging my readers on the cliff. XD Sorry about that.

Thank to The Lonely Traveler for beta :D


	55. Love fool

"You can fool some of people all the time, and all of the people for some of the time, but you can not fool all of the people all of the time."  
_- Abraham Lincoln_

* * *

**Love Fool**

* * *

An important job and high pay always came with a price. Sometimes, Dr. Chloe Michel missed her old days in the clinic. She had a lot of time for herself those days.

Working in the hospital was a lot safer than the ward. She avoided getting caught in the crossfire. Everyday, she came to the hospital early morning and returned home until late in the night. In time of war, the hospital was more and more crowded.

Her routine was boring. She was exhausted sometimes, but she loved her job.

Most of it, however.

It was almost midnight when she called a cab. Her eyelids were so heavy, she couldn't keep them open. She just gave her address to the driver and then took a nap.

She didn't notice the gun near the driver's seat.

* * *

"Are you alright, Meat?" Asked Jack. She didn't worry about the lieutenant's welfare, but was annoyed, he kept fidgeting all the time.

James took a deep breath and then looked out the window. They were inside Dr. Michel's apartment, waiting for her to return. It was 1:30 in the morning, but the doctor still hadn't shown up.

"The last time I was in charge, things didn't turn out well. Truth be told, I still can't believe the Major would trust me to do this."

"You'll be N7, right? Get use to it." Via the comm link, Cortez suggested.

"He gave you this mission only because he couldn't do it himself." The tattoo girl teased. "He had to go back to Shepard's apartment, so that impostor wouldn't suspect anything."

"I hope the doc won't mind finding us in her apartment." Ignoring her, James said to no one in particular.

"In other circumstances, I would not agree with trespassing. But we do it to save the innocent." Samara said. She killed time meditating, but still joined the conversation.

From nowhere, Kasumi's voice rang. "Yep, Dr. Michel will be in danger. Like Major Alenko said, the clone probably didn't have cybernetic implants like the real Shep. And the only one who can confirm it was the doctor who healed the clone."

James sighed. He brought the thief along because she was the expert in tech and trespassing but she kept her cloak on all the time, which creeped him out. "Can't you just sit down and talk to us like normal people?"

"Why would I do that?" The thief was still hiding.

"Let's it go, man." From the comm, Joker said. "The hospital staff said Dr. Michel left the place before midnight. It's been an hour but she still hasn't shown up. What if..."

Excluding Kaidan who had to return to Shepard's apartment, the rest of the team was in Shepard's old place because the large group brought too much attention.

Although James was surrounded by three women, he didn't enjoy it. Joker probably told Jack that the lieutenant was sweet on Butterfly, so Aunty Jack kept giving him a hard time. Samara kept her words to herself. And Kasumi just kept hiding.

How could Shepard work with these people?

"I... er, I think you guys should take a ride. I mean... You should look for the doc on her way home. My team will stay here just in case. Call me any time."

"Got it."

He just cut the line when someone knocked on the door. Jack and Samara unsheathed their guns instantly.

"Hey, that could be Dr. Michel!" James stopped them.

"Who would knock on their own door?" To his surprise, it was Jack who answered him. As she saw his face, she shrugged and said. "Just because I'm crazy, doesn't mean I'm stupid."

He wasn't going to argue with her. "I think we should take cover. Just in case."

The red circle interface of the door began to spin. That meant somebody was hacking it. Kasumi locked it after they entered the room but that was only buying them time. So the team jumped behind cover, (he couldn't see the thief, but he guessed she did.) ready for the intruders.

As soon as the door opened, people in front of the door shot the gun around as if they wanted to kill everyone inside. The tempest of bullets destroyed everything in its wake. James was glad he and the team hid.

It was a good long while until they stopped shooting. The lieutenant heard the sound of reloading rifles so he shouted.

"Get them!"

The intruders were busying reloading their guns, and were taken by surprise. They weren't a match for the three women who worked together like professionals. James almost didn't have a chance to shoot a single shot. A Justicar, a biotic chick, and a master thief took them out single-handedly.

The lieutenant could only look as the women began searching the bodies.

"Hey, Meat! I think they're CAT6." Jack said, very happy like a girl who had a new toy. She lifted the last living mercenary with her biotics but James stopped her.

"We need information. Don't kill him yet."

Jack wasn't unreasonable, (not all the time, however) so she released the poor guy. Unfortunately, he didn't seem to be grateful.

"I'm not telling you anything."

"This guy has balls." The thief chuckled.

"Not for long. I'll blow them off if he doesn't talk." To demonstrate, Jack reloaded her pistol.

The men gulped. James was glad he wasn't her enemy. "You heard the lady. No one gets paid enough to lose balls, man."

"She will kill me if I tell you anything."

Solemnly, Samara said. "Although I do not know who is the 'she' you mentioned, I am sure she is not here. But we are." A ball of dark energy was burning in her hand.

"Trust me. You don't want to make these ladies upset." James warned.

He didn't have to press hard. The mercenary almost yelled as Kasumi aimed her gun at his face.

"I'll tell you everything! Just ask."

That went well. James grinned. "Let's begin with a simple question. Who sent you?"

* * *

It wasn't easy to unlock the door while carrying two bags of grocery. Kaidan was worrying about it when he arrived, but someone already opened it for him.

"Oh, Major! Sorry I didn't see you." It was Brooks. She was just leaving.

Although he didn't like the woman, he still acted polite. "What are you doing here? I mean, how do you do?"

"I just wanted to see if she was alright. But she didn't want to be alone so I stayed with her... for hours." With venom in her voice, Brooks snapped.

The shy staff analyst had changed, and not in the good way. He wondered why.

He didn't leave Shepard alone. "Where is Butterfly?"

Brooks shrugged. "In her room, I think."

If he hadn't imagined it, he thought he heard her murmur under her breath.

"I really can't stand that little bitch."

"Sorry, what?"

Fast as lighting, the woman changed her tone. "Nothing. Should you stay here and keep talking to me, Major? I think the Commander is waiting for you. She wouldn't like it if I kept you here for long."

Something was fishy. "What do you mean?"

"See you later." Brooks pushed him into the apartment. "On the Normandy,"

"Wait. Did I miss something?"

"It would be better if she tells you herself. But I don't think it's necessary." Her smile was too sweet. "I'm going to work on the Normandy. Commander Shepard already signed me up. I'm looking forward to serving with you, Major Alenko."

Kaidan was lost for words. He could only watch as the staff analyst walked away. Shepard's clone was making a move. If he wanted to stop her, which he did, he must act fast.

He really hoped James would come back with something useful.

Making up his mind, he walked into the apartment to continue his charade. He had to buy them time. However, the light went down and the door abruptly shut behind him.

"Welcome back, Love." The fireplace lit up. Shepard in a robe was walking towards him. Her robe was so thin and transparent. The flame behind her showed him her body outline. Kaidan gulped hard as he saw she wore nothing beneath the robe.

"That looks heavy. Why don't you put them down?" Without waiting for his response, she took the grocery bags from his hands and then forcefully dragged him by his collar to the dinning area.

There, on the table, someone had already set dinner for two, surrounded with a hundred candles. It was a romantic decoration, Kaidan had to admit.

"Sit down." Shepard ordered.

_'If' _this woman was real Shepard, he would be more than willing to oblige. But he was sure she wasn't his Amala, so eating dinner with her didn't sound nice.

"Where's Butterfly?"

Shepard made a funny noise. "I sent her to bed early."

"Without having dinner? Butterfly is a biotic. She shouldn't skip dinner."

Of all people, he knew that Amala Shepard was a bit unsteady sometimes. But it couldn't compare with this Shepard. She changed her tone in a few heartbeat.

"I ordered her pizza. She ate it before going to bed. Do you really think I would ever let_my_girl starve?"

She stepped closer and he involuntary stepped backward. Her predator smirk made him shiver. He looked over his shoulder to find a way out but it was too late. She trapped him between the dining table and her.

"Shep... I don't..."

But she forced him to lay down on the table and rode his waist. "You're such a bad husband. You must be punished."

"Please, I..." His voice was cut as she yanked his shirt, ripping it apart. She ogled his body all over and licked her lips.

"Yeah, I call this dinner." Not so gentle, she dragged her nails on his chest.

Kaidan didn't want this woman, but he was still human. The pain aroused some part of him. He groaned in shame as Shepard grinned.

"I have wanted to do this since I laid my eyes on you." She whispered against his lips before licking and tasting his scar.

This was... almost felt like Shepard. She said that the night before Ilos. Kaidan never forgot that. The familiar taste, feeling, he almost let her overwhelm him.

The voice of an incoming message woke him from the lust-clouded state. He tried to get her off him but she forcefully pressed him down.

"You've got mail." Kaidan protested.

"I don't care." She kissed him again, more forceful. Her hands traveled down south until they reached his belt.

_No. Somebody help me! _He mentally shouted as he felt his belt come loose.

And then, the auto fire-extinguisher over their heads shot foam. A big cluster of white foam was falling straight on Shepard's head.

There was a long silence. Shepard slowly backed off as the chemical liquid began to fall down her face. By the look on her face, Kaidan though she was about to rant.

"The security system might have gone haywire. I... will fix it." Kaidan offered, a bit too eager.

"Do that, and fast." Without another word, she went upstairs. Probably to have a shower, he thought.

The very small part of him felt sorry for her. But he had more important things to do. The Major ran upstairs too, but to look for his daughter. Despite Butterfly's capability, he still was concerned about her welfare.

All the weight in his chest disappeared as he saw Butterfly sleeping on her bed. Sighing, Kaidan sat down on the bed beside her and then noticed the half-eaten pizza and soda can on the night table.

Because of her poor childhood, Butterfly was never picky about her food. She could eat anything, despite the taste or quality and never left leftovers. Besides, with her biotic appetite, she could wolf down a pizza in no time.

Curious, Kaidan checked her hands. They smelt of cheese. Marian White taught the girl to wash her hands before and after a meal. Butterfly would never go to bed while still smelling like food.

He shook her shoulders but she didn't respond. Her breath was still deep and even in deep sleep. Kaidan hated to think what was happening to his girl.

_That bitch drugged my daughter!_ He growled in rage. Amnesia or not, Shepard would never hurt her daughter. That bitch wasn't Shepard. He didn't need evidence to prove it.

He had to confront her. But Kaidan Alenko wasn't a reckless person. He knew he couldn't do it alone. If that woman could get rid of Shepard, she must be tough. Tougher than him, perhaps. And he also had to make sure Butterfly wouldn't be in danger.

If he confronted her right now, it would be a fight. Perhaps it would be safer if he lured her somewhere else.

A beep made him jump. It was an alert that he had a new message.

_"Got it. Back to the Normandy."_

James must have been in a hurry that he sent a very short message. It was his time to roll. He had to get fake Shepard to the Normandy. The ship was in Alliance's authority. If it didn't go as planned, they could fight without worrying about civilians.

It was easier said than done, though. He remembered he was ambushed near the Normandy's docking bay. The thief probably had her eyes on the ship. He wouldn't be surprised if she wanted to steal the Normandy.

Well, with that face, DNA, and fingerprints, she was legally Commander Shepard. It wouldn't be stealing if she took the ship. The only way to prevent that was to expose her real identity.

And the sooner the better.

He hated it, but he had to leave Butterfly like that. Although he called Jack to stay with the girl, it would take some time until the biotic chick arrived.

In the mean time, he had a witch to deal with.

* * *

Carefully, Kaidan stepped into the master bedroom. The false Shepard had already finished cleaning herself and dressed in a tank-top and shorts. He could see her skin was unmarked and paler than the real Shepard's.

Although he was sure this woman wasn't his Amala, he couldn't help but think they were very similar.

"Hey," she called him. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

Amala always said his eyes spoke his mind. Kaidan just hoped she couldn't read them. "I... Well, we have a situation."

Clearly, that wasn't what she wanted to hear. She huffed. "A situation! Aren't we having shore leave? I thought that meant I could just stay home and spend time with my family."

That sounded strange. It was hard to believe that someone who had gone through so much to steal Shepard's life would want only simple things.

"Really? That's what you want?"

"Why not?" Gently, she cupped his face. Her touch was so soft. He almost believed she was speaking the truth. "I want to be your perfect wife. Perfect mother. And at the same time, save the galaxy. _No one is able to do it, but me_."

"That's not going to be easy." The Major protested.

Not listening to his words, she circled her arms around his neck to bend him down. Her green eyes stared straight into his. "_I _am Commander Shepard. I can do anything."

She really meant it. Kaidan realized. This woman really believe in what she said.

"But... Admiral Hackett has a mission for us. We have to go to the Normandy."

The woman narrowed her eyes. He couldn't help but wonder if he did something wrong. "I called Specialist Traynor. She said those engineers were still working on the Normandy."

"Wait, you called Traynor?"

The specialist was on the Normandy since before they approached the Archives. If Shepard lost her memory, she wouldn't remember the woman.

The false Shepard probably realized that too. She opened her mouth to say something, but eventually shook her head.

"I hate it when she's right."

Kaidan wanted to ask, but a sting on his neck stopped him. He jolted from her and touched where he was stabbed. There was blood on his fingers when he looked at them.

"What have you...?" Suddenly, every muscle in him went numb. Kaidan realized briefly that the woman was wearing something that looked like a thimble on her pinky finger. A needle on its tip still red with his blood.

"It's a conflict, you know?" Ignoring his question completely, she carried him to bed. "Your wit made my work harder, but I will have you."

_What? What are you going to do to me? _He screamed, but the voice didn't leave his mouth. Although he was still conscious, every inch of his body lost feeling. He couldn't move or speak no need to say about using his biotics.

"She said I wouldn't able to fool you or your little girl. I didn't believe her. I won't give up, however. I'll bring you with me. You can resist as your heart desires, my beautiful boy, but I will bend you to my will, eventually."

_Who is she? _He wanted to ask, but somehow he thought he knew the answer. It was probably no one but Arachne. That crazy woman sent them a warning message after all.

Finally, he lost control of his body. His eyelids fell shut against his will. He almost couldn't feel it when the false Shepard kissed him.

"Rest now. It will be better when you wake up."

* * *

"Daddy, wake up!"

A small voice woke him up. Kaidan jerked awake with panic. He remembered clearly what happened. Then he worried about his daughter more than himself. The Major tried looking around although his entire body was still numb.

It was dark in the room. There was a blue light but it wasn't enough to brighten the room. He only could guess that he was in Shepard's cabin because of the fish tank.

Butterfly wasn't anywhere in sight. He felt a wave of fear rush through him. Only god knew what that woman was going to do to the girl.

With all the willpower he had, Kaidan fought the paralysis, like when he was paralyzed by the Collector's bug. He let his biotic run through his fiber. Unfortunately, that required too much energy. His amp was getting hot and it hurt like hell.

Closing his eyes, the thought of Butterfly crying for help gave him strength. The Major groaned in pain as he struggled to move. Finally, he fell off the bed although his eyesight was still hazy.

"Don't push yourself too hard, daddy."

The voice rang again. But he couldn't see anyone. "Princess, where are you? I can't see..."

"My physical body is in the starboard observation. That woman wouldn't let anyone touch it. Please don't worry." Butterfly sounded like she was crying.

"But I can hear you... How is this possible?" It was foolish to ask, since he already knew the answer.

"They disconnected Aunty EDI from the Normandy. I felt bad leaving the ship in their dirty hands, so I took over her for awhile."

"You hacked the Normandy?" Should he be surprised? His two-year old daughter was the Blue Fairy who hacked her way into the safest server in the galaxy. She even appeared in his dream. Common sense couldn't justify her ability anymore.

"You can say that. Well, I still need your help."

"What do you mean?"

"Don't you feel her heartbeat, dad? The Normandy is flying. They are trying to take her off the Citadel. I can stop them, but I'm not sure if I should do it now."

"What do you mean?" Confused, he just kept saying the same sentence like an idiot.

"Because mommy is here."

* * *

First of all, I must thank The Lonely Traveler for beta. Sorry that my writing is a bit slow. I'm busy with real life.

To Trishata96: Thank for review :D But you will get your answer in the next chapter. I can't say anything now.


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